A/N: I've never read "The Alchemist", but I plan to. And I don't know if it's ever been printed in the little booklet I gave Al, either. And, since I'm a girl, I don't know how a guy responds to his first hard-on or anything :)

Disclaimer: I don't own FMA or "The Alchemist". If I owned "The Alchemist", I'd have died in 1930-40-something.

"Ed!"

Ed peeked out the bathroom door, clutching his towel tight around his waist. Water dripped from his long hair into his mouth when he replied, "What?"

Al came halfway to where the bathroom was, not wanting to discomfort his elder brother. "I found this short story under one of the beds. It sounds interesting."

Ed rolled his eyes. "If it's not about getting home or mechanics I don't want to hear abou--"

"It's titled "The Alchemist", brother."

Ed stared at Al for a moment, unsure of what to think. "When was it written?"

Al flipped the pages of the small booklet in his grasp for a moment, ending at the first page. He examined it. "Well, this was first printed in 1916 and was written about sixteen years ago in 1908."

Rolling his eyes once more, Ed said, "Then I don't think it'll have anything to do with the Thule Association." Without another word he disappeared back into the bathroom, not quite done with his shower. It was around 9-ish that night and he really wanted to get some sleep. As he dropped his towel and turned the knob again, he suddenly wondered if he was being watched.

He looked around the room, soon feeling silly for thinking of such a thing. There was no way someone could be watching him! He laughed softly to himself as he stepped in, smiling at the warm spray of water hitting his chest. He glanced at his automail, frowning at the bit of red.

"This place hates automail..." Ed mumbled, watching the blood being washed away by the water. "Either that or I screwed it up."

He moved his right fingers, trying to remember all the long speeches about automail maintenance. Now that he no longer had Winry to fix all his problems, he had to be extra careful with his metal limbs. In this world he had no infinite supply of money, no fabulous mechanic, and no way of getting it all back. But the bright side, no matter how dim it seemed, was that he now saw through the eyes of a normal person. He didn't have anymore luxuries from the military, only what he and Al could gather up. They tended to depend on people for help now, so it was as if their position in society was switched from people-helping Alchemists to poor little blond kids roaming the streets.

Ed picked the soap up gently in his left hand, not sure if the substance would mess up his automail. He guided it to glide over his body, tiny suds appearing where the water wasn't reaching thoroughly. A sudden image shocked him, and he dropped the bar of soap. He put that hand to his forehead, almost as if pushing the picture away. Why'd he just think of him?!

"Stupid...it's just because he's been bugging you lately..." he reasoned to himself. He blushed a deep red hue when he brought the image back from his memory. Now he hid his face in his palm, embarrassed. "But damn..." he whispered in awe, eyes closed and his mouth forming into a small grin.

Ed shook his head a little and went back to washing himself. He took a little longer on his hair than usual, finding a need to make it more appealing somehow. As he reached to turn off the water, he heard something and he wasn't sure if it was himself or the Homunculus that haunted him.

"Don't!"

Ed looked around. That voice sounded just like his own...it couldn't have been Envy...right? After a moment of hesitation he retreated his hand, standing up straight. A part of him was expecting more orders, but the words never came. Then a feeling came over him, making him think that turning off the water, thus ending the shower, was a bad thing.

He cocked his mouth to the side, a flat look on his face. Okay, the water felt good but ending the shower was not a bad thing, and he knew it. Ed chuckled a little.

"That was stupid." he muttered, reaching out once more for the knob. His fingers touched it just as the voice came back, this time harsher and more demanding.

"I said DON'T, you IDIOT!!"

Ed flinched. That time it was his voice mixed with Envy's. Well, he had to give the devil his due, that was smart when before he faked Ed's voice to make him think it was a subconscious thought. His face twisted into a disgusted look, though he was still embarrassed.

Idiot palm-tree...

"I heard that!"

Ed sighed, and stood up with his arms crossed, the shower still going.

So why shouldn't I turn the shower off? Ed thought, trying out a little idea of his. Maybe if he focused he could actually talk with Envy with his thoughts, no matter how unscientific the idea seemed then.

There was a pause, during which Ed gasped when his automail sent a jolt of pain through his body. Strings of blood escaped from the area where the automail was connected to his shoulder, the water mixing in with it to make it fade as it ran down his muscled body. For a moment thoughts of blame crowded his mind, all of them directed at Envy.

"Because I said so."

Quit hurting me!

"Huh? Chibi, I can hardly talk for very lon--"

Ed clutched his shoulder until the pain subsided. So Envy wasn't behind this? That meant that either of his previous explanations were it and not the new one he'd come up with. But he hadn't failed to notice that Envy spoke more as he bled. Was there a connection between the two? Or was it just a coincidence?

He shook his head, waiting for Envy's voice to return. It never came back, even as the trickles of blood seeped their way from the metal. Slowly he worked his arm in circles, glad when there were no jolts or anything. The bleeding soon stopped, and Ed was convinced Envy wasn't going to speak much longer.

When he looked down to his feet to search for the dropped soap bar he was shocked to see what he saw. He hadn't noticed before that his lower regions were throbbing slightly, and now he blushed profusely.

What the hell?!

"Thinking dirty things, Edward?"

It throbbed again, this time causing Ed to squeak. Okay...that was odd. Envy just said his name and--

Ed's blush increased. He wasn't sure what was going on; this hadn't happened before...

"You've never had a hard-on? Wow."

Envy's voice held a tone of wanting to continue, as well as sheer amusement, but for some reason he didn't. Ed gritted his teeth, staring at his erection. The image he'd thought of earlier popped right back with a few more alluring details and his heart beat increased.

He never knew Envy could look so...so...

Quickly he shut off the shower and leapt out, throwing a towel around his waist and panting due to his increased heart rate. He didn't want to look down; he could already tell that the towel was a bit higher in the middle just from the amount of draft around his right leg.

"Calm down, Ed. Calm down. It's nothing, nothing at all. Just don't think abou--"

"You know, I've actually tried that pose just for kicks before. Did you see it or something? 'Cause that's pretty accurate. Well, minus the orgasmic look, of course."