Darn it! I just realized another goof up with character ages(I have way too many mess ups). Remy was supposed to be seventeen. I'm sorry! Please forgive me!

My thanks goes out to all of my beloved reviewers and especially to my Mom (Hey, it's not as corny as it sounds . . .okay, maybe it is. Live with it.), my cousin Amanda, and DEFINITELY Pookwana. She's the one who suggested where they go to lunch. Muahahahahahahaha!

)X-Men(

1:17Pm. Location: A Wal-mart somewhere in northwestern Kentucky.

Logan stood in the pets department staring at a jar of feeder cricket food labeled 'Gut-load'.

"Somehow that just doesn't sound like good chow," He said to his shirt pocket as he scratched the back of his neck.

"Chirp-cheep," Squeaky replied.

"Yeah, you're right. It's better than nothing," Logan said, picking up the jar of yellow gel-like gloop. "Now to find the kids." And maybe get some new clothes, he thought as the itch moved again

)X-Men(

In women's clothes . . .

"Hey, Jean. Try on this blouse," Kitty said, holding up a green shirt.

"I don't think so. Logan and Bobby should be done shopping soon," Jean said.

"Okay . . . Renee," Kitty said.

"I don't want to," Renee said.

Kitty looked at Jean and Renee with a 'Pretty please' look.

"Hey Kitty! Come look at this skirt," Jubilee said from another area.

Thank you! Jean thought as Kitty went over to Jubilee.

)X-Men(

And in electronics . . .

Rogue skimmed through a box of marked down CDs in boredom. Don't they have any good music? She scowled as a CD featuring 'Muskrat love' surfaced.

"Hey, Rogue. Check it out. I found a CD vith 'Muskrat love' on it," Kurt said. "And as a bonus it has 'Kung fu fighting' and 'Tiptoe through ze tulips'."

One person's trash, Rogue thought as she shook her head.

"And it's only five dollars! Ve can have something to listen to on ze trip," Kurt said enthusiastically.

"Oh Yay," Rogue said dryly. "Ah'm not gonna be in the same car with that thing."

"Vhat's wrong vith it?" Kurt demanded.

Rogue shook her head. "Never mind."

)+BROTHERHOOD+(

And in women's lingerie . . .

The Brotherhood boys minus Lance and plus Bobby were wreaking havoc on said department. Something they are extremely good at.

Bobby was wearing a red, lacy double 'D' cup bra on over his shirt and had stuffed a grapefruit in either side of it,

Pietro was zooming around with a pair of yellow panties on his head,

and Todd and Fred were trying to convince John to put on a pink bra with matching panties. The bra had 'Hot' written on it and the behind of the panties read 'Stuff', both in fancy flame writing.

"Oh, c'mon, John!" Todd said.

"There is no way I'm going to humiliate myself like that," John huffed with his arms crossed over his chest and his chin stuck up in the air. "They're not my color. They clash with my hair."

"They have the same ones in different colors," Fred informed. "Here's blue, green, orange, red-"

"Gimme the red!" John said.

"Yo, Pietro! You owe me five bucks!" Todd yelled.

Bobby was running through the department. Grapefruits flopping in the wind, when he had a collision with a very tall, very wide . . . 'woman'.

"Er, I'm sorry Mister, I mean Miss, miss," Bobby stuttered as he stood in the persons' shadow.

"Do zhey 'ave zees een a beegar size?" The woman asked in a thick German accent as she fingered the bra Bobby was wearing.

"I-I-I think so . . . over there," Bobby pointed.

"Donka," The woman said and pinched Bobby's cheek.

"N-no p-problem," Bobby swallowed loudly.

When the woman was out of sight Bobby went back to the Brotherhood boys. "I'm going . . . to another department," He stated.

"Yo, Bobby, you okay? You look kinda . . . green," Todd said.

"Yeah . . . sure," Bobby remarked before dumping the grapefruits and bra and running out of the department.

"He seemed . . . jumpy," Fred commented.

Todd shrugged.

)X-Men(

Just outside the lingerie department . . .

"Bobby? What are you doing here? I thought you were supposed to be getting new sneakers," Lance snapped irritably as he ran into a clammy, shaking Iceman.

"I-I-I g-got s-side tracked," Bobby said and ran off with his sneakers squish-squishing as he went.

"Those X-Geeks need serious help," Lance muttered as he made his way to mens' clothes.

)X-Men(

Just inside the automatic doors . . .

Remy sat on a bench and allowed memories to wash over him in an overwhelming flood.

Images of past mischief flowed through his mind.

Getting in brawls with Fara when he was small, getting in brawls over Fara when he was older, pulling pranks on the old man down the road just to prove he could, getting his mouth washed out with soap when he used words he shouldn't, sneaking off to go fishing in the middle of the night only to be dragged back home by his ear, Fara's loyalty and 'What's the big deal?' attitude when his powers manifested . . .

Good times, Remy thought. I've got a lot now but I lost a lot too, He sighed. He could practically see Fara's haunting green eyes. Not the phantom images of most memories, but a pure image of deep emerald green.

Maybe that's part of the reason I'm drawn to Rogue. Those eyes remind me so much of Fara . . . A guilty twinge hit Remy. It's not like I could have stayed, I was in too deep of trouble, He told himself as he shuffled his cards. So why do I feel so lousy?

)X-Men(

Scott Summers -the perfect example of a future bureaucrat- now found himself holding a bottle of food coloring. The weapon of choice against a powerful enemy.

"This isn't me. This is some kind of road trip demon that's possessing me. I don't do this kind of stuff," Scott told himself.

"Oh admit it. You're turning to the dark side, Anakin Skywalker," Wanda scoffed.

"So who are you pranking?" Tabitha asked.

Scott was silent.

"Is Mr. Perfect going to prank his girlfriend?" Tabitha smirked after the silence.

"I didn't say that," Scott said.

"You don't have to. We can see it in your eyes," Wanda said.

"It's all in good fun," Scott informed.

"Bull. You're getting revenge and you know it," Wanda said. "That's why you're being defensive."

"I'm not being defensive," Scott argued.

"Right," Tabitha said sarcastically.

)X-Men(

1:36Pm. Location: Wal-mart parking lot.

Logan had succeeded in retrieving all of the kids before security forcibly removed them-An accomplishment he was rather proud of.

"Can I talk to you for a minute, Logan?" Scott asked.

"Sure," Logan said.

The two moved a short distance away from the group.

Scott didn't share his concerns until he was sure they could not be overheard.

"Is it just me or is something wrong with Remy?" He asked.

"Somethin's wrong with Gumbo." Logan nodded in agreement.

"What should we do?" Scott asked.

"Nothing. If he needs help he'll ask for it," Logan said.

"So that's it?" Scott inquired.

"Yeah. For now," Logan said.

They went back to the groups and settled into their vehicles, braced for the trouble ahead.

Logan had just pulled out of the parking lot when Bobby spoke up.

"We forgot my sneakers," he announced.

Logan was pretty sure that was when the migraine hit. He recklessly turned the truck around and stopped just in front of the building. He handed Bobby twenty-five dollars. "Out of truck. Into the store. Get shoes. Get out. Got it?"

Bobby nodded and jumped out of the truck.

"You seem to be in a really bad mood lately, Logan. Is everything okay?" Kitty asked innocently.

Logan's eye twitched. "Yeah. Sure, kid. Peachy," he replied in a maniacally calm and terrifying voice.

When Bobby returned Logan waited just long enough for the boy to get in the vehicle before he hit the gas.

He just pulled out of the parking lot when he heard another announcement.

"I'm hungry," Kurt said.

Logan sighed. Last time they ate he had nearly been mauled by a three-year-old and Todd had gotten stuck in one of the play place tunnels. That was yesterday evening. There's no way I'm going back to McDonald's. He looked around. There was a White Castle. Please tell me there's somewhere else to eat! He thought as the idea of being trapped with a bunch of flatulent teenagers crossed his mind. Maybe if I drive fast, they won't see it.

"Hey, look! There's a White castle!" Bobby said.

"I hate my life," Logan groaned.

"Belly bombers!" Kurt exclaimed.

"Please! Anything but that!" Logan whimpered.

"There's a Chuck. E. Cheese," Kitty pointed. "They'll have a salad bar."

"That works," Logan said as he considered the alternative.

They pulled into the parking lot of the Chuck E. Cheese and had just gotten into the crowded building when the attention of everyone there was captured . . .

"I'm, too sexy for my shirt. Too sexy for my shirt so sexy it hurts-"

"What in the H-," Logan spluttered but was interrupted by Remy.

"Dat just ain't your ring-tone, Mona mi," he said, pointing at the cell phone on Logan's belt.

"-And I do my little turn on the sidewalk-"

Logan stared in shock and amazement for a minute before he regained consciousness enough to answer the phone.

"Logan," He announced into the phone. "Hey 'Roro . . . at a Chuck. E. Cheese in Kentucky . . . don't ask . . . yes, Mapquest was involved . . . I did ask for directions! . . . the noise in the background? . . . that would be a bunch of teenagers laughing hysterically . . . why are they laughing? . . . It would seem that some wise-guy changed the ring-tones on my phone . . . you don't wanna know 'Roro . . . fine, I'll tell you if you think it's that important . . . I'm too sexy . . . stop laughing at me, dang it! . . . it's not funny! . . . it's sure as heck not that funny . . . what do you mean the manicurist is looking at you weird? . . . wait a minute! Where are you that you're getting a manicure anyway? . . . I hate my life . . . yes I'm whining . . . how is it that you have such a thing as vacation time? . . . yeah, laugh it up . . . some day they'll get you too . . . whaddya ya mean 'I'm more fun to torture'? . . . I think that qualifies as abuse . . . and that is harassment . . . MASSAGE! You're getting a massage? . . . I've really gotta discuss some changes with Chuck . . . alright, I'll see you then. 'Bye." He turned off the phone and glared at each guilty-faced teen in turn. "I don't know who did this, but whoever it is will pay," he said in a menacing whisper. He turned around and looked around at the other customers who wear staring and laughing. "What's so funny? Turn around and eat!" he snarled and the alarmed people immediately obeyed.

The X-kids and Brotherhood made their ways to the salad bar.

"Do you have Bac-os instead of bacon-bits?" Kitty asked one of the employees.

"Sorry, kid. You'll have to use the real thing or do without." The man shrugged.

"I can't eat bacon, I 'm a vegetarian," Kitty stated.

"That's your problem," the man replied.

"And I'm Jewish," Kitty added.

The man winced. "Sorry. I didn't mean to bother you."

"Too late," Kitty said and went to the table. Leaving her plate on the counter as an acknowledgment of her irritation.

"She can be offended all she wants. I'm eating," Bobby commented.

Rogue watched her friend walk to the table and noticed something wrong. Remy's not eating? She thought somewhat worriedly as she watched the Cajun lean back in his chair and shuffle his cards. I wonder if it's my fault? I didn't think the prank was that big of a deal, but then again I know so little about his past I don't really know how important it was . . . Rogue left the salad bar and went to Remy. "You alright?" she asked.

Remy looked up at her. "Sure, Chere. Remy fine," he shrugged.

"No you're not. What's up?" Rogue asked.

"Nothin', Chere. Homesick's all," Remy said, avoiding eye contact.

"Why're you lyin'?" Rogue demanded.

"I'm not," Remy gritted.

"Can Ah do anythin'?" Rogue asked in the hopes of lessening Remy's dark, irritable mood.

Remy stared hard into Rogue's eyes for a second. "Non, Chere."

Rogue sighed. "If Ah can do anythin' tell meh," she said.

"A'righ', Chere," Remy said, forcing a smile and kissing Rogue on the cheek.

I wish he wouldn't do that, Rogue thought as her fear of injuring someone gnawed painfully at her mind.

"Don' worry, Chere. You're not gonna hurt me," Remy said, reading the look on Rogue's face.

"Ah'm just, scared," Rogue mumbled.

"Don' be," Remy replied with a grin.

"And wait a minute! Who gave you permission ta kiss meh?" Rogue snarled when it occurred to her what had just happened.

Remy blinked innocently at her. "You didn' seem to mind, Chere," he purred before jumping out of her reach and going to the salad bar.

Rogue stood planted in place, seething. "That . . . Cajun," she growled.

Remy turned around and grinned at Rogue.

"Jerk," Rogue mumbled.

"Hey, Rogue. Have you seen Logan? He's missing," Kurt said as he approached his sister.

"No. He's probably just decidin' how to kill us all." Rogue shrugged.

-------

"Speed demon."

WHOP!

"Toad."

WHOP!

"Lance."

WHOP!

"Pyro."

WHOP!

"Elf boy."

WHOP!

"Scooter."

WHOP!

"Gumbo."

WHOP-WHOP-WHOP! . . . WHOP!

"Kitty."

WHOP!

"Jubilee."

WHOP!

"Bobby."

WHOP!

"Chuck.."

KER-WHOP-WHOP-WHOP! SPLAT! WHOP! CRUNCH!

Squeaky watched in wide-eyed fascination as his newly acquired pet pummeled the whack-a-mole game, naming each innocent rodent as he went.

"Excuse me, sir. I need you to please not hit the games so hard. We don't want them damaged," one of the employees said as he approached Logan.

Logan turned around and faced the man, who, upon seeing the look on Logan's face, started shaking like an autumn leaf in a strong wind. "Fine," he growled and set the mallet down.

He started to walk away then turned around, picked up the mallet and beat the mole one more time with a resounding 'WHOP!'