Disclaimer: I don't own Friends or Joey nor am I making any money off this story, I just felt like writing.
Chapter Three-
Hours later Joey was onboard the plane on his way to New York. He was staring endlessly out into the night sky while trying to ignore the looks of pity he could see on the faces of those around him. The pity brought images to his mind. Images of a blonde hair, blue-eyed woman, with smiling white teeth and a cute dimpled cheek. They were images of the woman in of his dreams, the woman that was now only accessible in his dreams. They were images he didn't want to be seeing because all they brought him was heartache.
Joey tried desperately to find a distraction, anything to change his train of thought to something less painful. He looked beside him and caught site of the little boy who was sound asleep in the chair next to his. The boy was an adorable picture to look at. He was snoring softly and every once in a while was muttering something in his sleep. He had one of his tiny arms wrapped firmly around a slightly tattered looking bunny rabbit and his thumb on his other hand was resting partly inside his mouth. The boy, Joey decided, was absolutely gorgeous but he didn't provide the distraction needed to get him away from his thoughts.
Joey looked around the cabin for something that would do the trick and only seconds later the captain found one for him.
"Please fasten your seatbelts," said the voice of the captain over the intercom, "there appears to be some turbulence up ahead. And if anyone is concerned we are on schedule and will be arriving at Newark airport in approximately an hour and thirty minutes."
An hour and thirty minutes and he would be back in New York. That thought provided just the distraction he needed, it wasn't the best but it would do the job. His mind once again got caught up in the memory of events gone by.
Four Years Earlier –
It had been a little over a year since Joey had partially confessed his feelings to Rachel. They hadn't spoken of it much since that night, which was exactly how Joey wanted it. They hadn't spoken of the fact that he could be up and moving to L.A at any time either, but he'd have to speak of it now.
So much had happened in the past year, Joey had gotten back to been himself, well at least he had gotten closer, Chandler and Monica had decided to adopt and their baby was due in two months time. Phoebe and Mike had gotten married and were now living in bliss. Estelle had died which had forced Joey to get a new, better agent and about eight weeks ago Ross and Rachel had called off the wedding and Rachel and Emma (who had gotten ginormous) were back living at his place, or his and Rachel's place as he had referred to it for so many years now.
Chandler and Monica had asked everyone around to their apartment for dinner as they had some news, so here they were, the six friends, plus a Mike and an Emma.
"Well as you guys all know, the baby's going to be here in about two months," began Chandler, "Well we decided we needed a new home, a bigger home, where we could raise our child."
"What? Why?" came the calls from around the table, though Joey stayed strangely silent.
"We don't want to raise our child in the city," answered Monica. "We found a place just outside of it, it's a good neighborhood, a beautiful home. We just closed the deal, we're moving in six weeks from today."
They continued conversing on this topic for a good half hour before Joey finally broke his silence.
"Hey guys, I have an announcement as well," said Joey softly.
"What's up Joe?" asked Chandler.
"I've ah… I've gotten a new job. It pays much better and I'm the star, I think it's going to be a hit," he said trailing off.
"That's great Joe."
"Good for you."
"No," said Rachel softly, then in a louder more determent voice, "NO!" Everyone stopped and looked at her.
"Rach…" Joey trailed off.
"No Joey," she said softly, her eyes welling up, "You haven't even mentioned this in so long, I thought everything was getting better, you have been so much better lately."
The other occupants of the table were looking back and forth completely confused.
"Rach…"
"No Joey, you're not going anywhere." She was yelling now. She stood up, "Where the hell is that bitch, I want to pound on her so hard."
"No you don't Rach, no you don't," said Joey looking at her with soft eyes.
Rachel looked at Joey for a minute before stalking out of the apartment. He turned back to the rest of the table.
"The job, its… um, it's in L.A. I leave in three days. My sister found me an apartment, she reckons it has a great view but won't tell me what of. We ah… start shooting next week."
"Who was that Rachel said we were blaming this on?" asked Phoebe, "I want to pound on her too."
"It's no one, don't worry about it. Look I've got to go." And with that he scooped Emma up and went off to find Rachel, all the while leaving five very confused people in his wake.
"Rach?" he said lightly tapping her door.
"Go away Joey." He entered the room.
"Come on Rach, you know why I'm doing this, you know I have to go."
After a few minutes where the only sounds that were heard were Rachel's small sobs and Emma's gurgling, she spoke again.
"When do you go?" she asked.
"Three days."
"Oh god. I don't want you to leave Joey but I know that's not going to make you stay. I guess if you have to-,"
"And I do," Joey cut in.
"Well I want to spend your last days together. I'm sorry about before, it's just we've grown so much closer since you told me about mystery girl, I guess I just was hoping you would change your mind."
"Rach, I can't stay, I love that woman too much to be around her and not be with her and I love her too much to tell her how I feel."
"I know, come on," she said taking Emma from him and putting her down in the cot, "I'll help you pack."
The next two days passed by in a blur for both Joey and Rachel. They spent the whole time packing and shared laughter and tears along the way. Each of the other four friends stopped by occasionally to help out as well but Joey saw those two days as a time when Rachel was completely his.
The night before he was due to leave Monica and Chandler threw him a going away party, which gave him a chance to say his goodbyes to everyone. He couldn't believe he was doing this, he was leaving his life behind, his safe little world, but it was the right thing to do, that he was certain of.
At about 10:30 Joey decide he better leave as he still had a bit of packing to do. He had said goodbye to everyone except Rachel. They were going to say them later in the night, after they had watched Cujo. Quite why Rachel wanted to watch Cujo again Joey had no idea, but she suggested it and he couldn't say no.
"Um everyone," he called, "I just wanted to thank you for coming and thanks for all you've done for me over the last ten years, I've got to be going now so goodbye… oh and Ross and Rachel, don't forget to send me an invitation to the wedding. I don't want to miss it." Actually, he thought, he would be quite glad to miss it.
"Um Joey, we broke up, you know that," said Ross confused.
"Yeah but you guys are Ross and Rachel, you'll get back together," and with that he left.
He had only been in his room sorting through clothes for three minutes when a knock sounded at the door.
"Come in Rach," he called.
"All right Mr. Matchmaker, what was all that about?" she asked while entering the room.
"Nothing," he said smirking at her, "Come on are you going to help?"
An hour later his life was packed up into thirty boxes and he and Rachel were settling into the lazy-boy to watch the movie. Fifteen minutes into it he realized he was back where it all began. His arms were wrapped around Rachel, protecting her from the bad happenings on the screen. His heart was beating wildly, just as it was the first time they watched this together. There were some differences however. His feelings were so much stronger this time, so much deeper.
"Aren't you scared?" asked Rachel.
That was another thing that was different. This time he calmly wrapped his arms tighter around her and whispered,
"You get used to it after a while and it gets pretty damn great." He couldn't help but smile.
"You're crazy Joe," she mumbled.
"I know Rach, I know."
Nighttime past and morning came. The six were standing in Joey's kitchen saying their very last goodbyes. The other five were standing in a line with Chandler first.
"Man," said Chandler.
"Man," said Joey with a smile. That was all that was needed, they hugged and Joey moved on.
"Phoebs, I'm going to miss you so much."
"I know. I still want to know who this girl is so I can pound on her a little bit," she said.
"If you ever do find out don't hurt a hair on her head." Joey gave her a hug then moved on to Monica.
"You know if you ever feel like coming over and cooking for me, you don't even need an invite."
"I'll come, I promise," she sobbed out.
"Ross, man. Any time you want to call, even if it is to talk about Dinosaur stuff."
"I know buddy. Nap partners for ever." They shook hands and Joey took a deep breath and moved to the right.
Now it was Rachel's turn. He couldn't do it, he didn't want to do it. He didn't want to say goodbye to the woman he loved. He spotted the nearest diversion and was about to take the chance to momentarily put off the horrendous task ahead but once he heard the sob escape her mouth he had to lift his head and look at her instead of the child in her arms.
"Rach, sweetie, don't cry," he said softly stroking the front fringe of her hair.
"I'm happy for you Joey, I just want you to know that. You deserve this, a fresh start and all. I wouldn't want you to not go," she said speaking through her cries.
"Don't try lying Rach, I can read your eyes like a book." He kissed her cheek. "I love you Rach, always remember that, always remember."
He turned to the others and quickly added, "I love all you guys." He was quite oblivious to the astonished look that had taken over Rachel's features.
"How come you're not taking the foosball table man?" asked Chandler in a quick attempt to divert the attention away from the emotional display they had just witnessed.
"It belongs here," he said simply, "Besides from what I hear Michael isn't exactly the foosball playing type."
"What about the couch?" Monica questioned.
"That belongs here too, and it's Rachel's. Don't let Chandler take it Rach it's ours not his. Us Cobra's have to stick together," he glanced at Rachel and was about to say more but the way she was looking at him all but petrified him. He had to leave.
"Goodbye everyone." He turned to walk away.
"Aw bye Joey." The voice was Phoebe's.
She ran forward and flung her arms around him, gave him a swift kiss on the cheek, then all but ran out the door. Monica soon repeated the actions and Ross followed her out but instead gave him a short hug.
Chandler walked up to him and gave him one last hug.
"They probably just didn't want to see you leave Joe, I've got to go too, I'm sorry." And with that he left.
Joey walked over to Rachel and Emma and took Emma off of her mom.
"Goodbye baby girl," he said, then lent in and kissed her on the top of her head.
"Bwy Oey," she said wrapping her arms around his neck. "When Bwak?"
"Not for a long time baby, you'll probably be a big girl and smarter than your Uncle Joey by then."
He handed the little girl back to Rachel and slowly raised his head to look at her face.
"Joe-,"
"I've got to go Rach."
He leant in and kissed her cheek. His lips lingered on the spot for a much greater time then was required. Slowly Rachel turned her head until her lips were upon his and she moaned as they brushed against one another ever so lightly. He closed his eyes and took in the intoxicating scent of her perfume, memorized the exact feel of her sweet supple lips and they exact sound that escaped her as she moaned.
"I've got to go."
The moment had passed and reality had to be faced, he turned and walked out of the door. He didn't look back either, not even when he heard the sound of Emma crying or the sound of Rachel's strangled voice calling his name. He kept on walking because he was walking towards a future full of hope, if he looked back he knew that Rachel would come to her senses and realize what they had just shared had been a in the moment thing and nothing more but he also knew if he looked back there was very little chance that he would be able to leave. So he kept walking and for the first time in two years he was walking towards somewhere that had a silver lining.
His parent's, Dina and Dylan met him when he arrived at the airport. They followed him into the terminal as far as they could before they needed a ticket to progress with him any further. He had just finished saying goodbye to them when he heard a voice behind him.
"You kiss me and then you run away. Is that just part of been Joey Tribbiani? Is that just what you do?" It was Rachel, a very broken down Rachel.
"Rach… What do you want from me?"
"It's me isn't it? The woman you are so desperately in love with, the woman who is driving you away?"
"No, it's not, it's someone else Rach. That… that thing that happened… that was just a strange thing that happened because of the emotions things because I'm going away," said Joey looking determinately into her eyes.
"I don't believe you," she said staring right back.
"It's true," he lied.
"You can read my eyes like a book." Out of the corner of her eye Rachel saw Joey's mother and sister exchange confused glances at that comment, but she did not care, she knew that Joey understood exactly what she was implying by saying those words.
"You can read her eyes like a book if you look into them, that's what you said about mystery girl."
"Rachel…"
"That's what you said about her. I remember every word you said that night Joey, because I thought it was the most beautiful thing a man has ever said about a woman. I always thought how lucky she was to have you loving her." She took a deep breath, "Don't lie to me Joey."
"It's someone else Rachel."
Rachel lowered her eyes to the ground and shook her head with a humorless smile playing at her lips.
"Just remember you looked right into my eyes when you said that, you looked right into my readable eyes just then Joey." And she left.
Joey stared absently after her for a minute before turning back to his family.
"Don't look at me like that Ma." Dina Tribbiani shook her head sadly, but Gloria just look pissed.
"Joseph Francis Tribbiani! What are you doing? You told us that you didn't want to tell her because she was happy, because she was engaged, because there was no way in hell that she could ever love you back. Looking at her just then all those things proved to be false. She wasn't happy, she wasn't engaged, there was no ring on her finger and by the fact that she kissed you I think it pretty safe to say that she could love you back."
"Ma… She belongs with Ross, they're lobsters," said Joey.
"Lob- What? Joey I don't care about Ross, I care about you. God knows someone's got to do it. Your unhappy here, I understand that, but you could be happy here, you could stay, you just have to put yourself first for once and go after that poor girl. I don't believe that anyone could ever love her like you do, be they her lobster or not."
"She's right Joey and you know it. You can be really stupid sometimes big brother but don't let now be one of those times. You love her, just let her know that and then let her make the decision on her own. You owe yourself that much, what's the worst that could happen, you're leaving anyhow," said Dina gently. "Look I noticed something between the two of you when I went to tell you about Dylan, that was before you even knew."
"You guy's her and Ross belong together, you'd know that if you saw them together when they were dating. I can't make her chose between us, it'll break her apart and I can't do that to her. I can't hurt her."
"You just did Joe," said Dina softly.
"Only because I love her, she'll move on and get over that."
"Well too bad Joe, I think she knows now," said Dina while glancing over the top of his shoulder.
He couldn't turn around. He didn't want to know how long she had been standing there for, he just wanted to get onto his plane and let all of this be over with. He just wanted to begin his new beginning already. He watched as his family walked past him and away. They didn't even say goodbye. He guessed they were just assuming that he would be staying now so there was no point in doing so.
After a few seconds of just staring blankly ahead, he felt her warm breath flow in rhythmic patterns onto the back of his neck.
"Joey…"
He turned around, tears were leaking out of her eyes, her beautiful face was been damaged and he was the one causing it. It was his worst nightmare.
"Rach…" They stood there for a moment before she spoke again.
"Look into my eyes Joey." He did. "Now let your walls down." He did. "Oh my god," she whispered with a strangled cry.
His look was intense. It was filled with deep passionate love. A love that was unconditional.
And then she kissed him. It was a kiss that took him up above the clouds. It was more then he ever imagined it to be. It was soft and tender, but passion fueled at the same time. They each rose one hand and bound them together by interlacing their fingers. Rachel's other hand was gripped tightly onto the back of Joey's neck, while Joey's was softly grazing the flesh upon her face. It went on for what felt like an eternity and the world felt as though it deserved to end when they finally had to break apart due to lack of oxygen. That was enough to bring Joey back to his senses.
"Rach… I've got to go or I'm going to miss my plane," he said, his eyes welling up.
"No Joey, don't go, please don't go," she begged him.
"You belong with Ross Rach, you know that," he whispered softly into her ear.
"No Joey," she cried, grabbing onto his shirt. "Joey please…"
"Come on Rach, let go." He was crying now too.
"No Joey, why didn't you ever tell me?"
"Because you didn't deserve the pain of knowing. Go Rach, go back to Ross, have a life together, give Emma a family, I just have to go."
"I love you Joey." He smiled slightly through his tears.
"I know you do Rach, I know." He kissed the top of her head, "I'll love you for an eternity, now go home," he said, detaching her hands from his shirt, "Go home Rachel."
She took a couple of steps backwards before lunging forward and giving him one last sweet kiss, and then she turned and walked away, disappearing into the crowd who were going about their own business rushing all kinds of directions through the airport.
On the plane ride to L.A a thousand memories of Rachel rushed through his head, but the most prominent was the most recent. That Kiss. He would never fall out of love with Rachel, that he was sure of, but he would be able to move on, be able to live in L.A. and not just survive like he was in New York. He hoped that he might even be able to find a woman that he would actually be able to give his love to. Falling in love with Rachel had taught him many things, but the most important was that love is a gift to be shared, it isn't something which should be bottled up inside because it is very capable of killing the people who try.
When he arrived at Los Angeles airport he walked out of the terminal only to hear his name been called.
"Joey!"
Then he saw her, his older sister Gina, racing toward him. She took one look at his face then said, "Don't worry Hun, we'll get you over her."
'And that she had,' thought Joey, coming back to reality. He had moved on with his life and had fallen in love again, this time with someone he didn't have to hide his feelings for, that he could go after freely. In retrospect Joey knew that moving out to L.A had been the right thing to do. He knew he was trying to not to think about all that had happened to him in the past four years but despite how much easier it would be to just forget, he didn't want to ever forget those events which had transpired, because it had been the happiest time of his life. His move to L.A had been the best thing to ever happen to him and the evidence for that was sound asleep in the chair beside him sucking his thumb with his arm wrapped around his mothers brown bunny.
A/N: Thank you once again for reading. A review would be greatly appreciated. The next chapter will be more flashbacks, this time into Joey's life in L.A and of him falling in love once again. After that the story will begin taking place more so in the present. Once again thanks. Oh by the way can you please not hate this chapter because I absolutely love it.