Notes: Like I said before, I'm still worried about my Ten voice. I think it's just 'cos after seeing the first couple of episodes, I can't possibly imagine him ever being guilty about anything. But I'm sure it is possible, and it's necessary to the plot anyway, so I hope you'll indulge me.

Not that I think Ten is superficial or denial-ridden or anything. Like I said, I really am giving him a chance. Not that he needs one, I'm just... Let's stop here before I dig myself too deep a hole. Ah, well. I keep pretending not to care about reviews; let's put the proverbial money where my mouth is...

(-)

And she showed me the way

"Rose! I'm so sorry. I didn't mean-- are you all right?"

Rose passed a hand in front of her eyes, feeling more dizzy than anything else, because she'd seen all this before. Not that she had any intention of telling him that. As soon as she was reasonably sure she could do it without losing her sense of balance, she nodded.

He was still standing where she'd left him, looking stricken. "My god. Rose, you can't be here. This isn't a place for you."

"Isn't a place for you, either," she pointed out, feeling particularly stubborn. After all, she had an ace up her sleeve, one she did not want to use: she couldn't leave without him. One thing she never wanted him to know, but she would tell him if it got them out of here. Even if nothing was ever the same again.

It already wasn't ever going to be the same again.

"Yes, but it's my mind. Hard for me to escape it. But you-- you can, and you have to get out of here, before I-- before it happens again."

"Not without you." C'mon, what else can I try-- she thought desperately, knowing he'd never forgive her if she blackmailed him out of here-- not to mention it probably wouldn't work anyway.

"But I--"

"Why the hell are you insisting on staying here?!" she cried. "Why d'you think this is where you belong?! 'Cos you do, don't you?! That's the real reason you won't try an' get out, because you--"

"It isn't that I won't try, it's that--"

"Your'e dumb enough to think it's what was comin' to ya! That's it, isn't it? You think it's just justice and everyone's better off! Well, you're WRONG!"

"Rose--"

"Stop being a selfish little git and WAKE UP already!"

He stared at her, openmouthed. "...Selfish?!"

"Yeah! Selfish!" She wasn't entirely sure how she was going to defend this position, but at least he was angry at something else now. "First you leave me an' Mickey off in the middle of an alien spaceship so you can go an' be with your chippy in France."

"She is not a chippy!"

"Okay, sorry, reflex. Forgot I only met her once."

"What are you talking about?"

"I'm sayin' it wasn't noble to leave us an' go an' trap yourself in France to be miserable with your girlfriend! I'm sayin' it isn't noble to lock yourself up an' feel sorry for yourself an' leave everyone else high an' dry!"

"I did not lock myself up!"

"Yeah, but you're the one who's got the key. An' you don't seem like you're tryin' very hard to escape!"

"I was distracted!"

"Yeah? Well, you aren't anymore. An' I don't see you lookin' for the exits! I see you standin' here an tryin' to tell me why I should just bugger off an' leave you alone!"

"I did not say that!"

"Yeah, well, it's what you meant. An' you know what? I'm not havin' it any more! I've put up with you tryin' to drive me off for god only knows how long, an' you know what? You're stuck with me now! I'm not leavin' till you suck it up and deal and come back home!"

She'd struck him speechless. Maybe out of anger, yeah, but that had to be a good sign, right?

"What's so just about you bein' stuck here for the rest of your life?" she continued, more reasonably. "What good does it do anybody? Doesn't help you. Sure as hell doesn't help me. Doesn't fix anything. Doesn't undo anything. Doesn't make anybody feel better. 'Cept maybe it feels better to you. So tell me. What about this isn't selfish?"

"...You don't understand."

"Oh yeah? Explain it to me."

"I can't. You've seen..." He gestured at the broken landscape, helplessly.

"Yeah. I have. An' no, I don't know what it was like. An' I can't. 'Cos I'm not gonna be you. I'm not gonna live a kajillion years an' fight Daleks and whatever else it is you've done. But that doesn't mean I'm wrong. Maybe it's hard, but it's still what you have to do. It's the only thing you can do. You get up, an' you keep movin'. You're not the only one in the universe who's been through hell. An' it's terrible-- I know it is, don't you see? But you can't keep punishin' yourself for it. Doesn't fix anything. Only thing it does is hurt everyone you know."

"...That's not a new thing, for me."

"Yeah. Noticed that too. So pay a little more attention next time. An' stop-- stop bein' so angry at yourself. You did the best you could, I know it. Stop beatin' yourself up about things that you can't change."

"...Rose--"

"You did the best you could," she repeated. "I know you. Even if you were wrong sometimes, what else could you have done with what you knew? An' you've just gotta-- you've just gotta deal with it, an' try to do better next time, an' move on. 'Cos we need you, Doctor. Everyone. We need you."

"...I don't think this is a place I can get out of, Rose."

"I think it is. I think you're the only person who can get out of here. That's what she told me. Try."

He looked at her for a moment. "The Ynn'ai, she said?"

A green park, emerald-green of a purity Earth's plants rarely achieved. But that was because this was the Royal Park, and had to be immaculate-- especially because you never knew when an unexpected ambassador might show up.

And a lovely pink sky, that eased his heart to look at. Almost as soothing as Earth's blue might be-- but he didn't dare visit Earth. He might draw the nightmare in after him. A miracle the Daleks hadn't remembered Earth yet in the first place; he didn't dare do anything that might jeopardize that.

But this planet was in the line of fire, and the Daleks would have no mercy.

"We are neutral," said their King, with the solemn bone structure he seemed to prefer today. "You must respect that."

"Ah, you see, we will respect that. It's just that the Daleks won't. The Daleks don't respect anything. They kill anything that isn't a Dalek, and that includes you."

The little girl beside him laughed; her mother shushed her with a murmured scolding about "serious meeting" and "protocol" and "learn how it's done". Shame she'd never have time to.

"Excuse my daughter's poor manners," said the King, "but it really is ridiculous. An entire race so devoted to destruction... it's impossible. You truly believe your own warlike propaganda, don't you?"

"It isn't propaganda," he said. "I've seen it with my own times, dozens of times over. It is what the Daleks are. It is what the Daleks do. Please--"

"Enough," said the King, rising. "We shall not become embroiled in your war."

"The Daleks aren't going to give you a choice!"

"We mean no harm to them. We are not hostile. They shall respect that. I suggest that you do the same."

"You have to understand, I mean this, you're the next in line--"

"We are not hostile to them. It would be a waste of their resources to attack us. Do not insult my intelligence, Doctor. We will not be cowed by your fearmongering to engage in warfare. We are above that. Come, Ri'anna, S'minia. I suggest you leave this place, Doctor. If not, we shall have to escort you to your vehicle."

"You're making a mistake!" he yelled, hearts racing, because it was happening again, again, and he couldn't stop it, could never stop it, there had to be a way--

--but-- there hadn't been, had there? Not even for him. And it was over, and unfixable, and all he really felt was sad.

All that death. No reason for it. Maybe it was just fatigue, but all he felt was sad.

This planet had burned, like so many others had... and like so many others would, if they were ignorant like this one. So many disasters, unavertable, except for knowledge-- the knowledge and expertise he made a life of providing.

To avert a few disasters. Or ameliorate them.

And it hurt like hell, but-- it was still worth it. It would hurt him so badly, but-- it was worth it.

And he was being kept from it.

But he really did have the key, didn't he? Always had, and always would.

And he wasn't going to stay here anymore.

(-)