A/N: I have just realised that I haven't been thanking everyone for the reviews! I am so sorry. So if you have reviewed at any point, thank you!
Disclaimer: If I owned Doctor Who, I would be busy rewriting Doomsday. Instead I wrote this. And this is not making anyone any money.
The Doctor sighs. He would look at his watch, but it would be a pointless action as he's certain that he can't have been waiting for a year, much as it feels like it. He settles for tapping his foot and trying to whistle through his teeth. He'd just got the hang of it in his seventh regeneration when he regenerated. Never managed it since. Although he must admit this is a new experience for him. He's probably spent a few centuries of his life in some sort of cell, holding area, experimentation section whatever they call it; but then he was always formulating an escape attempt, his mind flinging out ideas. Unlike now. He stares blankly at the opposite wall, not really seeing it.
Why is Jack insisting that Romana tries on her top now? When Rose bought new clothes, she might take them out of the bag and hold them up but otherwise, he saw them when she wore them. And why buy Romana a top? This Tardis holds quite possibly the largest, most varied wardrobe in the universe. If this is what's going to happen, next time he needs to do vital work on the Tardis he'll simply lock them in their rooms. At least they didn't manage to find any trouble in mid nineties suburban England. He's not sure whether that surprises him.
"Ta-da!" Romana bounds into the room.
The Doctor takes one look at her.
"JACK!"
xxx
"So I dropped you off beside a cinema, and you decided to wander in the opposite direction and got lost."
"But then we found a church, and there were lots of girls there. A few years older than me. Wearing a brown and yellow uniform."
"You walked into a Brownie pack." The Doctor knows what's coming next.
"Their, what was it, Brown Owl? She was nice." Jack never misses a cue.
"And they were doing custom t-shirts! Jack did this one and I did this one." Romana lifts her top to reveal another with large blotches.
The Doctor eyes them cautiously. "I don't think tie-dying is a natural talent of yours, Romana."
"And then I did this one." Romana reveals another decorated with slightly wobbly Gallifreyan script.
"That's good. You're really improving. What does it say?" She rolls the tops up further and he scans it quickly. "I think you can rest assured that no-one else will have a top that proclaims their name in Gallifreyan."
"I don't know…I think you'd look good in it. Bright pink paint, of course," Jack grins.
The Doctor treats him to a "Not amused" look. Queen Victoria was famous for it, but he knows that rulers all over the universe wear the same look when banishing him from their empires. Even the ones that don't have faces. Not many people would believe that a flower could look unamused. There's probably a deep and meaningful reason behind such similarity the universe over. Possibly related to the meaning of life.
"How was it that Romana was able to complete two quite complex designs in the time it took you to paint two words?"
Jack simply smirks.
"And this one…"
"Three complex designs," the Doctor corrects himself.
"No, I didn't do this one."
"Two complex designs." Jack doesn't often get the chance to correct the Doctor.
"I did do three; I just didn't do this one."
"Three complex designs." The Doctor resists the urge to add 'so there.' Switching his attention back to Romana, he enquires "Where did you get that one then? And what happened to your third design?"
"Sarah gave it to me. We swapped."
He looks at the top. It's small and tight, quite unlike the other two or any shirt Romana likes to wear. There's a large pale pink heart in the centre with purple frills. The whole design has been liberally scattered with multi-coloured sequins and glitter.
He comments on this.
"Nothing compared to mine. I drew a landscape. Sun, sea…purple sparkling sand. I hope it doesn't all flake off." She pulls the layers of tops down and wanders over to the door.
"She was nice…I hope she has a good life." She has no idea what effect her simple statement will have.
xxx
The Doctor watches as Romana laughs with Jack. He smiles, but his thoughts are troubled. He had frequently moaned that it was like having two kids to look after, but now he thinks that's better than having Romana grow up too fast. All those girls would have been picked up by their family, taken back home, to a house, eaten dinner, gone to bed, woken up and carried on with their ordinary lives. A normal life. A stable life. Romana walked off with a renegade Time Agent from the 51st century and came back to her home, the last Tardis in the universe, to her father, the lonely god who destroyed his people. After a night cycle, she could be anywhere in time and space. Her family consists of said renegade Time Agent, said alien and her maternal grandmother. She has no friends her own age. She has no friends at all. He had such a lonely childhood, he grew up too quickly. He doesn't want that to happen to Romana.
xxx
A crowd of boys, standing around. Basic housing surrounding them. A boy steps toward her. He says something but she doesn't listen. She's trying to remember where she's seen him before.
"Why are you dressed for bed? It's the middle of the day."
He's not supposed to say that. People in dreams never comment on oddities. Everything makes sense in dreams, a sort of twisted logic. But this is not making sense.
There's a massive bang from the direction of the console room. She tumbles out of bed and runs.
xxx
"And he asked me why I was dressed for bed and said it was the middle of the day. I didn't say anything because I was trying to work out why I recognised him, but I remember that I thought it was odd that he said that. Then I woke up because you had rerouted the neutron flow to the secondary power source," she laughs up at him.
He smiles slightly at her choice of words. Anyone else would simply have said "I woke up because you caused an explosion." This dream has made his mind up, the idea that she dreamed of a large crowd of children, playing together.
But they still have a few hours till Jack will wake so he rises from the sofa and inserts another disc into the player. All the movies are stored, and he could just select one with the remote, but he likes to get up and stretch occasionally. He sits back down and Romana flops across his lap. He could tickle her mercilessly, or he could watch the film, which he now notices is Gifght Yjan Ukan, a Hahijanrain film which Romana won't understand. He tickles her mercilessly instead. She's ticklish in exactly the same places as Rose.
xxx
He waits until she goes to bed. Instead of performing some slightly-needed repairs, he sets a course. The Tardis groans reluctantly.
"Stop it. This is for the best."
The Tardis jerks a little more forcefully than usual.
"We're not abandoning you! We'll come back at weekends."
A shadow settled on his face as he contemplates the idea of a normal, nine to five, beans on toast life.
A creak rouses him from his dreary thoughts.
"Yes, I know! But it's the best thing to do. I don't want Romana growing up as I did."
The Tardis groans again.
"Yes, I know that the circumstances are completely different but…" He listens for a while. "I'll drop Jack off on a pleasure planet and pick him up after however long he wants."
A rasp echoes through the room.
"I know!" The Doctor drops into his chair, cradling his head in his hands.
xxx
Romana notices they're not drifting aimlessly as soon as she hops into the console room.
"Where are we going?"
The Doctor's standing by the console, his back to her. She misses his reply first time.
"London, 2014," he repeats.
"Are we going to see Nanny Jackie?"
She doesn't miss the slight stiffening of his back, or the pause before he replies.
"Yes."
"So where are we going? Do you think she'll like Ralady?"
"I'm sure she would."
Romana freezes and the Doctor quickly runs through fifty-five appropriate curses in his mind.
"What do you mean, would? We always go somewhere."
The realization makes her sick to her stomach.
"We're not going." She's breathing shallowly, while her mind shuts down in disbelief. How could he do this?
He turns to face her. "Romana, I…"
That tiny piece of her mind suddenly reconnects and she's throwing herself past him, wrenching every control she can see, anything to stop him dumping her.
The Tardis shrieks and lurches, throwing Romana head-first into the wall.
xxx
She opens her eyes and looks at a familiar white ceiling. The med-bay. She turns her head- it's actually quite painful- and finds the Doctor slumped in a chair next to her. He stirs.
"Romana, I…"
He doesn't get any further as she hurls all her weight against him. By the time he's picked himself off the floor, she's disappeared. She won't get far. He lays a hand against the wall and the Tardis makes a reassuring sound.
xxx
She stumbles along the corridor. She doesn't notice the way the corridors shift just before she enters them, the way she's guided in a circular path. She's blinded by tears. She doesn't even see the Doctor until she runs into him. She fights as desperately as she had when it was Jack that held her. But then she'd been fighting to get to him. Now she's fighting to get away.
She writhes and twists, kicking at his legs, flailing wildly towards his face. His grip on her shoulders doesn't loosen.
She stamps on his foot as hard as she can.
"I hate you!" she screams.
That hurts. That hurts a lot. He jerks a little as his hearts freeze and his stomach informs him of its opinion on evacuation. He feels what some might call his soul wither and his mind cries in distress. No, please. Not her. Anything but that. Please, no.
The only outward sign is in the increase of the pressure of his fingers. Romana doesn't even notice. She's crumpled and is choking words out between her tears.
"You said…said…you promised not…not to leave me."
He stares down at her blankly. Something inside him is screaming to hug her, comfort her, wipe away her tears and fix whatever he's done wrong but those three words hang threateningly in the air, a wall of pain-filled venom.
She looks up to find him gazing at her. His eyes are empty. She's seen them brimming with pain, burning with anger, bright with laughter. But now…there is no emotion there. None at all. It's the most terrifying thing in the whole universe.
She backs away slowly, his hands sliding limply from her shoulders. The horror is evident on her face. He's gone. He's left me.
Only when she bumps into the corner does she turn her back and run as fast as she can away from the entity that used to be her father.
xxx
Jack is getting seriously annoyed. For over three weeks, they have drifted in the vortex and he's had approximately three minutes of conversation, catching Romana as she drifts through the corridors, or receiving monosyllabic sounds as he tries to talk to the Doctor's legs. Occasionally the Tardis lands them somewhere, or Jack tries to enter some coordinates, but to no avail. Romana simply barricades herself in her room and the Doctor disappears into the depths of the Tardis. Jack has tried to get Romana out, but she simply doesn't answer. He's tried to enjoy himself away from the stifling atmosphere, but the incident with the trees ends that. He'd bounced out of the Tardis but ended up wandering aimlessly, his mind totally preoccupied. He'd ended up kicking a tree in frustration, and they turned out not to be trees, and not very amused about being kicked. He'd had to run for his life back to the Tardis. On his own. When he dived through the doors, the Doctor had simply looked up before setting a course away and disappearing. There was no laughter, no smug Doctor giving a lecture on the trees, which of course would have a long unpronounceable name, no comments about Jack's charm being unappreciated. He doubts Romana even knew that he'd left the Tardis.
He knows there's something deeply wrong between the two of them. The atmosphere is similar to when the last Doctor and Rose had a massive falling out over something ridiculous. But that had been made up in a few hours. This is different; nastier and more prolonged. Romana stays in her room or drifts through the corridors like a wraith; her only colour in her red eyes. The Doctor spends his time under the console or somewhere in the depths of the Tardis; Jack hasn't seen his face since he bid the Doctor a good night and got the usual remark about stupid apes wasting their lives sleeping. Something happened that night. Jack hasn't seen them in the same room since. And if they won't make it up themselves, then he is going to do something about it. Even if he has to lock them together till they make up or starve. But maybe he should try again to find out what the problem is first.
xxx
A month and a half. Six weeks. And the rift is still as ugly as ever. About a week ago, Jack caught the Doctor in the kitchen, with a cup of tea that was almost congealing. He hadn't said anything or moved a muscle all the time Jack had been in there. Hadn't even given any indication that he was aware of Jack's presence. He'd tried to talk to the Doctor, tried to find out what the problem was, but had to give up. That was the last he'd seen of the Doctor.
The last time he'd seen Romana was two weeks ago. She had scared him. He's scared of what she is and what she isn't. Scared for her. The lively girl that bounced around so full of life is gone, replaced by this wisp of a child. She only speaks when she is pressed for a reply, and then her voice is distant and cold. The last thing she said to him was "Please leave me alone." So polite but so wrong. He often used to walk into her room; it doesn't have a lock. Then she'd throw herself at him and try to push him out until they collapsed from laughing. Or she'd do her best to bury him under a mound of pillows, blankets, clothes and soft toys and he'd throw them right back and sometimes the Doctor would appear in the doorway just in time to get hit by a missile that Jack had dodged and would end up joining in on one side or the other.
Jack sighs as he comes back from his memories. He'll give them another two weeks.
xxx
The two weeks is up. That makes it a total of two months. He doesn't understand why he doesn't just leave and let them get on with it. Or maybe he does and he just doesn't want to think about it. Rule One for a Time Agent: you don't get attached, you use people to your advantage, you always look out for yourself. He's the devastating charmer who's flirted and conned his way through time and space. He is most definitely not supposed to be thinking of these people as his family, wishing he had his own daughter. But the Time Agency dumped him minus two years of memories. Their rules and principles were chucked out a few hours after meeting an attractive blonde and her mysterious companion. He lost them once. Then he found his home again. And he is not going to walk away.
xxx
"I want to get to my room. Please let me through."
"No."
"I want to get past."
"Or what?"
"Excuse me."
Jack moves to block her path. Romana tries to walk past. He moves to block that side.
"Stop that."
"Why should I?"
They repeat the odd two-step.
"It's not funny." Her voice holds the slightest tinge of irritation.
"On the contrary, it's extremely funny." The same exchange that has been heard hundreds of times in the past year.
There! The slightest spark in her eye.
"If you don't mind, I need to go to my room."
"I do mind."
"You can be so annoying." Is he imagining that undercurrent of amusement?
"Really?"
"Yes."
"I'm wounded." Jack clutches at his chest.
"Can I go past now?"
"Um…let me think about it….no!" He grins down at her. She can attack him if she likes, he just needs to get some emotion out of her.
She moves so quickly it takes him some time to work out what hit him. She takes him by surprise, shoving him hard so he stumbles and falls backwards.
He looks so funny, sitting there with his legs splayed out and a slightly stunned expression on his face. A giggle rises in her throat and soon she has collapsed next to him, crying with laughter. It feels good to laugh again.
"You're back! Romana, you're all right!" She shrieks and squirms as she always has when tickled.
The Tardis settles.
"It appears we've landed somewhere. Care to join me?"
Romana jumps up.
"I've got to get to my room!"
Jack stares up at her. She adopts an outraged posture.
"I am not going out like this!" And she runs off down the corridor, giggling as she'd believed she'd forgotten.
xxx
She skids into the console room. Jack follows slightly more sedately and breathes a small sigh of relief when he sees the room is empty. Although Romana's been shaken out of her depression, he knows the problem hasn't been resolved.
"Wait a sec, I need to check where we are."
"But it's much more fun when you don't know!" With that she yanks the door open.
Her scream is hardly audible above the rush of the wind. It sweeps through her head, reawakening memories of a similar time as the time vortex swirls in front of her. Her mind is full of disconnected images, the same images she saw aboard the past Tardis. A lady with thick dark hair, a small boy with brown hair and bright blue eyes…the boy from the dream. She tries to cling to that image and the few phrases spoken with different voices: Mayblossom, 623,999, Lydia from the library, Earth Colony…She's swept past, catching the barest glimpse of Rose. It is, it is, I've got her eyes. As her mind is overwhelmed, she screams inaudibly for the person she trusts more than anything.
xxx
The Doctor takes the scene in at a glance. Jack is clinging to the console as the winds of time roar through the console room. Romana is standing in the doorway, strangely unaffected by the force that is threatening to blow Jack off his feet. If it wasn't for her screaming in his head, she would almost seem serene.
Jack stares at Romana. Her hair is falling around her shoulders and the scarf does not stir. Yet he can hardly stand against the buffeting winds. And just above her shoulder, the bright vortex beckons alluringly…
Jack jumps at the hand on his shoulder.
"Don't look at it," the Doctor mouths.
Jack nods his understanding and wrenches his wandering gaze away.
The Doctor approaches across the console room slowly. He's not completely unaffected, his hair is blown back and his eyes are watering. He's not sure whether that's the wind though.
Crouching beside her, he allows himself to look upon the splendour of time.
"Look out there, what do you see?" His voice is quiet, but perfectly audible. He can hear the wind, but it seems muffled and faraway.
She leans into him, her mind clearing, and he wraps an arm around her.
"Lots," she murmurs wonderingly. "It's so big. It's beautiful."
"That's the true inheritance of the Time Lords. That is what we were supposed to be," he pauses as they stare out. "The Time Lords lost sight of that. With power comes responsibility, but they were scared of that responsibility. Frightened to act in case they did the wrong thing. So scared of change," he unconsciously quotes. "I was the complete opposite. As if someone was trying to balance it out. The unevenness killed them. My recklessness started the war; their reluctance to act doomed them."
She twists in his arms to look at him. "Time has no lord or master, Time Lord."
A medley of emotions play across his face before he hugs her tightly and laughs against her hair.
"The High Council were pompous prats. You'd have done them the world of good. That is, if they didn't suffer double heart attacks at the idea of you. I…"
"Dadtor…"
He's missed the sound of that word.
"We're about to fall out of the Tardis."
He looks over the top of her head.
"That would not be good."
"Is that an understatement?"
"Have I ever understated anything?"
"Yes."
And together, they stand up, turn their backs on the vortex and close the doors.
I neglected to thank all the lovely reviewers. I am a horrible person who does not deserve any reviews. That doesn't mean I wouldn't want them.