Movie two
Triassic Park
Swing123: I recommend that you read the first chapter, The Day After the Day After Tomorrow before you read this.
"OK!" Calvin said after they had watched Jurassic Park. "lets get started!"
"Do we have to?" asked Hobbes.
"Hobbes! Stop muttering!"
"I said, half to you."
Calvin stared at him.
"Hobbes, if you can't talk sense, then just shut up!"
"Yes, your idiotic highness."
"Hobbes, you're muttering, again!"
"I said..."
"HOBBES WE DON'T HAVE TIME FOR THIS! JUST DO THE STUPID PARTS!"
Hobbes sighed, as Calvin ran into the house.
Hobbes stood in the grass, till Calvin came rushing back.
"I don't believe it!" he said. "dad doesn't have any fiendish, and devilish cages in his room! Now THAT is surprising!"
Hobbes blinked.
Calvin thought for a moment.
"We'll need some kind of cage replacement. But what?"
Calvin's eyes brightened.
"THAT'S IT!"
Calvin rushed into the tool shed. He came out with a...
"a cat carrier?" said Hobbes "are you insane?"
Calvin ignored him.
"Ok," he said. "this will be the cage that the dinosaur's in, and the house will be TRIASSIC PARK, where, the slaves are trying to put it."
"Slaves?" asked Hobbes.
"Come on!" said Calvin. "You want this to dramatic don't you?"
"Who said that?" asked Hobbes.
Calvin rolled his eyes, and started his play.
TRIASSIC PARK
scene one: velo-raptor... what are they called? Ugh! RAPTOR attacks idiot slave.
Calvin the boy-genius, watches over his slaves as they push a huge cage into the gates.
Leading to... TRIASSIC PARK!
Hobbes the slave, pushes the cage with all his might.
"Calvin!" yelled Hobbes the slave. "Those people weren't PUSHING this thing! They used a bunch of techno-stuff!"
"STICK TO THE SCRIPT!" Calvin the boy-genius said.
Hobbes the slave rolled his eyes, and continued pushing on the cage.
Inside, something was staring at Hobbes the slave with evil eyes.
Hobbes the slave didn't notice.
Just when they thought they had the cage in the park, the raptor leaped into the air, and jumped against the cages!
Hobbes the slave stared at it.
"You put a stuffed dinosaur in here?" he asked.
"THAT'S NOT A STUFFED DINOSAUR!" yelled Calvin the boy-genius. "THAT'S A VICIOUS RAPTOR! NOW ACT SCARED!"
"Help me." said Hobbes the slave, as the raptor stuck it's terrible jaws out the cage.
Hobbes the slave stared at it in horror.
Ok, maybe not horror.
It was more of a bored look, but it was terrified bored look!
Hobbes the slave pushed the giant cage to the doorway.
"Open the outer doors!" commanded Calvin the boy genius.
Hobbes the slave sighed, and climbed onto the top of the cage.
He pulled with all his might, and began to lift the door.
The raptor's head shot around, and he rushed for the exit.
Only, he was a bit to fast for Mr Slowpoke "can't get the cage opened".
The raptor's head collided with the half open door.
The cage flew away from the Triassic Park, and Hobbes the slave tripped, and collapsed to the ground, the cage door still open.
The raptor, eager for revenge against the slowpoke who almost gave him brain damage, stuck it's head and grabbed hold of Hobbes' the slave's foot!
Several slaves tried to slam the door shut while others used hot shots to zap the raptor through the cage.
Their attempts were futile!
Screams of the raptor echoed through the night.
Then, Hobbes the slave was pulled into the cage and...
RIIIP!
"Aaaa. Help me."
"GRRRRROWL!"
END OF SCENE ONE OF TRIASSIC PARK
"yup." said Calvin. "That was a good scene."
"Now then." said Hobbes pulling his foot out of the carrier.
"Are we going to play as Dr Grant, and show the smart elec kid what raptors can do?"
Hobbes was expecting this answer.
"ARE YOU KIDDING? NO! WE JUMP TO THE THRILLING DINOSAUR PARTS!"
Hobbes sighed.
"Ok... now then, was it the tar spitting dinosaur that came first, or was it T. Rex?"
"Well," said Calvin a little unsure. "T. Rex is king, so he's goes first!"
"Hmmm." said Hobbes. "As I recall, TR knocked the entire car over. How are we gonna do that?" "
Don't worry Hobbes, I have it all under control." said Calvin.
"I can't believe I said that." sighed Hobbes.
TRIASSIC PARK
scene two: TR knocks car over.
Calvin the tourist stared down at his cup of water.
The water in it was making ripples as a huge pair footsteps closed in on them.
Calvin the tourist looked over at the other car where Hobbes the little kid was in.
The footsteps grew louder and louder AND LOUDER...
Then stopped.
Calvin the tourist looked around.
The goat who was going to be sacrificed by the...
"sacrificed?" asked Hobbes the little kid. "Calvin, they were just feeding it to the T. Rex! They weren't sacrificing it!"
"Returning to the movie..." said Calvin the tourist glaring at Hobbes the little kid, who rolled his eyes.
The goat who was going to be sacrificed by the T. Rex was gone.
Only the chain was there.
"Hmm. Gone." said Hobbes the little kid.
Just then... A BLOODY GOAT LEG SLAMMED ONTO THE WINDOW WHERE HOBBES THE LITTLE KID WAS!
Hobbes the little kid let out a scream.
Ok, maybe it wasn't a scream. It was more of a dull groaning.
"Aaaaaaaaaaaa. Goat leg. Save me from the goat leg."
Hobbes the little kid's terror stricken eyes rolled upward. Right behind the inactive electric fence, was a huge T. Rex.
It swallowed up the goat leg... erm ... the three legged goat in one bite.
Then it's eyes fell on the car that contained Hobbes the little kid!
"Mustn't move." said Calvin the tourist in the other car. "Mustn't make a sound."
Neither of them made any kind of sound or movement.
The T. Rex started to leave when Calvin the tourist screamed.
"HOBBES! TURN ON THE STUPID LIGHT AND GET IT'S ATTENTION!"
In the other car, Hobbes the little kid stared at Calvin the tourist with a grin on his face, and he held his hand to his ear.
"YOU CAN HEAR ME PERFECTLY YOU STUPID FUZZ BALL! NOW TURN ON THE LIGHT!"
"You'll have to speak up, I'm wearing a goat." said Hobbes the little kid.
Calvin the tourist's eyes bulged.
Hobbes the little kid snickered, and pulled the light out. He shone it on the T. Rex.
It's head spun around, and fixed on the car containing Hobbes the little kid.
T. Rex started toward the car.
"Turn the light off, turn the light off." muttered Calvin the tourist.
Hobbes the little kid turned the light off.
"YOU FUZZ BALL! IGNORE ME!"
Hobbes the little kid ignored him.
"YOU STUPID MORON! TURN ON THE LIGHT!"
Hobbes the little kid ignored him.
Calvin the tourist growled with frustration as Hobbes the little kid snickered, and turned the light back on.
T. Rex walked over to the car, and stared off into the distance.
For a reason of no particular interest, The car door was open in Hobbes the little kid's car.
Hobbes the little kid reached out, and slammed the door shut.
T. Rex's eyes shot at Hobbes the little kid!
Hobbes the little kid didn't make a sound.
But Rexy had already seen him. He bent over, and stared into the car through the window.
Hobbes the little kid shone the light in his eyes, and said, "hi. How are you doing?"
Calvin the tourist slapped his forehead.
The T. Rex let out a terrible ROAR.
Hobbes the little kid was about to switch off the light when he remembered.
He looked up.
The T. Rex slammed it's face into the on the top of the car.
The glass didn't shatter, but almost squashed Hobbes the little kid.
He pushed the glass up with his hands and feet as the T. Rex attempted to get to it's candy bar... erm... Hobbes the little kid.
Then Rexy got tired of listening to Hobbes the little kid's dull groan he called a scream, he tipped the car with his nose.
It rocked at first but didn't tip over.
But then, CRASH!
The whole car toppled over.
Sending Hobbes the little kid into the mud!
T. Rex stepped onto the bottom of the car.
His weight pushed down on the car, about to squish Hobbes the little kid!
But first it wanted to attack the tire, which wasn't as chewy as it expected.
"Eek!"said a terror stricken Calvin the tourist!
Calvin the tourist grabbed flares, and jumped out of the car.
"HEY!" he yelled.
T. Rex roared.
"OVER HERE! I GOT MORE MEAT THEN THAT SKINNY TIGER!"
"Hey!" yelled Hobbes the little kid. "I have plenty of meat!"
Calvin the tourist blinked.
"Give up Rex-a-roo!"
T. Rex lunged for Calvin the tourist.
"AAAAAAAAA!" screamed Calvin the tourist.
Just then, the T. Rex screamed.
"CALVIN! WHAT HAVE YOU DONE TO MY CAR!"
Whu-oh. It appeared that something worse then a T. Rex had just entered the situation.
END OF SCENE TWO OF TRIASSIC PARK
Calvin stared into dad's angry eyes.
It appeared that he was about to go to his work. Yes, because he was dressed in his suit, held his brief case, and had his hat atop his head.
Calvin's eyes then fell on the... uh-oh...the car.
Calvin had put a carjack under the car.
He had pushed it up so high that the car... gulp... toppled over.
"IT WAS ALL HOBBES' IDEA!" Calvin screamed.
We needn't go into details.
Calvin got the worse punishment you can imagine, and Hobbes said that this 'car incident' was worse then the 'noodle incident'.
Let's leave it at that.
One month later, after Calvin's parents had cooled down, Calvin and Hobbes went outside again.
"Ok, now we can do the tar spitting dinosaur, right?" asked Hobbes.
"Right." said Calvin.
"What was it called again?" asked Hobbes.
"Hobbes, don't you know your dinosaurs? It's a Dylophosaur! DUH!"
Hobbes rolled his eyes.
"Even so, we can't use cars again. Your dad will kill you if you even SAY car." he said.
"yeah. What a bummer. That fat guy had to get into a car after he escaped Mr Dylophosaur."
TRIASSIC PARK
scene three: Dylophosaur attacks fat guy
Calvin the fat guy slammed on his breaks.
He had crashed into a inactive electric fence.
He got up, and looked around.
He saw the road right below him.
He grabbed a rope that was attached to his car, and slid down to the bottom.
He wrapped the rope around a tree, but then heard a chirping sound.
He looked behind the tree and saw Hobbes the Dylophosaur staring up at him.
Calvin the fat guy bent over, and picked up a tree branch.
"Wanna play fetch? Play fetch? Huh? Fetch?" he asked. "Look at the stick! Look! Stick, stupid! Ya wanna stick?"
He threw the stick away.
Hobbes the Dylophosaur ignored it.
"Ah, no wonder you're extinct." said Calvin the fat guy turning around. "I'm going to run you over when I come down."
Calvin the fat guy had just reached his car when he noticed that Hobbes the Dylophosaur had followed him.
He turned around.
Just then, frills shot up from the Dylophosaur's neck.
"BBLLLAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!" It yelled.
It spit a tar liquid onto Calvin the fat guy.
Some landed in his eyes.
"AAAAAAAAAA!" screamed Calvin the fat guy.
He leaped into his car, and slammed the door.
"I'm safe." he muttered.
Frills went up next to him.
Calvin the fat guy spun around.
"BBLLLAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!"
"AAAAAAAA!"
END OF SCENE THREE OF TRIASSIC PARK
"ok, now what?" asked Hobbes.
"Well, lets see here." Calvin thought. "Oh yeah! Next is the part about T. Rex chasing the car! THAT WAS COOL!"
"As long as there's dinosaurs in it. Otherwise it's boring, right?"
"What? You're muttering again!"
"Nothing." said Hobbes innocently.
TRIASSIC PARK
scene four: T. Rex goes insane next to a car
Calvin-the-greatest-boy-on-Earth and Hobbes the insane cat leap into their car as a T. Rex bursts from the undergrowth.
"RROOAAARRR!"
Calvin-the-greatest-boy-on-Earth floored it, and they zooming off as the T. Rex flew after them.
Calvin-the-greatest-boy-on-Earth shifted into 9,000th gear but...
"Calvin," said Hobbes the insane cat.
"Jeeps don't have 9,000 gears."
Calvin-the-greatest-boy-on-Earth turned and glared at Hobbes the insane cat.
"You dare oppose Calvin-the-greatest-boy-on-Earth!"
Hobbes the insane cat sighed.
At last, T. Rex began to slow, and the Jeep 4X4 zoomed away.
"How do you know it was a four by four?" asked Hobbes the insane cat.
"SHUT UP!" yelled Calvin-the-greatest-boy-on-Earth.
END OF SCENE FOUR OF TRIASSIC PARK
"ok." said Calvin. "Now that everybody but the kids and Dr Grant are back at the control room they had to do what?"
Calvin thought.
"Oh yeah! They had to get the electricity back! So they went to get it back, only the one guy had been eaten so they... ok."
Hobbes rolled his eyes.
TRIASSIC PARK
scene five: some guy got eaten by dinosaur
Calvin the hunter stared off into the bushes.
"We're being hunted." he whispered.
Hobbes the cat looked into the bushes, unworriedly into the bushes.
"I don't see any..."
"Sssshh!" Calvin the hunter spat. "Run to the control room. I got her! Go! NOW!"
Hobbes the cat walked away. And I mean at a casual pace!
Calvin the hunter strongly considered kicking that flicking tail up behind his shoulder blades, but he wanted to stick to the script.
Calvin the hunter crept into the bushes, he could see it now.
A raptor's head staring at him through a tree up ahead.
He coked his gun and pointed it at the raptor, but then... a raptor stuck it's head out of the bushes next to him, and stared at him with it's heartless yellow eyes.
"Clever girl" Calvin the hunter said, as the raptor jumped on top of him, and bit down on his neck.
END OF SCENE FIVE OF TRIASSIC PARK
Calvin sighed with relief.
"Let me tell you, Hobbes," he said. "It almost KILLED ME to say those two dreadful words!"
"What, "go now"?"
"NO!" yelled Calvin. "Clever girl! No girl is clever! That's why it pained me to say it!"
"What about SUSIE?" asked Hobbes grinning.
"SHUT... UP!" screamed Calvin. "Now, lets get back to the movie! Lets see...oooo. That's the best part!"
"You're thinking about the raptors in the kitchen, aren't you?"
"Yup." said Calvin. "Let's go get mom's pots and pans!"
"You're doomed." said Hobbes.
"Oh, and Hobbes?" said Calvin. "I want you to be SCARED TO DEATH during this scene!"
"Right something about death." said Hobbes.
TRIASSIC PARK
final scene: raptor attack!
Calvin and Hobbes sat behind the counter in the kitchen.
They were terrified.
Sort of.
The face of carnivorous dinosaur stared into the kitchen with it's heartless yellow eyes.
Calvin's teeth were clacking.
Just then, the doorknob turned, and the raptor stepped into the room.
"Eek!" squeaked Calvin.
"Eek." said Hobbes, dully.
The Raptor rose onto it's front legs, and let out a kind of cawing sound.
"CAW! CAW! CAW! CAW!"
Calvin and Hobbes held their ears.
As the call of the raptor called another into the room.
The two walked in, and with it's right leg, the second raptor kicked the door shut.
Calvin and Hobbes were trapped.
The approaching footsteps told Calvin and Hobbes the giant 6-foot raptor was coming toward them.
Calvin crouched down, on his hands and knees, and started crawling away from the two monsters.
Hobbes followed.
The raptor looked over where Calvin and Hobbes were once hiding.
Then it peeked over the corner.
Calvin and Hobbes had already rounded a corner, but the raptor saw Hobbes' tail around the bend.
Now the raptor knew that there was two sandwiches in this room, and they were desperate to get them.
One of them leaped onto the counter, knocking pots and pans in all directions.
It's keen eyes searched the area for it's meal.
It didn't see them.
Somehow, Calvin and Hobbes got separated.
Hobbes was hiding behind another counter, and Calvin was three counters away.
The raptor edged toward Hobbes.
Hobbes blinked.
He was showing absolutely NO fear!
He knew this was just a play, and he was doing his best to be un-scared!
Calvin was tempted to just leave, and leave Hobbes for the raptors, but he couldn't "disappoint his ten billion screaming fans".
So he grabbed a couple of pots, and clanged them together making a loud, CLANG! CLANG! CLANG! CLANG!
Both raptors looked up.
They then lost interest in Hobbes, and started slinking for Calvin.
Calvin crawled into a hole in the counter, and tried to pull the door down. But it didn't move.
A raptor saw him trying to get the door shut.
"SSSCRRREEEEECH!" screeched the raptor bolting for Calvin.
BONK!
Oops.
Mr raptor had mistaken Calvin's reflection for Calvin, and he had slammed head first into another counter.
Hobbes pulled a piece of paper out of his pocket marked "script", and started reading.
"'run to freezer.'" he read. "Make raptor chase you, then lock him in freezer.' Sounds easy enough."
Hobbes stood up, and walked over to the freezer.
The raptors didn't notice him.
Hobbes continued walking to the freezer, yawning, and looking at his watch.
Finally, Calvin's imagination got sick of it, and put a twig in.
SNAP.
The raptors turned around, and stared at Hobbes, as he leaned against the freezer, his arms crossed, and stared back at them.
They both started running toward him.
"HALT!" yelled Calvin.
Both raptors stopped and stared at him.
"ONLY ONE RAPTOR IS SUPPOSED TO CHASE HOBBES! THE OTHER'S GOTTA CHASE ME!"
The raptors exchanged glances.
Then one started after Calvin.
The other zoomed on after Hobbes.
Hobbes opened the freezer door.
BONK!
The raptor slammed head first into the door.
Hobbes then, kicked and shoved him into the freezer.
"My work here is done." he said, dusting his hands together.
Meanwhile, Calvin ran and screamed his head off as the raptor flew after him.
Calvin rushed into the control room.
He slammed the door, and locked it.
"Haw, haw!" Calvin screamed as the raptor slammed into the door.
"you can't get me!" he mocked. "The door's locked!"
the raptor rolled it's eyes, then slammed it's face into the glass.
CRASH!
Oops.
Calvin grabbed a steel ladder, and set it up next to the attic.
"Calvin, that wasn't an attic." called Hobbes from another room.
Calvin climbed up it, and stepped into the whatever it was.
He crawled through the "thing" till he came to a door.
He kicked it open, and crawled into... THE MAIN ROOM!
Hobbes was already there, sitting on the dino skeleton.
Calvin gingerly climbed onto it too. Just then, the two raptors jumped from the attic thing, and onto the skeleton.
Calvin screamed as the skeleton broke apart, and slammed into the ground.
Calvin jumped up.
Hobbes sat up.
Both raptors were slinking toward them.
"Did I mention that I taste horrible?" asked Calvin.
The raptors closed in.
"I'll give you indigestion! Terrible indigestion!"
The raptors closed in.
"And did I mention the heartburn? TERRIBLE heartburn! Hobbes had once bit my finger, and had heartburn for week! It's THAT bad."
"I never had heartburn when I did that." said Hobbes.
"Thanks a lot!" Calvin muttered.
Just when the raptor was about to attack... A HUGE T. REX GRABBED THE RAPTOR IN HIS MOUTH, AND GOBBLED HIM UP!
"Hooray!" yelled Calvin.
"Calvin," Hobbes warned. "That's not a T. Rex."
"What are you talking about?" asked Calvin. "That Tyrannosaur just saved our..."
"CALVIN!" screamed the Tyrannosaur. "WHAT HAVE YOU DONE TO OUR HOUSE!"
Oopsy-daisy.
END OF TRIASSIC PARK
Calvin looked all around the living room.
The ceiling was missing in some places, there were dinosaur toys, pots and pan strewn across the house, the chairs were ripped, there was stuffing all over the place, and the carpet was gone in some areas.
Uh-oh.
There stood mom in the doorway.
It appeared that she had just been outside in the warm sun, and had come in for some suntan lotion.
"IT WASN'T ME!" screamed Calvin throwing up his hands. "You see, there were these two raptors and the T. Rex... I mean, Hobbes did it! You know how he is with his claws and the carpet and... the ceiling... were all part of his devilish plot to... glup..."
Hobbes had disappeared.
Calvin's mom delivered am stern lecture to him, took his TV privileges away, told dad, dad gave Calvin another screaming lecture about house care, took his TV privileges away again, and kept him in is room for three weeks.
Calvin then got to hear Hobbes snicker about it all.
"I'll get you for this!" he said. "You just wait what and see what comes on when I get my privileges back!"
Hobbes stopped laughing.
"Oh-no." he said.
Calvin laughed
THE END
next movie: Lord of the baseball bats parody of Lord of the Rings.