Secretly

Lily Evans and James Potter have been best friends since their first year at Hogwarts. What happens when Lily discovers the one thing that has the potential to ruin their friendship? (Starts mid 6th year.)

Disclaimer: There comes a point in every fanfiction writer's life where they get sick of writing disclaimers. It's always the same old: "I don't own them." I mean really, you'd think people would understand that after a while. But no, we authors must work ceaselessly to come up with witty disclaimer after witty disclaimer, and does anyone ever stop to express gratitude for our thankless job? No, of course not. Well, you know I kid, I'm just strange like this sometimes. In conclusion, no, I don't own them.

Chapter Four

Lily and James reached the Transfiguration classroom just as Professor McGonagall was turning into the doorway. They slid past her, muttering, "Sorry." McGonagall greeted them with a stern glare and James and Lily slid into two back row seats.

Lily noticed an empty seat in the room. Taking a quick look around the class, she noticed that Sirius was the one missing. James had noticed too. "Where is Sirius?" she mouthed to him.

"I don't know." James shrugged, then looked up to see Professor McGonagall hovering over him.

"Something you would like to share with all of us, Mr. Potter? Something more interesting than the lesson I was beginning?" James shook his head. "Well, although you may be one of my top students, you still need to pay attention in my class. Otherwise you may as well take a leaf out of Mr. Black's book and not come to class at all. Do you understand me?" James nodded quietly. "Good." McGonagall returned to the front of the room.

"Class, today you will be practicing what you have learned over the past two months. As you should all know, your next practical examination is in two weeks, and some of you," she glanced around the room at Lily and a few other students from Gryffindor and Ravenclaw," need the practice. You may choose your own partners, but please choose wisely. There are various items provided on the back table for you to transfigure. Begin." McGonagall finished instructing the class and sat at her desk to do paperwork.

Lily and James moved closer to each other in order to work together. "Hey, Lils, look." James transfigured one of his quills into a white lily and handed it to her.

"Aw, thank you, James!" Lily kissed him on the cheek. "That's so sweet of you. Can you show me how you did that?" James obliged, but Lily wasn't paying attention.

"Lily, you have to watch," he said, the red blush slowly fading from his cheeks.

"Sorry, I'm just worried about Sirius," Lily confessed, her concern showing in her face.

"I know. So am I. But we can't… well, look who's here." James pointed Lily towards the door, which Sirius had just wandered through. He looked as miserable as ever.

"Mr. Black, where have you been?" McGonagall interrogated him.

"Sorry, Professor. I got lost, I forgot the time."

McGonagall eyed him warily, but decided to let Sirius go, based on the look on his face. "Very well. Please join a group to practice your transfiguration skills.

Sirius slowly made his way to the back of the class to join Lily and James.

"Hey Sirius," Lily began cautiously.

Sirius responded with a robotic wave. "Hey Lilikins." He feigned a light mood, but Lily and James saw right through it. Sirius then simply sat there staring at a random point on the wall.

"Sirius, are you okay?" After a minute with no reply, Lily waved her hand in front of his face. Sirius snapped out of his reverie.

"Oh, hi, Lilikins," Sirius repeated wearily.

"Maybe we should just let him be," James whispered to Lily.

Lily glanced worriedly at Sirius once more. "Yeah, I guess you're right. I just wish there was something we could do. I feel so bad for him. You can tell how sad he is just by looking at him. Even McGonagall could tell."

"It seems like Bella really has gotten to him. Sirius has never been this broken up over a girl. It's usually the other way around," James said with a grim smile.

"Well, I'm going to ask Bella what's happening," Lily decided. "I can't stand seeing him like this."

Transfiguration ended without another word from Sirius, and after dismissing everyone else, Professor McGonagall called him to the front of class. "Mr. Black," she began. "Why were you so late to class today?"

"I lost track of time-"

McGonagall cut him off. "That's what you told me earlier. However, I'm not inclined to believe your story. Now," she continued, "I want you to go straight to the hospital wing to consult Madame Pomfrey about your condition. You look terribly ill."

"But-" Sirius opened his mouth in protest and was interrupted by McGonagall once more.

"Now, Mr. Black, or I shall have to escort you." At this Sirius gave in and walked out the door and toward the hospital wing. Halfway there, he stopped and turned back in the direction of Gryffindor Tower.

When Sirius stepped through the portrait hole, he glanced around the room. Spying Lily talking to Bella, he quickly crossed the room and took the stairs up to his dormitory. James saw him and quickly followed suit.

As he walked through the door, James saw that the curtains of Sirius' bed had been hastily pulled shut. James made his way over to the bed and pulled the curtains open. "Oy! Sirius!" Sirius looked up. "Hey, mate, do you want to tell me what's going on? You're completely different. Today in Transfiguration you barely said two words, didn't pull any pranks, and you didn't laugh at Peter's lack of skill once." As an afterthought, he added, "Does this have anything to do with Bella?"

"Yes!" Sirius exclaimed with exasperation. "Yes, it has everything to do with Bella, did you think that I wouldn't know what Lily and her are talking about?" he ranted. His voice softened. "She won't take a chance with me, James. She doesn't think it's worth the risk."

"Maybe she just isn't sure yet. I'm sure she'll come around," James attempted to encourage his friend. "You can ask Lily later."

"Okay," Sirius agreed glumly.

"Now, I've been thinking of what we can do with our latest joke supplies…" James grinned.

Meanwhile, Lily was still talking to Bella in the common room. "What did you tell him?" Lily asked.

"I told him that I didn't want to risk our friendship. And I don't want to lose that, Lily, I wouldn't be able to handle it if we had to stop being friends."

"But?" Lily prompted her.

"But I can't help the way that I feel for him, because I feel the same way that he does. I just don't want to go wrong with him. I don't want to be just another one of Sirius Black's ex-girlfriends." Bella poured her heart out to Lily. "You know what I mean. He hasn't had a lasting relationship at all in the six years I have known him."

"Maybe because it wasn't the right person. Sirius never had a real connection with any of those girls. He loves you, Bella. You can see it in his eyes, in the way he looks at you," Lily told her. "You have what half the girls in this school want. Don't throw it away." Bella nodded. "Besides, you really don't want half of the female population at Hogwarts to attack you for hurting their precious Sirius," Lily joked.

Bella laughed. "No. but I want to do this now. For me, for both of us. It really does seem right, I'm just afraid of what could go wrong."

"Don't be, Bella," advised Lily. "Don't focus on bad things. Only the good. I have to go talk to James now, I'll see you later."

"Okay, bye Lily. And thanks." Bella smiled at her, then went up to the girls' room. Lily walked the opposite way over to the boys' side.

"James!" Lily called out, knocking on the door of the boys' dorm. She had been knocking for over two minutes. "James! Open the damn door!" Lily finally lost her patience and gave into her temper. After all, she was doing this for Sirius, not herself. "Okay, fine, I'm coming in now." She warned.

Lily barged in through the door only to see that James and Sirius had been in the room the entire time. "James!" Lily exclaimed, exasperated. "Why didn't you answer the door?"

"Sorry, Lils," he said. "But we were discussing pranks."

"Yeah, we figured you would come in eventually," Sirius told her innocently.

Lily rolled her eyes. "The things I do for you guys… Anyway, Sirius, I know you saw me talking to Bella earlier." Sirius nodded. "Well, this is what she said…"

AN: So, I was listening to a tape the other day, and when I played it backwards, it (strangely enough) translated to "Kill Peter Pettigrew. Die, evil bastard, die!" Well, not really, but hey, a girl can dream.

Okay, there's your chapter four, I hope you liked it!!! Please review and tell me what you thought. Thanks so much to everyone who has been reading and reviewing this story, and special special thanks to the people who added me to their favorites!!! I love you guys! More soon….. Bye!