A/N: Hey! Oh my god, you guys, I only got eight reviews. :( Sigh. Oh well. I think I like this chapter the best so far, I dunno why. Anyway, a special thanks to lucid-03-days for reviewing twice, and also to CatherineMcq, Banoffee, MotherCrumpet, LilJester, shadow929, sarcastic spastic for reviewing, let's see if I can get more…? Lol. And happy almost Australia Day… to anyone out there who lives in Australia.
October 6th (later)
Okay. So I totally didn't mean it. Like, with the dementors and all, sucking the happiness out of our poor, already-shrivelled-and-mangled souls, it was freezing. Fucking freezing.
And I guess I was, you know, shivering so much I couldn't think straight (like I can anyway) and just… knocked the poor bloke for a sixer. Plus one.
The truth is, I knocked Cedric Diggory out cold, and he then just HAPPENED to fall in the ice-cold, so-fricking-cold-it-could-freeze-your-light-bulb-and-crack-it cold lake.
I mean, it wasn't ENTIRELY my fault. So yeah, a wack on the head and he was out like a light. (Seriously. I mean, he's a Quidditch player. You'd think he'd have a little more GALL. But apparently not.)
It was all Lee's fault. Yeah, I know what you're thinking- just because I'm pissed at him doesn't mean I should accuse him of trying to kill a classmate, right?
Well. Maybe not. But it was his fault anyway. Me and Cedric were having a perfectly nice (if effing freezing and muddy) stroll around the picturesque lake. Well, I was strolling. Rather fast, actually. And when Cedric had to run to keep up with me, I was shivering so much that when I saw what I thought was Lee up ahead, I thew my arms up and hit him in the face. If it wasn't so sad it would be funny.
It turned out to be a tree, though. I mean, of COURSE Lee wasn't spying on me with Cedric. Who would even DO such a thing?
Anyway, Cedric fell in the lake and when I helped pull him out his face was blue. And I was like, 'Are you okay?' and he goes, 'Are you cold? Do you want my jacket?'
See what I mean? He's just so NICE. And so I told him that I didn't want his jacket, on account of it being wet and all, but then he looked sad. So I took the stupid jacket. AND I even put it on to make him happy. Because since he was being so nice, I figured I could learn a thing or two from such a nice person. And so you know where that got me?
Yeah, that'd be the hospital wing. And for some reason, all these second years were playing some sort of game and broke all their bones. So she has this great long line of broken-boned people to attend to while I am sniffling and sneezing and wheezing all the way over here.
So maybe Cedric has it a little worse, seeing as how ALL his clothes are wet. But he's still being so nice about it. I apologised for punching him into the lake, and he's all, 'Don't worry about it, Katie. Anytime.'
That was what he said. And I quote, 'Anytime.' I'm already planning another expedition around the lake…
Only kidding. I wish someone would come and visit me. I'm starting to feel lonesome, because all the little second years that have their little fractures fixed are coming up and going, "Oh my god! Are you REALLY Cedric Diggory? Can I touch you?" I mean, who knew twelve-year-olds even THOUGHT that way?
I know I didn't. I was so innocent… an innocence that was swept away by Fred and George as soon as I turned thirteen. Well okay, maybe it was swept away before that, but still.
"Katie! Are you okay?" ah, speaking of my little fan club, here they come…
"Well," I say, grimacing. "I'm feeling a little sick." I let out a couple of fake coughs for good measure.
"Oh, you poor thing!" That's Alicia for you, always the mother hen. "What happened?"
"Well, I say weakly, "It's a long story…" My voice trails off pathetically.
"We have a while," Angelina says, sitting down roughly on my bed.
"It all started when I went for a walk around the lake," I began.
"The lake? As in the school lake? In the freezing cold?" Angelina interrupts.
"Yeah," I whine. "And I thought I saw… um, a tree, and so I threw up my hands to say, 'Oh my god, what a pretty tree!', except I accidentally hit Cedric- did I mention he was my walking buddy?- and he kinda went unconscious and fell in the lake."
"Oh my god!" Alicia yells. "Is he dead?"
I stare at her for a moment, before she contains herself and sits back down on the bed calmly. "No," I say in a duh-if-he-was-don't-you-think-I'd-be-in-Azkaban-with-all-the-other-murderers-and-lolly-stealing-people? Kind of voice. "It was okay, 'cause the cold water woke him up so he didn't drown or anything. But then he asked if I was cold, and gave me his coat, and when I said I didn't want it he insisted and so I put it on and now I'm sick and stuck waiting for Madame Pomfry to finish with all the little midget second years who are so stupid they think that if you jump off the roof without a broom they can still fly because they're magic." I say really fast. Well, I think that's what the second years were doing. I'm not too sure.
"That is so sweet!" Alicia shouts shrilly, clapping her hands and looking all lovey-dovey.
Ange and I exchange glances. "Aren't you in love with George?" I remind her.
"Yeah, but- hey! That was a dirty trick," she exclaims. Ange and I have been trying for ages to get her to admit her feelings for George, but I've never actually tried asking her directly. Sigh. How stupid and idiotic we are…
I shrug nonchalantly. "Too bad."
"Anyway," Angelina interrupts. I've really got to get her out of the interrupting habit. It's driving me insane, just like Alicia's finger pointing habit. And my talking-before thinking habit. That annoys me too. And Lee's asking girls out but not actually waiting for an answer habit. That really pisses me off. And Fred's-
"We all know Katie secretly pines for-" Drum roll- "Lee," she finishes, ignoring my oh-my-god-you-didn't-just-say-that look. "Well, everyone except Katie and Lee."
"I didn't," Alicia points out, throwing Ange's theory out the window.
"Yeah," I say smugly. "She's the smart one. How come she didn't know? Huh? Huh? Huh?" Alicia gives me a weird look.
"Because," Ange says simply, "she has no clue when it comes to love."
? And Ange does? This, coming from a girl who JUST YESTERDAY was crying that one of her best friends, aka Fred Weasley, aka Angelina Johnson's soulmate, basically told her that he liked her and she was too thick to notice.
"Hello?" Alicia says. "I am right here, in case you haven't noticed."
Yeah, we did. We just like to ignore her. We talk twice as much and twice as loud as 'Lic, so sometimes it's hard to hear what she's saying, on account of how our eardrums are ringing because me and Ange keep having to raise our voices so we can be heard over each other's raising voices.
"Hang on!" I scream so loud that everyone in the entire Hospital Wing turns to look at me, including Cedric who's politely gone over to chat to the second years so we can have a 'private' conversation. "DID YOU JUST SAY I'M PINING FOR LEE JORDAN?"
"Yeah." Angelina says, taking my little screaming match and the fact that I'm trying to belt her over the head with a pillow in stride, "except you forgot to mention 'secretly'. Although, seeing as how everyone can tell except for Lee and Alicia-"
"I AM NOT SECRETLY PINING FOR LEE JORDAN!" I bellow. "And if you ever mention that stupid-head's name ever again, I will personally have to write a Howler from you to Snape, saying how much you love him and want to have his babies!"
"Stupid-head?" Alicia asks nobody in particular. "Harsh."
"You wouldn't!" Angelina yells back at the same time.
I giver her a Look. "Oh yes, I would!"
"No you wouldn't!"
"Will too!"
"Will not!"
"Will too!"
"Will-"
"Shut up!" Alicia shouts, pointing first at me, then Ange. It's that pointy thing again. I really need to train her out of that… maybe if I give her a couple of Schmackos…
"It's true," I mutter sullenly.
"Is not!"
"Is too!"
"For god's sake, SHUT UP!" Alicia screams so loud that there is silence. Everyone in the Hospital Wing is looking at us like we're an exciting mid-day soap on TV. Even Madame Pomfry, who's looking from Angelina to me, to Alicia and then back again. And this kid who stalks Harry, I think his name is Connie Cretin, is taking photos of us. I pose for one, throwing my hands up dramatically and pointing to Angelina, mouthing, 'wanker'.
Ange sees and starts pointing to me mouthing, 'reject'. Pretty soon, we're both trying to mouth as many words as possible, while Connie Cretin just keeps taking shot after shot after shot.
"They're both losers," Alicia sighs to the camera dramatically, turning us away and forcing our arms to go around each other's neck. "Now kiss and make up."
"Okay," I say cheerfully, giving Ange a big bear hug. "Do we get an afternoon nap now?"
"What?" Alicia asks distractedly, totally missing my sarcasm.
"I... get… it…" The Connie Cretin dude is laughing hysterically, practically rolling around on the floor with tears in his eyes. Some kids should just stay home-schooled…
I roll my eyes, and Ange and Alicia nod in agreement. "You know what," I say conversationally to Ange, with everyone in the room leaning in to hear, because I've lowered my voice considerably.
"What?" Ange and Alicia ask curiously.
I ignore 'Lic. "Do you remember why I'm in here?"
"Yeah…"
"And why the second years are in here?"
"Yeah…"
"And the fact that I haven't got cured yet?"
"Yeah…. Wait! You just hugged me! And Alicia bumped our heads together!"
I smile, glad that Angelina's not as dumb as she makes out to be, especially in the areas of love and one Mr. Fred Weasley.
"But that means I'm going to get sick too!" Ange wails.
I shrug. "Yeah."
"But it's Quidditch next month!"
Seriously. That is what she said. Sometimes I cannot believe my friends are my friends. I mean, with a little more effort and planning, I could have made friends that don't have one track minds or are so oblivious to their soulmates.
"Ange," I say, "Colds don't last a month."
"Especially when you can just get a pepper-up potion," Alicia chimes in a 'duh!' sort of voice.
Ange glowers at her. "I knew that," she says, sounding irritated. Then, in one fluid movement, she jumps up and grabs Alicia in a bear hug, 'accidentally' sneezing over her shoulder. Gryffindors can be so evil sometimes.
"Angelina!" Alicia shrieks, jumping up and down amid snickers from some mean little midgets and me. "I hate you! How could you do this to me! What about exams?"
"Alicia," I say in an understanding tone, "Exams aren't until June." Ange laughs in a very mean, non-best-friend way. So do I.
"So?" she yells. "I won't be able to study!"
I realise then that I haven't actually been sneezing, wheezing or coughing during this entire little 'drama'. "Hey guys," I begin.
"I won't be able to practice Quidditch!"
"I don't want to fail my exams!"
"Guys!" I yell, putting both of fingers in my mouth intending to do an ear-splitting whistle. What comes out is more like the sound that emits from a balloon when you let all the air run out.
It works, though, because everybody stops doing what they were doing and turns and stares at me before bursting into tear-inducing laughter. Not very funny. "I don't think I'm sick!" I announce, expecting everyone to shout 'Hooray!' like they did in this movie I saw at Alicia's place one time.
Instead, everyone shuts up and Alicia and Ange look up from their hands. "What?" Ange whispers hoarsely.
"I said, I don't think I'm sick," I repeat.
"You little-" Ange jumps up and for one horrible second I think she's trying to kill me. But it's okay; she grabs me and hugs me so tight that I feel like I will explode.
"Yay!" Alicia yells in delight, and grabs me and Ange and hugs us both. We all sit back down on the bed and I ask them something that I had been wondering about the whole time.
"How did you guys know I was here?" I ask confusedly. I mean, they're great best friends but it's not like we have ESP or anything.
"We didn't," Alicia replies.
"Lee's in the Hospital Wing, too. Fred and George are with him. I think he fell out of a tree. In fact-" Ange stands up and pulls apart the curtain to reveal three figures, grinning sheepishly and then bursting into loud laughter.
Keel me. Please.
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