Title: Twisted Tale
By: Tsuneni2Nocis
Summary: What happens when a muggle matchmaker is sought out by Dumbledore to bring house unity? Insanity, timetravel, closeness...and pissed off characters. hehehe...let the madness begin! R&R Parings: HG/DM, BZ/GW, RW/PP, HP/LB
Disclaimer: I'll admit it, The Harry Potter characters ARE mine. Yup- I am J.K Rowling. Ha-ha-and then I woke up from this dream and realized I wasn't. So, not mine- Doesn't mean I can't borrow them and use them to preform my evil tricks on them though. Hehehe...this should be fun!
Chapter 3:
Deisi arrived at the Great Hall and Professor McGonagall came rushing towards her.
"There you are Ms. Acevedo. You're next in line to be sorted, Dumbledore and the rest of the Professors are waiting for you. Go on up to the stool."
Deisi made her way to the stool on which the sorting hat was in. Professor McGonagall raised the hat and put it on her head; the Great Hall was silent. (A/n: Since this is my story I'm gonna do something completely different for which house she gets sorted in. It'll go along with my plot more easily and stuff...)
Hmm...you're cunning, Ms. Acevedo. Have bravery, ambition, loyalty, a good head on your shoulders..you shall be in...
"Slytherin!" The Slytherin house erupted in cheers and Deisi smiled. The sorting hat wasn't done yet though.
"And Griffindor!"
The clapping stopped and the Great Hall grew silent. Whispers soon began to spread and Deisi looked questioningly at the Sorting Hat.
I'm in WHAT! Oh, great. First day here and I'm already the odd one...not that it's bad or anything, I mean being different is a good thing, right?
Deisi groaned as she realized she was talking to herself, again. She then looked at the sorting hat.
"How's this possible? I thought you could only be sorted into one house, not two! This must be a mistake...isn't it?" She demanded.
"I make no mistakes, you are in both those houses, now let me rest. I have to think of my next rhyme for next time...leave!" The sorting hat fumed.
Great now the sorting hat hates me, ugh- how can things get any worse?
Deisi heard shouting behind her suddenly and she turned around. The Griffindors were now shouting to the Slytherins, while the Slytherins shouted at the Griffindors.
"She can't be in both!" Draco and Hermione implored.
"Of course not, she's in Griffindor! Not some stupid house like yours!" Ron tried to get out.
"What! She's in Slytherin!" Pansy screeched.
"No! Griffindor!" Harry confirmed.
"Slytherin!" Blaise shouted.
"Griffindor!" Lavender mimicked.
"Slytherin!" Draco yelled, again.
"Argh-" Now all the Griffindors were raging mad.
"Grr-" The slytherins approached all the Griffindors.
I just HAD to say that didn't I?
The Proffessors just stood watching the whole scene with interest and then something happened that had Deisi laughing. Ron had thrown a Pumkin pie and it hit Pansy straight in the face. It slowly fell away from her face, she was now covered in whiped cream.
"Why you-" Without another word she got a turkey leg and threw it, hitting him on the cheek. He staggered back and everyone began to grab food.
"FOOD FIGHT!"
The Great Hall was in chaos and everyone was throwing food. Deisi went behind a table, narrowly missing being splattered with smashed potatoes. Hermione was now pouring juice on Draco's head while he grabbed some cherries. Hermione blinked and the next thing Deisi knew he grabbed her shirt and poured the bowl down the front.
Hermione began to scream murder and she knocked Draco to the ground. While on top of him she began to smirk.
"You know, Malfoy, I've always liked your hair...and I'm sure you wouldn't want anything bad to happen to it, would you?" Hermione forced out, the cherries were extremely cold inside her shirt, and they were squishy! She hated squishy things...not counting her stuffed animals though; she liked those.
"You wouldn't dare, Granger." He muttered.
His only respose was a butterbeer going towards his hair, followed closely by some jell-o.
"AHAAAAA! MY HAIR! GRAGNER YOU IDIOT! I CAN'T BELIEVE YOU DID THAT! MY PERFECT HAIR! THE HORROR!" Draco stated, his voice cracking a bit.
"Oh, get over yourself, Malfoy."
Deisi began to laugh and she ducked once again, the gravy that had been aimed at her covered Neville now. She clutched her stomach laughing at the sight. Crouching down she saw that Ginny and Blaise were throwing vast amounts of food on eachother, the other un-caring that they had chocolate, suggar and ice cream on their clothes. All they wanted to do was get the other to give up first.
"Give up, Weasley!"
"No! I'll never give up to the likes of a SLYTHERIN! Dream on!"
"Give up!"
"No!"
"Do it!"
"NOOOO!"
More food followed after wards, by the time Deisi was finished watching them Ginny was knee high in food, vise-versa for Blaise. Meanwhile, with Harry and Laveder...
Lavender and Harry were back to back, their arms full of syrup and other weapons that they might be able to use. Slytherins were coming towards them from all the sides, they were covered by every type of food.
"Go for the ones in front of you, Lavender, I'll take care of the rest."
"Alright, Harry."
The slytherins punced on Lavender but she managed to dance away. She grabbed a bottle of chocolate and strawberry syrup and sprayed the Slytherins with it. Goyle, who she had hit, looked down at his shirt and noticed it was red. He dropped to the ground, whimpering.
"She got me! She got me! I'm gonna die now, I've been shot! Ahaaaa!" Goyle kept on squirming on the ground, then he stopped as if he had just seen someone in front of him. "Aunt Manilda? Is that you? Yes, I am coming home soon...yes, I am."
Lavender stared at the Slytherin incrediously and then poured some more syrup on him. The next instant he was 'dead'.
"Alright, then."
Harry was still behind Lavender and fought off two Slytherins. He covered them in prune juice. They screamed, and backed away.
"It burns!" The prune juice, acted as Holy Water for Harry and he continued to pour it on them. They left, crying their heads off.
Lavender and Harry hugged each other because of their victory and realized what they were doing.
"Get the hell away from me, Brown!"
"I wasn't the one who got close to me!"
"Arg-"
"Grr-"
The two Giffindors continued bickering with eachother, until two identical pies were sent towards their heads, then they began to fight again.
The Great Hall was in chaos and the Professors still din't do anything. They were actually cheering for the house they wanted to win, and were betting on the outcome.
After an hour the students began to drop like flies and soon they were all panting on the ground. Deisi munched on some chicken pieces with gravy and some smashed potatoes as the last student fell.
Dumbledore then stood up and looked around, everyone was to tired and so they listened. Not even the slytherins complained.
"Now, the sorting hat had decided and Ms. Acevedo will be in two houses. Now that you're all done with your childish games you can get to cleaning the Great Hall."
Every student moaned and soon they started verbally fighting.
"This is all YOUR fault!"
"No, yours!"
A pie soon followed and everything started all over again.
The Next Day
After the insanity of the next day, and Deisi getting sorted in two separate houses, the first day of classes began. Deisi had conducted the first part of her plan yesterday, while in the Head's dormitory; after helping to supervise the clean-up. She was to stay with Draco and Hermione, who was Head Girl, until they could fully solve the problem of where she was to stay.
After getting a quick breakfast in the Great hall she gathered her books and made her way to her Potion's class, which she purposely came an hour early to. She spotted a dark figure with greasy black hair and a frown upon his face; he was Professor Snape.
"Hello Professor." Professor Snape looked up from the piece of parchment he was looking over and simply looked at Deisi.
"Ahem- I presume you know why I came to this school already?"
"Yes, I do know. Why?"
Deisi smiled, letting the Slytherin part of her come out.
"Well, you see Professor I need you to make some students do a particular potion..."
The bell rang signaling for the students to go to their first class. The golden trio came into the dungeons, ready to face Snape. The Professor they most despised. Deisi sat towards the back of the classroom and observed the three Griffindors. Soon Draco, Pansy and Blaise came into the room and sat away from the Griffindors.
Professor Snape came into the room, his robes billowing before him. The room was completely silent and Deisi saw Neville, a Griffindor, cower as Snape's gaze roamed over him.
"Today we are to make a potion, not just any potion; the potion of Nocis. Can anyone tell me what this potion can do?" Snape surveyed the room and didn't even glance at Hermione, who was waving frantically, trying to answer the question.
"No, then? Very well..." Hermione blew out a sigh of frustration. Snape's eyes focused on her and he smiled maliciously.
"Five point from Griffindor for unnecessary frustration."
"What!" Ron, Harry and Hermione yelled.
Snape smirked, "ten more points from Griffindor for unnecessary anger towards un fair deduction of points, each. Now, sit down!"
Anger showed in the three Griffindor's faces and Deisi saw the Slytherins try to hide, unsuccessfully, laughter. Of course, Snape didn't say anything.
"Now, as I was saying. The Potion of Nocis is used to conjure good karma, or luck. It was a brilliant potion that a student came up with thirteen years ago. Today you are to conduct this potion. I will partner you up." Snape smirked as the students turned white as sheets.
"Granger you're with Mr. Malfoy."
"What!" Identical looks and words of outrage came out from Draco and Hermione. Deisi chuckled.
"Five points from both of you for outrage over your parteners, now get to work!"
Snape continued to say the pairs of people and Hermione went over towards Draco.
"You better not touch me, Granger. You might get my new robes filthy."
"Don't flatter yourself, Malfoy. Not only do I NOT want to touch you, I also don't want to tarnish my hands with YOUR filth. Ferret Face."
Deisi bit back a smile, she was behind Draco and Hermione, Ron had been partnered up with her. Snape had given the pair of them a list of ingredients to put in the potion. A list she had purposely designed to fit in with her plan, to get them together. And boy are they going to be shocked once they find out what happened.
Hermione didn't even notice that she was putting in the ingredients for another potion, not the Potion of Nocis. She was that angry right now. Draco on the other hand, was working silently, once in a while making a rude comment, which Hermione tried to ignore, though it was hard.
Deisi saw that Hermione had now some rosemarry on her hand and turned to Ron.
"Ron, we need some more Dragon's blood...let's go get some more, okay?" Ron nodded and they walked to where the ingredients were now located at. Deisi turned around in time to see that Hermione was putting in the rosemarry. One, two and thr-
Boom!
The potion exploded and covered Hermione and Draco from head to toe. There was an enormous amount of potion around Deisi's and Ron's work station. Thank goodness I moved out of the way in time. I REALLY don't want to be where they will end up being. Hehehe...can't wait until class is over.
Author's Note: Dontcha want to know where Hermione and Draco went? Hehehe- so do I. Anyways, next chapter you'll find out. Hmm...lol. I don't really think you guy like reviewing stories, I'm more than happy though since you've been adding me to your favorite stories thing! Please review too, though! I'd say I'll post a new chapter every three days or so...depending on the reviews I get! So...click the button below!
-Tsuneni2Nocis