Author's Note: I swear the next story I write is going to involve rainbows and bunnies and fluff and happiness. Sorry for the outburst, the angst is getting to me a little. I really like this story … its just, when I get into the heads of the characters I get sad.
Disclaimer: Dick Wolf owns. I borrow. I play nice. No one sues me. Right? Right.
Title: Keeping It Together
By: Marion
Chapter: 4The first person Alex called was not Danny Ross but Jimmy Deakins. He was outside but his wife Angie answered the phone. "Hello?"
"Angie, hi. This is Alex Eames."
"Oh, hi Alex. Happy Thanksgiving," said Angie. "How are you?"
"I'm all right," said Alex. "But I wanted to let Captain Deakins know that Bobby's mom passed away this morning."
"Oh no. How's he doing?"
"He's taking it pretty hard. She was all he had. I'm up at Carmel Ridge with him."
"When is the service?" asked Angie.
"I'm not sure yet," said Alex. "Bobby is making arrangements for her now."
"Please call us and let us know. We'll be there. Tell Bobby to call us if he needs anything."
"I will. Thank you, Angie."
When she hung up the phone she took a deep breath and called her current captain.
"Ross," he answered. He sounded none too thrilled to be disturbed on the holiday.
"Captain, this is Alex Eames. I called to tell you that Bobby's mother died this morning."
"That's awful," he said sympathetically. "Thank you for calling me. How's he taking it?"
"Hard. But he'll be okay. I'm with him now."
"If either of you need anything, let me know."
"We might need a few days off, sir. I'm not sure when the service will be, if there is one."
"I understand Bobby needing some time off," said Ross. "But I should be curious why you also need time off."
She missed the slight trace of humor in his voice. Pursing her lips in irritation, she sighed. "I'm not going to leave Bobby alone. He doesn't have anybody else."
"I'll see you both a week from Monday," he said, surprising her.
"Thank you," she said in disbelief.
"Don't sound so shocked, Eames. I find your devotion to Goren admirable. And I know he is equally devoted to you. Let me know when the service is, okay?"
"I will," she said, still a little off balance. "Goodbye."
xxx
"Mr. Goren, we have all of your mother's paperwork right here," said the nurse. "Would you like to see her?"
Bobby looked apprehensive. "They haven't taken her brain yet?" he asked.
"No. The research team will be by tomorrow to do that," she told him gently. "For now she's in the morgue. After the operation we'll contact the crematory."
Goren wrung his hands. He and his mother had talked about this. It was all preplanned. She wanted her brain to go for research on schizophrenia. And she wanted to be cremated, her ashes scattered beside the turtle pond next to Belvedere Castle in Central Park. Bobby made a decision.
"I-I would like to see her," he said softly. The nurse led him toward the morgue. There was going to be a service at the chapel there at Carmel Ridge. They'd preplanned that, too. Francis Goren had had friends at the center and among the staff. Tuesday at noon.
The nurse pulled back the sheet that covered his mother's face. Her eyes were closed and her skin was so pale. The nurse patted his arm. "I'll give you some time alone with her," she said. "The forms will be at the nurse's station for you to sign."
"Thank you," said Bobby. And then he was alone.
He stared pensively at his mother's lifeless form. "I'm sorry," he whispered. "I should have been here to hold your hand. I didn't want you to be alone."
He pulled up a chair to sit beside her in the chilled room. For the second time in as many hours, Bobby Goren cried. He buried his face in his hands. This time there was no Alex to hold him. He couldn't remember ever feeling so alone.
A short time later, when his tears had subsided, he put the chair back where it went. Slowly he reached out to caress his mother's face. Then he stroked her hair. He bent low to kiss her forehead. With agonizing slowness he replaced the sheet. Then without a backward glance he left the room.
Author's note: Thanks for reading. This chapter came easier than the last one. Reviews are always nice. Thanks again for all the encouragement you've given me for this story.