Dedication Chapter 2
Here are some more of TriggerhappyRetards ideas.
Ed: She doesn't own us dudes and dudettes!Me: Oo
Chapter 8: Crazy Pineapples-------------------------------------------------
Roy Mustang was mad. Very mad. Roy Mustang was as mad as anyone could be. Why is Roy Mustang mad? Edward had given him laxatives and flushed his gloves of course.
"Meow," cooed Ducky, eating the fake plant.
Roy gave Ducky an odd look and sat at his desk. Suddenly….
"COME PINEY! TO THE FRUIT CAVE!" yelled Edward, running into Roy's office.
"What in the name of the Fuhrer are you doing here Edward?" he asked, still mad about the previous nights escapade.
"Don't you love me anymore?" asked Ed, doing as cute face.
"Uh…." replied Roy. "Maybe?"
"Oh. Okay," said Ed, and he left the room.
"That was odd…" said Roy, as he was about to take a sip of coffee, remembered what happened last night, and decided not to.
Roy decided to go out for a bit and cool his head, but he would be in for a surprise later.
When he returned to his office, he stood, mouth wide open, staring at the floor, covered with oil.
"EDWARD" bellowed Roy, steam rising from his ears.
"What do you need sir?" asked…Piney? Oh wait. It was just Ed using a falsetto voice.
Knowing Ed wouldn't answer him in a normal tone of voice, he then replied to the pineapple, "Do you know why there's oil on the floor of my office?"
"Yes," replied 'Piney.' "We were going to freeze it to go ice skating, but it was too hot."
"The oil?" asked Roy.
"No…THE WORLD!!!!!" yelled 'Piney.'
Roy just had to go and walk around again. He left, and was muttering things about pineapples and oil, before returning again. He stood in the doorway and saw a large red box with a pink bow waiting for him on the oil-covered floor. The tag read, "Dear Colonel. Sorry I missed your birthday. I got you something. From, Piney."
He looked around and blinked. Did he just receive a birthday present from a pineapple? He shrugged his shoulders and opened the box. Five large red parrots flew out of it. He looked around for Edward and his pineapple. Little did he know, that among the bird poop, llama droppings, and oil….a small blonde and his pineapple were sneaking up behind him. As soon as he turned around, 'Piney' yelled, "NOW!" and Roy was thrown into the closet. Ed closed the door and locked it. Roy sighed and lit a candle he saw from the crack of light coming out from under the door. He examined his surroundings, like any good soldier would, and stopped when something yellow caught his eye. It was 'PINEY'! Suddenly, he felt the pineapple lunge at his face and he couldn't pull it off! Finally, the pineapple fell to the floor and rolled into the corner. Ed then unlocked the door.
"Didja kiss him Piney," Ed asked, excited for the answer.
"Yes," replied 'Piney.'
Roy sat up and said, "WHAT?"
Ed and 'Piney' looked over at him and laughed.
"What's so funny?" asked a very confused Colonel.
"YOU DIDN'T KNOW THAT PINEY IS A GIRL PINEAPPLE. DID YOU?" laughed Ed.
"No…"said Roy, still confused, and starting to get angry since he was being laughed at. Ed and Piney continued to laugh until….
"THAT'S IT!" yelled Roy, putting on his spare gloves and smirking. "I'll be having fried shrimp tonight!"
"RUN FOR IT!" yelled Ed, grabbing Piney and Ducky, heading outside. Roy Mustang then chose that moment to snap his fingers. Yes. He forgot about the oil and snapped.
2 hours later
"May I visit Colonel Mustang?" Ed asked the hospital receptionist.
"Yes. Room 201 on the fifth floor," she replied.
He headed to Mustang's room and when he got there, he saw a heavily bandaged man. The only part that wasn't bandaged was his head.
"OH COLONEL! PINEY AND I APOLOGIZE!" yelled Ed, standing next to him.
"Ed? Is that you?" asked Roy, groggily.
"Yes. Yes it is," said Ed. "What's wrong with him, doc?" Ed asked the nearest doctor.
"He suffers from third degree burns and an unexplainable fear of pineapples," replied the doctor.
"I wonder where he got that," said Ed, and left, putting Piney on the table so the two of them could visit.
"How's the weather," asked Piney.
"NO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" Roy cried insanely, as Ed ran from the building.
Roy: Grr
Me: Don't blame me!
Roy: Oh? Why not? –grumble rant-
Me: …LOOK! A PINEAPPLE!
Roy: Ack! –runs away-
Ed: Too easy.