A/N I'm baahaack! Sorry it took me so long to update, but I had serious writers block, a broken computer, a vacation to take and a temp job at Mac Donalds to do... So I was a little busy, but I hope this chapter will be at least a little satisfying for now, there's more coming, inlcuding some action and tragedy... Anyways, thanks for reviewing everyone, and enjoy!

6

She put that bottle to her head and pulled the trigger
And finally drank away his memory
Life is short but this time it was bigger
Than the strength she had to get up off her knees
We found her with her face down in the pillow
Clinging to his picture for dear life

When Jesse and Martha hadn't heard from Mary nor Luke for three weeks, they started to worry. Jesse had driven by a few times the past weeks, but everything seemed fine. Except for that evening…

Martha had been fidgety all day, and after dinner Jesse decided to just check on them to be sure.

Arriving in his white pick-up he noticed the door was opened wide. That wasn't right. Mary was never that careless anymore, after three-year old Luke had wandered off one day and had been lost for two days. They were lucky enough to find him, hiding in an old Indian cave, shivering from the cold, but alive.

Stepping out of the truck, Jesse walked to the quiet house. Entering, he could already smell the foul smell of alcohol. He had noticed it before, but never this strong and stale. Seeing how the kitchen was a mess, with broken bottles everywhere, panic started to seep in his veins. Turning his head around he saw the opened bedroom door. At first, he didn't notice the two figures lying there, but after stepping closer he could see them. The sight was almost heartbreaking, as Jesse immediately saw something was wrong with Mary. Her body was too still, too white. In contrary to Luke's, whose chest was moving up an down, while he was suckling his thumb. The little boy had snuggled into his mothers chest, curling up on himself and was sleeping peacefully.

Jesse felt his heart clench as he slowly walked over to the two figures. Bending down he saw the blueness of Mary's lips and the foam which seemed to cover her chin and lips. Afraid to do so, but knowing he had to, Jesse placed his fingers against her neck, checking for a pulse.

A gasp escaped his lips as he felt nothing.

"Dear lord, please no," he whispered, stumbling back a few feet.

The scene in front of him, of the little boy, sleeping in his dead momma's arms… Of the picture her cold hand was clutching, while her other arm was limply hanging over her son, would haunt him for the rest of his life…

We laid her next to him beneath the willow
While the angels sang a whiskey lullaby

Goshdarnit, this story just ain't gonna win points in the Hazzard's happy ever after contest… I'm a wonderin what Luke 'll say bout the whole new view he got on his kin.

"We buried her next to yur daddy, an' it was like our dear lord had seen everythin that happened, cause the day we took her to her final restin place, the rainin' stopped as the clouds disappeared ta make room for the sun again…"

As uncle Jesse finished with those final words he sighed, before he turned darkened eyes to his eerily silent nephew. Seeing the blank look in those blue eyes, he knew…

By keeping all of this a secret he had ruined it. Ruined the bond he had he had with his eldest, and ruined the picture he knew Luke had of his own childhood and family. Sitting there, darkness falling around them like a heavy blanket, he saw it was also covering the eyes of the boy sitting next to him.

Jesse sighed.

"So there it is… Ya wanted ta know the truth, an' this is it. I'm sorry ya never knew this, but ya hafta know Luke, we kept it a secret for yur own good, an' I ain't sorry for keeping it that way…"

When silence was the only response Jesse got from the slumped form sitting next to him, he turned his eyes up. And after seeing the accusation in those clouded eyes, he knew Luke would probably never forgive him.

"Luke…"

"Don't."

Jesse felt his muscles tense at the raw pain and betrayal that was apparent in one single word. This would not be solved overnight. He knew that, and Luke probably did too, because he stood up, wobbling a bit, as he started walking into the darkness of the night.

"Luke…" Jesse tried once more, but he only saw the back of his nephews head, shaking as if he didn't want to know.

-o - o - o - o - o - o - o - o - o - o - o -

At the Duke farm

Bo and Daisy had been sitting at the table for hours, both picking at their food, and both refusing to go to bed.

"Ya think everythin' is alright?" Daisy asked for what seemed like the hundredth time.

Bo sighed, worry and uncertainty were battling within him, fighting for a hold on him. Looking up at his cousin, who was biting her lip at the moment, he knew they had to let Uncle Jesse deal with this one.

"Yeah, I think so, we jus' hafta wait for Uncle Jesse ta get home…"

As soon as he had spoken those words, they both heard the pickup pulling up next to the house. Their eyes met and both of them flew up, with Bo knocking his chair over as they made their way to the door.

When it opened, the first thing they saw was the top of their uncle's head. It was bowed as if he was ashamed.

"Uncle Jesse?" Daisy asked softly.

Bo wasn't as slow with words however.

"Where's Luke? Did ya find him? Is he okay? What happened?"

By the time he was done asking questions he was out of breath. But his uncle hadn't answered one of them…

He slowly made his way through the kitchen, looked up at the picture of all of them, including Luke standing in the living room, sighed and made his way to his bedroom.

Daisy and Bo exchanged worried looks, their uncle looked ten years older and walked like he was too tired to hold his own weight. They knew that he wouldn't tell them anything now, and that if there would have been something important for them to know, he would have told them before he retreated himself.

Cleaning up the dirty dishes they both went to bed with heavy hearts. Something had happened tonight, and they were clueless to what it was that made Luke stay away and Uncle Jesse to close himself off like that…

- o - o - o - o - o - o - o - o - o -

The following morning Bo was awakened for the second time in two days from a troubled sleep, by a rustling in the quiet house. Cracking open one eye, he saw that dawn was breaking, but the sun wasn't up just yet. Hearing his bedroom door open slowly he pretended to be asleep. That could only be one person… Luke.

The figure started to rummage through some dressers and the closet, and when Bo heard a bag being zipped he suddenly knew what his cousin was doing and he sat up straight right away, scaring Luke who dropped the bag he was holding.

"Jeez cuz, don't scare me like that!" he exclaimed with a whispered voice.

"Scare you?" Bo whispered back, "Who's scarin' who with the whole sneakin' round the house thing. An' where were ya last night?"

Luke turned his eyes down, and Bo saw the strain in the face of his cousin. There was also something else there. It looked like a deep sense of failure…

"I can't tell ya right now Bo, but tell Uncle Jesse I had ta go for a while."

"Yur goin away?" Bo said loudly, cringing at his own loudness.

But it was already too late. As Luke was turning around to make a hasty exit, the exit was already blocked. By the same man he was currently running from.

"Uncle Jesse!" Bo exclaimed, "I don't know what's goin on, but you've gotta do somethin… He's leavin!" he said, confusion written on his face.

Putting on the light, ever so slowly, Jesse shook his head gravely.

"If he thinks he's gotta go, he can go," he said in a gruff voice. Turning his eyes towards his eldest nephew he showed him all the love he felt for him, "He knows he can always come back here…"

Luke had been quietly looking down until his uncle said that. He felt so confused. Finding out that your parents were so different then you had pictured them was one thing, but knowing that the person you considered your father for so long, lied to you your entire life, was even worse.

When he looked into his uncle's eyes, he saw the love that was still there, but he felt too confused, too betrayed to even think about that right now. He knew he needed some time. Time to sort things out, to try and find that sense of family again.

Turning his head to his cousin, he shook his head apologetically.

"I'm sorry Bo, but I just… Can't be here right now. Things just hurt too bad. I hafta do some soul searchin, I guess. Find out if I really want to be a Duke, an' if I do, where do I fit in?"

For once in his life, Bo Duke was speechless. His mouth hung open as a fish on dry ground, trying to process what Luke had just said about being a Duke.

"You… Why… I mean… Ya don't wanna be a Duke anymore?" he asked, sounding like a lost puppy.

"I don't know what I want, I jus know I hafta get away from the farm for a while. So, ehh," Luke didn't know what to do anymore. His uncle was standing in the doorway, watching him with love and compassion in his eyes, his cousin was still sitting on the bed, not understanding what was going on around him. And to top it all off, Daisy had just appeared behind their uncle, watching the scene unfold without saying a word.

He had to go… Now.

"Goodbye."

It was the only thing he could say before Bo launched himself into him. Grabbing his cousin tightly as if he wanted to keep him there by force.

Luke returned the hug just as tightly, feeling tears form in his eyes as Bo told him that he understood.

"Whatever it is that's wrong cuz, I hope ya work it out, an' come back soon, cause I'll miss ya real bad…"

"I know Bo, I know, me too…" were the only words that Luke could force through his constricted throat right now.

Suddenly another pair of arms fell around the two boys. Slender arms, attached to their pretty cousin Daisy.

After a minute they pulled back and Daisy watched Luke intently.

"I don't know what's wrong sugar, but ya know we will be here. So ya come back real soon, ya hear?" she said, smiling through her tears.

Luke nodded, his clear blue eyes filling up again.

"Yeah… I hope I can come back… soon."

Turning to his uncle, Luke nodded, "I'm sorry Jesse, but I hafta do this."

"Ya know what this reminds me bout?" his uncle asked, seeing Daisy and Bo standing together and Luke standing alone, holding his bag clutched against his chest.

"You leavin for the Marines… You jus make sure ya know yur way back son. We will be here," he ended, leaving the room, and giving Luke the room to make his exit.

Luke nodded, head down as he left the room, not looking back. The only thought that filled his mind was the one that told him to go.