Pairing Do's and Don'ts

Disclaimer: Don't own the franchise...all I own are a couple of CD's and some clothes.

A/N: This example fanfic is almost guaranteed to make your eyes bleed. (Used from the Zutara War Room on DH...hee hee. I helped create it.) So read at your own risk.

Bad Fanfic Example

"Before letting you lunatics move onto character development, let's see an example of a bad fanfic." I spotted people looking out the window and slammed a ruler on their desk. "ZUKO! OVERHEAD PROJECTOR, STORY, NOW!" I screamed and flicked off the lights. A ghastly and horrifying story appeared.

Katara felt the hot breath of Zuko on her face, as he grabbed her wrists and began dragged her back to his ship. "LET ME GO!" She screamed, but all attempts to break free were futile. As Zuko tied Latara up on the boat, a blinding flash of light erupted out of no where... and the next thing they both knew they where in high school. Katara was wearing designer pump heels and a top that said "Prep" and some extra tight jeans. Her hair was still braided. Zuko was holding a football and wearing a jock sweater. And no scar on his face. Katara looked at him and blushed. Katara mentally slapped herself and started walking away but tripped from the pumps. A girl was standing there. She had brown hair with blonde highlights and her eyes were a variation of colors that changed in the light. She wore a super tight tank top, jeans that hugged her every curve, carried a designer purse with matching boots and had a pretty smile. Mary Sue said, "Oh my gosh, like, are you okay?" Zuko ran up to them confused still wanting to interogate Katara about what happened when he stared into the sparkly eyes of Mary Sue. "My name is Princess Evelynn. I'm not supposed to let people know that I'm a princess though. It can be our little secret. My mom snuck me away from my abusive dad." She batted her long eyelashes. Zuko was very disoriented before the fortuitous change of scene for listen the girl who was speaking to him. And Katara became instantly jealous. "But I'm a bender. I bend love, life, death, heart, hair, clothes, nail polish, shampoo, dogs, cats, shadow, night, moon, ocean, sun, stars, planets," Evelynn went on. "When will she get to regular bending?" Katara thought. "And of course I bend water, fire, earth and air but fire's my favorite!" Evelynn said. Then Zuko said "Duuude you're liek the AVATAR!" Katara wanted to kill her, but wanted to be her best friend at the same time. "I'm also immune to STDs. Wanna know how I know?" Evelynn continued. Katara almost choked on her tonsils. "Because I'm the Pricess Evellyn!" And Katara came over and yelled at Evelynn, and called her a liar. "I am so not a liar. Like...totally. I was going to invite you to my like, super giant mansion with all the money, butlers, maids, and stuff like you could ever dream of." Evelynn told her, her hands moving in the preppy motion. Katara then said, "if you can tell us how to get to our own time we will go" "Oh yeah. I can timebend. So will you like, take me like with you?" Evelynn squealed. Before Katara could say no, Zuko yelled "YES" Zuko then thought, "if I give her to father, I'll be home" "Oh my gah...well. Let's go. But I can't timebend at the moment because I have to read this book and drink the potion and if I do, I may realitybend and make you like love each other and stuff!" Evelynn squealed.

"Do we have to read all of it?" Marie protested.

"Yes. Finish it." I slammed the ruler on the desk again.

At that Katara sighed relizing there was no hope and began to sing songs from High School Musical. "Because I liked the view, when there was me and youuuuuuuuuuuu!" Katara sang. And then the jocks who claimed to be Zuko's friend came bursting through. "NO, NO, NO, NO! Stick to the stuff you knooooowww...if you wanna be cool, follow one simple rule don't mess with the flow, no, noooo. STICK TO THE STATUS QUO!" And Evelynn burst out laughing, glad she had bended reliety and began taking photos of them dancing for the school yearbook. Then Evelynn became jealous and used love bending to make Zuko love her and stuff. And then Katara went over and forsed Evelynn to stop lovebending. And then Evelynn realitybended on Katara to make her start drinking punch and kept making all the guys love her and hate Katara, because Evelynn was pregnant and was being a PMS bitch. Suddenly They listened a great explosion and everything become dark! And when Katara and Zuko open their eyes they were in a luxurious palace. And seated in the throne was Zuko. Now He is the Fire Lord. And Evelynn was there and started love bending to make Zuko love her and stuff and all the other peoples and everything. "Eh wha?" Katara said in counfusion looking around. And it turned out, Katara randomly got lovebending abbilites, and made Zuko hate Evelynn. And Zuko became sick of girls fighting over him he banished Evelynn and Katara. And then Katara was practicing her waterbending while Evelynn listed her bending. "Blood, teeth, bone, eye, ear, fingernail, toenail, foot, arm, leg, ankle, wrist, head, neck, chest, bellybutton, pen, jewelry, tree, bush, flower," The list dragged on. Then Evelynn made foam guy marry her and had little foaming babies. Katara look at herself, And she was wearing a beautiful kimono. She was now one of the Fire Lord's concubines! And then Evelynn had more foamy babies with all the guys on Kyoshi and met Princess Sparklypoo and they went to Ba Sing Se. And then Katara was all "WTF?" And suddenly the handsomest guy you could imagine (cough)GaryStu(cough) came over and kissed Katara right as Zuko walked into the room. "Who are you?" Zuko asked, afraid. "I am Ryu, Evelynn's brother." Ryu said. "And I couldn't help noticing this beautiful girl. Come with me Katara and be my princess.""He's so handsome." Katara though as she stared into his perfect eyes.

"Will this ever end?" Marie asked again.

"Marie...one more word out of you and I promise you'd choose attack of the pissed off fangirls than whatever I have in store for you." I threatened, slamming the ruler on her desk. "Now, shut up and finish reading."

Then Fire Lord Zuko said "EVERYONE! SYNCRONIZED DANCING TIME!" Then everyone broke out in dance...a beautiful waltz that everyone magicly knew how to do...even the foamy babies knew it. Zuko then became supery duperdy jealous, "Oh no you kiss my concubine!" Now was the turn of Zuko of to be jealous and furious before the audacity! Then a supar awesome ninja came out of no where and beheaded Ryu! Then he said, "Aaha i am ninja guy, I kill everyone who not ninja like me!"And then a monster spirite came up behind the ninja and swallowed him whole. And Ryu came back to life and was like "You can't kill me! I'm to perfect to die and used his deathbending skills to kill Zuko, but then Zuko came back to life. So Ryu used his lovebending skills to make Zuko hate Katara and his beautybending skills to make himself even hansomer, Zuko ugly and Katara prettier. Then Katara got a 'Level Up' and put all her skill points into the "kill stupid people" skill. And then Katara took her hair comb and stabbed Ryu and was all "You are so not nice. I love Zuko. Ever since the first day I saw him." and used realitybending to make Zuko hotter and stuff.

"How could you make him hotter? He's a firebender...he's practically as hot as he gets." Marie interrupted.

"THAT'S IT! SECURITY!" I screamed. Jet and Haru came and slapped some tape over mouth and dragged her away. "Anyone else care to give their two cents? No? Good. FINISH THE STORY!" I instructed.

And Ryu died and Evelynn came back to avenge her brother's death. Then Evelynn met Sokka and lovebended to make him love her and divorced Foamy to have Evokka babies! Well... Then...They begins to feel an earthquake, the Earth part and both fall by the formed precipice! They wake up in the middle of a great ceremony. And they discover instantaneously that they are in their own wedding! Then Sokka drank 1 gallon of cacktus juice and went crazy like foamy guy. And Sokka and Evelynn's foamy and Evokka babies were playing in the chocolate fountain and Evelynn saw Haru and lovebended on him. And everyone was there! Even the Cabbage Man, Sokka and his new Evelynn, Jet, Yue, Suki, Zhao, and Zuko and Katara's whole high school class! And then Yue, Suki, Ty Lee, and Azula all became jealous of Evelynn, so Evelynn jealousbended on them to make them not be jealous and stuff. Zuko and Katara just recognized who were present when the priest indicate to them that already they were husband and wife and Zuko could kiss his fiancè/wife. And then Evelynn made everyone cry with her tear and cryingbending. Then kataras head exploded. And Evelynn head and brainbended to put it back together and lovebended to make her love Zuko more. Aang then came in and said, "WHAT THE HELL IS GOIN ON!" And Evelynn lovebended to make him and Toph love each other and the chocolatebended to get the chocolate off the foamy and Evokka babies! Then katara woke up..."It was just a dream..." She got out of bed and went over to the waterbasin, "I really need to stop drinking cactus juice...its messing with my brain." Then everything went back to normal. But not before Evelynn appeared with the Evokka and foamy babies and said "Wow...you were wasted last night off the vodka I brought from the regular world. Thank goodness you and Zuko were married!"

"That's the end...now that you all are eternally scarred, perhaps you'll think twice about making fics like this." I instructed and some of the people looked like they had just seen their entire family killed before them.

Me: Awful fic, huh? Try not to make anything worse than this...although I don't know how you could.