A/N: I know I owed you all another part of this like months ago lol. Life got crazy. I'm finishing up some classes before I graduate in December. Not to mention I'm moving to Jersey and I'm trying to find a job and a place to live. No pressure, right? This place has been my outlet. So, thanks for the great stories and thanks for reading mine. You know how they say you are your biggest critic? It's true and it's nice to know that all the time spent editing one little line doesn't go to waste. At least, I hope it doesn't:) Peace.
Olivia was dozing when Elliot entered her room. He caught the door behind him as it shut. He eyed her as he took his place by the window. Carefully, he laid the bag on the ledge behind him. He cringed when the rustling of the bag woke her up.
"Elliot?" Olivia turned around toward the source of the sound.
"Yeah. Where's Casey?" Elliot nodded toward the empty chair on the other side of the bed. The blanket lying on the seat was the only sign that it had previously been occupied.
"Not sure. She left a note." Olivia shifted her gaze to the folded piece of paper where it rested on the tray. She didn't have the energy to try and read it in her current state. Her head was throbbing and any movement sent waves of pain from her shoulder to her ribs.
"Let's see here…uh, looks like she went home to change. Says she'll be back in…another hour. I must have just missed her." Elliot folded the paper and tossed it onto the ledge.
"She blames herself." She ran a hand through her hair and rubbed the back of her neck. The position she'd slept in was making itself known.
"Want to talk about it?" Elliot resisted the urge to turn into cop mode. She didn't need an interrogation.
"Maybe later, when I can think straight?" She closed her eyes against the onslaught of the rising sun.
"Want me to get the nurse?" He stood and sat on the edge of the ledge, ready to ask the moment she needed him to.
"She just left. It's like they have this sixth sense that I'm finally falling back to sleep." She let out a breath, willing her headache to go away. At least it was one thing that could be cured with a little rest.
"The nerve. I hated every one of my hospital stays." He made a mental note to tell them to let her be.
"You're not going in?" She watched him shift positions so that he was blocking the light from coming into the room.
"In a bit. I wanted to stop by first. See if you needed anything." He studied his hands. The fingers of his right hand were red from carrying the bag from the parking garage to her room.
"Thanks. I think I'll be good once I'm home, though. I see you brought something with you." She grinned as he pulled the bag around to rest on his lap.
"Maureen told me about these. They're books that you can listen to on CD. I thought it'd be easier than trying to read with one arm. I didn't know if you had a stereo, so I borrowed the discman Kathleen brought over last weekend." He could see her smile widen.
"Tell her thanks. I'll return it in one piece." Olivia noticed how awkward it was for him to bring it up. He wasn't the type that sought gratitude or thanks.
"She won't miss it. She's got an Ipod now. She said it's her new best friend, whatever that means." He shrugged his shoulders. He still had yet to understand his daughters.
"Who can compete with that? Tell me something else. Maybe it'll take my mind off how much I could really use some drugs." She shifted positions several times and sighed.
"Maureen aced her Western Civilization test. Said the discussion part of the class is lame, though. The twins have been bugging Kathy to go to camp again this summer. Oh, and Kathleen has a boyfriend she's been seeing for three months. Nice of her to let her father know." He noticed how hard she was trying to concentrate and moved to the other side of the room.
"Thanks. Yeah, girls can keep secrets. I must have kept a dozen boyfriends from my mother. Never had a clue. If she did, she never said." Olivia cursed the direction of the conversation. It was too early.
"Sneaky. Maybe on one of your days off you can make a list of all the tactics." He steered clear of the topic of her mother, opting for a much lighter one.
"You know me. I'll have gone through those CD's by midweek. I'll be looking for things to do. Maybe I'll stop in for some paperwork to take home with me." She held her side, laughing at his glare.
"You come in and you're risking your life." He saw her freeze and cursed his choice of words.
"She said I shouldn't have. Taken her place, that is. It was instinct, though, Elliot. I just reacted. How the hell did I miss it? I never saw him coming." She shook her head in disbelief. She recalled how the hairs on the back of her neck stood up and how she'd almost commented on something not feeling right.
"You weren't expecting it. Who would?" He knew nothing he could say would ease her mind. She was always the hardest on herself.
"I would. I'm a cop. Part of me is pissed as hell for not getting out of it. I could have done something. Once he was there, that was it. I hated not being in control." Her mind raced as she recalled what had happened. She'd always wondered what she'd do. She had her answer, and she didn't like it.
"It happened before you could react. He overpowered you. This thing, it's going to drive you crazy. It's going to eat at you. You either let it control your life or you move on. You gotta' move on, Liv. You're angry that you had no control. You had control. You could have fought like hell but you knew how it could have ended. You saved both of your asses out there. You did good." He hated how much she doubted her abilities.
"She saved me." She started playing with a loose string on the blanket. She stilled her hand and looked up at him.
"She said the same thing about you." He cocked his head to the side and let his eyes fall on her hand, and how it moved up to the cut on her neck.
"Yeah." She let the silence linger longer than she should have. It gave her emotions too much time to come to the surface, and she blinked away the tears that began to cloud her vision.
"What did he say to you, Liv?" He remembered the conversation with Casey in the waiting room.
"Nothing." She spoke softly, her voice barely rose above a mere whisper.
"You sure? I know I'm not Casey, but if you need to tell me something…" He let his voice trail off. He'd never been one for bonding sessions, but it didn't mean he didn't care.
"I…it doesn't matter." She shook her head, willing his sick voice to escape so she could stop hearing it once and for all.
"Looks like it matters, to me." He locked eyes with her and held her gaze. It broke his heart when she turned away.
"He asked if I got the message. He…he called me a...a dyke." She sighed, unable to look him in the eye. She'd mumbled the last part, hoping he wouldn't ask her to repeat it.
"The message. Do you know where you were last night, Liv?" He had a sickening feeling settle in the pit of his stomach when he thought of her being victimized. His friend. His partner. Olivia.
"I saw the sign when we were walking by. I guess he thought we were with each other or something. I don't know. It makes sense, now that I think about it. He wasn't very happy with the idea. I just keep hearing his voice. It's like those old tapes where, when they mess up, it skips and plays the same part of the song. I try to get it out of my head, but I can't. And to think he was getting off on it…" She felt the bile rising and swallowed the urge to vomit yet again.
"What time did Casey call it in? Do you remember?" He doubted she remembered a lot. The amount of pain she was in had probably been foremost in her mind.
"She called it in after he left. Paramedics showed up a while later. Why?" She frowned, trying to piece together what he was getting at. His line of questioning confused her, and added to the pounding behind her eyes.
"Just curious." His palms started to get sweaty under her intense gaze. He cleared his throat, hoping that she'd let it go for the time being. He didn't want to have to tell her just yet. Didn't want to admit that one of their own had turned their back on a fellow officer.
"'Kay. You wouldn't by any chance have some Tylenol, would you? I don't want to pay ten bucks for something I can get for a few dollars." She'd been partnered with him long enough to know when he was keeping something from her. She wasn't in the mood to ask, though, and she wasn't sure she wanted to know what it was even about.
"Yeah. Grabbed one of those little packets at the gas station. Figured you may want some. You see, this stubborn partner of mine waits 'til the last minute to take anything. She also hates asking the damn nurses." He smiled and scooted in his chair so he could get the packet out of his pocket without getting up.
"You seem to know her pretty well. Must be some partner." She waited while he ripped open the paper holding the pills.
"Must be. Check it out. Even comes with a little cup." He held the object up like he was on The Price is Right.
"Which, of course, is included in the price. You're a Godsend. Thank you." She grabbed the cup of water sitting on the tray and downed the pills. She let the tepid water coat the lining of her throat. She took a few more sips before returning the cup to its original place. She hoped he understood what she meant. He'd been there for her throughout the years in more ways than one.
"Sure." He glanced down at his watch and tried to make out the time. He hated to leave.
"I'm a big girl, El. I'm going to take a nap before they come in again." She yawned, as if proving that she had yet to get enough rest.
"I'll see what I can do about that. Call me when you get home." He stood abruptly and stretched.
"I will. Say hi to the guys." She watched him hesitate before nearing the bed. She leaned in, meeting him part of the way when he bent down to give her a hug. The embrace was awkward, with her sore ribs and shoulder, but it did the job.
"Get some sleep, Liv." He held the hug a little longer than he normally would have. If he'd learned anything over the years, it was that life was short. Too short to go without showing the people he cared about just how much he did. He'd taken to calling his girls every other Sunday after they'd gone to church, and his son on Friday nights before the gym. Even though she wasn't his family through blood, he'd always held a place in his heart for Olivia. So, although they rarely hugged or showed such affection, he didn't feel weird about doing it right then.
"We'll see. Watch me lie awake for hours. You know how I get when I'm up." She slapped him lightly in the shoulder with the back of her hand and waved as he walked to the door. She missed him already. As the door slipped shut, she sighed. She glanced around the room before closing her eyes. She smiled as she pictured him marching to the nurses' station and threatening everyone on and off duty to leave her alone. It was the protective side she loved to hate. She'd never let on, but she was glad he was that way, because at the end of the day, she knew it was because he cared for her. And she couldn't remember the last time she felt that anyone did.