Curingangelx3: Hello…yes I know you guys are all mad at me. Yes I know you want to stab me or burn me to stake. I'm sorry fans…I'm sorry flamers…I'm sorry
It's been over a year that I posted a story…or anything for that matter…and I completely regret it. It's really ironic cause…the reason why I haven't posted anything is one…I was very busy applying for boarding schools and getting into a boarding school. And two…is cause I began to get very critical about my writing…I still feel like such an amateur, especially since in English class, I always get points off in grammar
But no excuse…I'll try to post as much as I can even if no one likes my fics or not …well I hope you guys like them….I'm trying really hard to post now because boarding school is so strict and busy . I don't know how the Code Lyoko people can have time to save the world and do there homework for class. Arghs….I want to be able to go back in time to fix all my mistakes on the tests I've been making.
I guess I changed a little bit after a year. My writing…I doubt got any better, but hopefully you guys don't mind : )
Fans of Curingangelx3: LETS CREATE A MOB….LETS SEE WHERE SHE DISAPPERED FOR THE LAST cazillION Years. TELL HER TO SHUT UP…She's making the authors notes tOO LONG…ew…get on with the story!
Curingangelx3: (covers herself so she doesn't get hurt) owww! Okay—okay…I'm back already…okay—okay…on with the story.
Disclaimer: I don't own Code Lyoko…in fact I don't even own a TV in boarding school…which means I haven't seen the show for over many months
Chapter 4-Two-Sided Heart
Love is not selfish; I can't love both you and Sissi. Don't you realize that? But the word love…I can't use it…I regret ever saying it. Because we don't know what love is…we fall in "love" so easily, but we can fall right back out in a second. Is that love? Besides…why do you care so much? There's nothing good about me. Let's stop lying to each other. We can't keep up acting this way.
Ulrich's phone rang violently, "Hello?" he asked. There was a brief pause but there was no one on the other line. A single click ended the call as Ulrich asked again, "Hello? Hey!" Puzzled Ulrich looked at the caller ID which read…Yumi? What…why are you doing this?
All of a sudden, a well-known shrill called out, "Ulrich! Ulrich-dear!"
"Yeah? Sissi, what's up?"
"Ulrich are you doing anything tonight?" Sissi smiled as she gave him a warm hug.
"No, why?"
"Well, I'm free too. So do you want to go on a date with me?"
"Sure, why not. Where do you want to go?"
"Oh! Uhm—there's this really nice restaurant I wanted to go to. Let's go there! Yeah—and I'm paying so don't worry about a thing," she cheerfully told him. Sissi grabbed Ulrich's shoulder but he pushed her slightly away.
"Don't be silly. I'll pay, so lets go already," he told her impatiently.
"Jeesh—Ulrich okay—okay. Stop rushing me," Sissi muttered.
Walking in an illuminated night, the two of them held hands as if they were the happiest couple in the world. All Ulrich's worries melted away and he felt as if nothing could go wrong.
As they arrived at the restaurant, a waiter led them to a table that was closest to a window with a single-lit candle. "Here you both are; a table for two."
"Ohh Ulrich-darling! Isn't this simply wonderful?"
"Ye—h," Ulrich began until his ringtone interrupted him, "Sorry Sissi; hold on a second." Sissi nodded but grumbled as Ulrich turned away.
"ULRICH! I NEED TELL YOU SOMETHING!" Jeremie yelled frantically.
"Jeremie, I don't have time right now. Call me back like in an hour."
"Why don't you have time right now? This is urgent."
"Okay—okay! What is it?" Ulrich agreed in annoyance.
"YUMI WAS CAPTURED BY XANA!" Jeremie panicked. My heart rushed for a moment…but it stayed calm…why?
"I'll be there, but I'm doing something more important right now"
"What! What possibly could be more important then saving your friend from danger?"
"A date with Sissi." Ulrich replied hanging up on Jeremie.
"Hello—Hello? ULRICH?!?"
You mean nothing to me anymore…you can survive by yourself. You're older then me…jeesh. You always used to tell me that I was immature. Stop tormenting me! Leave me alone.
"Ulrich—Ulrich?" Sissi's voice called out.
"Yumi?" Ulrich asked…still deep in thought.
"What did you say?" Her eyes grew wide.
He shook his head, "Sorry, I'm just really out of it, right now."
"I was right…I knew it. You're using me—right? You're using me to get Yumi jealous. Or, you're using me because you're afraid that Yumi won't love you anymore," she began.
"No…that's not true…Sissi…"
"STOP it! WHY ARE YOU HURTING EVERYONE…I KNOW that I can be a bitch...but I always loved you. How come…how come…I try so hard…and—and I know I should be happy with you. But—but I feel so empty…this doesn't feel right. I don't understand…" Sissi covered her head with her hands.
She's right…Sissi…I thought you and Sissi were complete opposites of eachother, but I was wrong. You guys are the same…I caused so much pain for both of you…and all I did was complain about my sufferings...It isn't fair…This isn't fair…I…hate myself.
"Sissi, I don't understand either," Ulrich admitted.
"Go…go to her—now!" she wiped her tears, "Let me play my role in this play…let it all be natural."
"But...I can't…I can't just leave you. My feelings…I'm so confused." Ulrich put his hands over Sissi's shoulder, but for the first time Sissi pushed them away. His phone rang once again, but he ignored it.
"Aren't you going to answer that?" Sissi asked.
"It's okay…It's probably not that important." Ulrich replied.
"Just answer it. You might regret not answering it."
Ulrich answered the phone, "Ulrich, Yumi is dying, and if she dies in Lyoko, she'll never come back to the real world!" Jeremie explained. How is that possible…?
"Jeremie--That's impossible!" Ulrich exclaimed.
"Ulrich are you there?" Jeremie asked. I didn't answer him, I just stood there. "Ulrich, come over here and help us get Yumi back!" Why am I hesitating…why am I shaking? I could just run…I could just save you now. My feet—why wont they move? "ULRICH?!?!" I started to choke as Jeremie yelled at me. But why can't I move? "Ulrich, she's gone…" Jeremie whispered and then screamed, "ULRICH SHE'S DEAD! AND IT'S ALL YOUR FAULT!" Another click ended the call. At that moment…I was petrified…I couldn't believe it—no—I didn't believe it. I would have never let you die…but…you—you were gone…
"Ulrich? Something happened to Yumi…right? I know you care a lot about her…and I'm sorry I couldn't be the one for you. I thank you…for taking me here…for making me feel special. But you…don't need to lie to me anymore." She looked down…and tears began to run once more, "JUST GO! Damn it…why are you such a freak ULRICH…why are you so slow. RUN you loser…run. Get away from me."
"Sissi," Ulrich whispered quietly and ran out of the restaurant. He left Sissi sitting by herself, saying two last words, "Thank you." Then she smiled…and wept.
You should be angry at me, for making you feel like crap. All the questions that you asked, I denied them all. The truth lies in me, and the lies are out now. I'm scared…Yumi…I'll admit that. I'm so worried about you, of all the horrible things that could happen to you. If I was there for you, all this time, I would be holding you safe in my arms… But now…through all my mistakes… cause now…I'm sure that you'd never return to knock on the door of my heart. I know I'm not perfect…but this is beyond…simple accidents…I purposely…caused all this pain and I jus left you alone to suffer.
"YUMI!" Calling out your name in the dark doesn't help anymore…even if I could imagine your smile…It's not there…Even if I could see your eyes in the air…staring at me…your eyes aren't there. Even if I wanted to say that I love you now…and that I had always loved you…I cant. I promise...when I see you again…I'll never let you shed a single tear.
That day, when you asked me those questions…I left you confused…I left you wondering why I never cared—why I had to cause you so much pain. I wasn't myself when I answered you…but I meant every word I said. I never liked you Yumi, cause I always loved you. You were never just pretty; you were always beautiful in my eyes. You can never be in my heart, because you will always be my heart. And why would I cry if you walked away from me? Don't you realize that I would just die at that very moment? This sounds selfish, but my life is definitely more important then you, because you are my life….and that's why…I will not die. That's why I'm alive…you keep my heart beating…you keep me going…you keep me loving you.
Ulrich ran as fast as he could the factory. His thoughts were in agony and could only think of Yumi. He didn't believe that Yumi was dead, he had faith…he knew that Yumi was alive.
"Ulrich!" Jeremie exclaimed as he saw Ulrich on the elevator passing the computer floor.
"No time Jeremie. Just get me to Lyoko—I have to do this alone…"
"Scanning Ulrich! Transferring Ulrich! Virtualization!"
Please…Yumi. Hold on…we've been through so much. Good experiences and even bad. But you were always by my side….we were always together. Let's do that again….lets be hand in hand…let's create memories…that we'll always remember. I'm not afraid to love…I don't care if I don't know what the true meaning is. A two-sided heart…is evil…and I know that I had it….and I don't know if it'll ever fade…I don't care if I have to live with this guilt. I don't care…I just want to be with you… You can scream…you can yell saying that you hate me. I'm coming for you…I promise…I'll never leave you again…I'll make sure you're never hurt. I'm sorry Yumi…I'm sorry…
Curingangelx3: I mostly have more time to edit my fanfics but for now, I hope you enjoyed this edited chapter : ) My exams are tomorrow and throughout next week : (, but after that I have vacation so I'll try to post more chapters of "Not loving me" and I also want to create new fics for several other animes. So be on the look out. (Check my profile sometime if you want.)
Well this is Curingangelx3 signing out, thanks for reading my fic and I THANK YOU SO SO much for staying with me…you guys are the best.