Chapter 5:
The next morning as CJ walked into her office early in the morning and turned on the light, she was surprised to hear a voice from the couch to her left. "Good morning CJ" Abigail Bartlet said as CJ practically jumped out of her skin, "Mrs. Bartlet" CJ said as she took a deep breath and practically slammed the door out of nerves, "I'm sorry, I didn't see you there."
"That's quite alright CJ," Abbey sweetly said as she shifted on the couch so that she more directly faced CJ who was now leaning against her desk, "And I insist that you call me Abbey, none of this 'Mrs. Bartlet' nonsense, I mean after all, we're sleeping with the same man."
Picking up on the dangerous sound to Abbey's sweet and calm voice, CJ said, "Mrs. Bartlet, I understand that you're probably upset right now…" Interrupting her with the same innocent smile plastered on her face Abbey said, "Now CJ why on earth would you think that I might upset?"
"Alright," CJ said as she amended her statement based on the passive aggressive behavior of Abbey's words, "So you're a little more than upset…"
"You're damn right I'm more than upset!" Abbey said with the first hint of a raise in her level of voice and her tone. "Alright you're pissed, I can see that" CJ said, more to herself than to Abbey, as she tried to figure out what her best course of action would be.
"I'm pissed as hell CJ!" Abbey yelled as she stood up from the couch, "I'm pissed on so many levels." Resting her head against her hand as she often did when she was frustrated, CJ said, "I assume this is about the night before last?"
"You mean when you slept with my husband? Yes that's what this is about. Unless there are have been other times this happened?" Staring coldly at CJ as she waited for some sort of response, Abbey sat back down on the couch while maintaining eye-contact with CJ.
"No of course it didn't happen more than once," CJ began with a sigh, "Mrs. Bartlet, the first thing that you have to understand is that your husband would never cheat on you, with anyone, especially myself. And even if he was that kind of man, I would never let him…"
"And yet somehow you both ended up screwing in my bed while I was off making a speech in Colorado." Abbey said with a hint of real sadness mixed in with her usual sarcasm.
"Ma'am, we were both entirely drunk and had absolutely no idea what we were doing. I can assure you that had we been sober nothing like this would have even crossed our minds as a possibility." CJ said with complete sincerity as she looked Abbey in the eyes.
"And that's supposed to make me feel better!" Abbey demanded, "No of course not…" CJ began quietly before Abbey cut her off again. "CJ, you're young, you're beautiful, you have a successful career, don't think that I don't know how men feel about women like you."
Breaking into a small smile for the first time in their conversation, CJ said, "Mrs. Bartlet, I don't know what you mean by 'women like me', but I can tell you that I'm not all that young, I can also tell you that anyone who isn't blind knows that you are the only First Lady, other than Jacqueline Kennedy, to attract so much public attention for her looks, and anyone who isn't blind can also see that your husband loves you more than anything else in the world."
"You can see what good all of that did me," Abbey said dejectedly, "even if he does love me more than life itself, it doesn't change the fact that he went off and fucked his press secretary almost half his age."
Cringing at Abbey's choice of words, CJ continued on with the conversation as best as she could, "It was a mistake Ma'am, everyone makes them, this one just happens to have bigger consequences than most."
"I know," Abbey said with a sigh, to the surprise of CJ who had been gearing up to take a beating from the First Lady, "I know that CJ. It's all that's keeping me from walking out of the door this instant. I know that he, well both of you, made a huge mistake and that you feel guilty over it. I also know that in time, even if we haven't spoken since he told me and I walked out of the room, I am going to forgive him, if only because I am a politician's wife and that is what we do."
"I'm glad that you can at least see that Mrs. Bartlet," CJ said truly glad for the First Lady's uncanny ability to reason during even the hardest of times, "I'm glad you can see that even if you're not ready to forgive him, or me for that matter."
"Well Claudia Jean," Abbey said calmly as she looked up at CJ, "I'm definitely no where near ready to forgive either of you at this point. But in the future, my forgiveness of you will depend on your answer to one simple question."
"Yes? CJ said gently prodding Abbey towards the question that apparently held the key to her forgiveness.
"Did you or did you not purposely get my husband drunk and sleep with him in order to gain political and personal power?" Looking at Abbey with such a disdainful look that if one had to guess, they'd have thought that CJ was the one who's husband had been cheating with Abbey, CJ paused unable to speak for a moment out of pure shock.
When she finally regained her voice, CJ spoke using the First Lady's first name for the first time since she had discovered her sitting in the office, "Abbey, although our friendship may be long gone now in light of recent occurrences, I'd have thought that at least in honor of all the years we were friends, you'd have known better than to have to even ask me something like that."
Maintaining a complete sense of calm, no longer with any trace of her previous anger, Abbey slowly repeated her question, "Did you sleep with my husband intentionally to gain power?"
"No, of course not," CJ said pushing herself up from her desk to stand at her full height, "I would never do anything like that Abbey! Never!"
Quickly regaining all of her previous fury, Abbey stood up and shouted, "Then why the hell would you allow Leo McGarry to give such an image of you to the public!"
After a brief moment in which she was too confused to process what had just happened, CJ sat back against her desk and began to laugh. "What in the name of God do you find funny about this!" Abbey asked indignantly. "Only you would be worried about preserving my dignity at a time like this Abbey."
"You may have made a pretty goddamn stupid mistake CJ, and it may take me a while to get over it, but that doesn't mean that you should take the fall for this. This is as much Jed's fault, if not more, than it is yours, and I don't see why he should get off so easily!"
"Abbey," CJ said as she shook her head and her laughter began to turn into quiet sobs, "Don't you think that I wish it were that simple. That I could simply share the blame, or better yet, go back in time and erase this whole thing? Then you and I could go back to being friends, I could have my old relationship with my boss and continue to work at this job that I love, but we both know it isn't nearly that simple. You said it yourself a moment ago, you are a politician's wife, and as such, you know that someone has to take the blame. This time it's my turn."
Taking a small step towards CJ and gently placing her hand on CJ's own folded hands, Abbey said gently, "Not if I have anything to say about it. I will not sit quietly back and watch as you take the blame for his mistakes. But that doesn't mean you can avoid talking to him you know."
Seeing the surprised look on CJ's face Abbey added, "Leo mentioned when we were talking that you still haven't had a real conversation with the President. I have a reason to be avoiding him, but you need to talk to him about this. Soon."
"Yes Ma'am," CJ said as she wiped the tears that had fallen down the side of her face, "And I truly am sorrier than you can ever know." Smiling sadly Abbey said, "I know." But knowing didn't make it any easier for her to deal with.
About to leave the room, and then choosing to pause right before she opened the door, Abbey turned and said, "There's just one more thing that I wanted to ask. Not as the wife of the man you slept with, not even as a friend, but as a doctor looking out for the well being of the President and all those around him."
"Shoot away," CJ said with a small smile, "I think you've more than earned the right to ask whatever you want." "Well," Abbey said with a small sigh, "What I want to know is just how stupid were you two when you slept together?"
"Mrs. Bartlet?" CJ said slowly, "I'm not sure I understand your question." "What I'm asking is if you did anything that might have a lasting impact on our lives."
"Well if this gets out into the press, it's going to affect the entire administration and…" "No," Abbey said gently as she shook her head, "That's not what I'm asking. I'm asking in a far more personal regard, what I'm wondering is if…if you were aware enough to use some form of contraceptive?"
As she finally realized what Abbey was asking, CJ's face fell. "Oh my god, I don't remember. You don't think…" "I don't know" Abbey said with a sigh, "But you might want to bring that up with my husband when you meet with him."
"Yes Ma'am" CJ said in a state of disbelief as Abbey walked out of the room, and she walked around her desk to take a seat. There was no way that this could possibly be happening.