When One Thing Lead To Another
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Authoress' notes- If you haven't figured it out already, the main pairing will never be possible. Provided Kabuto is some sort of necrophile. Which is a bit weird, even for our standards…
By the way, how did all of this start again?
It's a very long, complicated inside joke where we randomly were passing notes and… Asuka knows more than I do cuz I forget easily (It was a year or so ago.) but the joke was born there. We started using the phrase, "Gaara's mom is so prettier than you!" or, in Asuka's case, "I'M SO PRETTIER THAN GAARA'S MOM!" We decided to write a "beauty pageant" on it but then, Asuka enforced the idea into her story, Ice. Unfortunately, her story was lost so you won't be able to find it on her account. She is retyping it though from memory to tighten some details and whatnot… but yea…
Now you are informed. Get reading.
Disclaimer- We don't won the series Naruto, Sabaku no Gaara, his mother, Yakushi Kabuto and the rest of the Sand Team. By the way, there's gonna be a lot of Kankurou bashing in this story. And, if we get around to it, Kmart bashing too. We hate Kmart. Go Wal-Mart.
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"OH MY FUCKING GOD, THEY STOLE THE CAKE!" screamed Asuka, stopping her attempt to stomp on Kabuto's glasses while they were still on his face.
"WHAT?" Karura screeched, ceasing her tries to pull out Asuka's hair.
Speaking of Asuka's hair…
"Was your hair always dark blue?" Karura asked.
"Nope! I dyed it after the pageant."
"Ohhh…"
"I hate to interrupt your pointless questions, Mother, but that hideous ogre is getting away…" Gaara pointed out.
"AFTER HIM!" cried our heroine.
(Goddess: We have a heroine?
Asuka: Of course! The heroine of this story is Karura!
Goddess: … Sure…)
The entire wedding party chased after the dessert stealers.
Well, almost everyone. Orochi-hime continued sobbing in a dark corner, Kankurou was still sleeping under the alter (hackLAZYMANWHORETHATTAKESAFTERYASHAMARUSTUPIDCROSSDRESSINGPIXIESTICKhackhack) and Gaara didn't exactly feel the need to chase after a freaking cake.
Karura stuck her head through the imaginary the authoresses just made up.
"Gaara darling, I forget to mention… they also took your mint-chocolate chip quadruple fudge swirl ice cream."
Gaara froze.
They could crash his mother's wedding, steal the $364.92 wedding cake and even stuff him into a matching tube top and miniskirt. (Gaara shuddered as he remembered what happened to Uchiha Sasuke at the pageant.)
(Authoress' notes- Again, the whole Sasuke being stuffed into that apparel is from Ice.)
But no one-- and we mean NO ONE-- stole his mint chocolate-chip quadruple fudge swirl ice cream and got away with it.
Gaara followed his mother.
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Several exhausting hours later…
Shrek and Donkey were nowhere to be found. (Well, we did say "never to be seen again".)
Karura shrugged. "Meh. A cake's not that important anyway…"
"BUT WHAT ABOUT MY ICE CREAM?" wailed Gaara extremely uncharacteristically.
"Hehe… about that…" Karura grinned sheepishly. "I kinda made that up so you'd come along…" Seeing Gaara's enraged expression, she added, "I love you?"
Gaara disappeared in a flurry of sand. His mother sighed happily.
"He's so cute when he's about to go on a killing spree," she murmured.
"Yea…" Kabuto, who appeared from thin air, slipped an arm around his newly-wed wife. "But he's gonna be a pain in the ass if he starts another riot…" Karura gave Kabuto a confused look.
"Eh?"
"We could've avoided this whole thing had Gaara not bit me."
"… Seriously."
"Yup." There was a silence.
"GAARAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!" Karura screeched. "ONCE I FIND YOUR SANDY ASS, YOU ARE SOOOOO GROUNDED, YOUNG MAN!"
End of Chapter 3.
Goddess' afternote- I just realized this chapter was incredibly short… I usually write chappies with a minimum of 1,000 words but this is only about 700 or so. Oh well. Please review. I'M STILL WAITING FOR YOUR FLAMES, FLAMERS SO GO AHEAD! I don't give a shit. Asuka might but I don't. I'll just gain satisfaction from you, which is counter-intuitive, isn't it? Ja ne.