That day, Tuesday, I woke up to knocking on my door.

"Christine. Christine? Time to get up. We must get you to the docks soon; we have half an hour."

Quickly, I carefully jumped out of bed and dressed. Once I hobbled downstairs with my trunk, they, Eve and her mother, rushed me outside to the buggy with Eve. We would go to the train station together, she would give me my ticket there, and I would go to the docks alone and get on the Magic. Mr. Deveroux had left two hours earlier because he was a crewmember.

When the buggy ride was over and I got out, Eve thrust the ticket in my hand, slammed the door shut and it merged away.

The ticket said second class.

What? Why did they do that, now? I had no money and they were giving me everything. I now owed them heavily.

My room was on D-deck, D-30. When I got to the end of the gangway, Mr. Deveroux was there to collect the ticket, of course in uniform. "Hello. A second class ticket at a first class entrance?"

"This is a second class entrance-"

"I know, I know. Hmm," he grinned, "All right there, with that scraggly thing?" I could only smile. It was not too heavy, but too wide. "D-30, is it? I'll see you later." Then he let me inside the ship.

I waved the best way that I could while holding the trunk. My room was a single one. The bed's head was against the left wall, the left side was on the back wall. A table and chair were on the left wall in front of the bed. On the right wall behind the door was a hanger rack, and next to it was a small sink. A porthole sat over the bed and two electricity or water pipes ran overhead along the ceiling. The bed's covers were green with white sheets and a pillow. The floor was bare and wooden. The bed itself was wooden and so were the desk, chair and hanger rack. I immediately settled in.

Dinner was chicken soup. The second-class dining room was not so filled when I went. I might have been a bit early.

Exactly five hours after the ship left port, I was in my stateroom when there was a knock on the door.

"Who is there?" I called from my sitting position on the bed. My given response was the sound of a man clearing his throat. The door opened and in stepped Mr. Deveroux. He closed the door and sat next to me. Right next to me.

"What do you think?" he asked, looking straight into my face.

"I think that you spoil me as your guest."

"You are not our guest anymore. You are the Magic's guest."

"If that is how you want to put it, Mr. Deveroux."

"I think you can call me Erik now. I have asked you twice each day for the past week."

I felt flushed in the face. "I am sorry. It's just that-"

"It's alright. I understand." He was smiling. "When I hear 'Mr. Deveroux' I think of my father. Otherwise, I think that I am on duty upstairs. I respect your manners, though."

I laughed nervously. Not many people pointed things out about me.

"I always wondered, though, why you called my sister by her first name?"

The blush returned. "I… did not quite know if she is married or not, so I didn't know her last name." The truth came out. "Please do not laugh."

He still found it amusing, because he was smiling openly. "She is not married. Her last name is Deveroux. Do not be ashamed. Anyone would think that someone her age would be married." He took a breath. "So, where are your cats?" he asked.

I looked around the room. "Under the bed, asleep, is Bright. Magic is on the chair."

"You are lucky that you were able to sneak them into England and back out again."

"You are not supposed to know that."

"Too bad. I do. So, have you ever noticed that Magic is the name of this ship and your gray cat?"

I thought that one over. "Yes. I have. When I first saw the advertisement in the newspaper, Magic was sitting on the kitchen counter. It confused me."

The room was silent for a small while.

"So, what are your plans for this voyage?" he asked me.

"I have not made any. I do not have any acquaintances aboard besides you and you are always on duty."

He looked away from me for a moment. "Not always. Not now, I am not."

"How often are you off?"

"Every four hours, for four hours."

He said 'hours' like 'ohrs'. That was what his accent sounded like.

"What are you going to do in America? That you have not told me yet? There must be some other things other than keeping house…"

"That is just it," I confirmed. "I do not have work; I do not have any friends-"

"I feel left out."

"-except you…I don't have much of an interesting life."

"Why?"

"Because that's how I was…brought up, I suppose. I am very used to it."

"I'll visit you and keep you company," Mr. Deveroux promised.

I smiled shyly, thanking him.

"Will you ever come to England again?"

"I do not know."

"You should. One week is not enough." He stopped. "What sort of area do you live in?"

"A town. I live in a small area, fairly populated. I have neighbors as much as you do, probably, but our property is not even nearly as large as yours. Raoul lived across the street, in fact. We, my brothers, too, used to play right in the middle of the street until my father grew worried that we would be all run over by those cars that started to travel around."

"If my mother ever caught me playing in the street when I was of that age, she would have me whipped."

I laughed, only because of how he said it. But the thought of him being whipped did not seem right.

"My house used to have a playroom."

"You could afford that."

"Is that my fault?"

"No."

"Let's go for a walk."

"What?"

"Outside. Where there is more room than this stuffed up, cramped place. I would have gotten you a first class ticket, but I do not have the money."

"You had a playroom."

"That was my parents money, not mine. They are three hundred times richer than I am. I have not much compared to them."

"I have nothing; so do not ask me to buy any first class tickets!"

"I would never."

There was another silence.

"Let's go!" Erik urged. "It is getting boring in here."

"Oh, all right. And I didn't say that I would not go for a walk with you, I just did not answer."

We left my room and headed downstairs. "I really do not think that I am allowed to do this," Erik told me as we stepped down gray step after gray step.

"Do what?"

"Walk around this ship with you."

He started guiding me through a maze of hallways. They were third class rooms.

"Why are you not permitted?"

"I have work to do. Even if I am off duty, I still do not think that I am supposed to be here with you."

"So then why are you?"

His walking speed gained a little, and he did not answer until a few seconds passed, as though he either was hesitating to respond or he did not hear me. "Because I…want to."

I caught up with him. "Keep in mind that I cannot go as quick as you can."

He turned to me and grinned sheepishly. "Why is that?"

"My foot."

"Oh, yes."

We strolled around a bit, Erik still showing me which ways to turn, as though there was actually supposed to be a destination for us at the end of wherever we were supposed to be going.

Wondering if there was a certain place we were going, and if Erik did really know where he was taking me, I complained, "We are lost."

He laughed almost as though I was insane. "What are you talking about?"

"You have been pulling me around this who knows what place towards no obvious reason. Do you even know where we are going?"

"Yes."

Now I laughed. "How in the world could you possibly…"

"I have been on this ship for three years."

"But I thought that you work upstairs."

He laughed softly. "Christine…"

"Yes?"

He seemed to be in a trance momentarily. When I said 'yes?' I had snapped him out of it. "I know this ship backwards and forwards and upwards and downwards. If I were you, I would not be concerned that I had gotten you lost. I would not do that."

There was a rush of noise from around a corner ahead of us.

"We are near the dining room," I announced, hoping to be of some use.

"I know."

"What time is it?"

"Almost six o'clock. I have two more hours. Why, are you wanting to go back up?"

"Well…"

"Then we shall go." Erik abruptly turned us around and started us back.

"Do you know the way?"

"I told you that I would not get you lost. Yes, I do know the way to your room from here."

He took me back to my room next. It did not take us an hour because we were not strolling and we were not taking our time. He seemed to be rushing us along, even though he had time to return me to my room. I did not say anything about it and let him do the leading.

When we arrived, he did not leave me yet. He came in and we sat on the bed. "Now, was that better than having to sit here and do nothing?"

"I suppose."

"And I learned that you are not as quiet as I thought you were."

"What is that supposed to mean?"

"I have never heard you whine before."

"I did not whine!" I nearly shouted in protest.

Erik chuckled to himself. "Excuse me for thinking so, then."

I fingered the bed coverings. "Was I supposed to learn from this extravagant walk?"

"I hope so."

I knew that he was joking. I did not believe that a simple walk taken in the basements of a ship could be educational in any way. "I learned that you know every part of this ship and I should not argue with you."

"Wonderful. Let's take a walk tomorrow."

"May it be elsewhere than downstairs?"

Bowing his head in a promise, he murmured solemnly, "Of course, if you want."

"I would like to see the first class rooms."

"They are not really special, anyway, but I'll see if I can get you there."

"I thought that you knew everywhere in the ship."

"I do." He continued to stare at the floor.

"Then why did you say that you will see? Aren't you able to maneuver yourself around this ship without getting yourself lost?"

"I meant that I did not know if I could sneak myself out of the officers' quarters to see you."

"Where are the officers' quarters?"

"Behind the bridge. Could we take a walk everyday?"

"Why not? It would give me something other to do than sit here and be bored." I got up and pulled the chair with Magic on it out from under the desk. He woke up and gave me a dreamy look. As I pet Magic on his soft head, Erik said, "You could do other things that do not include me."

"Such as…"

"Well, there is a whole lot of other people on this ship and I am sure that one of them is worth your acquaintanceship." It was not sarcastic.

"Is that a compliment?"

"Excuse me?"

"A compliment? You just gave me one."

"Did I?"

I continued to pet Magic and ignored his whatever-it-was-that-was-bothering-him disorder. Apparently, he did not realize that he said that I was well above everyone else and they had to earn my friendship. I did not think that I had misunderstood. He said that one of the other passengers could be worth my acquaintanceship.

He thought highly of me.

"I think I should be going now." Erik rose from the bed. I stopped stroking Magic when he began to. "Will you be alright by yourself?"

"Yes."

"If you need me, I am only a few flights of stairs up."

I giggled. "A few? Might I remind you that I have a bad foot?"

"I'll come check on you whenever I can. I promise." I stood again, after him. "I shall come here again after you eat your dinner. And do you know where the hospital is?"

"No."

"Never mind. I shouldn't think that you would break a bone or something worse.

"Not while you are worrying yourself."

"If you need anything…"

"I'll be fine!"

"Yes."

"Go!"

"You do not want me here?"

"I did not mean that."

"I know you did not. Just take care of yourself."

"Yes." For just four hours, he was being overprotective.

"I-"

He did not say what he wanted to. He stopped himself short and just turned to leave. "Good-bye."

"Good-bye," I repeated.

After he was out, he came back in. I knew that he really wanted to tell me something, but he just did not seem to be able to. "Christine?"

"Yes? I thought that you were leaving."

"Well…Christine, has it occurred to you that I-"

He did it again; he did not finish his sentence.

"That you what?"

"Never mind."

He left.

I turned back to Magic, and continued to pet him. "Magic, you know, he is acting quite strange."

Magic lay his head down and closed his eyes. He would not sleep, though, unless I stopped touching him and made no more noise after that.

"He is acting as though…" I thought for a moment before telling Magic what I was thinking. I needed to find words to describe it. It was odd, was it not? Erik's behavior? He was not like this when we were at his house.

Magic put his paw over my hand, as though to protest against my petting him. If I moved my hand, Magic would scratch.

I laughed, then muttered finally, "He is acting as though he has feelings for me."

To my astonishment, at that moment, Erik's head poked through the door and he I, in a frantic rush, jerked myself up and halted in midair because Magic had begun to sink his claws in. Almost automatically I pushed his paw off and without a scratch, I leapt to the door. When I looked out, he was gone. No use trying to run after him.

As I trampled back to the bed, the word 'maybe' was replayed and repeated. Maybe? Maybe he likes me? Does that explain his almost flirtatious disposition?

I was now not only confused, but awed.

He was in love with me?

The confusion I was going through made me nearly weak. The whole idea of someone I knew for only a week, and I still could barely call him by his first name, liking me for more than a friend… It had me severely weakened. Erik would have another break in two hours, so that was the amount of time I had to waste before confronting Erik and asking what 'maybe' was supposed to mean and even what he was eavesdropping on me for.

When my time of anxiety was up, I headed upstairs to find the officers' quarters. The place was quiet and emptied when I found it, behind the bridge as Erik had said. I sneaked in and waited. Sure enough and luckily for me, Erik was the first to come in.

"Hello. What are you doing here?" he asked when the door was closed, as though he hadn't scared me half to death before. "I thought I was going to come to you."

"I have to ask you a question."

"Talk."

This was another time of great anxiety, greater than before. I gathered my nerves, inhaled deeply and asked, "What exactly is 'maybe' supposed to mean?"

There, said and done. Now came the answer, the more frightening part.

Erik did not respond. At least not with words. He walked over to me. Then he put his hand to his chin, and closed in on me. His head bent downward, closer towards mine, his breath heating my face… and it stopped.

The next thing that I knew, he was kissing me right on the lips.

My whole body stood still. I had never been kissed by anyone before but my father, whom I knew very well in comparison to Erik. And my father had never kissed me in this manner. Here I was, being kissed by someone I knew for a week.

His arms were around my back and neck, pulling me closer to him. Through shock I did not know if my eyes were opened or closed. Despite all the messages my mind sent to my arms, they made no effort to push him off of me. I did not even know if I was even trying. So, whether I liked it or not, I had to give into him. I felt like I was drowning into him altogether.

Finally he stopped, put his hands in his coat pockets and said, "Did that explain your question?"

"Y-yes," I mumbled.

"Did I frighten you?" he asked, stroking my cheek with the back of his middle and forefingers.

"A… a bit."

"Oh." Erik sat on a bunk, most likely his, and ran his hand through his hair tiredly and sighed. He looked disappointed.

"You can leave now," he said.

I took my crutches and left.

That night I could not sleep. Poor Bright could not sleep, either, on the bed- I was tossing and turning too much. He went underneath the bed, but I still made too much kicking noises for him to tolerate. In the end, he went between my dresses in the hanger rack. Magic stayed on his chair.

Feeling like I was suffocating, in the middle of the night, I opened the window.

Through the whole night, flashbacks of Erik kissing me tore through my head, asleep or awake. I sometimes felt as though he was in the room with me.

Morning came, finally. I dressed and began talking to Magic and Bright. Then I noticed that the porthole was closed.

But I never closed it!

Perhaps I did while I was half asleep

A knock came at the door. It had to be Erik. I chose not to answer. The knocker continued.

"Miss? I have your breakfast," an unfamiliar voice, belonging to an American man, said. "Someone sent you your breakfast."

"Who are you?" I demanded.

"Steward Dewing."

Frantically, I put Magic and Bright in the trunk and casually opened the door. A man, Steward Dewing, was holding a tray with two plates of food and orange juice. There was a note card.

"Do I have to…never mind," I said. I took the tray and set it on the table. Then I took five cents from my purse, gave it to the man, thanked him and closed the door. The first thing I did after that was read the note:

I am truly sorry for what happened last night. It is now history. But, I am also sorry to tell you that history does repeat itself and this one may if I lose control of my behavior again. I think I love you, Christine. You are as beautiful as the sea, even more…

He had given me smaller compliments before, but this one was much, much more. I could have fallen onto the bed in embarrassment. How could he think of me like this? How could anyone? But he did, nonetheless.

I knew that if he were to enter the room at that moment, I would be afraid enough to crawl under the bed.

After I ate the thoughtful gift from Erik, the breakfast, I began pacing the room. As I went back and forth, Bright's head followed me as he sat on the bed. Magic sat next to him, asleep. I spoke to myself.

"He likes you. You are not sure if you like him or not." I stopped. "Do you like him? Maybe the only reason you did not move last night was because you were enjoying yourself. No, that was shock." I paused. "Now what are you supposed to do? You are so frightened that you will not leave the room and you are so bored that you are talking to yourself aloud!" Then I started to laugh. I must have sounded like an idiot! I sat on the bed next to Bright. He gazed at me and squeezed his eyes to show his pleasure being with me. All right, so Magic and Bright loved me, too, but that counted as love between sons and mother, not man and woman love that Erik seemed to want. I was not sure that I was ready for that. But I should! I had grown surrounded by men, all of them older than myself, and I should not be afraid of Erik!

But I still felt that I was, and not because he and I hardly knew each other.

Confused as to how I felt, I took a nap next to the balls of fluff on the bed. I did not know what time it was when I got up. I wanted to know, and I wanted to eat dinner. I fixed myself and just as I opened the door, Steward Dewing was about to knock. Once again, he was holding a meal tray. He also wanted to tell me that it was one o'clock and I had missed dinner. I received my dinner from him and closed the door. I read the note:

Are you ever going to come out of hibernating? Or are you still afraid of me? I want to see you. I am coming, whether you like it or not.

Oh, no, he was not coming! Not while I was here, at least. I ate and hid the cats, the poor animals, and left. Down the right of the corridor was Erik. In an instant, I closed the door behind me and ran as fast as I could in the other direction to another stairwell. I wanted him to not find me, but that was going to be a bit difficult, considering that he had longer, stronger legs and I had an injured foot.

"Where are you going?" he shouted from one flight below me. I laughed and shook my head. I intended to go all the way up, but at B-Deck I got off. I was not going to strain myself to get away from him

Erik was a clear fifteen or twenty feet behind me. And he was not running; he was speed walking. I knew why. I did not think that an officer on this ship was allowed to be chasing a lady passenger, on or off duty. So he was not making it obvious that he was following me.

I realized that I was in first class area. People in furs and elaborate suits were walking around, gaping at me. I did not stop. One asked me as I rushed by, "Lady, are you lost?" I ignored him. Soon I found the dining room. Stewards, passengers, everyone stopped to look at me. Unreasonably, I shouted, "I am not here to eat, just let me be!" Through all the noise and the chaos, I depicted Erik's laughter from the crowd.

When I finally got out, I realize first that Erik was still inside. People were asking him questions and they were closing around him. Good for me. Second, I was lost. Well, I did feel like it. I knew that I was on B-Deck, the fore well deck. Oh, my, was it cold! I had no wrap with me.

"Amazing how you are ahead of me and I am taller and you have got a weakened foot."

I spun around. Erik was ten feet away.

"Why are you running away from me?" He was laughing.

I shrugged my shoulders, smiled, and dashed for shelter under the forecastle deck. He followed, and I made my way to a staircase and went down to D-Deck. There, on that deck, was the second-class dining room before my room. But I did not know how to get to it from where I was. I had to saunter around blindly. I needed a staircase, badly. Erik was getting closer.

Finally, I found a stairwell that took me only up. "I want to go down!" I muttered loudly. "I know the below decks better!"

"So do I!" I heard Erik call out.

I ran all the way to the Boat Deck. The whole way up, I heard Erik laughing and telling me that I could not do it. That made me to go faster. Up on the boat deck, he could definitely not run. Crew and passengers would see him. And, I knew exactly how to get to my room from the boat deck.

At the top, I chose to wait for him. He was still at A-Deck when I reached the top. I walked over twenty feet away from the stairwell. When he came up, the first person he would see would be me.

"Oh, I see. Trying to get me into trouble, are you not? Bringing me up here to let Captain Dorington see me running after you, am I right?"

I nodded, flashed him a grin that said, "I am smart," and ran off to find a stairwell that went all the way to D-Deck. I made sure that he followed. Somewhere around C-Deck, he disappeared. I waited a minute or so. Deciding that he was too behind, I continued to D-Deck. When I reached it, I looked back up. I could not see Erik. I waited a little more, then slowly walked down the corridor to my room. I turned the knob of my door and turned myself around at the same time to check and see if Erik was behind me. The place was empty of him. I entered the room backwards and when I was in, I locked the door.

Erik was right behind me in the room.

My mouth dropped right open. I made a lunge for the door, one hand of mine on the lock, the other on the knob. Within seconds, Erik darted around me and put his hands over mine and begged, "Please do not go, Christine." And as I tried to pry the door open, he firmly tightened his grip on my hands. I looked at him with anguish. He just smiled. Then he pulled my fingers off of the door and led me away from the door, too. We stood in the middle of the room, my hands forcefully in his, and his glare on me endless. It was not a glare of anger. He had affection for me, as easy as that. His glare said so.

"Why do you want to run away from me?" he asked.

"I do not know."

His hands had seemed to be pinching mine, but not anymore. They relaxed, but stayed over mine. I was a prisoner.

"I will not eat you. I promise."

I could not help but laugh.

"Have I said that I would?"

"No."

"Then why do you seem to be so scared?"

"Because…."

"I won't throw you overboard, either."

"I did not say that you would…"

"I am not evil."

"I didn't say that, either…"

"Then will you look me straight in the eye and stop acting like I said that I was going to eat you?"

I looked into his eyes. Even with the emphasis he had used with what he just said, his eyes were not cold.

"Are you mad at me for what I did last night?"

"No."

"Was that one your first?"

"What one?"

"My kiss to you."

"Yes, it was."

"So I frightened you."

"Yes."

"Is that why you are so afraid? I am sorry."

"You said so in your note."

There was a quick silence. "Christine… do you like me?"

"Yes."

"…as a friend?"

"Yes, I suppose so."

He was having trouble getting his words out. "Or more than that?"

"I do not know."

My hands grew wet in his. He still did not release me, or my hands.

"Would it be so bad for you to like me more than a friend?" he asked.

"I do not know."

"Do you know anything?" He was smiling.

"Not in this situation."

"I know something."

"What is that?"

"I want to kiss you again."

I had no response to that.

"May I?"

I did not know whether to let him or not.

"Please?"

I thought back to the previous night.

Was it really that bad?

Or was I just shocked?

Too shocked.

He would not eat me.

He would kiss me.

He did. Without waiting for an answer, he went right ahead and kissed me. My hands stayed in his, and I realized how much he was enjoying himself.

"Do you love me, Christine?"

I had to laugh. He was so persistent! And eager.

"Why was that so funny?"

"I know that you do not want to hear me say this, but I do not know."

"I think that you should know."

"Well, I do not."

"I know I do."

"I know that you do."

"I have for quite a while now."

"Really?"

"Since your brother shot you."

"You mean since you first met me."

"No, I met you on this ship before, remember?"

"Yes."

"And I liked you even then, but I did not know you."

"You did not!"

"I did."

"I do not believe you."

"So don't. I was just telling you."

"You are mad."

"No, I am not."

"Yes, you are."

"I'll decide that."

"Usually those that are mad do not realize it."

"And if I am not mad, then I'll know." He let my hands go. "I think I might have to leave to work now."

"What time is it?"

He reached into his pocket for his watch. "It is almost two o'clock. I have two hours until I start another watch. I should be leaving now."

"Do you have to?"

He smiled proudly. "Are you missing me already? I think that you do love me."

I blushed and turned around, walking to the end of the bed. Erik came after me and turned me around. I had to face him again. He was still smiling, and with speed he stood me straight up from my almost crouching position.

"Do you remember my note when I said that you are beautiful?"

"Yes."

"Well, you are."

He was making me blush again.

"Especially when you blush."

"Stop it."

"I was expressing my opinion. You cannot stop me."

"You have to leave now, don't you?"

"Now you want me to go?"

"If I do not have to hear you complimenting me, yes."

"That was not nice."

"Sorry. I still love you, though."

"Aha! You admit it!"

I crimsoned. One should always watch what comes out of one's mouth. One should think before saying.

"I should leave now."

"Good-bye."

For some reason, he was not anything to fear anymore. I grew used to it by the end of the week. The 'it' was the fact that there was a person in my life that did not neglect me as my brothers did. Erik acted as though he had known me for all my life. We were old friends, neighbors, perhaps, and we stuck together whenever possible.

Eventually, the voyage ended. Departure day was the same as it was in England. Erik was on watch when I departed from the ship. He was regarding me with pride all the way from the top deck.

We hadn't said good-bye the day before. In fact, we hadn't said anything about meeting each other or if he was going to stay in America. He did not even know where I lived, or how to get to my house. I had to go by train, but Erik did not know that. Suddenly the fact that we had done no planning for after the voyage made me feel guilty and odd. I stared back at Erik. He was not there in his spot. He had other things to do, I decided. The question tugged at my mind. Would I see him again? Was he planning to visit me? He had promised, I remembered. But he did not know where to go! And nobody around here would know me and where I lived.

The questions stopped being asked in my head and I made my way to the train station. As I had bought my ticket to England, without thinking, I bought my train ticket to home. Yes, home. I wanted to go home. Away from James. Back in my own little house all alone and cutoff from the world. Erik could visit occasionally. I could recover completely from my gun wound. I would return to my normal routine that I had done for the past two years. No more ocean crossing anymore. I missed home.

The train station was having an ordinary day. I entered, just another person about to travel. I was a traveler who missed her bed and the smell of her house. Bright and Magic, too, were travelers. As far as Erik went…..

When I entered the station, I remembered what I had thought of when I had first came here in the beginning of the month, before going to England. That 'hole' that I had wanted to 'fill.' Now I realized, what exactly was supposed to be there? What was supposed to go in my 'hole?'