The Fifth Competition
"The rules are simple." Said Ryuuzaki. "Whichever team wins the most matches wins, and moves onto the next round of the tournament."
"Are these full length matches?" asked no one in particular. YOUR favorite character, I suppose. Assuming he is present.
"No." said Sakaki. "Three game matches. Just to keep everything short and so you don't get fatigued because we want to finish this sometime this century."
"Wait." Said Inui, raising his hand. "One doubles match and three singles matches constitute four matches total. Suppose each team wins two matches. What is the tiebreaker?"
"I'm glad you asked." Said Banji. "The tiebreaker is as follows. Each team chooses one of their players to step forth, and we will give them a task. Whoever completes the task first will win."
"Does the task involve tennis?" inquired Gakuto.
"Um…no." Banji admitted.
"Aww…" said everyone.
"But what are you all whining about?" demanded Ojii. "We're playing tennis right now in case you haven't noticed!"
"He's got a good point." Sengoku commented.
"All right," said Ryuuzaki as she pulled out an empty tournament bracket thingermajig. "Everyone send their Pet down to pick the numbers out of this hat so we can start."
The Pets did the aforementioned command and each took a paper from the hat.
"So, whichever team as the number one please raise your hand and tell me your team number and your Team Name!" said Ryuuzaki, opening up her marker.
Yana raised his hand. "My team as number one!" he said. "We are Team One and our Team Name is SHATS."
"SHA—" Ryuuzaki started to write but then she stopped and whipped around. "It's WHAT?"
"SHATS." Said Yana.
"Do you know what that means?" said Eiji since he happened to be standing next to Yana.
"Yeah." Said Yana. "It's an acronym. It's all of our first initials arranged in such a way so we can pronounce it."
No one said anything.
"What?" said Yana. "We couldn't use our LAST NAMES because then there wouldn't be any vowels…"
"Okay…" said Ryuuzaki. "SHATS, it is then…"
She hesitantly finished writing that down.
"Oh wait, I get it!" said Taka. He looked at the rest of his team. "Why didn't we notice that?"
They all slapped their foreheads.
"Anyway." Said Ryuuzaki. "Who has the two?"
"Here!" said Saeki. "We are Team Four and our Team Name is The Prince of Tennis and Friends."
Ryuuzaki paused once again and looked at them. "Come on." She said. "What is it really?"
"That's really what it is." Droned the rest of the team.
"We wanted you guys to think up GOOD names." Ryuuzaki rolled her eyes and turned around to write 'The Prince of Tennis and Friends' in the number two bracket. "So… our first matches will be between SHATS and The Prince of Tennis and Friends."
EVERYONE slapped their foreheads.
"Let's continue…" Ryuuzaki sighed. "Who has the three?"
"Team Three!" Tachibana raised his hand. "Our Team Name is Pillars."
"All right." Said Ryuuzaki. "It seems totally random, but at least it's not WEIRD." She turned around and wrote The Pillars in the third slot.
Tezuka cleared his throat, which caused the world to come to a stop.
"Yes, Tezuka?" Ryuuzaki asked.
"It's not THE Pillars." He said. "It's just Pillars."
Ryuuzaki stared at him and waited.
"As in without 'the' at the beginning." Tezuka clarified.
"…Fine." Said Ryuuzaki as she crossed out 'the'. "Happy?"
"Mildly." Tezuka responded. "Close to it. But not so much."
Ryuuzaki knew that there was no way to please Tezuka so she just decided to move on. "Whose got the four?" she asked.
"TEAM SIX." Said Akutsu in the most commanding tone EVER.
Everyone paused.
"Okay…" said Ryuuzaki. "And…what's your Team Name?"
"The Snakes." Said Akutsu.
"Got it." Said Ryuuzaki. "Now, is that with or without 'the' at the beginning?"
"WITH." Said the whole team.
"Okay." Ryuuzaki said. "So our second groups of matches will be between Pillars and The Snakes."
"This is going to be so much fun." Said Sakaki randomly.
"I know." Said Banji. "All of our teams playing with each other and against their own teammates…what else could be better?"
"Oh…nothing." Said Ojii.
"Who has the five?" Ryuuzaki asked.
"Team Five!" said Oishi. "Our Team Name is The Rhythm."
"With a 'The' at the beginning?" Ryuuzaki said.
"Um…I don't think it matters." Oishi said.
"It DOES matter!" Kamio interrupted. "It is THE Rhythm. Very important. You can't just be 'in rhythm'."
"That's a good point." Said Ryuuzaki. "You CAN'T be."
"Can you even be 'in THE rhythm?" questioned Sengoku. "Isn't that something you made up?"
"No!" said Kamio, crossing his arms.
"Whatever!" said Ryuuzaki. "Next! Who has six?"
"My team." Atobe barely raised his hand. "We are Team Eight, and our Team Name is The Team That Is Better Than Shuusuke's Team."
Team One gasped and looked SO much more offended than they should have.
Except for Fuji. He looked SUPER happy.
"Oh Yuuta." He said lovingly.
"All right…I'm just going to shorten that to the first letter of each word…" Ryuuzaki said.
"No, don't do that." Said Shinji. "We won't be able to take ourselves seriously."
"It's true." The team agreed.
Ryuuzaki gave an exasperated sigh and wrote out the ENTIRE sentence.
"Okay, so…" Ryuuzaki said. "The THIRD set of matches will be between The Rhythm versus The Team That Is Better Than Shuusuke's Team."
Those two teams glared at each other.
"Let's finish up this list so we can start the actual tennis." Said Ryuuzaki. "Who's seven?"
"That is us." Said Sanada. "Team Seven. And our Team Name is ii Data."
"How do you spell that?" Ryuuzaki questioned.
"Lowercase i, lowercase i, space, capital d, lowercase a, lowercase t, lowercase a." Inui spelled.
"Okay." Said Ryuuzaki. "That makes TONS of sense."
"It does." Said Inui. "If you're ME."
"And last but not least…" Ryuuzaki looked around. "Number eight?"
"Us!" said Eiji, jumping up and down. "Team Two!"
"And what's your Team Name?" Ryuuzaki asked.
"We are…" Eiji said excitedly. "Playing Doubles With Five People!"
The teachers paused.
"Well, no," said Sakaki. "That's against the rules. You have to play doubles with TWO people, hence the name."
"No, no." chuckled Eiji. "That's our TEAM NAME! Playing Doubles With Five People! Because there are five people on our team and we all play doubles!"
Everyone's eyebrows raised so fast it actually made a collective noise and a new sound effect had to be created for the sound of eyebrows being raised by a mass of people.
"Playing Doubles With Five People…" said Ryuuzaki with a cautious nod. "Okay… I got it…" She wrote it down. "All right people. The final match will be between ii Data and Playing Doubles With Five People."
"Wowzers this will be interesting." Said Banji.
"Do you suppose they all went crazy in those little houses?" Ojii whispered.