SHATS vs The Prince of Tennis and Friends
"The first match is the doubles match." Said Sakaki as he sat in the referee's chair. "Best of three games. Fuji and Taka versus Saeki and Sakurai!"
The pairs stood at the net on either side.
"Good luck." Said Saeki, extending a hand.
"Thank you!" said Taka, taking his hand. "You too!"
Sakurai extended a hand for Fuji, but Fuji only stood there looking happy.
"…" faltered Sakurai.
Each team retreated to their own baselines.
"Just so you know," said Sakaki. "We're kind of making up our own rules because we're only playing three games in each round. So, instead of the usual service rules, it will be played as such. Each team must choose the person they wish to serve for them, and then the other team does so as well for the next game. If we need the third game, then the people who didn't serve in the previous games will alternate serving, just so it's fair."
Everyone stared at him with question marks above their heads.
"Okay, look." Said Sakaki. "I'll lead you through it for the first game and then you all have to figure it out on your own. SHATS is serving first, so between Taka and Fuji, who do you want to serve?"
"I'll let Fuji do it." Taka said, tossing the ball to Fuji.
Fuji caught it and then turned to Saeki and Sakurai.
"Okay." He said.
Sakaki motioned for them to commence their tennising, and they did.
And, needless to say, Fuji schooled everyone while he was serving. Saeki and Sakurai just stood there and were owned. Completely owned.
"1-0!" announced Sakaki. "That went quick! Now, between Sakurai and Saeki, who do you want to serve?"
"Um…you can do it." Said Sakurai randomly as he gave Saeki the ball.
"All right!" said Saeki.
"Wait, switch sides first." Sakaki said.
"Oh right!" chuckled everyone. It had been a while since they had played tennis after all. It's been like four days.
They switched sides, but only after stopping by their benches.
Fuji looked at Taka.
"Taka, let's let this go into the third game so we know what's going on with our coach's random rules." He suggested.
"Are you sure you want to do that?" Taka asked nervously. "I mean… what if we end up losing the third game?"
Fuji only blinked.
"You're right." Said Taka. "Never mind!"
"Thank you, Taka." Fuji smiled.
They took to the court again where Sakurai and Saeki were already waiting.
It was quite obvious to everyone that Taka and Fuji threw the game and allowed the serves to get by them. In fact, you'd have to be an idiot not to know they threw the game because they just stood there and watched the ball go by them. It's not like Saeki had mad awesome serves so that ALL THEY COULD DO was watch the ball go by them, but they seriously were just like…
Watching the ball go by them…
"Um…okay…" said Sakaki after the round was over. "The score is 1-1! So, Taka will serve the first ball, then Sakurai will serve the next one, then Taka, then Sakurai."
"Oh, I understand." Said Fuji. "Taka, we didn't even have to throw the game."
"So you DID throw it!" said Saeki angrily. "HOW DARE YOU!"
"I thought it was obvious." Said Fuji.
"It was!" said Saeki. "But how dare you still!"
"SHATS serve!" said Sakaki.
Taka threw the ball up into the air and followed through beautifully. "BURNING!" he shouted.
It was glorious.
"15-0!" said Sakaki.
"Wonderful follow through, Taka." Said Fuji.
"Thanks!" said Taka.
Sakurai picked up the ball and looked nervously at Saeki.
"You know," he said. "I don't think we're going to win this one."
"Yeah… probably not." Saeki agreed.
Sakurai, his spirits low and his morale even lower, served the ball, and it was quickly returned. Saeki, who also had quite low spirits, failed at returning it again.
"30-0!" Sakaki said.
"I feel like not playing anymore." Sakurai frowned.
"SHATS serve." Said Sakaki.
"BURNING!" Taka yelled, and the ball burned right by Team Prince of Tennis and Friends.
"Game point!" said Sakaki. Then he paused. "Well, actually. If SHATS scores this point then they win their doubles match. So go ahead, Prince of Tennis and Friends."
Sakurai and Saeki looked at Sakaki with sad expressions. Then they lamely served the ball, it was easily returned and they didn't even bother to retrieve it.
"GAME SET AND MATCH!" yelled SAKAKI.
"HOO-RAH!" chanted SHATS.
"Nice job not trying at all." Said Ryoma to Saeki and Sakurai.
"Shut up!" they said angrily.
"Let's move right along to the Singles 3 match!" said Sakaki. "Yana versus Hiyoshi!"
"Go Yana!" cheered SHATS.
"If we win this game and I'll certainly win mine then you won't even have to play, Kirihara." Said Mizuki.
"I WANT to play." Said Kirihara begrudgingly.
"We have to win all of the leftover matches to win." Said Yukimura to Ryoma. "We'll tie if we lose one. And we'll lose if we lose two."
"I just want to get a chance to play too." Said Ryoma.
"GAME SET AND MATCH!"
Everyone looked up and realized they had missed the entire match.
"Aw man…" said Yana as he trudged back to his team's bench.
"What?" said Mizuki. "You already lost?"
"…Yeah…" Yana said as they looked over at the Prince of Tennis and Friends all doing a ritualistic victory dance with Hiyoshi as the center of attention.
"Whoa." Said Kirihara. "I didn't even notice you changed courts."
"I'm still drinking out of my water bottle." Taka said.
"I saw it." Said Fuji.
"Great…" Yana frowned.
"Let's start the next match!" Sakaki said. "Mizuki from SHATS versus Yukimura from The Prince of Tennis and Friends!"
"Come on, Yukimura!" said Sakurai. "You'll be fine!"
"Yeah, no problem!" said Saeki. "Mizuki's a pushover!"
"Definitely." Said Ryoma.
"Beat him in five minutes." Hiyoshi urged.
Then they all looked at Yukimura as a trickle of blood fell from the side of his mouth, and then he did a face plant into the ground in front of him.
Sanada's Yukimura senses started tingling, and he immediately ran to his teammate's side. Thankfully, The Prince of Tennis and Friends managed to jump out of the way before they were launched into space again as Sanada caressed Yukimura's limp body and yelled for someone to call an ambulance.
"Well, he called that, didn't he?" said Ryoma to the rest of the team.
"He did." They agreed, nodding.
"All right…" said Sakaki as the ambulance drove away. "I guess we can safely assume that that match has been forfeited."
"But I wanted to play tennis…" complained Mizuki.
"HA!" said Kirihara with a laugh. "How ironic! I'm laughing! HA HA! Look at me, I'm laughing!"
"Shut up!" said Mizuki.
"The final match is between Kirihara from SHATS and Ryoma from The Prince of Tennis and Friends." Sakaki announced.
"No pressure or anything, Ryoma, but if you lose this match then we're out of the tournament." Said Saeki.
"Did you forget who I am?" Ryoma said.
"Oh yeah." Said Saeki. "You're the Prince of Tennis."
"Damn straight, HOLLER." Said Ryoma as he grabbed his racket and walked to the courts.
The match began and it was SO intense. For a while, no one could keep their eyes off the match because it was all… a REMATCH and crap. But then everyone started to get bored.
SO bored, in fact, that they went off to the ice cream man that had just pulled up outside. WHAT the ice cream man was doing driving around in the pouring rain is beyond me, but he certainly got business when approximately forty people came stampeding out of the building and all requested their own delectable treat, like the Choco Taco and other various delicious things.
Whence they re-entered, they discovered that the match was over and both Ryoma and Kirihara had collapsed on the courts.
Sakaki's stance suggested HE had just played tennis too.
"How did you all leave in the middle of such an intense match?" he yelled.
"Who won?" asked Taka.
"Winner…The Prince of Tennis and Friends!" said Sakaki.
"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" yelled Kirihara dramatically as he writhed around on the ground.
"You know what this means, don't you?" said Sakaki.
"TIE BREAKER!" yelled everyone as they threw confetti up in the air.
"Select who will be doing the tiebreaker for your team." Sakaki said. "And only after you have selected someone will we tell you what the event is."
The teams went into huddles.
"I say we pick Ryoma." Said Saeki to what remained of his team.
"Yes." They all agreed.
Then they paused.
"Good huddle, guys." Saeki commented.
"Yeah, good huddle." They all agreed.
Then they got out of their huddle and looked over at SHATS who were still in their huddle.
"Yeah…so how about Fuji?" Kirihara suggested.
"I'm down with that." Said everyone else.
"Okay." Said Fuji with a pleasant smile. "I hope I don't mess anything up."
"Don't worry, Fuji!" said Taka. "We believe in you."
"Oh, thank you Taka." Said Fuji.
The huddle broke after that, and both the teams faced each other to discover that the coaches had set up two chairs facing each other with only about a foot of space between them.
"Please, have your representative step forward and take a seat for…" Sakaki led. "A STARING contest!"
Everyone gasped.
Ryoma took a step forward and got into the seat. Everyone on the other team did not move.
"Please not Fuji please not Fuji please not Fuji OH NO MOTHER FU—" Ryoma thought just as Fuji stepped forward and took the empty seat.
"To make things easy." Said Sakaki. "The first one to blink loses. Ready?"
Ryoma loosened his collar.
"Set…?"
Fuji sat up straight and crossed his legs.
"GO!"
Fuji's eyes shot open and he became Scary Creepy Fuji once again.
"AH!" Ryoma yelled as he fell over backwards in his chair, throwing his hands over his eyes. "My eyes! They BURN!"
"WINNER!" Sakaki pointed at Fuji.
Fuji triumphantly stood as his team ran over to hoist him up over their heads and carry him off, but only ended up giving him a friendly handshake.
"So," Sakaki said. "The Prince of Tennis and Friends has been eliminated from the Tournament! And whoever wins in the match between Pillars and The Snakes will play against SHATS in the next round!"
"WOOOO!" said everyone.
"Speaking of Pillars and The Snakes, let's get that round started!" said Banji as he jumped up in the referee's chair.