-1AN: Sorry that I didn't have this chapter up Tuesday. Having a rough week. Before we get to the next chapter I want to personally thank the ones that have review, commented and help me improve this story. Daelayni, Nari-Chan 13, I Know Your Name, Fruits Basket Girl 911, NatsumiSato, Kikyomusdie, Serinity'sAngel, Gothbird777, ItsADorkThing. Thank you all.
I was feel a bit sorry for Yuki myself, so this chapter makes myself feel better. Poor Tohru doesn't know how she is feeling, at all right now, and its hard for her to reach out to everyone and make everyone feel like she used to. So she tends to cling to one person, Kyo in this case.
Chapter 12 Yuki and Tohru.
Tohru lay there tossing and turning. She looked at the clock 3:40AM the red lights told her. It hadn't moved much since the last time she had looked at it. The medicine wore off, and I can't find it, guess Shigure took it to his room, or Hatori didn't leave any. She finally flopped over to her back, trying to take deep breaths and keep control of her self. She lay there staring up at the ceiling listening to Kyo's soft breathing, from the floor. Mom, what did I do to deserve this? All I'm doing is causing more pain for everyone involved, especially Yuki, why have I been so mean to him. I'm so thankful for Kyo, with out right now I'd probably lose my mind, he keeps me here. But Mom, why? I've tried to be a good person I've always tried to do the right thing. I've never hurt anyone on purpose. So why MOM WHY? Why would anyone want to hurt me like this. Why would someone do this to me? But tonight there was no comfort from her mother. There was no comfort, at all. Always before she had been able to comfort herself, and now, tonight she wasn't able to. She felt so alone, more alone staring at the ceiling and clock than she had ever felt in her life. She wanted to cry, her chest was empty and hollow. I can't cry anymore I've cried them all out. She turned back and looked at the clock, 3:46AM. Maybe I should fix myself some tea.
She crawled to the bottom of the bed and scooted off not wanting to disturb Kyo. When she got to the door and looked down the hall. At least it doesn't hurt to walk so bad anymore. There were no lights on except for the dim light coming under the door from her bathroom and the house was quiet. I guess everyone is asleep. The stairs were pitch dark though and she figured the downstairs would be the same thing. She looked back at Kyo, and briefly thought of waking him and having him come with her. He was lying curled on his side, his arms thrown over his head, partially blocking the light that she had to sleep with on. His orange hair was laying across the pillow, his lower lip stuck slightly out. He looks a lot younger when he sleeps, I can't wake him up, he has to be tired too. I need to let him sleep. This is stupid I've walked these halls a million times, this is my home. I can do this.
She took a deep breath and hurried to the kitchen, immediately hitting the light switch, flooding the room with a bright white light. She let out her breath and sighed with relief. Taking a few deep breathes to bring her pulse back to normal.She glanced around the kitchen and smiled slightly. The room was already a mess, dishes were piled in the sink, the garbage was piled by the door, and left-overs from take out places where left out on the counter. It almost looks as bad as it did when I first moved in, I am useful, I guess. She put the kettle on the stove and began to heat it, sitting down at the table for a few minutes. She felt restless, I just can't sit here, I am sick of thinking. She began to straighten the kitchen.
Yuki, looked out of his bedroom door, when he heard soft footsteps in the hall. He was surprised to see Tohru hurrying down the stairs alone. He glanced back towards her room. No sign of Kyo. Should I follow her? Would she even want to see me? The rat wondered. Hatori's words from earlier this evening came back to him: She doesn't hate you Yuki. There are really no set predictions to how this type of thing will affect someone. Before she gets better, she could get worse. Or she could wake up one day like nothing has happened and carry on like that for months. There's no way of knowing. She is feeling guilty and ashamed now, I have gotten her to tell me that much. Her feelings are really confused right now. The important thing to remember is to be there for her:. He nodded his head as if agreeing and looked back towards her room, Kyo still hadn't came out yet, so he headed down the stairs. She was doing dishes when he entered the kitchen. What is she doing washing dishes at this hour?
"Tohru-san?" Putting his hand on her shoulder. This action caused her to jump, tense up and drop the bowl she was drying as she spun around. "It's just me." His voice sounded loud in the tense air of the quiet kitchen. "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to scare you."
"Why did you sneak up behind me? Don't do that?" She cried out steadying her hands on the counter. She took a deep breath. This is Yuki, calm down. "Yuki-kun, I broke the bowl." She said quietly.
"Its okay" He answered seeing her distress. She was wearing her pajamas and an old robe. Her hair was matted from laying in bed all day. Her face was pale but her eyes were bloodshot and very dark underneath, there was no light coming form those brown eyes not tonight. Her small body, shook slightly. "Sit down, I'll clean it up." He said as he began to pick yup the pieces. Say something don't just come down here and scare her say something. "What are you doing up?" That's great, genius.
"I couldn't sleep anymore. The medicine wore off. And I tried to sleep but I don't want to close my eyes right now." Her voice trembling as she looked down at the table.
"Do you want some company?" He asked quietly. Standing near the table. When she didn't answer, he sat across from her. A couple of times he thought she was going to say something but she would shake her head and look back down at the table. The kettle whistled loudly causing her to jump. "I'll fix it for you." He heard her sigh as he began preparing the tea. He set her cup in front of her. Watching her wrap her hands around the warm cup, she inhaled the steam.
"Thank you Yuki-kun." Trying to smile. I need to be nicer to him. He won't look at me in the face, he probably thinks that I'm broken and damaged. And he is right. But he is still Yuki. And he is trying to night, I need to try to. But I wish he would look at me.
"Tohru-kun, the other night." Yuki began. "I'm sorry," taking a drink of tea, "I should have been there to pick you up, or called you at work and told you to wait inside. I'm sorry." He said simply looking out the window. If I look at her, in her eyes, I might see blame or hate. I don't want her to blame me.
"Where were you?" She asked quietly.
"I was still at the school, we were having to go over some plans for the class trip. I didn't think anything like this would have happened. I'm so stupid. If I had known I would have been there." He answered, thinking to himself the excuses though true sounded weak. They sat quietly for several minutes. Sipping the tea neither looking at each other.
"I know you would have protected me, if you had been there." She said rising from the table. " I'm going to finish the dishes." I know you wouldn't have let anyone hurt more. You cared about me as much as Kyo does. "I'm sorry too Yuki-san." She said as she began to put the dried dishes away.
"For what?" Looking up quickly his silver hair falling into his eyes. What on earth does she have to be sorry for.
"For everything." Was her answer, confusing the rat even more. But he was happy she was at least talking to him. He began to clear off the counters, throwing away several boxes of unidentifiable food. He watched her start wiping the counters and table at an almost maniac pace.
"I'm sorry too, Tohru-kun." He said gathering up the garbage in a new bag.
"I know, but you have nothing to be sorry for." She turned and looked at him. "I'm not mad at you Yuki-kun, not really and I don't hate you." She faltered, her lip began the trembling. "I just don't know what's going on. One minute I just want to cry, the next minute I want to scream. Sometimes my chest hurts so bad I can't breathe. One minute I want everyone to hug me, but then I get sick at the thought of people touching me. So I pull away. Kyo understands, I don't know if you do. I don't, I don't know how he does. I don't even know what I'm feeling anymore, or what I'm suppose to be feeling." She sank her knees in the floor leaning against the cabinet. "I wish he had just killed me." Dropping her head to her knees. "I hate myself, this wasn't your fault, or Kyo's or Shigure-sans. This was my fault."
Yuki walked over to where she was sitting, and knelt down beside her putting his hand on her shoulder. She was shaking. He didn't know what to say to make her feel better, but he had to try. "I'm glad he didn't kill you, Tohru. I would die if you were dead." She looked up at him, he kissed the top of her head. He hesitated a moment is the curse lifted for us all or just Kyo? He pulled her into an embrace.
Poof He was sitting beside her in rat form. I guess it was just Kyo.
"Yuki-kun, I'm sorry, I shouldn't have hugged you." She said picking up his small form in the palm of her hand.
"Don't be I just want us to stay friends." He said. She tried to smile again, but it died before reaching her eyes. I wonder if she will ever be able to smile like she used to. "You should go back to bed, you still need your rest." She nodded and sit him down.
"Thank you Yuki-kun." she said. He watched her leave the room.
poof He changed back. Why didn't it lift. I love her as much as that c..Kyo does. If not more, I loved her first. I've never hurt her, he has struck her before. I love her, so why isn't it enough.
AN: Okay, I feel better about myself now. Because I'm not a Yuki hater. In fact, there isn't a single character in this series that I don't like. I even like Akito. LOL…Anyway I will try to have another chapter up on Saturday, but it depends on how my life is going. Reviews are good, and very much appreciated. Thanks again everyone.