-1AN: As promised here is another personalized thank you…If I missed you this time around or the last time, I will get you. I promise. So without further ado, my thanks for the replies, reviews, and crits to Mew-Shara, Kikyomusdie, CrazyJGirl, Eclipseblood moon, YayforPie and StargazerBlue.

And a big thank you to all those who have read from the beginning of this and put up with my weekly updates.

This was another sucky week, as I was told that there wasn't enough psychical evidence to win a conviction, so the bastard was just charged with assault and battery. But anyway on to Tohru's Story.

Chapter 15: Alone

The sun was coming in the window when Tohru woke with a start. She glanced beside her, empty, Kyo must have already left. She laid back down on the pillows that he had slept on inhaling his smell. Kyo you're cured. Your curse is broke. You won't need me anymore. The girl thought sadly. It would be selfish to want to stay with you now, to want you by my side now. I used to wonder, I used to want you or Yuki to be my first real kiss, I wondered what it would be like to have you hold me, like they do in the movies. Now even thinking about those things, makes me sick and shaky. Kyo, you can have a normal life now, but I can't give you that normal life. She got up and looked in the mirror. For a few seconds she was in shock, she put her hand to head and pulled on the short, uneven strands. My hair, did I really do that to my hair?

"Oh you're up?" Shigure said from behind her. He watched as the girl jumped slightly. Don't worry Tohru, he won't hurt you again. He smiled at the memory of the guys screams.

"Yes, I'll um I'll make you some breakfast", bowing slightly. I've been to much of a burden to everyone in this house as it is.

"No worries, Kyo fixed some pancakes, before he left. He said you showed him how." The dog replied smiling. "How are you feeling this morning, Tohru-kun?"

"Tired." She answered nervously tugging on her shortened hair.

"Would you like me to take you to the beauty shop later today?" Watching her as she ran her hands through it several times.

"No, No, that would be No. I'll have Uo-chan or Hana-chan even it up." She wrapped her robe around her and looked up at Shigure. He was smiling and leaning against the door, but he had dark circles under his eyes and looked tired. He stifled a yawn with his hand, then she noticed his knuckles, they were scrapped and sore looking "What happened to your hand Shigure-san?"

"Oh nothing much sometimes I really just feel like hitting things, its good to let it out every now and then." Winking at her, tiring his best to coach her into a real smile. "Tohru-kun? You wouldn't mind if I went back to bed for a little while and left you on your own" Yawning again. "I was out to late."

"Oh yes" Trying to sound cheerful. "Don't let me keep you up." Giving the writer her best impersonation of her old smile.

He smiled back at her and scuffed her hair. "Its cute." Then made his way down the hall.

She smiled at the memory of Kyo and showing him how to make pancakes this past summer. She glanced around, they even cleaned up some. She fixed herself a cup of tea and went out to the front porch to sit.

The sky was starting to cloud up, but the air was still warm bordering on hot. Her mind was a swirl of confusion, the one question that had plagued her since last night, when she fell asleep against Kyo. Do I stay or do I go? I want to cling to him, I love him, there I admit it I love Kyo, I'm in love with him. I want to stay here with them, they are my family. But am I really being fair to them? She drifted off further into her own mind as it began to rain. Her body shivered slightly as it began to register to the cool drops. She glanced up towards the trees then to the sky. WHY? WHY? A broken hearted, animal-like scream tore itself from her throat, as it began to rain harder. Her skin was soon soaked through her clothes, her hair matted to her head. She walked farther into the yard, not really thinking just riding the pain. The tears were mixed with the late summer rain. When she reached the border of the yard, she fell to her knees another scream tore from her throat as she began tearing at the grass. 'Its good to let it out every now and then.' And she gave herself completely over to the pain and rage as it coursed through her body.

Hatori pulled his car into Shigures small driveway. He was shocked at the sight of Tohru, walking in the rain completely soaked. Aayame had called him this morning and told him about her hair.

"Tohru-san?" He said approaching the girl. She looked up at him, but said nothing. "Can we go in and talk? I don't want you catching a cold?"

She looked at he sky oddly as if remembering something. "Haru was right it is refreshing." She giggled slightly.

Hatori couldn't hide the shocked look he gave her. He was more worried everyday, that she was slipping farther away until no one could reach her. "Come on" as he guided her towards the house.

"Hatori, I'm leaving." She stated simply when they got on the porch.

"Leaving?" the doctor asked and moved in front of the steps. "When? Why? Thoru are you ok?"

"I think I might be." She answered. "I have thought and thought, Hatori-san. And I'm not doing anyone any good. Kyo-kun is better, he doesn't need me anymore." Letting Hatori, push her gently into the house.

"Kyo, still needs you." Going to the bathroom to get a couple of towels. "Where would you go?" Handing her one.

"I have some money saved up enough to get a room at a small boarding house in town." She chose to ignore the comment about Kyo needing her. Who would need me now? That may have been true in the past, but not now,

"We all need you." Shigure said coming down the stairs, he had overheard the whole conversation. "But if you really feel like you have to go. I won't stop you. I will ask you to please come back."

She began to cry. I really ,really don't want to leave but I have to. Please try to understand. "There is a small boarding house, I can afford, its about 4 miles from the school. I can get something better though once I find a new job." Her eyes were sad but determined. "Hatori could you take me there on your way back to your office?"

"Tohru. I don't know if you should be alone." The dragon began slowly watching her face. She just started at him, in that instant in her eyes, he knew if he didn't take her she might try to walk there. Her eyes were pleading with him softly. Those brown eyes so much like Kana's after the accident, they were broken. I won't let her give up, like Kana did, I won't lose her too. "I will take you there under these conditions." He leaned forward slightly in his chair. "You will call me or Shigure, daily, in the mornings so we know you are okay. And you will either come to my office or I will come to your place once a week to check on you."

She nodded and headed for the stairs. "I'll be ready in an hour." I know I should tell Yuki and Kyo bye, but I couldn't that would hurt to bad, I'll write them each a note. She changed quickly out of the wet clothes and began throwing things into her small bags.

"Are you sure this is a good idea, Hari?" Shigure asked, leaning up against the door smoking and watching the rain.

"No" lighting a cigarette of his own. "But we can't force her to stay, she was alone when you found her. She has always been independent. Right? Some people need that alone time. She needs to do whatever it takes to get her back to herself." He leaned back against his chair, blowing the smoke up at the ceiling. "But that's why I'm dropping her off, so I know where she is at. And that's why we'll be checking up on her."

They sat in silence for the next few minutes, finishing their cigarettes. They both wondered briefly how the boys would take the news. And who would tell them. Then they heard her coming down the stairs. She didn't come back into the living room, she stood at the door with two small bags. Shigure thought she looked quite a lot like what he imagined a child would look like when they were forcing themselves to go bravely into the doctors office. She looked alone and afraid.

"Tohru?" He asked softly, his brown eyes looking like a concerned puppy. "Are you sure?"

She gave him a bittersweet smile. "I'll be fine, Shigure." As she walked out the door. "There's something on my on the bed for Kyo, Yuki and you."

Hatori followed her out the door. "If you want I can hide you a few days at my office, if you don't want to be alone, but want some quiet." He smiled slightly. I don't really want you alone.

She didn't answer the doctor till they reached town. "I think that's what I need right now." She didn't look at him, but began to give him directions to the house. "Thank you." Almost jumping out of the car as it stopped. "No no Hatori-san, I have worked you to death. I can do this myself." She shut the doors and gathered her bags. He watched her as she walked into the boarding house without a glance backwards, briefly wondering if he would ever see her again.

She checked in and paid for a month. That should be long enough. She thought as she walked down the cluttered hallway. She unlocked the door to her room. The room smelt musty and a bit like old fish, glancing around the décor wouldn't do much for anyone's mood. It was small the walls a plain brown. There was a small desk and wardrobe for her clothes. A mini kitchen, not big enough to do any real cooking, in the middle of the room an old twin bed sat. She sat down on the old dirty brown cover and fought back tears. No more tears. This is what I need. I need to make myself not need anyone. I need this. I need to be alone. I have to prove this to myself. She sighed as she opened the bags and began to unpack. She stopped as she reached a picture of her Yuki and Kyo. It had been taken by someone else perhaps Shigure at the Lake house. They had been walking back from the Lake, each boy was holding her hand. Kyo looked pissed off at the world and Yuki had a far-off look in his eyes. She put the picture in the bottom on the desk. I have to do this alone.