Author's Notes-I know I know, j00 ppl r all like "OMG! AZNINK IS UPDATING! WTF! ITS DA LAST SIGN OF THE APOCOLYPSE, WE'RE ALL GONNA DIE!" XD yeah….so bows low GOMEN NASAI! TT da pain of not having enough soda for inspiration…This is also a piece of crap…crappier than the usually piece of crap j00 ppl hafta bear with than usual…so please…don't beat meh! runs away
Disclaimer- I DOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOONT OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOWN NAAAAAAARUTOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOoOoOoOoOo!11!11111!1! HOO HAH! starts to cut self in corner for not owning naruto
Ramen Bowl 16
"Sasuke!" whined Sakura, "can you please just tell me why you did what you did?"
Sasuke squinted his eyes as he sighed inwardly. He picked up a piece of octopus from his ramen bowl and bit through it with annoyance. He ignored Sakura.
Sakura frowned, Sasuke was being more distant usual. Was he embarrassed at what happened? Her stomach growled. Her frown deepened, she hated sitting at the Ramen Bar and not being able to eat. She was still on her diet for beauty, and it was killing her!
"SASUKE…," whined Sakura a bit louder, "just tell me why and I'll leave! I promise!"
Sasuke's eyes twitched as he chewed on the piece of octopus, which was now completely mush in his mouth. He really had NO idea what Sakura was talking about. He hadn't done anything out of the ordinary lately.
Unless…
Sasuke's mouth stopped chewing the poor cooked octopus. His eye's widened.
No…could she…have?
Sasuke swallowed the mushy octopus.
Impossible! He's been keeping that secret! Not even Itachi or that creepy stalker Orochimaru could have known!
Sasuke started sweating beads and his whole body was tense.
Sakura took quick notice to this.
"Sasuke! Are you alright? You're all sweaty and clammy!" worried Sakura as she touched Sasuke's forehead.
Sasuke suddenly snapped away from Sakura's touch and stared at her with wide eyes.
"H-how did y-you know t-that!" gasped Sasuke, "H-how did you find out!"
Sakura backed off a bit, "Um…well…you see…um…I…" Sakura faltered a bit, she didn't want to let Sasuke know she has been stalking him for a few months now.
"H-how did y-you know t-the o-old women pornography!"
Sakura froze. Her face turned white. Her eyes grew to epic proportions worthy for world records. Everything stopped. The entire world froze.
"What?" whispered Sakura.
Sasuke blanked, "How d-did y-you find out! Tell me! I m-must know!"
"What?" whispered Sakura a bit louder.
Sasuke started shaking Sakura, "HOW DID YOU KNOW! Tell me for the love of Kami!"
"I-I didn't!"
Sasuke stopped shaking Sakura, "What?" Something was seriously and was also very wrong here. That wasn't what she was asking about?
Sasuke's grip tightened on Sakura and his hands started shaking horribly. He whispered in a scratchy voice, "W-what…are you saying? T-that, you didn't know about…the…porn?"
Sakura was scared by Sasuke's actions and voice, like hell she cared right now that he was about half a centimeter away from her face!
Sasuke's hands clenched Sakura's arm's extremely tightly. His entire body shook horribly like he was in the Snow Country naked.
Sasuke's mind raced through a million thoughts, should he kill her? No, that would attract attention. Should he cut off her vocal cords? No, than she can still write…but than he can cut off her hands…
Sasuke stood there blankly, going through millions of scenarios, he had to do something.
Sakura all the meanwhile, was stunned and scared at the same time. Sasuke's grip was starting to hurt her too. She wasn't to clear on what happened…but she didn't really want to believe that Sasuke liked old women pornography. Sakura's internal self shuddered…
The two of them remained in that position for a while. Sasuke going over his scenarios and thoughts, and Sakura thinking that the world has ended since Sasuke clearly wasn't into young people like her.
Suddenly Naruto and Ino walked up to them.
Naruto was the first to notice that Sasuke was gripping Sakura very hard, and than Ino was to realized that Sakura was so close together.
Sasuke looked over at them with his wide eyes trembling. His face had a large smile.
"Yes…," muttered Sasuke, "I must dispose of this…"
"Oh!" Naruto suddenly piped up to the muttering Sasuke and the stunned Sakura, "I'm announcing that Ino and me are now happily dating! And that Akamaru is happily holding Ino's baby!"
Sakura's eyes twitched, did her ears hear right? Naruto and Ino were together! And that Akamaru was pregnant with Ino's baby!
Suddenly Shino jumped down from the roof of the Ramen Bar and landed in between the four people that were previously on the ground in front of the Bar.
The four of them stared at Shino quietly.
Shino coughed.
The four of them kept on staring.
Shino quietly said, "Guys…I don't how to say this…but I guess the time is right…"
Sasuke took out a kunai and started stroking it, "Yes…yes my lovely, soon they will all be gone...and nobody will know my horny little secret…"
Shino ignored Sasuke, "I'm becoming Jiraya's apprentice, I will return in four years as the new heir of the Icha Icha Paradise! I shall be known as the Bug Pimp Writer!"
TenTen suddenly hopped over the fence that was across from the Ramen Bar, "And I would like to say that I'm emo!"
Everybody turned to stare at TenTen.
After a moment of silence, TenTen blushed, "Well…not really…," she kicked up a little bit of dirt, "I just wanted some a character background story on me for once…"
Suddenly out of the blue, Konohamaru walked up the road to greet the now multiple people standing in front of the Ramen Bar.
"Hi everybody! I would like to say I like wearing women's underwear!" With that, Konohamaru walked down the road off into the distance.
Everybody stood there once again very silent.
Sasuke shuddered, blood will rain today...------------------------
Anko suddenly woke up from her deep slumber with a snort. She looked up sleepily and surveyed her surroundings. She was still at the Ramen Bar…
She blinked sleepily. Maybe having so many bowls of this Sake Ramen stuff isn't all that healthy for a jounin ninja…she shrugged. But in all due seriousness, that was a whacked out dream!
Anko stood up and yawned, tossing some bills on the counter of the Ramen Bar counter. Right before she was about to leave, she noticed that Tsunade was asleep on the counter. There was about fifty or more so bowls of finished ramen in front of her, and from the smell of it, which was sake, Tsunade was probably drunk off her ass.
"No Orochimaru, I don't want to sleep with Itachi yet, I want to eat Hinata first with some Gai…," muttered Tsunade sleepily.
Anko's eyes squinted, but she ignored it and walked off, the Hokage's dream couldn't have been as weird as hers…-----------------------------
Kiba woke up suddenly from the counter of the Ramen Bar and looked around wildly.
"Holy Crap!" He said outloud to nobody in particular, "That was one weird dream! I'm never eating Sake Ramen again!"
"You said it," said Hinata groggily from the of Kiba.
Kiba looked over to see Hinata with lots of one dollar bills stuffed inside the hood of her jacket.
"What…," began Kiba.
Hinata held up a hand to stop Kiba, her face was beet red from the sake ramen, "Look, I don't know…and I don't really want to know either…I'm just going to go home and see if I'm still a virgin or not," with that, Hinata stumbled off back towards the direction of her home.
Kiba rubbed the back of his head, that was seriously a weird dream…---------------
Rock Lee suddenly awoke from his nap. He looked around to see that Gai, Neji, and TenTen were on the ground, all beaten up, and that all of the surrounding area was completely destroyed.
Rock Lee immediately rushed over to Gai, "GAI SENSEI! WHAT HAPPENED! WHO HAS DONE THIS HORRIBLE CRIME TO OUR TEAM!"
Gai was knocked out and frothing from the mouth, so he couldn't respond to Lee.
Neji suddenly looked over at TenTen weakly, "TenTen, next time you decide to experiment with Lee's alcohol capacity with Sake Ramen, remind me to slap you."
TenTen could only nod in agreement.
End
;; I'm very sorry for writing such a shitty story, but in all due seriousness, I'm just a lazy son of a bitch that has no motivation anymore…I'm not sure if I'll continue this story any more…but there IS way to ensure the continuation of this story, and that IS TO GIVE ME REVIEWS!