Meredith: I'm sorry…about today…I didn't want things to happen that way…so…
Derek: Really? I thought it went well…I got to see you…AND your new friend.
Meredith: Derek…
Derek: I'm curious, exactly how is the best way for a man to find out that his wife is with someone else and wants a divorce? A postcard? An email? Or maybe she could just hide for two years…two very long, painful years and then leave the divorce papers for him at her mother's nursing home? Because after all divorce papers pretty much say it all…they're pretty much self explanatory. Which is WHY…there's nothing else for us to discuss here…so…if you'll excuse me…
(He walked to the bar…sat next to an attractive brunette…pretending to hang on her every word…buying her drinks. Meredith tried to focus her attention on Izzy and Alex…wanting to apologize to them…wanting to know how Lexzie had been. Meredith didn't even know that they had a second daughter as well. The more alcohol Derek consumed the more physical things got with the girl at the bar…they were sitting close…their faces nearly touching as they talked.)
Derek: (he could see Meredith watching them out of the corner of his eye…his heart not really into flirting with the girl) Listen…I have to work early in the morning, so I'm going to get going.
Girl: (still flirting…hoping he would change his mind) I was just heading out too…maybe we could share a cab?
Derek: (he hated to use the girl, but knowing Meredith was watching he went along with it…helping the girl on with her coat…following her outside…his eyes met Meredith…he thought he saw a hint of jealousy on Meredith's face…he grabbed his coat from her table and headed outside. The girl was waiting in the backseat of the cab…he was tempted…he hadn't been with anyone since Meredith left…in his mind and in his heart he was still married. Obviously she hadn't waited, so he was tempted to leave with the girl…but the events of the day had been too much…he couldn't.)
Derek: You go ahead…I need to head back to the hospital before I head home…I'll catch the next cab.
Girl: I can wait…if you want.
Derek: I don't think so… (he closed the door to the cab…watching it pull off. Meredith walked out of the bar as the cab was pulling away…he dug in his pocket for his keys and headed to his car.)
Meredith: You probably shouldn't be driving.
Derek: (muttering under his breath) What do you care? (she followed him toward his car…fumbling with his keys he dropped them…both bending down, she grabbed them first…)
Meredith: Actually, there are a few things I'd like to get from the house…nothing of yours, just a few things of my mothers if you still have them, so I can drive you and then I'll take a cab back to my hotel…if that's ok…
Derek: Hotel…I thought you were leaving?
Meredith: He had to go…I'm going to visit with my mother for a few days…and finalize some things…so…
(by finalize he knew she meant their divorce, but didn't have the strength to argue about it…he was emotionally wiped out…and half drunk…so he climbed into the passenger seat and rode in silence…he closed his eyes…wanting her to think he was sleeping so she wouldn't say anything…he couldn't listen to her talk about finalizing things, and taking her things from their house, and "he had to go"…knowing that "he" was her new boyfriend, probably going to be her new husband…he was relieved as the car came to a stop, not wanting to think about her starting a new life with someone else…he opened his eyes, expecting that she had driven him home…forgetting that she thought he still lived at their home…she had driven them there instead.)
Derek: I…uh…I don't live here anymore.
Meredith: What?
Derek: I mean, your stuff is still here, but I moved back to the property after you…uh…a long time ago I built a place on my land.
Meredith: Oh…I didn't realize…well, is it ok if I get a few things…or would you rather I wait?
Derek: No…go for it…take everything…
Meredith: I don't want everything…I just want what's mine…
Derek: (his stare met hers…a heavy sigh) Yeah…me too. I guess we don't always get what we want. (he grabbed the keys from the ignition and headed inside. He sat on the couch in the living room…didn't even bother to turn on the light…in the dark sat and waited for her to gather her things…so she could walk back out of his life just as quickly as she'd come back in. He waited for what seemed like hours…he had already waited for her for 2 years…he was tired of waiting…decided to see how much longer she'd be and maybe he'd take a cab home…he slowly made his way upstairs…remembering back to the late nights when he'd come home from the hospital and quietly make his way up the stairs to find her sleeping peacefully in their room…it had always been the best part of his day…crawling into bed with her…he shook the memories out of his head…reaching the top of the stairs he saw her take a deep breath and open the door to the baby's room. He felt that familiar lump in his throat…he was tempted to head back downstairs to give her some privacy…but as he heard her tiny sobs from inside the nursery he instinctively went to her…her back was to him…standing in front of the empty crib, holding the tiny blue blanket to her face as she sobbed…she glanced at the nightstand…picking up the frame with the picture of her and Derek…his hand protectively resting on her very pronounced baby bump…both smiling from ear to ear…the picture was taken sometime in her third trimester…not long before it happened…not long before everything changed. Her head dropped memories flashing through her head of the ultrasound, the delivery, the funeral…she heard him sobbing quietly behind her…startled she dropped the picture, the glass shattering as it hit the floor…neither noticed…they just stood for a moment, looking at each other…he wanted to be angry with her…wished he could hate her…but at that moment she wasn't the woman who had walked out on him, she wasn't the woman who was divorcing him…she was a mother…the mother of his child…their child that she had carried for 8 ½ months and then lost, the woman who had been forced to bury her child, been forced to leave the hospital without a baby, and come home to look at the empty nursery. She fell to her knees starting to pick up the pieces of shattered glass…he rushed over to take the broken frame from her hands…setting it on the ground…he brushed the stray hair from her eyes…instinctively wiping a tear from her cheek…she began to cry harder and he couldn't take it…he grabbed her hand and pulled her into his arms.)
Derek: It's ok…you're ok….(she shook gently in his arms as she cried for hours…finally cried out she sat up…smoothing out her hair…swatting away her tears. He wasn't sure what to do, so started picking up the tiny shards of glass from the broken frame.)
Derek: Damn…(she looked down…seeing the tiny trickle of blood running down his finger.)
Meredith: Oh…
Derek: I'm fine…(he stood…she ran ahead of him to the master bathroom…digging through the closet for a bandaid…he washed the cut in the bathroom sink…she took his left hand…patting it dry, she carefully wrapped the bandaid around his finger…his ring finger…her eyes fixed on the wedding band still securely placed there. Without realizing it her thumb slid back and forth across the ring…her mind flashing back to the day she put it on his hand. Her mind snapping back to reality as she glanced down at the empty finger on her left hand…she noticed him staring at her hand as well.)
Derek: I guess I can take this off now. (he slid the ring off, placing it on the shelf in the bathroom and with a heavy sigh he walked out.)
(She followed him down to the living room…he was putting on his coat)
Derek: Listen, I'm fine to drive, so I'm gonna go…your car is in the garage, so you can take that back to your hotel, or you can stay here…whatever…but I'm gonna go. (he turned to leave, his back still to her) I'll have my attorney read through the papers first thing in the morning and I'll drop them by here…I'm sure there are more things that you need to get so you can pick them up here.)
Meredith: It was…uh…it was good to see you. (his back still to her…he walked out.)
(Neither got any sleep…she flipped through old photos…wandered through the house…she had forgotten how much she loved this house…how happy she had been here…how happy they had been. It was literally as if she had just left…she recognized her handwriting on the notepad by the phone where she had scribbled a phone message for him…a reminder hanging on the fridge of a hair appointment she had made, but never kept…a bottle of wine on the counter that he had purchased the week she left for them to celebrate their anniversary the following week. It was as if she had just left yesterday, and today she came back…but she hadn't just left yesterday…it had been nearly 2 years…2 years she had let him suffer…and wonder…and now it was too late…she had hurt him too much to just waltz back into his house…into his life…as if nothing had happened…it was too late, wasn't it? She sat on the couch…exhausted…she must have drifted off to sleep. He wasn't so lucky…sitting on the porch of his cabin…drinking…his mind racing through memories of all of their years together…of the painful memories of the last two years without her…of wondering where she was…and now he knew where she was…and yet he was still sitting here alone. He thought about going back to the house to see if she was still there…but what would it accomplish…what would he say…she was with someone else…she had moved on…it was too late, wasn't it? (he must have drifted off to sleep in his chair on the porch…he awoke to a car door slamming…opening his eyes to see her walking up the porch steps the next morning.)
Meredith: Hey.
Derek: Hey. (he sat up…straightening his clothes…picking up the empty bottles from the night before and carrying them into the cabin…she followed.)
Meredith: This place is great….the cabin is so…you.
Derek: Yeah.
Meredith: I hope it's ok that I came by…my flight's not until tomorrow morning…and I don't have any friends in Seattle anymore…and my mother obviously doesn't know who I am…so I just thought I'd come see this place…and now I'm rambling…so I'll just shut up…
Derek: (laughing) It's fine…look around if you like…I'm gonna jump in the shower.
Meredith: Ok. (she walked back onto the porch…looking out at the water…he watched through the window as she walked along the water's edge…tugging at his heart as she knelt by Doc's grave. He wanted to stay and watch her…couldn't take his eyes off of her really…but he forced himself to jump in the shower. He rifled through his drawers for some clean jeans…he remembered most were in the laundry…not used to having a woman around he headed down to the laundry room without thinking…wearing only a towel around his waist. She was looking through the fridge as he walked by…spotting him in his towel she jumped.)
Meredith: OH…sorry…I…uh…I thought maybe I could make you breakfast or something.
Derek: By "make you breakfast" do you mean dump the cereal and milk in a bowl, because you don't cook.
Meredith: Ok, fine…I was hoping maybe you could make me breakfast…I'm starved. Never mind…I'll pick something up later. (she started to put the eggs back in the fridge, but he stepped toward her, taking them from her hand)
Derek: It's fine…I'll make you something…(he noticed her looking down at his bare chest…suddenly conscious of the fact that he was half naked…he backed away) I'll just go throw on some clothes first.
Meredith: Yeah…ok. (he disappeared into the laundry room and returned wearing only an old pair of jeans…no shirt...she caught herself staring, and forced her eyes away, hopping up onto the counter to watch as he made breakfast. As angry as he was with her, he was surprised at how easily the conversation flowed…she wanted to know what all of her friends had been up to…and how things were at the hospital…they talked about everything except themselves…ate breakfast…walked around the property…she walked out onto the dock that he had built…turned around with that huge smile that had always taken his breath away…)
Meredith: I just can't get over how much you've done around here…it's beautiful…
Derek: Yeah, well, I've had a lot of free time. (the smile vanished at the jab, but he wasn't sorry, she deserved it, and she knew it. They walked back up to the cabin) I have to go in to the hospital for a couple of hours…do you want to come? I'm sure everyone would love to see you.
Meredith: (she rolled her eyes) I doubt it.
Derek: (the wind blowing her hair in her face, he tucked it behind her ear for her…his hand softly grazing her cheek) They would…a lot of people have waited a long time…hoped for a long time that you'd come back. (he forced a half smile…and then forced himself to walk back inside…not willing to let her see the tears in his eyes that she put there.)