See prologue for disclaimer. Thanks for the feedback. More please!
Chapter 14
I opened my eyes to see Hal staring over me where I lay on floor. His expression was worried, but it relaxed when he saw me open my eyes. He turned to someone next to him, an older man with graying hair wearing a uniform. I think he was park security. Hal was telling the man, "She just has a little heat exhaustion." Hal had pressed a cool, wet napkin to my forehead and wrists.
I struggled to sit up and the security guy said, "Easy, Honey," while reaching to support my shoulders and back. I made it up and accepted the drink that Hal put to my lips. After a few moments, they helped me to my seat. I looked around and realized we were still in the cafeteria dining area. I tried to gather my wits. How had I ended up on the floor?
Memory crashed in on me and I squashed down the panic.
I had passed out. Ranger's married.
Surely I'd heard Hal wrong.
Ranger's married. I was gonna pass out again. Black dots danced in my vision and my blood roared in my ears. Ranger's married chanted through my head.
Hal's voice penetrated my fog, "Breathe, Stephanie."
I pulled in a breath and the spinning in my head slowed and the pain in my chest eased.
"I think I want to leave," I said in a small voice. Hal nodded. He spoke quietly with the security man. Hal helped me to stand and guided me outside to a golf cart that security used to maneuver through the park.
Hal had his arm wrapped around my shoulders and I think if he hadn't, I would have slumped back down to the ground. Ranger's married, the refrain continued. I was only vaguely aware that the security guard was driving us through the behind-the-scenes areas of the park toward the parking lot.
Ranger's married. When? What? Why? When?
Ranger's married, the litany sounded. Ranger's married. The last I must have spoken aloud because Hal's head bent down to mine and he said, "Shh, Stephanie. Easy. You're gonna be okay."
A few minutes later, we were at the Jeep. Hal lifted me into my seat and buckled me in. I heard him thank the security guard, he got in and we left.
I don't know if I slept on the way home or if I was just catatonic, but I don't remember anything between the park and my apartment. I only knew one thing, Ranger was married and I wanted to die.
Okay, so that was two things.
I was dimly aware that Hal carried me up to my apartment and put me in bed, removing my shoes. He brought me a glass of water and sat on the edge of the bed.
"Stephanie," Hal whispered. "I'm so sorry. I thought you knew."
I looked at him a moment. "I know," I replied, my voice rusty. "I'm sorry, Hal. I didn't mean to ruin our day."
"Me neither, Steph," Hal said sadly. "Do you need anything else?"
"No. I need to be alone. Please?"
Hall nodded. He leaned over me and kissed my cheek. I waited until I heard the door close and then the tears came. Great, huge sobs that shuddered though my body. I couldn't breathe and I didn't care. There was a hole in my chest. I cried until my throat was raw and my face was swollen. And then I cried some more. I cried until my body gave out and I escaped into blissfully unaware sleep.
oooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
I felt a cool wash cloth on my forehead when I regained consciousness. I opened my eyes to see warm green eyes looking back at me.
"Lester, what are you doing here?" I asked sullenly.
"I'm here because Hal told me what happened. I'm here because I care about you and I want to take care of you. I'm here because I won't let you make yourself sick over this."
I rolled away from him and buried my head in my pillow. "Go away."
"No."
"You're so damn stubborn."
"You are too, Sweetheart."
I sniffled, "Am I the last to know?"
"I guess so. It wasn't widely publicized, but Hal thought you knew."
"Did you?" I mumbled into my pillow.
"No, I didn't think you were acting like you knew."
"When?"
Lester understood what I meant. "We didn't find out until a couple of weeks ago. Though I think Tank probably knew before that," he paused. "Sweetheart, they've been married for almost six months," he said tentatively as if afraid I'd freak.
"Six months," I wailed. Then wail ended in another sob. He had been married all this time. He must have been dating her when he and I were still… well… when we were whatever we'd been. Friends plus.
"Ugh!" I yelled. "I can't believe him, that piece of shit! He…" I was going to say that he'd lied to me. I thought for a minute. Had he lied to me? Maybe only his love for me didn't come with a ring. Maybe his life didn't lend itself to a relationship with me. No. No he never lied. He never promised me anything and he never lied.
But, I, I had loved him and he was married now. What did that woman have that I didn't? Well maybe she didn't blow up Ranger's cars, endanger his men, screw up her life and job and maybe, just maybe, she wasn't an emotional basket case.
I sobbed again into my pillow, completely forgetting that Lester was there until I felt his hand rubbing circles on my back.
"Why?" I choked out.
"I don't know, Sweetheart."
"Have you met her?"
"Once. She came to the RangeMan building once and I met her then."
I turned my head to look at Lester. "What's so great about her?"
"I don't know, Steph. She was nice enough, but I don't know why he'd choose anyone over you," he said sincerely, his hand smoothing the hair from my face. "You are so special, Sweetheart. And whatever else may be true, I know Ranger cares about you. I don't know why he did what he did and I don't know why he didn't tell you, aside from the fact that he is just so damned secretive." Lester reclined on the bed next to me, propped up against my extra pillows. He pulled me into his arms and I slid into his comforting embrace. He let me sob on his shoulder and crooned soothing words, wrapping his arms around me.
We lay like that for long minutes, until I calmed, my breath coming easier, the pain in my chest easing. Lester's arms were around me and my head was pillowed on his strong chest. Without thinking, I traced my fingers up the ridges of his abs, feeling his muscles rippling in response. I slid my hand slowly up his chest, over collarbone and behind his head. I pulled his head toward me as I lifted mine toward him. I could feel his eyes on me, but I avoided looking at him. I kissed him, softly, tentatively at first, then more demandingly. I threw my left leg over his body so that I was straddling him, resting in his lap, my hands still holding his head to mine.
Lester's hands were on my hips, unmoving, holding me still. He was kissing me back but I could feel his reservation.
I slid my hands down his chest and down further between our bodies reaching for Lester's hard shaft. Lester gently pulled my hands away, holding my wrists gently in each of his hands.
He eased out of the kiss. "Sweetheart. Stephanie." I looked up at him. He took a breath. "I want you. I want you so much it hurts. But, it can't happen like this. I won't take advantage of you and I won't let you take advantage of me, tempting though you are. When I make love with you, it will only be about you and me."
He kissed me again, with less heat now, taking the sting out of his rejection. He rolled us so we were on our sides facing each other and he pressed soft kissed on my face. He stroked down my back with calming strokes and asked, "Do you want food or do you want to sleep?"
"Sleep."
"Okay, Sweetheart. Why don't you change into something more comfortable and I'll be right back." I changed out of my shorts and shirt and into a big comfy sleep shirt and I went to the bathroom to wash my face.
Lester returned with a cup of tea and lemon. I drank it under his watchful eye.
Lester held the covers back and I settled in. He tucked them around me and kissed my forehead, drew my window shades and turned out the light.
"Sleep tight, Sweetheart."
"Les," I called as he reached the door. "Would you hold me? Please? At least 'til I fall asleep."
"Sure, Sweetheart," he said and lay back down on the bed on top of the covers, gathering me into his arms. I fell asleep, my head resting on Lester's shoulder, my hand covering his heart.