Trust
Star Trek Voyager Fan Fiction
Season 5/6
Captain Kathryn Janeway had one goal – get her crew and ship back home. The Captain puts her mission above everything else, but would that also stop her from falling in love?
No copyright infringement intended. Purely for fun.
Written by LaughingLee (First fan fiction :)
CHAPTER 2
"Are you trying to skip out on this mandatory social event?"
Janeway turned quickly, slightly embarrassed. She had been standing outside the small Irish pub, debating whether to go in and get out quickly or to leave the holodeck before anyone sees her.
"The Captain does expect all of us to mingle," Ensign Lee reprimanded Janeway with a mock scowl. "It's apparently good for the crew to gather in random holodeck programs and socialise – even though we spend every other waking moment with each other."
"Are you trying to hide the fact that you weren't going in either?" Captain Janeway put her hands on her hip. "As you said, it is a direct order from the Captain."
"I would never try to hide anything from the Captain," Ensign Lee replied, not missing a beat. "I can honestly tell you that I will not be going in. I'm heading to a much smaller and shabbier pub. Care to join me? They have a dart board and I don't think anyone else knows about it." Janeway spared one last glance at the pub before following Lee down the street.
"How have you been?" Lee asked as they rounded the next bend. They hadn't seen each other in the past few weeks besides the occasional engineering meeting.
"All right, thank you," Janeway replied. "I don't feel like a lot of people tonight, though."
"Same here."
"But, I heard that Ensign Lee Roberts is the life of the party," Janeway smiled, prodding Lee slightly with her elbow. "Always full of energy and lots of laughs."
"True," Lee grinned. "But, I need to get that energy from somewhere. So every now and then, when I'm a bit down, I try and get away from everybody and just relax."
"You, depressed? I almost can't believe that."
"No one ever does," Lee replied softly, but quickly smiled again. "So, Captain Janeway, are you a good loser? I do plan on beating you at every darts game this evening."
"I'm not sure, Ensign, I've never lost anything," Janeway replied, glad that it got a laugh from the younger woman. Her whispered remark had not gone unnoticed.
"Fighting words, Captain. Good, I love a challenge!"
Lee stepped forward and opened a small wooden door. They had turned down an alley Janeway had never noticed before in this holoprogram. Janeway went through murmuring her thanks to Lee and scanned the dusty interior. It was a tiny bar with only four stools in front of the raised wooden counter and a few tables scattered throughout the room. It looked well-kept, but very old and disused. There was a roaring fire in the one corner with the dart board to the right of it. It seemed they were they only patrons.
"Charming," Janeway remarked. "I can't for the life of me think why I haven't come here before."
"Very funny, give it a chance," Lee said and walked to the bar. "Nick, can we have a pint and two glasses, please. And, bring out the darts as well."
"Aye, lass," a voice rumbled from a door behind the counter. A wizened, silver-haired old man came out. "You brought a lady friend? Didn't know ye had any."
"You're such a gentleman, Nick," Lee laughed. "This is Kathryn. We felt like a bit of peace and quiet and needed someone place nice to go to. Since I couldn't find anywhere else I thought we'd come here. Do you mind?"
"You're such a lark, lass," Nick replied with a toothy grin. He handed Lee a pitcher and two glasses. "The darts are in the board. Enjoy." And with a nod to Janeway, he shuffled to the back again.
"Kathryn?" Janeway asked as they headed to the table. Lee slowly started pouring two glasses.
"Do you mind? If you prefer, I can call you Captain Janeway. I didn't mean to offend you, it just came out."
Kathryn laughed at the flustered young woman. She took a glass and clinked it against Lee's. "Kathryn is fine. We're off duty and I plan to beat you as myself, not the Captain."
"Great," Lee answered and held up her glass. "To friends and darts!"
"Hear, hear," Kathryn replied and the women took a swig of their beer. "Wow, this is quite strong."
"Yes, I know it's still synthenol, but it tastes better than the usual stuff."
Kathryn carefully put the glass down. She'll have to watch herself. She wants to keep a professional distance, but somehow she finds herself immensely enjoying Lee's company. When last did you enjoy an evening out, Kathryn berated herself. Relax for once and have fun.
Lee opened the board and started taking stock of the darts. Some were old and a bit frayed. They divided the good and bad darts equally between them. After some debate about who would go first, with rank and age jokes coming from Lee, Kathryn decided to throw first.
"That's great," Lee replied and wrote the score with a piece of chalk on the board next to the darts. "We'll play to 200. Best of three?"
"Fine by me," Kathryn replied. "Should be a very short game, then."
"Don't be so sure," Lee said and stood in front of the board. Her throw went completely to the right and bounced against the wall. Kathryn had to keep from smiling. "Wait, I had a muscle spasm, I'll go again." Lee's next throw was a bit better, but still bounced off the chalk slate next to the dart board.
"Damn, this is much harder than I thought it would be," Lee said with a frown.
"You haven't played before?" Kathryn said, laughing even more when Lee shook her head sheepishly. "What was all that talk about beating me?"
"I was bluffing," Lee grinned. "I've seen people play, but I haven't actually thrown any darts myself. I do suffer sometimes from overconfidence. It's one of my more endearing qualities, I believe."
"Endearing or not, we can't carry on like this," Kathryn said and Lee's face fell. "Don't worry. I can show you. Stand like this, with your arm and elbow like this." As Kathryn was explaining, she looked at Lee. The blonde's face was a mask of concentration and Kathryn couldn't help but smile.
"What?" Lee asked Janeway. "Am I not doing it right?"
"You look like you're about to fight a raging Klingon," Kathryn replied. "You need to relax more. Wait."
Kathryn stood in front of the taller woman and put her hands on Lee's hips. She pushed the younger woman slightly so that she was square with the dart board. Kathryn moved Lee's arm and elbow to the correct position, suddenly noticing that she was right in the younger woman's personal space. She glanced up at Lee and only saw deep blue eyes staring back at her. Kathryn felt a blush creep up her face from her neck and quickly stepped back. Lee smiled and tried to hide her own slightly reddened face.
"There," Kathryn said when she caught her breath. "Now, slowly pull your hand back, keeping your elbow steady, and then throw the dart. Remember to aim for the board."
"Very funny, Kathryn," Lee grinned. With her tongue sticking out, she squinted slightly and threw the dart. It went straight into the board, not a great throw, but definitely better. "That's great! Thanks."
"Not a problem," Kathryn said. "I don't want you using your lack of skills as an excuse later."
"Ha, I hope you're hungry, Kathryn," Lee smirked. "I'm a quick study and you'll be eating those words very soon."
The women chuckled and the game started in earnest. Kathryn quickly took the lead and insisted on lowering Lee's target. But, the Ensign wouldn't have any of it. They slowly started to unwind and started talking about more than just Voyager.
"That's not poetry," Kathryn exclaimed after Lee had recited something nonsensical. "There's no rhythm to it, it doesn't make you think or feel something. It doesn't move you."
Kathryn was up one game and the women had been discussing books. Both happy that they had passion for reading in common. Lee knew Kathryn liked more serious and thoughtful poems and had decided to share her more comical ones.
"Of course it moves you," Lee argued, lining up for her turn. "But, you have to hear the whole thing. I can only remember a small piece and it probably doesn't make much sense out of context."
"Where does it come from?"
"It's from a children's book." Lee grinned triumphantly as her dart hit the board. The points she got came a far second to actually just hitting the board.
"Is it Naomi's book?" Kathryn said and laughed at Lee shaking her head.
"It's one of my favourite authors, and yes, I read it to Naomi, but I have always hated classifications. A good story is a good story, no matter if it was written for kids or adults." Kathryn's dart hit square in the centre and she jumped another few points ahead in the game. Lee shook her head.
"If I didn't know you better, I would have said you were gloating," Lee said. "Actually, no, I think even the darts are gloating at this stage."
"Well, you didn't want adjust the points, so these are the consequences."
"A winning and gloating Janeway. I'm not sure if I can stand both. But, I can feel my luck changing." And with that Lee squarely threw her dart into the wooden beam above the fire place. She looked so surprised that Kathryn burst out laughing.
"Okay, quickly changing the subject." Lee walked over, but she couldn't reach the dart to pull it out. "You will have to hear the whole story before you can decide if it's poetry or not."
Kathryn pulled a chair over and held Lee steady as she clambered up. She could just reach the dart and with one quick pull, she and the dart stumbled off the chair. Kathryn grabbed her before Lee reached the floor.
"I think I'll do that," Kathryn replied and slowly let go of Lee. The younger woman seemed flushed, but it could just have been the heat from the fire.
"Good," Lee managed to say, wondering why she was suddenly struggling to speak. Kathryn wasn't holding her that closely. "Now, go and hit anything but the dart board, please."
Kathryn ended up beating Lee two games to nothing, but Lee had slowly been improving towards the end. The younger woman had vowed that a rematch would certainly end differently. When they finally left the holodeck, it was later than either expected and Voyager's corridors were empty. They walked in companionable silence towards the turbo lift. Lee walked Kathryn to her quarters and they stood a bit awkwardly in front of the door.
"Thank you, Kathryn," Lee said. "I needed this more than I thought."
"I'm sorry, was there something you wanted to talk about?" Kathryn asked concerned.
"No, please," Lee replied quickly. "I was going through a bit of a low. But, laughing with you helped."
"Good," Kathryn said. "I must admit, I wasn't up to doing anything social tonight either, but I really enjoyed the game. Thank you."
"It was such a pleasure. Maybe we can do it again sometime? I am planning on beating you soon. Someday. Or maybe much later, depending on how quickly I can do some secret training."
"That would be nice," Kathryn replied with a genuine smile.
"Well, then, goodnight, Kathryn." Lee gingerly stepped forward and gave Kathryn a hug. "Sweet dreams."
"You too, Lee," Kathryn said as she returned the hug. It felt nice being in the younger woman's arms. And with that, Kathryn harshly came back to reality. What am I thinking? She is a member of my crew. I am her Captain. This is not good.
As Lee stepped back, she smiled at Kathryn and the Captain's doubts were pushed to the back of her mind. Kathryn was drawn into the complete warmth and openness in the younger woman. Kathryn realised she trusted Lee, without any second thoughts. She felt a connection with her. How could that be bad?
LLLLL
B'Elanna Torres had just finished her morning discussion with her team in Engineering. Everyone had their duties for the day and were scattering to get started. Ensign Lee was finishing up some story or other with a fellow crewman. As B'Elanna walked over, Ensign Nicoletti excused herself and headed out of Engineering.
"Morning, Lieutenant Torres," the blonde woman greeted her. "I'm looking forward to getting those new parts. When will the trade agreement be finished?"
"Probably tomorrow or the day after," B'Elanna replied. "Where were you last night? Everyone missed you at the pub."
"Oh, I didn't feel like a sulking Paris," Lee replied quickly.
"What? Tom wasn't sulking."
"He would have been after I beat him at pool," Lee said with a laugh. She walked over to her console to start her daily checks and reports.
"Hold on," B'Elanna followed her. "You haven't answered my question."
"I didn't feel like a lot of people so I ended up playing darts with a friend at another pub."
"Who?" B'Elanna crossed her arms. "Did you finally give in and go on an actual date? I know there have been quite a few women and men who wanted to ask you out."
"What?" Lee shook her head. "Where are you getting this?"
"Oh, come on, Lee. For some reason, you're one of the very few people on this ship who hasn't starting seeing someone or even dated. I don't understand it really. You get along with everyone and there are some good pickings on Voyager."
"You make it sound as if I'm picking fruit," Lee said with a laugh. "I just haven't clicked with anyone and I don't want to go out with whoever asks."
"Morning, Lieutenant Torres, Ensign Lee," Seven greeted the women as she walked over to stand next to Lee.
"Thank Voyager, a change of topic," Lee said with a sigh. "How was your yesterday, Seven?"
"Don't answer that, Seven," B'Elanna interrupted. "You're going to help me get Lee to tell us who she was with on a date last night."
"Captain Janeway," Seven answered immediately. Lee and B'Elanna stared at her and then Lee burst out laughing.
"It is the Captain, isn't it?" B'Elanna said, turning back to Lee. "That's your nervous laugh."
"The Captain and Ensign Lee were the only two crew members, except those on duty, not present at the social gathering last night," Seven added.
"Firstly, I do not have a nervous laugh. Secondly, it's a bit creepy and cool that you notice those things, Seven." Lee paused. "Thirdly, I did play darts with Kath- with the Captain, but it wasn't a date."
"But, you like her!" B'Elanna argued. "You clicked or whatever with her. In a way that you haven't with anyone else. That's why you didn't want to admit it was her and that's why you've been so happy lately. Well, happier."
"I agree," Seven said. "You have been displaying a happier temperament lately. And you did say a few weeks ago that you had an interesting talk with the Captain."
"I'm going to work on something urgent and important somewhere else on Voyager. Preferably outside the ship where you two cannot get to. Maybe I can fix some hull plating." With that, Lee left her console and started towards the door.
"We're happy for you!" B'Elanna shouted after her. "Actually, that might be a good match. What do you think, Seven?"
"Relationships are more complicated than I had previously thought." Seven raised her eyebrow. "But, I agree. They do suit each other. Shall we get back to work?" B'Elanna rolled her eyes before nodding and joined Seven behind the console.
LLLLL
Captain Janeway sat staring at her screen. Her ready room was a good place to go over the day's activities and get her thoughts in order. Neither was being accomplished at the moment. The day had been without incident and Janeway couldn't focus. Or at least she couldn't focus on whatever was on her screen. She kept thinking about a certain laugh and infectious smile belonging to only one person. One person she hadn't seen in a few days. Suddenly her door chimed, and Janeway jumped slightly.
"Come in," she said, laughing at herself. "Chakotay, what can I do for you?"
"Captain," the Commander greeted her. "Actually, I wanted to find out how you were doing? You seemed a bit distracted during the trade talks."
"I'm fine, just some personal things I need to sort out," Janeway quickly replied.
"If you wanted to talk ..."
"Thank you, but no." Janeway stood up. "I think I'll figure this one out for myself. But the sentiment is appreciated. And, if there's nothing urgently needing my attention, I'll be ending my shift a bit earlier today."
"Sounds good to me," Chakotay said as he followed Captain Janeway onto the bridge. "Good luck with whatever it is." Janeway only smiled and entered the turbolift.
LLLLL
Lee had finished her duties a bit earlier and with B'Elanna being in a generous mood, she found herself in her quarters with some time to kill. She idly wondered what Kathryn was doing. Maybe I can go check the bridge, Lee mused and then laughed out loud.
"What? And make up some explanation as to why I'm checking up on the Captain? You stay right here," she admonished herself aloud. "Whatever's going on between you and Kathryn – which is probably only in your imagination – will sort itself out."
Lee stepped into her bathroom for a nice relaxing shower, hoping to get her mind off the auburn-haired woman. Naomi and Seven would be coming around later for their usual story time. She'll get ready for that and hopefully the book will get her mind off the Captain.
Lee had just gotten dressed in jeans and a t-shirt when her door chimed. Naomi's early, she thought, walking into her small living room.
"Come in," Lee said and went over to the replicator. She had saved some rations specifically for this. "Who wants chocolate ice cream?"
"Thank you, that would be lovely," Kathryn replied with a smile as Lee immediately spun around. She had two bowls in her hands and a slightly confused look on her face.
"Shouldn't we start eating before it melts?" Kathryn asked as the younger woman seemed rooted to the spot.
"I'm sorry, Kathryn," Lee said, walking over to the Captain. "I was expecting Naomi. But this is a very nice surprise. And I'm sure Naomi wouldn't mind sharing her ice cream." Lee handed Kathryn hers and they sat down on the couch together. Lee had moved her furniture to face the windows and they had a wonderful view of stars racing past.
"How was your day?" Lee asked and took a bite of the ice cream. She cringed immediately as the cold hit her. Kathryn watched in amusement as Lee shook her head slightly and took another bite.
"What?" Lee asked with a smile. "Why are you always laughing at me?"
"I'm laughing with you," Kathryn grinned. "Do you realise you make funny faces?"
"This is my face, I was born with it," Lee replied, enjoying the teasing. "And, yes, I sometimes forget to control every reaction. But, it's much easier than always trying to remember to look like this or don't show that or whatever."
"I agree. You should keep your face the way it is."
"Thanks, I plan to," Lee replied and the women shared a laugh at the absurdity of their conversation. "Now, back to the original question, did you have a good day?"
"It's starting to look up," Kathryn replied without thinking. She glanced at Lee who simply carried on eating, but was smiling between bites. The door chime sounded again and Lee put her spoon down.
"It's probably Naomi and Seven," Lee said and got up. "Actually, this is a good chance for you to see if my books are poetry or not. If you're not busy, I mean if you had plans, it's fine, we can do the book thing another night."
"No, I would love to stay," Kathryn replied and got a huge grin in return.
"Great!" Lee walked to the door. "Come in."
Naomi Wildman, the young daughter of Samantha Wildman, burst through the entrance and hugged Lee. Seven of Nine simply nodded at Lee and followed at a more sedate pace.
"What took you so long to let us in?" Naomi asked. "We have to read the whole book tonight. You promised, remember?"
"Yes, and we will," Lee said. Both Naomi and Seven paused when they noticed the Captain. "Would it be all right if Captain Janeway joined us? She doesn't believe how awesome the book is."
"What?" Naomi's eyes couldn't be wider. "Captain, it's one of the best books ever! Lee even used some of her replicator rations to get a real one. Now we don't have to read it from a padd."
"Good evening, Captain," Seven greeted Janeway and sat down on the one chair. "I must agree with Naomi that the book is quite fascinating. Some of the words are very peculiar, but Ensign Lee has assured me that they are part of the author's artistic licence."
"We've had some ice cream already," Lee said. "Does anyone want any or maybe something to drink before we start reading?"
Naomi was too eager to get started on the book. When Seven and Kathryn also declined, Lee took her seat next to Kathryn. Naomi ran into Lee's bedroom and came back with a thin, but very colourful children's book. The young girl paused in front of Lee and then promptly squeezed herself between the Ensign and the armrest.
"You could sit in the middle, if you like," Kathryn said. She was very aware of Lee's body so close against her own.
"That wouldn't work," Naomi replied. "Lee's reading and you have to see the pictures. Seven already knows it so it doesn't matter."
"We have read this particular book six times," Seven remarked.
"If you wanted to go and do something else, I wouldn't mind, Seven," Lee said, shifting slightly to get comfortable. Sitting this close to Kathryn was causing a hurricane of butterflies in her stomach. Get a grip, Lee, she thought, we're only reading a book.
"No, each time has been different and I think this will be as well. I find it interesting how you and Naomi can enjoy the book even though you've heard it before."
"Once funny, always funny," Lee said and Kathryn smiled. "You all right, Kathryn? You have enough space?"
"I'm fine," the Captain replied. I just need to stop my heart beating so wildly, Kathryn thought. She could smell Lee's perfume and Kathryn wondered what it would be like to just lean her head against the younger woman's shoulder. Mentally shaking herself, she said, "Please, start reading. I'm very curious to see what all the fuss is about."
"Good." Lee took an exaggerated breath which made Naomi giggle. "Oh, The Places You'll Go by Dr Seuss. For those new to his work, Dr Seuss is a nineteenth century Earth writer who wrote many children's books. Each had his signature style and illustrations."
"Boring! Start reading the book, please," Naomi pleaded and opened the book in Lee's hands to the first page. The women on the couch laughed and Seven smiled.
"All right, all right," Lee said and started reading. "Congratulations! Today is your day. You're off to Great Places! You're off and away!"
Kathryn was immediately captured by Lee's voice. The Ensign lived the book, voicing every emotion and laughing at herself and the book at the right places. Lee would look up and grab Naomi's attention and did the same with Kathryn and Seven. When she would glance at Kathryn, the Captain would lose the plot slightly and only see the blue of Lee's eyes.
The book was about going where you want to and handling bad situations as they come along. Never giving up on your journey. Kathryn thought it was very apt for Voyager's current predicament and said so once Lee had finished reading it.
"That's one of the reasons I love it so much," Lee replied. "And, does it qualify as poetry or not? What was it you said? O, right. Does it move you? Make you feel something?"
"I have to say that the when you quoted a piece the other night, I wasn't convinced." Kathryn paused. "But, you've changed my mind. It's a wonderful book."
"I told you, Captain," Naomi chipped in. "Please, Lee, can't we read one more? Please!"
"No, Naomi," Lee replied and interrupted the girl before she could make another plea. "Your mom will be here any minute and we can always do this again another night."
"What do you think, Seven?" Kathryn asked. She realised she was practically lying on Lee's shoulder. Slowly, she shifted away from her and spared Lee a glance. Lee immediately missed Kathryn's presence and frowned.
"I like the message," the ex-Borg said, not missing the body language between her friends. "And, I find it amusing. Thank you, Ensign Lee. You read it very well."
"Thanks, Seven," Lee replied as the door chimed. She turned to Naomi. "That'll be your mom. Come in!" Lee got up with Naomi as Samantha came in. She greeted the women and only paused a second when she noticed the Captain.
"How was it? Did you read the same one again?" Sam asked her daughter, giving her a hug.
"It was great! We even had the Captain liking the book," Naomi grinned.
"That's nice," Sam replied and turned to Lee and Seven. "Thanks again for this. I really appreciate the time you spend with Naomi."
"It's our pleasure," Lee replied.
"Where else would Ensign Lee be able to read her children's books?" Seven added getting a laugh from everyone. Sam and Naomi said a final goodbye and left.
"Would you like something to drink? Coffee?" Lee asked her friends, hoping to spend some more time with Kathryn.
"Thank you, but I think I should be getting to my quarters," Kathryn replied.
"I should also be getting my required regeneration," Seven said. "Thank you for a nice evening." Lee hugged Kathryn goodbye and had to remind herself not to hold on too long. Seven also got a hug and didn't frown as much as before.
"Thanks for coming," Lee said as the women walked out her door.
"It was very nice," Kathryn said. "Sleep well." Seven gave a final nod as the door closed behind her and Kathryn. The women headed for the nearest turbolift.
"Captain, you should spend more time with Ensign Lee," Seven said. Captain Janeway had been lost in thought and it took her a few seconds to process what her companion had said.
"What? What do you mean, Seven?" Janeway tried to keep her voice calm. Seven had noticed. Kathryn had been inappropriate in her exchanges with Lee and Seven had seen it.
"You both seem to be happier and more relaxed in each other's company. It would be logical to spend more time with the person who makes you happy."
"It's not that simple, Seven."
"I disagree. Are you concerned about Starfleet protocols?"
"Seven, I am not having this conversation with you," Janeway replied, getting defensive and a bit angry. "Nothing is happening between us. And, yes, I strongly believe in Starfleet protocols. They are there for everyone's safety. The Captain must make objective decisions regarding the crew and ship. Not base them on personal feelings about a specific person."
"You are rationalising," Seven replied and Kathryn bit off an angry retort. "Neither you nor Ensign Lee would ever put the other in that kind of position. And neither of you would expect that from the other person."
"This is all hypothetical," Kathryn said angrily. "And we're done talking about this."
"I am not." Seven stopped walking and they stood in the corridor. Kathryn had her hands on her hips and Seven knew she only had a few sentences before the Captain exploded. "If you're happy, you make sound decisions which will keep Voyager and its crew alive. And, you're happy with Ensign Lee. A happy Captain is a happy ship."
Kathryn couldn't believe what she was hearing, but Seven's last comment floored her. She burst out laughing.
"You've been spending too much time with Lee and her books," Kathryn said with a smile. "You're starting to sound like her."
"I do not think that's a bad thing," Seven replied and carried on to the turbolift. Kathryn just shook her head and followed the ex-Borg.