a/n: here you are, an actual update from me to you! (If any of the people who were reading this to begin with didn't give up, lol) Had a sudden outburst of thoughts for this story, and ideas for later on…unfortunately, however, I have not one, but TWO AP tests tomorrow. And of course, when you have doom impending on you rapidly, what do you do but write fanfiction!

The next few days for Gilderoy passed with peaceful, dreamless nights following them. Every night, Healer Loell or Healer Brodyn would give him the potion, and every night he would take it.

Every morning after breakfast, Gilderoy would learn joined up writing with Healer Elleyne, a slightly plump, pleasant young medi-witch. He could remember his first lesson, and how he hadn't wanted to take it, protesting quite avidly that he would rather sit in the chair beside his bed, playing with a bunch of paper clips that some Healer had absentmindedly left lying around. He got a fascination out of hooking the silver, shining metal together at different angles to make designs, and even little people. Creating things like this delighted him.

Quite apart from this, learning joined up writing had no creativity to it whatsoever. Gilderoy had tried putting random letters together, but he knew that it wasn't excepted, they didn't make words. Didn't make sense.

Sort of like the thoughts he had been having of late. Thoughts of ink and paper floating across his mind, thoughts of color instead of black and white.

One particular day, a week or so after his terrible dream that he still could not erase, Gilderoy was busy looking at himself in the little mirror on the wall near the writing desk he used to share with Hayden (until Hayden died unexpectedly the year before, that was).

Gilderoy liked to look at himself in the mirror. He liked especially to smile at the mirror and see himself smiling back. Gilderoy thought his smile was just about the best thing about him, and he had grown awfully fond of it. He wondered if he was fond of it before the Accident sometimes, but most of the time he just never thought about the time before the Accident. In truth, it didn't seem to him like there ever was a time before the Accident, and as a result he kept forgetting his true age.

While he was playing his games with the mirror, Gilderoy noticed someone else coming into the picture that up until now had been a self-portrait of a goofily grinning young man with wavy blond hair, blue eyes and very white teeth. The hand on his shoulder came unexpectedly, causing Gilderoy to jump a bit, before turning around sheepishly to face the Healer.

"Didn't you hear me calling you, Gilderoy?" she asked kindly, but with an edge of impatience to her tone.

Gilderoy hung his head.

"No," he said simply and truthfully. Out of the corner of his eye, he saw his twin in the mirror going through the same motions, moving his mouth in the same way.

"You haven't been having bad dreams, again?" she asked sternly. "You did agree you would tell us if that kind of thing happened again."

"No, I haven't," Gilderoy declared, shifting position and crossing his arms loosely. "If I had, you would know. I would've informed you."

Healer Elleyne let out an unexpected, small burst of laughter. The expression on her face was one of amusement.

"What?" Gilderoy asked, going a bit pink in the face. He was more curious than embarrassed really, and turned from side to side, looking for the source of her amusement.

"It's just you," she explained "You can't help looking at yourself in the mirror when you talk. You do it all the time."

"Really?" He couldn't think what else to say.

"Yes. It's not unusual, really. I had a sister who would do it all the time."

"Had a sister?"

"Well, come on," Healer Elleyne said, turning around so quickly it made Gilderoy feel dizzy. "It's time for your lesson. You do want to learn to write before Christmas, don't you?"

A bit confused, Gilderoy followed her to a cabinet which she unlocked to retrieve some nice thick parchment paper and some quills, which she then brought back to the small wooden desk under the mirror.

The lesson continued rather uneventfully, until Gilderoy lost interest and began to drag his quill over the parchment, making things other than letters. He was in the process of making a blob that looked something like an egg patty when Healer Elleyne patiently told him he would have to stop doodling, and would he like to learn his name?

Honestly, Gilderoy couldn't see the point, so he stifled a fake yawn.

"I'm tired again," he said.

"You've had breakfast a couple of hours ago," Healer Elleyne told him, not believing him. All the same, she decided it wouldn't hurt to end for the day. They had been going for over an hour, and she couldn't expect her charge's attention span to be too great. It was like dealing with a child, almost…and in other ways, not at all.

"Go back to bed and get some more rest, if that's what you're after."

Elleyne watched Gilderoy walk back to his bed and sit on the end for a while, sort of staring into space. When next she looked, he was fast asleep. She supposed he must have really been tired.

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"Hey! Nancy boy! Get over here!"

The small first year boy with the wavy blond hair turned around to see them marching across the grounds towards him. He clutched his books closer to his chest. He should have known he couldn't escape them. At least it was only Wilkes and Rosier.

"What did we tell you boy?" screamed Evan Rosier, his tone blazing with anticipation and his round, stupid face shining with glee. Jacob Wilkes cackled evilly.

The blond haired boy started walking faster towards the lake, but Wilkes and Rosier were quicker. Soon they had him cornered with his back to the lake, which made him undeniably uncomfortable. Why couldn't they just leave him alone? What did they want from him?

"You got any money in your pockets?" Rosier spat out suddenly, as if on a whim. Wilkes, who was wiser in the ways of bullying the helpless, snorted.

The boy started to edge around the lake, but Rosier stepped out and grabbed his arm. "You're not going anywhere," he growled. A nasty grin formed on Wilkes's face as he took the boy's other arm.

"Do you know where we are?" he whispered into the boy's ear. The boy's eyes widened and he began to struggle. Panicked thoughts flashed through his mind.

They're going to throw me into the lake. The squid, what'll I do! The squid eats people alive, that's what that sixth year said.

Then,

Don't be stupid, the sixth year wasn't telling the truth…

The fear and frustration built up in the struggling boy and just before he felt his feet being forcefully lifted from the ground, he screamed, "Let me go!"

Gilderoy just had time to open his mouth and call for help before the shocking cold of the water enveloped him. It was a chilly autumn day, and the water felt like it was below freezing. Darkness impeded on his vision in the murky water as he stroked upwards without thinking. Closer, closer to the surface…he was getting closer…

Everything went black.

When next he woke he found himself on a clean white bed, the covers tucked neatly around him.

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"Elleyne?" Gilderoy exclaimed, sitting up so quickly he felt a sickish thrill. The clean white covers fell back around him, and he sat there in a state of disarray, staring in a state of alarm at the young Healer.

"Well, that's the first time you've called me by only my first name," Elleyne muttered, not entirely disapproving. "Something must really be wrong. Are you all right?"

"What?" Gilderoy asked stupidly.

"Are you okay? Just in case you didn't know, that is not a normal way to wake up." Her face grew suddenly serious. "You didn't have another dream, did you?"

Gilderoy appeared to be staring into space. When Elleyne followed his gaze, she saw he was looking in the little mirror across the room. His own face looked back at him from afar, confused and a little bit scared.

"Yes, I think I did," Gilderoy said softly. His voice had a pleasant but serious undertone to it. "If you could call it that."