Curse of the Cruise Ship

Chapter Four

Tortuga

ESF's Author's Note: I drank some of my dad's rum and cherry coke the other day, and I must say it was just about the worst thing I've ever had. Second only to beer. I have yet to try plain rum. There is a great chance I won't like it, since I don't like alcohol much. Oh well. Read wendystwin's A/N! She's so silly.

Okay, I have question for all you people. Am I the only one who thinks Jack shouldn't be brought back from the dead? And no, I'm not a Jack-hater. In fact, Jack is my favorite character. But bringing him back just doesn't seem right.

Fiyero-Fae 4ever: The girls have few lines because they're shy. That's right. Shy. Also, they don't want to mess with the course of the movie or history. Not only are they in the movie, but they also went back in time. This isn't a parallel universe thing. History is what's slightly AU, since Jack Sparrow didn't really exist. It's rather complicated, but don't worry, everything will be uncomplicated later. I won't tell you when, though. Don't want to ruin the story. But you can guess all you want!

wendystwin's Author's Note: I would like to accept this award for best Pirates fan fiction on the behalf of that I couldn't do it without Eternal Silver Flame and her ability to be good with words! Now I would also like to talk about ducks. Ducks are cool because they quack. But you know what's even better than a duck? Well do ya? Ok, ok, don't get your undies in a bunch its a llama! Oh yeah, the best creature on the face of the earth, and in the solar system, and in the entire galaxy! Including Pluto, which we lost recently. Poor Pluto! Oh well. On that note, read and you shall be happy! Good night, y'all!

Night had fallen by the time they reached Tortuga. Before they went ashore, Jack brought Melody and Wendy each a flintlock pistol and two leather pouches, which he'd found below deck.

"What are these for?" asked Melody.

Jack stared at her for a few seconds. "They're called guns," he explained. "They're for shooting things, sometimes to kill."

"We know that," said Wendy, rolling her eyes. "She means, why do we need them?"

"Well, Tortuga is a rather dodgy place for two young ladies such as yourselves. It wouldn't be wise for you to walk the streets without any sort of weapon. Savvy?"

The girls shared a rather perplexed look. Tortuga couldn't be that bad, could it? After a quick lesson on how to reload the black powder and bullets (the contents of the pouches) and a warning not to get it wet or it won't fire, the girls attached the pouches and the guns to their belts and followed Jack into Tortuga.

As it turned out, Tortuga was very different than it was in the movie. For the most part, it was the same; people ran up and down the streets and everyone was rather drunk. But to add to this, there were various couples making out in plain sight, and the sort of things those couples were doing were not something that anyone would dare to put in a Disney movie.

"More importantly," Jack was saying, "it is indeed a sad life that has never breathed deep this sweet, proliferous bouquet that is Tortuga, savvy?" He grabbed a passing guy's walking sick. "What do you think?"

Will focused on a man sitting on the ground, pouring one beer after another into his mouth. "It'll linger."

"Ladies?"

"I agree with Will," said the girls in unison. Jack and Will stared at them in surprise.

"We've done that a couple times," said Wendy.

"We decided we might be twins," said Melody.

"Yes, well," said Jack. "You see, if every town in the world were like this one, no man would ever feel unwanted." Jack spotted a woman walking toward him. "Scarlett!" he exclaimed, and hurried to meet her. Without hesitating, she bitch-slapped him and stalked off. "Not sure I deserved that." He turned around in time to see another woman approach him. "Giselle!"

"'Oo was she?" she asked, nodding after Scarlett.

"What?" He got another slap. "I may have deserved that."

They continued through the town. "We should escape this wretched pit as quickly as possible," said Jack.

"With a crew?" said Will.

"Ah, yes. Well it just so happens that you know a man who knows the man who knows the finest sailors in all Tortuga." He tossed the walking stick to Will, who gave it to a nearby man, who used it to knock out another man.

They found Mr. Gibbs sleeping in a pig pen outside a bar. Jack woke him by throwing a bucket of water on him.

"Curse ya for breathing, ya slack-jawed idiot!" yelled Gibbs, waving a dagger about. When he realized who he was looking at, he said, "Mother's love! Jack! You should know better'n to wake a man when he's sleeping. It's bad luck."

"Ah," said Jack, "fortunately, I know how to counter it. The man who did the waking buys the sleeping man a drink. The man who was sleeping drinks it while listening to a proposition from the man who did the waking."

Gibbs stared at Jack as if trying to figure out what the heck he just said. "Aye," he said finally, "that'll about do it." Jack gave him a hand up, and Will immediately threw another bucket of water on Gibbs. Gibbs shook the water out of his eyes. "Blast, I'm already awake!" he shouted.

"That was for the smell," Will explained. The girls giggled. After a moment, Gibbs nodded understandingly.

They went to a small but rowdy tavern called The Faithful Bride, where Jack bought himself and Gibbs drinks. Will and the girls were to wait a few feet away.

"Keep a sharp eye," advised Jack, and took the drinks to the table where Gibbs was sitting.

"Been doing that since we walked in," said Melody quietly to Will. He looked awfully nervous, and only nodded. Wendy's hand hadn't moved from where her pistol was attached to her waist.

"So, Will," said Wendy, trying to take all their minds off their surroundings, "this girl you're looking for, what's her name again?"

"Elizabeth Swann."

"Oh, that's a lovely name," said Melody, suddenly feeling like teasing the poor guy.

Will smiled slightly. "Yes, it is, isn't it?"

"Is she you're significant other?" asked Wendy, unsure if the term 'girlfriend' had been invented yet.

Will's face flushed slightly. "Oh, no, Miss, it's nothing like that!"

The girls shared identical grins. "But you must care for her a great deal," said Melody, "to go to these lengths to get her back. Teaming up with a pirate, I mean."

"It's so romantic!" Wendy cooed.

Melody giggled. "I know!"

"You do care for her, don't you, Will?"

Will didn't say anything for a moment. "Yes. Yes I do."

"Mr. Turner," said Jack's voice from behind Will, who jumped a bit. "Escort these ladies back to the ship and get some rest. Mr. Gibbs here will be gathering a crew for us."

"And you?" asked Will.

"The Interceptor's supplies seem to be...lacking in a few areas, and I need to tend to that."

"Meaning there's no rum?" asked Wendy.

Jack smirked. "Aye, among other things."

Melody, Wendy, and Will decided that they didn't want to know what Jack meant by 'other things' and they headed back to the Interceptor.