Life, The Pranks, And Egotism

Today's quote brought to you by the author Douglas Adams, his character Zaphod Beebelbrox. Go forth and read The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy and become a frood who really knows where your towel is. And always remember: Tuesdays are truly the worst day of the week, 42 is the meaning of life, life is like a grapefruit, no major problems can be solved with just potatoes, and time is an illusion.

'If there is anything in the universe more important than my ego, I want it taken out and shot immediately.'

Treize stared aghast at the T-shirt in his hands, jaw hanging open, eyes wide with appalled fascination.

Une was sitting on the floor, leaning against the wall, snickering. She had been standing up, but once she'd started laughing, she'd started shaking so hard from her laughter that she was unable to remain on her feet and had slid down the wall.

Finally shaking off his shocked daze, Treize took out his letter opener – really an ornate antique jeweled dagger that he had just decided to get some use out of instead of letting it laughing in a weapons display – and started fastidiously cutting the T-shirt into strips into long cotton strips.

Une's laughter finally petered out and she pushed herself to her feet and came over to watch her husband shred the shirt. "Too bad," she remarked, letting a titter escape before she quashed it. "I would have loved the see the look on Maxwell's face when he saw you wearing that."

Treize grunted. "Chang was the one who sent this to me," he replied, scowling as the dagger met resistance when he tried to cut through the collar. All the mail he'd opened with it had dulled the sharp edge.

Une blinked. "Oh, my," she said, knowing that if the most honorable Chang Wufei had thrown himself so whole-heartedly into this game as to greatly insult someone he was respected…

All bets were off.

"Exactly," Treize replied, familiar enough with her thought processes from years of exposure to guess where they'd led her. "And what's worse – Zechs pulled Dorothy in."

Une managed to hold back a whimper only by sheer force of will. She herself had often been called the 'Bitch of OZ' when her manic 'Colonel' side had taken over, but Dorothy Catalonia was, and would always remain, one of the scariest women she'd ever met.

Catalonia was a bitch all the time. And she was completely unpredictable.

"And Miss Catalonia does not seem to be observing the unwritten, implicit rule of this game that you only hit one person at a time," Treize added, continuing in his clothing decimation.

That did it. Sheer force of will was no match for stark-raving terror. If Catalonia wasn't abiding by one rule, then it was as good as said that she wouldn't abide by any of them.

"I've already swept for bugs and doubled the security," Treize told her, taking his eyes off his handiwork long enough to send her a reassuring glance. "But would you mind terribly checking to make sure she hasn't sent us a computer virus?"

Une whimpered.