This isn't my fault. Jiraya kidnapped my muse, I swear!

"Okay!" said the counselor, her cheerfulness magically back in full. "You have to make up and perform your own skits with those costumes! Yay! It's two teams, boys against girls! And guess what! The winner gets an extra special prize! The losing team will have to wait on them all day tomorrow!"

"You can't be serious! Number one rookies don't wait on anyone!" snapped Neji.

"Yeah, this is an outrage!" yelled Shino. "Even though this costume does make me feel pretty..."

"Plays are so troublesome." muttered Shikamaru.

"You know, if we win, we can make the girls keep their costumes on all day tomorrow as well." mused Sasuke. Neji considered that for a moment, then grinned.

"Well, I suppose this isn't that bad."

"Gotta roll with the punches."

"A ninja never says no to any assignment."

"Teach us to work together, builds creativity, that sort of thing."

"And of course we're gonna win."

"Of course."

Meanwhile, the girls were off in a group of their own, consulting with each other.

"Did you hear what they said? There is no way I'm going to wear this all day tomorrow." said Sakura.

"Absolutely. We can't let the boys win." said Mika.

"Which means we are going to have to be so much better than them that there's no question of who wins." said Ino firmly.

"Exactly. But first, we need to know how it's going to be judged." said Temari.

"Oh, I can tell you that!" said the counselor cheerfully. From right behind them. Everyone jumped a foot in the air. "Listen up everyone! The winners will be the people whose play gets the most of a reaction from the audience! Anyone who interferes with the other's play will automatically lose. Now, you've got five minutes to plan!" The girl looked at each other and grinned, then started to whisper to each other. The boys however were too busy imagining the costumed girls bringing them drinks, fanning them, and bending over to pick things up. Pervs. "Okay, planning time is up! Boys get on the stage!" she said, shoving the confused boys onto the stage.

"What do we do?" asked Naruto.

"Uh, we'll play it by ear!" said Neji. "Shikamaru, you narrate!"

"Why do I have to narrate? That's so troublesome."

"Because you're dressed as a pineapple! Pineapples can't do anything! Now get out there! And everyone remember, we can't lose, so get as much of a reaction as possible!" Shikamaru walked over to the front of the stage.

"Ugh, is this troublesome thing on?" he said tapping the microphone. "Alright then. There once was a troublesome fox named Naruto." Naruto skipped onto the stage.

"Look at me! I'm a cute little fox! Believe it! La la la la, oh look a flower!" Hinata giggled.

"No Hinata! Shield your eyes from the treacherous cuteness!" cried Mika.

"And he had a friend, a troublesome dog named Kiba." Kiba came on stage a little less enthusiastically than Naruto.

"Woof. Woof. Woof." he said.

"And they liked to frolic in the meadows together and other such troublesome things. Though I don't know why, it's so much less troublesome to just lie down and watch the clouds. But then again, we all know"

"Get on with it!" snapped Sasuke.

"Fine, fine. So anyway, they liked the meadow. It was filled with flowers and butterflies and birds, troublesome chirping things, always keeping you from getting a decent nap." Shino ran across the stage flapping his arms yelling "I'm a pretty butterfly!"

"So one day they were out frolicking when their (troublesome) friend Lee the squirrel hamster thing came along." Lee twirled onto stage.

"Oh Gai sensei, behold as I do my best in this youthful play!Hello my youthful friends, what youthful antics are you up to today! Let us go train our fluffy ninja powers so that we may become strong and win the heart of a certain beautiful pink haired creature! Oh Sakura, lovely and fair, I shall compose a sonnet to you! Oh fair the morn upon which thy eyes shine, more lovely than the moon..."

"But at that moment, they were attacked by a wild banana," said Shikamaru "and the squirrel was not able to compose any more bad poetry on account of being ravaged."

"Banana!" yelled Kankuro leaping out of the undergrowth to maul Lee.

"Should we rescue him?" asked Kiba.

"Nah, let's go play with our teddy bear!" said Naruto, jumping on Gaara. "Heh heh, always wanted to do that."

"No! Get off me! Help! Oh, this is worse than being attacked by dolphins!" yelled Gaara.

"Never fear! I Sasuke, angsty sexy mysterious genuis ninja of Konaha will save you!!" yelled Sasuke jumping out and trying to look heroic, which is hard to do as a bright yellow teletubby. Naruto stared.

"Seriously, that's not gonna help Sasuke. Hey, you have an antenna!"

"Yeah, so?" asked Sasuke. Naruto grabbed it and let go, watching it sproing all over the place. "Hey, quit that!"

"Wow! That's the coolest thing ever! You try Kiba!" said Naruto. Kiba tried it.

"Dude, that's so much fun!"

"I know, I could do this all day."

"Aww come on! Stop it! I'm too cool and emo to get my antenna sproinged!" said Sasuke, being ignored. Shikamaru leaned close to the audience.

"But meanwhile, while they were distracted, an evil snake came and stole their teddy!" Gaara looked around.

"Umm, what snake?"

"That troublesome snake! Where is he? Shino, go get Kabuto!" Shino walked off stage and returned dragging Kabuto.

"Well, it's not my fault, this costume doesn't have leg holes, it's impossible to move!"

"Speaking of which, you're standing up. Snakes don't stand." said Sasuke shoving him over.

"Hey! Don't shove Kabuto! Mika yelled at him.

"Hey! Don't yell at Sasuke!" Sakura yelled at her.

"Hey! Sit down and shut up both of you! That counts as a reaction! Do you want to have to wear these all day tomorrow as well?" yelled Tenten. Whereupon the two sat down and shut up.

"Anyway as I was saying, the evil snake," said Shikamaru

"Hiss. Hiss. Oh so very evil." muttered Kabuto unenthusiastically

"Stole their beloved teddy bear! And then ran away to his impenetrable fortress." said Shikamaru dropping a cardboard box over Kabuto and Gaara.

"Oh come on! I can't see! Why would a snake have an impenetrable fortress anyway, and what would he want with a teddy bear?" asked Kabuto. Shikamaru ignored him.

"Oh no! Our favorite teddy has been taken away to this fortress! And yea, it is so terribly impenetrable!" said Naruto.

"But just when all hope seemed lost,"

"Alas! Truly all hope is lost!" bemoaned Kiba.

"They spied something glittering over the horizon!"

"Lo! Is that something glittering I spy over the horizon?" asked Kiba

"It was the good fairy princess Neji come to save them!" Neji jumped onto stage.

"Allright! I'm here to save you with sparkly fairy princess magic!"

"Wow, there wasn't a manly word in that sentence." mused Naruto. "But you know, you don't really look that great."

"Bah! I'll have you know I'm a genius number one rookie fairy! I graduated top of my classes at the magical fairy academy!"

"And the streak continues!" said Naruto. "So you can help us save our teddy bear?"

"Yes! With my super genius number one magic skills! Behold!" he waved his wand and there appeared in a puff of smoke...Choji."

"Aww man, this is a furby, not our teddy!" complained Kiba. Naruto poked it.

"Hey, is this your so called number one? Huh, it's not very good!"

"Well, okay, I'll come up with another plan. So we get some grappling hooks right? And then we scale the castle walls, fight off some guards and steal their armor so we can sneak in, then hide in the throne room right? So then when he comes in we grab the swords off the walls and engage in a flashy and overly dramatic sword fight!" said Neji. "Then we can get some pudding and a giant tin squid, and,"

"Gah! I've had enough of this!" yelled Kabuto. He kicked over the cardboard box, and shoved Gaara over. "There! You've saved your teddy! You're done! The play is over!" he attempted to storm off the stage, but due to aforementioned lack of leg holds in the costume, just tripped and fell over.

"So, uh, did we win?" asked Naruto.

"I guess so." said Kiba. "Wrap it up Shikamaru!"

"And so they saved their teddy and were all happy and partied all night with non alcoholic soda type beverages. No, you guys don't need to act that part out, it,s, oh for the love of god did Naruto just drink an entire liter of soda in one gulp? How much did you give him? Do I see six empty bottled there? Take cover! This is going to be troublesome!" Naruto became an orange streak bouncing from wall to wall.

"Wehehee caffeine is my friend it's gonna help me become hokage someday and i'll be the best hokage ever believe it and all the sea anemones will bow down to me and proclaim me their leader woo look at the pretty colors hee hee froth froth i'm totally super fox hokage hey are those tentacles bweeheehee!" They eventually pried the twitching Naruto off the ceiling and leaned him in a corner, babbling about "squishy sea thingies, all will obey me!"

"Okay, time for the girls play, umm, just as soon as we clean up this wreckage!" said the counselor.

Hmm, it looks like this is gonna take a while, so while they clean up let's go see what our favorite hermit is up to!

"Okay, so this radio station is supposed to have good music. I just turn this dial, and wait."

"We at K 47.6 are dedicated to bringing you the best music ever. So, we bring you, the Flaming Schnitzels, with their polka punk rock !"

"Guten tag! I wear my lederhosen and my mohawk high, and I eat my bratwurst hot! Schnitzel schnitzel schnitzel schnitzel rocking the world! Oh yeah, I'm bringing bratwurst back! Thank you Germany!"

"Why oh why does fate hate me?"

Okay, that should have been enough time, back to the girls! They were all on the stage. They paused for a moment to whisper something with each other. Naruto noticed Hinata was blushing.

"Hey Hinata! Don't be embarrassed! Do your best!" he yelled.

"Shut up idiot! Do you want them to win?" said Sasuke.

"Make me! Hinata's just too cute!" he yelled.

"Naruto kun is so supportive." Hinata smiled

"Yeah Hinata!Keep being adorable and we'll win for sure!" cheered Mika.

"Oh no you won't!" yelled Sasuke.

"Yes we will! You're helping us win right now!" snapped Sakura.

"No I'm not! Wait, I am! Crap! I gotta stop! I gotta stop yelling about how I should stop! I gotta"

"Just sit down and shut up you troublesome idiot!" snapped Shikamaru shoving Sasuke into his seat.

"Hey boys? Just telling you, but you're one reaction away from the girls winning." said the counselor. The boys' eyes widened. Sasuke started to say something before Neji Shikamaru and Gaara slapped a hand over his mouth.

"Shut up for the rest of the play or I'm duct taping your mouth shut!" hissed Neji in his ear. Apparently the girls heard it, because they exchanged glances.

"Phase two?"

"Phase two."

"My, it's very hot today isn't it Mika?" asked Sakura.

"Yes, terribly so. It's soo very hot in here, don't you think Tenten?"

"Why yes, yes it is. But you know what would help?"

"Oh, please tell me!" said Sakura jumping up and down.

"A cool, refreshing, smooth, delicious milkshake!" said Tenten happily passing the cups around.

"Hey, where did those come from?" wondered the counselor. Everyone ignored her.

"Oh, these are soooo good!" purred Sakura. "If only a certain person were up here we could share it."

"Yes, they're so sweet and creamy. What flavor is yours Hinata?" asked Tenten.

"I,it's strawberry?" said Hinata shyly.

"That's lovely." said Mika supportively patting Hinata on the back. "But you know what? I'm still very hot."

"Yes, me too." said Ino. "Oh, however shall we solve this dilemma?"

"Why, I can solve it." said Temari, pulling a lever on the stage. It opened up to, reveal a pool underneath which all the girls tumbled into.

"Oh dear! I'm soaking wet!" bemoaned Ino.

"Yes, and now I'm cold too! Look, I'm shivering!" said Mika.

"Yes! Oh, if only there were some people around here to cuddle with and help keep us warm!" said Sakura. It was about that time that, while the counselor was still trying to figure out where the pool had come from(uber ninja skills) the boys charge the stage. The counselor stared.

"Oh...my...That's definitely interfering! The girls win. And...Hey you! Put that back on! Yes you! Oh, you'd better stop that, do you know how much trouble you'll be in if your sensei sees you doing that! Grrr...EVERYONE GET DOWN HERE RIGHT NOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" Everyone came down in shock and terror. "Right then." she said sweetly. "The boys interfered with their play, so the girls won! Starting tomorrow, you boy, who were very ill behaved might I add" one of them snickered quietly. "you boys will have to do everything the girls tell you!" The girls grinned at each other, and the boys groaned.

"I can't believe this." moaned Kabuto.

"Aww come on! It will be fun! For me at least!" said Mika sneaking up from behind to put her arms around him.

"Number one rookies don't listen to anyone!" complained Sasuke.

"Well, you do tomorrow." said Sakura to him with a grin.

"This is so troublesome." muttered Shikamaru.

"Deal with it!" snapped Ino.

"Yeah! I get to spend all day tomorrow with Hinata! Believe it!" yelled Naruto, appearing to be the only happy one.

"Baka! You won't be having fun!" snapped Neji.

"We'll see." said the girls. "We plan to have fun."

Dun dun dun! The exciting conclusion to chapter seven!

Okay peoples, here's the deal. I've been kind of lax in updating, and making you wait a long unspecified time between updates. So, I'm going to try to update at least every weekend. And as you all know, your reviews inspire me to write even more. So you guys know what to do right? Review, tell your friends about this fic? Please?" Pretty please? With a cherry on top? Also, suggestions for stuff to do in the future are always welcome. Oh, and to the person who asked why I have a hermit in my fic: The hermit is a cameo of a friend of mine who contributes a lot of great ideas. If you know me in real life, you might be able to guess who! Besides, there's a hermit of frogs right? Why not a hermit of camp? Hermits rule. And that was all she wrote.