Okay, I'm sorry if this chapter has a little too much ItaxOC in it, but I just couldn't help myself! Anyways, hope you like this chapter!
I DO NOT OWN ANY OF THE ANIME/MANGA/OTHER MENTIONED HEREIN! I DO NOT OWN REESE'S PUFFS CEREAL! I ONLY OWN MY OWN CHARACTERS!
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"Well, are we gonna do this or what?" Itachi said, licking mashed potatoes off his fingers.
"Yeah, hang on, everyone else is still getting ready for the beach.", Azuki said, wearing a two-piece white bikini with strawberries on it. She shoved stuff into a duffel bag full of food and random beach stuff. "Fried chicken...watermelon...weasel...wait...weasel!" She drew her hand back out of the bag as a sharp pain stabbed into her hand. Three brown-and-white weasels were latched onto her fingers. "ARGH DAMN WEASELS GET OFFA MY FINGER!" she screamed, swinging her hand around trying to sling the rodents off.
Itachi looked at her like 'What kind of 'weasel' are you talking about?' and then asked, dodging an airborne weasel, " wait...Beach? I thought we were having a pool party?" He ducked as another weasel flew past his head.
"Yeah, we were, but there are too many people to fit into our pool, or any other pool for that matter. Speaking of which, why aren't you dressed for the beach?" she asked as she looked over the body of the akatsuki-clothed young man.
"Uchiha Itachi does not swim." He said with a 'So THERE!' attitude. Big mistake; he turned around to find Azuki staring at him with big puppy eyes. "B..but Itachi..its not a beach party if you don't swim! And besides...I..", she blushed. "I'd really like to see you in your swim trunks..."
FISH
-blank stare-
Anyways...
Itachi sighed as he licked the last of the potatoes off his hands. "Fine...I'll be right back..." He said, walking towards his room. He swung open the door and gazed upon its...messiness. Yes, the prodigial Uchiha was actually a huge pig when it came to keeping order in his room. He sifted through the clothes in the wardrobe and finally settled on a pair of black swim trunks. With little red clouds on them. Squee! Akatsuki swim trunks! "I think these are Azuki's favourite...", he muttered to himself as he unbuttoned his long coat.
-meanwhile-
More people began to loiter around the hallway, wondering how exactly they were all gonna get to the beach.
"HIIII EVERYONE!", a hyper blond person wearing a frilly yellow bathing suit with shorts came bounding down the hall. "MOMIJII-KUN!" everyone glomped Momiji in all his frilly glory. "Crossdressers get all the girls...", Gojyo thought as he began to seriously consider putting on a dress.
"Thats just wrong...", muttered a carrot-topped boy with a pissed-off expression on his face. "A boy wearing a girls bathing suit...and its frilly..."
"So? Whats wrong with crossdressing?", Deidara asked, wearing a black-and-red two piece bikini with a multicoloured skirt.
"OMFG WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU!", screamed Zetsu and Kisame. Sasori merely shook his head and sighed, "Why did I get stuck working with the crazy one?"
Itachi came walking down the hall clad in only his swim trunks. His long hair was hung over his shoulder in a loose ponytail as he reached up to brush away a stray hair from his face. Yes, fangirls everywhere were probably drowning in their own drool right now. "Hey Azuki-chan.", He said. Grinning mischeviously, he wrapped his arms around her and lightly nibbled at her earlobe. She looked around at the surrounding company, including a bewildered Deidara, and blushed. "I...Itachi...", she stuttered as a shorter boy with black hair walked up and began talking pictures. "I WILL HAVE MY REVENGE!" The obviously crazy boy screamed. Itachi ignored him and picked Azuki up in his arms like he was carrying an angel. "So", he kissed her lovingly while ignoring the annoying crazy kid with the camera, "..are we ready to go to the beach now?"
"Uhh...yup! I already put the bag-o-food in the car, now we should all get going!"
"Umm...yeah, about that...", muttered a young boy with shortish white hair and a scar over his eye. "How are we all gonna fit in one car?"
..."Uhh...you aren't!" Azuki hopped down and piled everyone into a medeival-style catapult and, cackling manically, used the scythe from Kirikiri Mai and sliced the cord holding the catapult in place. As everyone went flying, she, Itachi and Deidara watched in awe.
"I thought I was the only one who could fly, un..."
Itachi regained his composure and stared at Deidara with a WTF look on his face. "Deidara...why are you wearing a bikini?" He asked, noticing the Iwa-nin's strange taste in clothing.
"I'm expressing my artistic freedom, un."
-at the beach-
Everyone began recovering from being catapulted, and as a few people struggled to free thenselves from the sand, a boy with short red hair and panda eyes laughed, "Haha...suckers, I can control sand so nyah!" He said, floating away on a sand-carpet.
"Heeeeeey everyone!" Azuki piped as she walked towards the group. Deidara quickly ran down to the water screaming, "WHEEEEE!" with his arms open like an airplane. He sat down with Momijii and started building a sand castle.
As everyone was waving, the waves splooshed down and knocked the orange-haired guy into the ocean. He stood up, soaking wet, and cursed at the ocean.
"Tell me why I'm at the beach again?", asked a pissed-off looking man with black hair sitting under an umbrella next to a girl in a modified police squad uniform. "I..I don't know, sir. Its baffling.", she stuttered.
Azuki dashed into the clear blue-green water as a emotionless Itachi stood onshore. "I gotta watch out for them...for...the fangirls ..." He thought, looking from side to side. He tried to focus on making himself inconspicuous by folding his arms across his chest, but as he looked out into the water at the smiling young girl, he could't help but grin. "Well...I guess since I'm here, I might as well enjoy myself." He said as he walked into the water. He shivered at the sudden cool moisture touching his skin, "Its been a while since I went swimming...I guess it takes some getting used to." Suddenly he felt soft hands press down on his shoulders and in a quick motion he was pushed underwater. He abruptly came back to the surface and stared into the eyes of his attacker. "Gotcha, Ita-san!" Azuki laughed. Itachi sunk into the water leaving only his eyes visible and quickly grabbed her feet and pulled her under. She bobbed back up and looked at Itachi. 'Okay, you win." She said, coughing seawater and random sea foliage out of her mouth. She blushed as she looked at Itachi, his long hair floating all around his his submerged body. Then she started splashing him and other random members of the group. "Hehe..." Itachi thought, "I saw you blush, Azuki-chan.."
meanwhile, in a deeper part of the beach, something was lurking beneath the waters...
"Dun dun dun dun...", said the sharkman, humming the music from 'Jaws'. "Now THIS is what I call a party!" He thought as he swam freely throughout the water. He watched silently underwater as one of his fellow akatsuki pulled his girlfriend close and kissed her briefly before they got splashed by another nearby person. "Geez Itachi, go make out with your girlfriend in another ocean...I'm tryin' to swim in this one!"
Then Kisame got ate by a shark. Ironic, don'tcha think? He later realized it was his great aunt Mirdrid, who had never liked him anyways. "Damn the crazy relatives popping up everywhere...here, and earlier at Red Lobster!" he thought, remembering his shocking realization that someone had ordered fried shark steaks the other night. Someone with a spiral-y mask and a very polite method of speech. Zetsu had just ate the waiters.
After about an hour, Azuki, Itachi and Deidara all headed towards the food bag and dumped it onto a blanket.
"Lets see what you got...a pineapple...cheetohs...poptarts...weasels...", mumbled the crossdressing blonde as he rummaged through the stuff.
Those weasels. They had come back for more. But fo now they simply ran off to have a little weasel-party of their own with mini-water toys and everything.
"...aha! The perfect treat for a day at the beach, its time to SMASH THE WATERMELON!" Deidara cackled as he held the watermelon over his head. "Now, where's a bat...find a bat...bat bat bat bat bat bat..."
"Hey Itachi, I got a treat for you..." Azuki said slyly as she took out a small wooden bento box. She opened it revealingthree sticks of multicoloured dango, "Your favourite food!" His eyes lit up as she handed him a stick of the sweet dumplings. He bit off the red dumpling on top, "Fank jhoo...so mucct..." he said through a mouthful of dango. Azuki smiled and took a bite off of his stick of dango. "She's great..." Itachi thought as he chewed on his snack.
Meanwhile, a hoarde of other people had come by and abducted all the food except that which belonged to the weasels.
And Shigure sat down to eat a bowl of Reeses Puffs cereal. Its like Reeses, for breakfast!
Tama-chan skimmed through the water like...well, like a flying turtle. Naru drowned Keitaro for the 300th time. Tsunade, Yukari, Mitsune, Yuuko, and a buncha other people got out a case of sakè and got drunk off their asses.
"Y'know waaat?", slurred a nearly incomprehensable Tsunade, "Joo guys are mah besssssstest frendsss evar! Now, who wants more?" she poured an imaginary bottle of sakè into Yukari's cup.
"Yah. Lets sing the Beer Song!"
-after a few seconds-
"I CAN'T REMEMBER HOW MUCH I HAVE HAD! I DRANK A 12-PACK, WITH MY DAD!" they all burst out laughing, then continued to drink, until they started passing out one by one.
After a few more hours everyone except the drunken idiots started to pack up their crap so they could leave. And unfortunatley, since Azuki had left the catapult at home, they all had to walk the entire way home. With the weasels.
"Hey, you know those weird shounen-ai pairings on fanfiction websites, un?", asked Deidara, trying to start a conversation.
"Yeah. And before you ask, no, I will not make out with you.", Kisame said boredly.
"Eeew! DeixKisa pairings are weiiiird...", Deidara stuck out his tongue. "No, I was thinking...what if they had Tobi and Zetsu make out?"
"OMFG TOBIxZETSU!", some fangirls screamed as they ran home to type up their naughty fictions.
Zetsu sighed at the stupidity of Deidara. "You're forgetting a have a venus flytrap for a head."
"So you DO like Tobi?"
"NO!"
Hehehe...
Notes:
1.Itachi means weasel, thus explaining the whole 'what weasel are you talking about' confusion. Ita-san also loves multicoloured dango, or sweet dumplings on a stick. The crazy kid with camera is Itachi's little brother Sasuke, whom I find extremely annoying. But I will try to add more Sasuke in next chapter. OOC Sasuke... and also, I am a huge Tobi fan, and a huge Zetsu fan, but I am not a fan of TobixZetsu. It just sounds funny.The boy with short red hair and panda eyes is Sabaku no Gaara, who is the cutest little eyebrowless guy you'll ever see! Tsunade is the 5th hokage.
2. I love Momijii-kun, from Fruits Basket! He's the Rabbit, and he often dresses like a girl, so i put him in a girls bathing suit. I put Deidara in one too cuz I once drew a picture of Deidara as a girl and he/she was wearing a bikini like I described. The foul-tempered carrot top is Kyou, the cat, also from Furuba. Shigure (the one eating cereal) is the dog.
3. The 'young boy with shortish white hair and a scar over his eye' is Allen Walker from D-Grey Man, which is SO COOL! I can't believe they don't have a D-Grey Man section on here yet!
4. Kirikiri Mai is Temari's summoning-thing from Naruto. She summoned a giant weasel that has a huge scythe.
5. The two people under the unbrella are Alucard Hellsing and Seras Victoria from hellsing. They're vampires, so they can't go out in the sun. Makes no sense that they would be at a beach, but heh, thats the power of fanfiction for ya!
6. "SMASH THE WATERMELON!" Yes, this is an actual tradition in Japan. We (mostly teenagers from what I've seen) take a watermelon and a baseball bat/stick to the beach and crack the watermelon open to eat it. But watermelons are pretty expensive so I don't do it often.
7. Dango is sweet dumplings usually served on a bamboo stick. From what I've seen in the series and on websites, Itachi likes multicoloured dango.
8. Tama, Naru, Keitaro, and Mitsune are are characters from Love Hina. Tama is the flying turtle.
9. Yukari is the Language teacher from Azumanga Daioh. She's crazy.
10. Yuuko is the weird/cool/drunk lady from xxxHolic.
11. The beer song is this hilarious song I found on YouTube. Its about beer.
12. For those that don't know, shounen ai is like yaoi. If you don't know what that is, then you're probably better off not knowing.
Okay, thats all for shapter 3! Crossdressers! Yaaaaaaaaarrrrrr! I'll write more soon! Review!
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