Chapter Nineteen

Angela's Office

With more confidence in her voice, Alex stands up as she says. "No. I don't think he would ever do that to me, or anyone else." She looks Angela right in the eye. "I'm sure."

Angela nods her head and smiles.

Alex continues to stand. "If you take this situation and look at it straight on, it seems to be all on him but it's not, that woman, woman." She sneers. "That's a laugh. She has not only done this despicable thing to him she has done it to us. She doesn't deserve to have his child. He's too good for her."

Alex starts to walk around the office. "We have already discussed getting custody of the baby. I brought it up."

"That was a very unselfish thing for you to do."

"I was trying to be supportive. Bobby said something to me when I brought it up. I don't think I'd be able to look at this child and forget who its mother is."

Angela stays quiet.

"I told him look at it as the one and only good thing she has ever done in her life." Alex sits in the chair closest to the door. Tears start to fill her eyes. She shakes her head. "I don't want that baby in my house."

Alex grabs some tissues. "My God what a terrible thing to say but that's the way I feel. It has has nothing to do with the baby. Its' not the baby's fault and it is his child. I am so damn confused I don't know what I think."

"Yes you do."

"It's just a sweet and innocent life that has been brought to be because of a woman's sick and demented way of getting the attention of a man that she will never ever have." Alex pulls out three more tissues. "I think I'll need another box."

"I have plenty." Angela opens a closet door and puts a new box on the desk. "Here you go."

"Thanks." Alex sits and tries to compose her self. "In a way I understand her. If I ever told him that I felt sorry for her, he would probably laugh at me. If anyone is going to have his baby, it should be me. God that sounds so petty and selfish."

"Not if that's the way you feel. Have you discussed having a child?"

"No." She says sternly. "And now that this has happened I doubt we ever will. After all we're not in our twenties." She pauses "Or thirties." Alex snickers and shakes her head. .

"She may have taken the one chance in my life to have my own child." Alex tries but she can't stop the tears. She grabs more tissues. The tears slowly start to subside but now her angry is building.

"Goddamn, that bitch! I fucking hate her. I have never hated anyone in my life, but her, oh God." She wipes her eyes as she exhales. She starts to calm down.

"When Bobby went to talk to her a few weeks ago. I went with him. I was sitting on a bench in the hallway outside the visitor's room when she arrived. As she walked toward me she had the nerve to look at me with contempt." She pauses then looks at Angela. "Can you believe that? What gall."

"Have you talked to Bobby about any of this?"

"No. I haven't. I can handle this by myself………No I can't. No one can."

"Alex has your relationship with Bobby always been that you are afraid to tell him what and how you are feeling?"

She chuckles to herself. "No. Even before we started a relationship outside of work I have always been open and honest with him."

"Why have you stopped?"

"I've been trying to make it easier for him."

"Supporting him is one thing. Just saying things to him to make it easier won't help. You're giving him the answers that you think he wants to hear. You have to be honest with him and yourself. My advice to you is don't let these feelings fester. You have to tell him how you feel. I haven't known him a long time but he seems to me to be an honest and reasonable man. Talk to him."

Later That Night

Alex arrives at Bobby's house a little after 7 pm. "Bobby?"

"In here." He says as he walks out of the kitchen. "Well. How did it go?"

She walks toward him. "I'm glad I went. I feel so much better."

"You've been crying?" He touches her cheek.

"Yes. Almost all the way home but it's alright." She grabs his hand.

"We need to talk." She leads him to the couch and then they sit.

"I'm not sure where to start." She says.

"The window?" He says shyly.

"Oh. Yeah. The window that scared the hell out of me."

"It scared me too. You asked if I had ever done that before and I told you I had. Punching a few walls but this……… I have never been that angry in my life. If I wasn't close to the window I swear I might have thrown a chair through it."

"Like you did in Maryland." He nods his head. Alex rubs his back. "That also had to do with her."

"Not that it's an excuse but I was drunk that time." He pauses. "I know it was an immature and reckless thing to do. I didn't mean to scare you. I am so sorry for that. I would never ever want to do anything that would make you afraid of ………….."

She cuts him off. "I could never be afraid of you. I know you better than any person on this planet does. But I have to admit that for a second I tangled with the thought that you could." She turns her head away. "Hit me." She grabs his arm. "I'm sorry but it crossed my mind."

"What are you sorry for? Oh, man. Why didn't you say something before?"

She touches his face. "Then I remembered who you were and the kind of man you are and I knew that you could never, ever do that to me, or anyone else."

She has seen him angry, happy and sad but what she sees now is a look of total disappointment. "Don't. Don't look that way."

"You're right. This is about you not me."

"No, Bobby. This is about us. It's not just you and me anymore it's us. We both know who the enemy is and we'll have to deal with her together. Face it. You're stuck with me. I'm not going anywhere. I love you more than anything in this world."

The disappointed look has given way to a smile that light up his eyes. Alex smiles and her eyes start to tear. "I haven't seen you smile in almost a month."

He kisses her lightly and unconsciously starts to put his arm around her. "I think we better switch sides." She laughs. "Ok gimpy."

"Actually someone who is gimpy has trouble walking." She lightly hits his arm. "Oh shut up."

For the first time in over three weeks they both laugh. She snuggles in under his arm. "She's getting in between us and she's not even in the room."

He exhales and pulls her closer. "We have to let her go. We can't let her take over our lives. She's not that important."

She lays her head on his chest. "I know I brought up the custody of the baby, but I have to tell you…….. I don't want…………….The way I feel now I don't think…. I don't want that baby in this house. I know it was my idea but I was just trying to make things easier for you. And at the same time I was starting to resent you, her and that poor little innocent life." Tears start to fill her eyes.

"Thank you."

She looks up at him. "What?"

"For telling me exactly how you feel about all this." He squeezes her lightly.

"I know how important it would be for you to have a child."

"Not that important, you mean much more." He kisses the top of her head. "I meant what I said about not being able to look at that baby."

"Bobby, are we horrible people?"

"No I don't think so. If I, we feel resentment now what guarantee do we have that it will ever go away." He sits up straight. "I don't think I could lie to that child its whole life as to who its mother is and no child should have to go through that." He exhales loudly. "I think the best thing to do now………….is nothing. Let's just wait and see. Maybe, later we'll feel different."

Saturday Morning

"Oh man I forgot all about this."

"What?"

"The car show. It's tomorrow."

"Are you still going to go?"

"Do you mind?"

"No go have fun."

The phone rings. Alex sets down her coffee mug. "I'll get it."

"Hello."

"Hi Alex. It's Kenny. How are you?"

"Good. How are you doing?"

"Hanging in there, is Bobby there?"

"Yeah he's right here. Hold on." She covers the mouthpiece. "Bobby its Kenny."

She holds out the phone for him. "Thanks. Hey Kenny what's up?"

"Nicole's lawyer just called me…………..Man I thought this would be an easy thing to say."

TBC