Thank you all so much to my wonderful reviewers! Each and every review means a lot to me! Thank you!

This chapter is especially dedicated to SNOWMIRAGE and GAKU NAMIKIRI for making my day extra special! Don't die on me you guys! Here's the latest chapter!

Disclaimer: I don't own Gakuen Alice.

\\\\\\
Two Quarters And A Heart Down
3: Father
\\\\\\\

I fingered the dolphin-shaped mark on my chest.

Buttoning a fresh school blouse, I closed my eyes and sighed. I flopped onto my bed and stared at the ceiling.

"You know the drill."

I rolled to my side and looked out of the window, remembering the times the darned woman Urumi made me wear the blasted control device.

Over the years, I wore the device for durations ranging from a few days to several months. Then, Urumi would take it off for ridiculously long periods of time then force the thing on me again. Each Emotion Control device had its own settings on which emotions to dispel and allow, much like a permeable cell membrane.

There were rare days when I would be happy and she'd stick a device on me that dispelled happiness. There were days when I got moody and she'd force a control device on me that didn't even allow me to feel sad.

Her favourite days were when she had treated me especially abusive and I'd be forced to wear a device that dispelled my hatred toward her.

It was sickening.

The changes were always so distract it was always a challenge to adapt. One was forced to become unfeeling, throwing away all emotions just to skive away from a little bit of pain.

But emotions always came back and the truth was, the pain the devices brought was far from little.

Like the certain emotions each device was set for, the devices had different levels and types of pain too. It was never easy to endure.

I liked to believe that the blasted woman sprung those periodic changes on me just to fulfil her own sadistic pleasures; this only fuelled my hatred toward her. Hatred was an emotion that this particular device allowed, I found, and I smirked at that.

At least I'd be allowed to keep one constant emotion.

I blinked. I had been looking out of my room window, which had a clear view of one of the Academy's clock towers, but I wasn't really seeing. Classes were due to start in fifteen minutes.

I jumped out of bed and grabbed the map Misaki-sensei had provided me with. I passed by the mirror in my room and, once again, I was forced to stop and look at my reflection in shock.

It wasn't because of a bad hair day or anything like that; I just remembered that I had left my hair down during the previous night's mission.

In an attempt to avoid recognition from a certain teenage boy, I quickly pulled my hair back in a half-pony, securing it with Kenta's pale yellow barrette. As I peered at myself in the mirror, I saw something white poking out from the dresser.

I pulled it out: it was a photograph of Hotaru and I from the fourth grade.

The ten-year-old me was hugging Hotaru, and, in a rare display of emotion, the ten-year-old Hotaru was smiling at the camera. It was small but a smile nonetheless.

I felt searing, hot pain rise in my chest as I thought about Hotaru. There were countless questions in my head of what she'd do to me after today but I dismissed such thoughts and the pain in my chest left almost immediately.

What really haunted me were my eyes.

I looked at my reflection in the mirror once more. My eyes in the photograph were big, round and child-like, shining with exuberance and zest for life. My eyes in the reflection weren't as big and round and they had lost their childish innocence. The shine was gone from them and a dull, pained expression dominated my olive irises. Despair and death haunted my eyes and made them look hollow, unfocused, and almost catatonic.

I shuddered. The girl staring at me had eyes that were too old for her face.

I tore my gaze away from this empty shell of a child. I threw the photograph back in its drawer, ripped the duvet from my bed and covered the mirror.

Glancing at the clock tower, I only had ten minutes to amble through the campus to get to class in time.

\\\\\\

I've learned that fate was never kind.

There were always two sides to a story but no matter how careful you've been along the way, your destiny was set for you before birth.

I used to think I could change fate, but, as I grew older, I learnt that the little turnarounds in life were part of fate after all. I no longer wished to change fate or go back in time; I learnt to just observe, be an outsider in my own life and watch what happens as time goes by, making its mark and exemplifying those affected.

Fate was never kind.

Just as when you're about to accept your destiny and move on, your past comes back to haunt you.

I couldn't help but feel a little nostalgic as I bumped into someone on my way to class; I was late, just like old times.

But this time, the victim of my blunder wasn't the notorious Natsume Hyuuga. It was someone whom I've always known to come extra early for classes, finishing up whatever crazy invention she was currently working on.

Deep, purple irises met my olive ones and widened slightly.

I found this rather amusing --- another show of emotion from the ice queen, Hotaru Imai. I felt a rush of affection for this girl and I had to fend off innate impulses to hug her as I battled the pain the damned device was causing me.

I resorted to taking note of her changes instead.

Hotaru had grown her hair to her shoulders. We were the same height though she remained as pale as ever. I noticed that she was panting slightly and there was sweat on her brow when we almost walked into each other round the corner.

I wondered why she was late for class. I wondered what she had been doing before this that had made her late. And, I added with another hint of affectionate amusement, which the dolphin-shaped mark punished me with a stinging sensation in my chest, if she was late for class, why didn't she just get onto that trademark swan-mobile of hers?

Time itself seemed to slow down at that moment, the two of us just standing there gazing at each other. We had intuitively recognised the other and were peering into each other's eyes, scrutinising, analysing, attempting to see into the window of the other's soul, looking for clues as to how the other had lived the past six years.

I felt content playing this guessing game with our eyes. I didn't want her to speak lest ruin the moment.

Besides, I didn't want to hear her hurtful words, accusing me for suddenly disappearing all those years ago.

But fate was never kind, and time cruelly resumed its place in the world again, motion back in motion.

Time manifested itself in the form of a loud and annoying school bell, signalling the start of classes.

I glanced at Hotaru, keeping a poker face on.

To my surprise, she gave a small smile. The same small, sheepish smile that was in the photograph I saw this morning.

Hotaru shook my right hand. "Welcome to Alice Academy," she said in that familiar, soft, monotonous voice of hers. "The first-years of the high school division have been split into three classes. I'm Hotaru Imai, vice-head of class A."

I smiled warmly at her, melting away the emotionless mask I was previously resorted to hide behind. I gave her hand a small squeeze. "I'm Mikan Sakura," my voice sounded faraway to my own ears. "I'll be joining you in class A. It's good to be back at the Academy."

I ignored the inflammation in my chest as Hotaru and I walked to our classroom, hand-in-hand like a pair of innocent children.

Hotaru was worth the pain.

She was worth it.

\\\\\\

I really wasn't sure what to expect when I met my new and old classmates.

I was sure that a lot of new students had joined our cohort since I left, since we were split into three classes and there were only about forty of us in class B when back in elementary school.

I remembered all the ruckus we had caused back then, and that was probably why my batch was split into three classes, in an attempt to abolish the mischief we were previously infamous for.

As we were nearing the classroom, I heard the cacophony of voices and the scraping of chairs against wood. My classmates were within my radius of familiarity and I tried to identify their Alices in an attempt to distract myself from the growing pain the device was causing me.

I felt like I was burning alive. Since the mark was placed above my heart, the pain started there and spread gradually.

I couldn't help it; I was that happy being reunited with my best friend.

I tried not to think about what feelings would ensue from my reunions with old acquaintances as well. This dolphin-shaped device definitely disapproved of happiness and affection. What about Natsume? How much pain is he going to cost me? Is he worth the pain?

Natsume was worth the pain.

I concentrated on identifying the Alices. I recognised some familiar ones like Yuu's Alice of Illusion. I also identified some erratically familiar ones such as those of Remote Hearing ability. I picked up a few unfamiliar Alices too --- Plant Transformation and a bizarre one that could make inanimate objects come to life, but only for a short period of time.

I tried sensing Fire and Animal Pheromone but they were out of my radius.

I felt my body temperature increase rapidly and Hotaru let go of my hand as though she'd just been scalded.

I wasn't sweating because the pain was coming from the inside and I had reapplied the poker face too. I was going to keel over any second --- the pain I got from just being around Hotaru was overwhelming me.

"Ah! Mikan-chan! There you are!"

I turned around and saw Narumi-sensei fast approaching. He smiled brightly at us, seemingly unperturbed by my reaction toward him the previous day. "Ne, Imai-san, it's not like you to be late for class," he chirped. "It's a good thing the headmaster held Jinno-sensei up or you'd have gotten into trouble. Remember, he's your form teacher now."

He looked me straight in the eye. "Mikan-chan, you'll be excused from your morning classes. The headmaster would like to see you."

I nodded and followed Narumi-sensei out of the high school building. I was actually relieved at the sudden intrusion. The pain subsided a little.

After a while, I heard Hotaru open the door and walk in.

\\\\\

What was I suppose to expect of my father?

I didn't want anyone to treat me as though they had certain expectations I was required to fill so I decided not to treat others like that as well.

But still… I couldn't help but expect something from my father. A show of fatherly affection toward his daughter? An explanation? A reason for leaving me behind with my grandfather when he could have raised me himself? Why didn't he let me know who he was when I first came to the Academy?

The three of us --- Narumi-sensei, my father and myself --- were sitting at a round table in a clearing in the forest.

I stole a glance at the esteemed headmaster. There was no doubt he was my biological father --- we shared the same hair and eye colours though his were slightly darker. He looked rather young, the same age as Narumi-sensei --- early to mid thirties.

He put down his teacup and Narumi-sensei started refilling it. "Mikan," he said softly, his eyes twinkling. His voice was deep and soothing. "You look just like your mother."

He clasped his hands together and smiled warmly at me. I didn't return the smile. "My name is Yuki Aoshi, headmaster of the high school division. I'm your father."

My poker face was still on and I stared at him listlessly. Yeah, yeah, tell me something I don't already know.

He chuckled at my indolence. "I suppose you're waiting for an explanation of sorts?"

He took another sip of tea. "It was complicated." His voice took on a pained, sad tone, as though forcing himself to remember a harrowing ordeal. "Our romance was so sudden, a whirlwind of sorts. I knew nothing about her and she knew nothing about me. But we fell in love."

A sigh. Another sip of tea.

"When we realised who the other was, it was too late to go back in time and reverse it." He meant my mother's pregnancy. "We couldn't get married because of… familial complications." I knew those complications, of course. Urumi had teased me for years about being an unwanted child. "You know, you were born right here on campus, in the Alice Academy hospital."

I cringed. I didn't know why but every single word he spoke evoked different emotions in me. I wasn't even thinking about what he said; I was merely listening, observing. The device was causing me immense pain.

Aoshi-san took another sip of tea. His emerald eyes focused on me as I struggled to regain my composure. I felt stupid; surely I looked constipated like this. I felt Narumi-sensei's eyes on me, too.

"When you were born, there was a dispute over whose side of the family you should inherit, Mikan. Your mother decided to settle the matter herself. She left the Academy in her last year of high school. She took you to your grandfather and said that when you grew up, you'd decide which side to fight for yourself. She didn't even come back for graduation, and I've never seen her since."

Remorse stained his emerald irises. He downed his cup of tea and stood up. Narumi-sensei stood too and I followed suit.

Aoshi-san clamped a hand on my shoulder and gave a light squeeze. "You're very quiet, Mikan," he chuckled. He took a thick, white envelope from his pocket and handed it to me. "5000 rabbits, just for you. Buy yourself something nice, Mikan. I want to see you smile."

He began walking away. "Just think of it as a small father-to-daughter gift," he winked at me. "Mikan, your time is coming soon. I hope you choose my side. Fight for the Academy, for your friends."

My emotionless mask was fixed back on as I stared after him, walking back to headquarters.

He left me feeling angry at his words and I felt tears threatening to spill out of my eyes.

"Mikan?" Narumi-sensei inquired gently.

I didn't consider the headmaster to be my father. To me, he was just Aoshi-san, headmaster. He wasn't anything like a father should be, or at least he wasn't anything like the father I dreamt of having as a child.

He didn't ruffle my hair or kiss my forehead the way Hotaru's dad did when we were little. He didn't hug me and tell me I was pretty or comfort me the way Narumi-sensei did when I tried escaping from the Academy to see Jii-chan.

All he did was tell me the story of how much my mother wanted to get rid of me, pass the burden to me. Then he bribed me with money, a trivial thing, in an attempt to win me over. I was disgusted. He didn't even once mention my mother's name.

No, he wasn't my father.

"Narumi-sensei…" I choked out.

Narumi-sensei became alarmed. He saw the tears leaving traces on my cheeks and he engulfed me in an embrace. "It's alright Mikan," he coaxed, gently and softly. "It's alright to cry."

My knees buckled and I buried my face in his chest, crying for all I was worth. I cried for sadness, anger and disappointment. I cried for love. And I even cried for the pain the control device was dishing out now.

I was an unwanted child, through and through.

"He's not my father," I bawled into Narumi-sensei's chest. "He's not my dad."

Narumi-sensei rubbed my back. Understanding was evident in his eyes. Even he knew what a jerk my so-called father was.

After what seemed like hours, the pain the device was causing me became unbearable and I fought to push away my emotions.

The device had certainly gotten a workout today.

"I'm sorry," I said softly, putting my mask in place and finding the ground very interesting to look at.

I was tired and Narumi-sensei decided to take me to his house to get cleaned up, for the second time that day.

"Narumi-sensei?'

"Yes, Mikan?"

"That woman Aoshi-san was talking about --- my mother, I mean, she's that friend of yours, right? The one with the Nullifying Alice?"

"Yes, Mikan."

"When I first came to the Academy, did you know I was her daughter? I mean, Aoshi-san did say that I looked just like her."

We stopped walking. Narumi-sensei grasped my shoulders. "You've gotten taller, Mikan," he joked. Then his face turned serious. "I can't say I was completely oblivious to that fact, Mikan. Yes, I knew and back in my days at the Academy, I loved your mother very much. She was my best friend."

He stroked my hair and smiled tenderly. "Listen, Mikan. You're not your mother nor are you your father. You don't always have to take sides. You should do what you feel is right but there's no need to rush through it; there's plenty of time. Remember that you can always talk to your friends when you need help and I'll always be here to see you through the good and bad times. Don't let the past get you down. You should smile and look forward to your future."

I ignored the pain swelling in my chest and swallowed the lump in my throat.

I hugged Narumi-sensei, throwing him off-guard.

"I love you, Dad."

\\\\\

Narumi-sensei let me sleep through my morning classes. He woke me up in time for lunch.

And, like a little kid being sent off to school, I ran out of his house shouting and waving, "Bye, Dad!" and he was sticking his head out of the window waving back happily. "Be a good girl on your first day of school!"

After today, I was definitely getting the hand of battling the pain the device inflicted on me every time I felt an inappropriate emotion.

Surely Urumi would know what I've been up to today and she'd punish me for it later.

I put my mask back in place as I approached student-infested territory. I walked calmly around the campus, looking for Kenta. I was going to ask him to go to Central Town with me after classes.

I stopped and suddenly remembered Hotaru. She seemed pleased to see me earlier that morning, not at all angry. I should invite her instead.

"I heard Mikan's back at the Academy."

I hid behind a wall at that. Someone was talking about me?

"That's great news for Hotaru! You know she hasn't spoken to anyone, not even Iinchou, ever since Mikan left. Maybe she'll start letting others come into her lab again too."

Hotaru? Shutting herself away from the world? And because of me?

I slowly backed away from the wall I was hiding behind. The sun was high in the sky and I wanted to find Hotaru to verify this.

A soft gasp escaped my lips as a pair of strong arms encircled me from behind. A male voice huskily whispered in my ear, "Why didn't you tell me you were back?"

The arms suddenly released their hold on me and spun me around, pinning my back against a tree.

"I'm not an idiot. I knew it was you last night."

Locks of raven hair fell into a pair of intense, ruby red eyes.

It was Natsume.

\\\\\\

To be continued...

I feel bad for taking so long to update, really. I'll try to post chapter four by today as well! I'll write as much as I can before I have to go back to school on Monday.

Reviews please!