"Okay, I have everyone's name written on a piece of paper and I stuffed them into this bag." Kisame said. "Deidara, it looks like a 7 year old hung those bows and that garland, but we need to draw names so everyone knows who got who. Here, Sasori you draw first." Kisame held the bag in front of Sasori. Then it went to Hidan, then Tobi, then Itachi, then Zetsu then Deidara, then Kakuzu, then Kisame picked the last one. "Now everyone quickly look at who you have and don't say it out loud!" Kisame instructed. Everyone did exactly as instructed. There was a long pause.

"Well, now that that's over with I guess we can finish our decorating." Kisame said. Tobi ran off to find the Christmas tree skirt, Kakuzu went to pick Christmas ornament hooks off the floor, Hidan was setting up a small nativity in his bedroom and everyone else had dispersed to do other Christmas themed things….except Itachi.

"Hey….who did you get?" He asked Zetsu.

"Dude, I'm not going to tell you that!" Zetsu said.

"No, you don't understand I HAVE to have Deidara. I have the perfect gift for him and I have to give it to him." Itachi told Zetsu.

"Oh, well I got Hidan." Itachi left Zetsu alone and tracked down Sasori.

"Dude, who did you draw?"

"I'm not taking your ridiculous requests like last year." Sasori answered.

"No, it's not that. I need to have Deidara's name."

"Sorry, I got Kisame." And so Itachi started to get pissed. He found Kisame in the closet digging out the giant stash of Christmas cards they were going to send.

"Kisame, who did you draw?"

"Itachi, I'm sorry that last year the gift you got sucked ass but…"

"No, no no…..I need to know if you got Deidara's name."

"Yeah, actually I did draw him."

"Okay, okay trade me. I have Tobi. I bought a giant pack of balloons a month ago in the off chance I would draw his name."

"Okay, but there is one thing….what the hell did you do to Deidara that you have to make up for it now?" Kisame asked. Itachi looked shameful for the first time in his life.

"I wore his cream colored cashmere sweater to one of Dana's parties and spilt red wine down the front of it when I was making our with her."

"Man, you better get him something good….he was a babe magnet in that sweater…I mean it's not like he isn't already but damn! Did you ever see him in that sweater?" Kisame asked.

"You're odd." Itachi made the trade and all was calm in the akatsuki apartment. However, only 12 seconds later there was a shrill scream in Itachi and Deidara's bedroom. And of course Deidara came running down the hall.

"Oh my god! Itachi come here, yeah! Come here!" Itachi rolled his eyes and turned around only to find Deidara in his face.

"Deidara what the hell do you….OH MY GOD!"

"RED TAG SALE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" they both screamed in unison like the girls they were. And the screaming continued.

"Look, look! Prices reduced 50 to 75 percent, yeah!"

"Oh my god! Would you two shut the fuck up! You are such pussy's! Both of you! Go to the sale! You know you want to! God!" Sasori was not happy when so much screaming happened in the apartment. Well, now Deidara was ready to cry and Itachi was calling Sasori every name in the book; and when Itachi started with his incessant string of 'you sorry ass fucker', 'piece of shit puppet' and 'stupid ass bitch' things always got dramatic. It was best for Itachi and Deidara to just leave for the sale and allow Sasori to calm down.

"Would you shut up! Christmas is too a religious holiday!" Hidan yelled at Kakuzu. "It's a Christian holiday!"

"Okay, then since you like holidays so much then why didn't you celebrate Arbor Day!"

"Because dumb ass! I'm not Canadian!" Hidan yelled.

"Oh my god! Holiday's know no nationality!" Kakuzu argued.

"If holiday's know no holiday then why do you never EVER recognize groundhog day!?"

"Oooooh! You…..bitch! Take that back! You know groundhogs freak me out!" Kakuzu shouted.

"Oh my god! Kakuzu how many times do we have to go through this! Groundhogs are like a big fucking gerbil, seriously!"

"Yeah, if gerbils were totally…..wacked out!" And this fight continued until Hidan got sidetracked with Christmas cards that Kisame had brought out from the hallway. Hidan and Kisame made the Christmas card list and Hidan began sorting colored envelopes. Kisame ordered Zetsu to the store to get stamps. It was time to spread Christmas cheer!