As I was sayin I think it would be a good idea to stick to one general area. Ya know, get a job, a room…it's been so long since I've slept in a bed and well what else am I doin with my life but sulkin around. So good there's a new years resolution for ya…I'm finally going to grow up and settle down. I figure I'll just go down this road here…see there… see all these taverns and liquor joints. Well all I have to do is wait. Wait until some ploughed guy walks through that swingin door..rob'em blind…and in no time I got easy money. First I'll get a sandwich…then I get a room in a cheap lodging house…ok time to stop dreamin here he comes.
See how easy that was…a quick bump…a flick of the wrist… sticky fingers and what do I get…15 bucks…man I should do this more often. You are probably surprised at how I could get so much money but all you have to do is wait outside a bar for a rich lookin drunk guy to step through. Of course this could be an extreme pain in the ass. Do you know how long you would have to wait out of these slimy places for an upper-crust jerk to pull through? Well lets just say I wouldn't set my watch to it…if I had one that is. Besides look at all the risks. I mean anybody could of saw me…lets say a cop then I'm in the refuge…lets say another crook well then I'm out of the money and probably a black eye to boot. Thats why you have to start slow…work your way up…be smart. I'll tell ya half the people locked up deserve to be there…not for doin the crime…but for bein stupid enough to get caught.
Well enough boring you wit antidotes, I gotta get something ta eat before I talk yer ear off. Ok first things first gotta find a cheap joint. I would just go to a vendor but who knows what they put inta that food. I mean at least a restaurant has gotta have some type of health code…even if it is foraged. Where to eat where to eat…ah there's a place and it's just runed down enough too…not to slummy to get ya sick…and not to hoity toity ta get ya thrown outta. It's gotta big sign over the top that says Tibbeys. So to give ya a play by play I walk in…sit in a booth and wait for a waiter to grace me wit his presence. I figger I'll get a roast beef sandwich wit uhh horseradish. The waiter comes and I place my order.
Once the guy turns I hear a little ding of the bell that's over the door. And what comes through but a sea of loud confusion…correction a sea of loud, smelly, dirty confusion. Shit I wish they'd shut up…my head is poundin enough cause of not eatin for three days, the last thing I need is a bunch a singin cockroaches climbin the walls. I tell ya if those boys weren't like 5 times bigger and 10 times stronger then me I'd give um a piece of my mind. But what ya gunna do right. I leave after finishin my lunch...but before I can walk through the door…this goon wit what else but a cow boy hat and a bandanna plows right inta me. I swear bein born and raised in the creepiest city on earth you would think I have seen it all! Oh well on to that warm bed…