Title: Legally Sane
Pairings: HieixOC
Disclaimer: I do not own Yu Yu Hakusho, I do however, own my OC and the story.
Chapter Four: Of Meetings and Enlightenment
I was woken up not long after I'd fallen asleep in Hiei's arms (Well it seemed that way to me…), by a disgruntled fire demon. The curtains were drawn roughly to the side, allowing a shaft of irritatingly dull light into the room, and smack dab in the middle of my face.
"Onna, wake up."
The demand fell on sleep muffled ears, and I merely rolled onto my stomach, my face burrowing into the pillow.
"G'way…S'too early," I grumbled sleepily in reply, drawing my covers over my head to block out the intrusion.
There was a low growl, and the duvet was pulled off of me, exposing my barely clothed body to the cool temperature of the room. In response, my body curled up into a tight ball, my entire frame quaking from the cold.
"Onna, I do not have the patience for this. If you don't get up, I'll use force if necessary."
I guess I must not have given him a favourable answer, as he released yet another growl and I found myself hoisted up into his arms for what seemed to be the second time in the last four or five hours. I immediately snuggled into his chest, unconsciously drawing whatever heat I could from his body- But my efforts were all been in vain, as my body was dumped abruptly into the tub and subjected to sub-zero temperatures.
My screams echoed through the virtually silent compound.
"Aiiiiieeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee! Hiei you bastard, I'm gonna kill you!"
I jumped out of the bath like a scalded cat, and stood there soaked and shivering. The scarlet-eyed boy merely smirked, and waved a bandaged hand at me as he exited the room in a blur.
"Get dressed onna…" Floated back over his shoulder, and I scowled- Hissing and spitting like an offended kitten.
"Hiei no baka!" I shrieked after him, my hands already adjusting the temperature of the water to better suit my needs.
I showered quickly, only taking the time to do my hair- If I didn't, then it would end up poofing out like a terrible afro; don't ask me why I was cursed with shitty hair. Soon enough, and I was back in the spare room, eyeing some folded clothes that Yukina had lain out for me- And from the looks of them, they had belonged to the little darling.
A kimono. Did God hate me? Who in their right mind, would wear something so feminine and outdated? This wasn't old school Japan y'know. Then again, Yukina's clothes were probably the only ones that would fit me…Other than Hiei's.
Idea time! I opened my mouth to call out to the irritable boy, only to be cut off before I'd gotten a word out.
'No onna…I'm not lending you any of my clothes.' was muttered strangely enough in my mind. I was about to question it, but thought better of it. He was a demon, so perhaps this was one of his abilities.
"Why not?!" I practically cried, the smooth fabric of the kimono slightly crushed in my frenzied grip.
'Because I said so. Now hayakusiro and get dressed. This subject is not open for debate.'
His voice held an exasperated tone in it, and I quickly did as I was told. Well…I tried to slip the thing over my head, only for it to get caught around my shoulders. Okay, I scratched that plan. Then I tried to pull it up my legs, but the fabric had bunched up around my hips, refusing to go any higher.
"How the hell do you put this thing on?!" I scowled, hopping from side to side in the 'Hip wriggle' dance I was so fond of- This usually didn't happen until after Christmas when I'd eaten way too much apple crumble.
A muffled giggle caught my attention, and I shot the intruder a frustrated glare from beneath my partially dry, yet hideously tangled hair. Yukina stood in the doorway with a hand clapped over her mouth, her eyes watering with mirth. My own lips quirked in a rueful grin, wondering what I looked like, hopping around like this.
"T-that's not how you put on a kimono…" she stuttered cheerfully, her steps light and hurried as she entered my room.
"Yeah, I think I finally got that…" I muttered, stepping out of the irritating fabric.
The mint-haired darling smiled shyly at me, her cheeks dusted with pink. What? Oh yeah…I was semi-nude; but still, I was a girl! Hadn't she seen another female partially naked before?
"Okay, hold your arms out for me, Lydia-san," she murmured quietly, and I immediately lifted them.
She slipped the cool material over my arms, and pulled the flaps together until I was completely wrapped up in the stuff. I blinked at the sudden weight on my body, but remained stock still, as she continued to move around me. A thicker, broader piece of cloth was deftly wrapped around my waist, and intricately tied at the small of my back- And I almost choked on my own breath as it squeezed the oxygen from my lungs. Damn it was tight!
"All done," the koorime chirped, stepping back to admire her handiwork.
I did an about-face and stared at myself in the full-length mirror behind me. My eyes almost popped out of their sockets. Staring back at me from the flawless glass…Was me, only hella better looking. The dark blue of the kimono enhanced the cyan that was hidden within the depths of my eyes, the grey receding into nothingness it seemed; and the way she'd wrapped the cloth around my frame, made me look like I actually had some feminine assets. I was pleased!
"It suits you."
"Hontou?"
Yukina smiled and nodded as she proceeded to leave the room just as quickly as she had arrived.
It was raining; the sky had dulled to a steely grey punctuated with luminescent streaks of lightening, followed closely by roars of thunder. I strode over to the window and curled up on the sill glancing around the spare room that seemed to belong to me now at Genkai's temple. I'd been given a moment of respite from the others, left alone in the peace and quiet of my own solitude.
My eyes closed briefly, and the mild horror from the night before rose up to suffocate me, the stench of death that had been present at the scene caused me to choke on my own laboured breaths.
"…Lydia…?"
The voice brought me back to my senses, my body jerked once and subsided into slight shivers as my eyes flickered open. A panic attack? I hadn't had one of those since I was small. Strange. I glanced at the door, and saw the worried face of the usually cheerful Botan. Pasting a smile on my lips, I arched a brow in enquiry at the bubbly ferry-girl. I hadn't expected someone to come to collect me so soon after Yukina had left.
"Nani?"
Botan frowned at me, then shook her head as if to clear it. "We're all ready to go, so…" she trailed off meaningfully.
"Hai, I'll be right there." I murmured in return, feeling a small amount of relief as she slipped soundlessly from the room.
Ready to go- Go where? I hadn't been given any specifics on the matter, but I'd heard some muffled conversation from the others last night when I'd first been brought in, barely conscious. They'd mentioned something about 'Koenma' and 'Reikai' but I'd totally lost interest and had fallen asleep still cradled to Hiei's chest.
Releasing a sigh, I slipped from my perch and almost stumbled over my own feet. I looked down and realised that the cut of the kimono left little room for manoeuvring from the waist down- It was too tight, restricting movement. Cursing softly, I toddled over to the door, slid it open, and carried on down the hall to the front of the temple where the others awaited my presence.
I paused briefly to slip on some sandals that had been left on the porch for me, and when I raised my head to wish everyone a good morning, I was met with quite a few odd stares.
The stunned silence stretched…Until I broke it with a terse; "Nani?!" The looks were freaking me out, for Kami's sake!
"Betsuni…Though I think I speak on behalf of the rest of us when I say; You're looking decidedly comely today, Lydia-san."
Kurama was the one to answer my question, and I merely gaped in astonishment, before going beet red. "Iie! It's just the clothes I guess!" I nervously rubbed the back of my head, my eyes downcast in a display of uncharacteristic shyness. Damn…
I felt a presence at my shoulder, and I gave the person a sidelong look. It was Hiei, and he looked even more sullen than usual (If that were even possible). My eyebrow rose a notch, and his eyes narrowed. Whoops…
"Ikimasho, mina-san?" Botan asked, her oar in one hand (Where the hell had it come from?!), whilst the other was held shoulder level in front of her.
Everyone nodded, except for me, and the ferry-girl muttered a few words beneath her breath. I watched on in fascination, which quickly turned to horror as a gaping void appeared at the end of her fingertips, and it was steadily growing wider. After a moment or two, she gestured with her oar for us to stroll in, and that was where I drew the line.
"No."
The others glanced at me, and I stubbornly folded my arms across my chest, my face deadpanning at the lot of them.
"What's the matter, Lydia-chan?" Botan asked, sweat appearing at the side of her face as she tried to control the portal.
"There is no way in hell that I'm gonna set foot in that thing,"
"I don't think this is the time to be discussing this…" Kurama interceded, shooting me a look that clearly said; 'Get in the damn portal!'
I sniffed, and turned my back on the group. What did these people take me for? An arm snaked around my waist, and I squeaked in distress. Peering over my shoulder, I caught a glimpse of my 'Guard' and bit back a shriek of terror. Little Hiei was pissed off to the max, and the strange black glow that emanated from his person spoke volumes.
"M-matte, kudasai!" I yelled, wriggling within his grasp. "I swear if you throw me in there I'll-…"
My threat was cut off, another ear splitting shriek deafening those around me, as I hurtled out of Hiei's grasp and into the darkness behind me.
"Remind me where we're going again?"
An audible sigh from my left had my eyebrow twitching in annoyance. What?! I couldn't help it if my brain was a sieve…It also didn't help that it had been Hiei who had been handing me the information. After tossing me into that terrifying vortex earlier, was it any wonder that I wasn't speaking, let alone listening to the guy?
'Bastard Hiei…I swear I'm gonna get him when he least expects it…' I mentally snarled, my eyes boring into the back of his skull.
'I highly doubt that onna. Don't attempt anything foolish, or it'll be the end of you.' Came the sudden reply.
My eyes widened considerably, and I cursed myself for forgetting that the little shrimp was reading my mind.
'I heard that.'
I flinched visibly, and gave the fire apparition a sidelong glance. Sure enough, his hand was resting ever so lightly on the hilt of his sword, and the scowl he sent my way wasn't particularly comforting. I resisted the urge to shriek hysterically, and instead skipped a few steps ahead to walk beside Kurama.
"Well…?" I enquired after another moment of silence, shooting the redhead an expectant look.
"We're going to see Koenma." Kurama murmured after a moment, smiling slightly at me and I muttered a soft "Oh."
Yusuke nudged Kurama out of the way and sidled up next to me on one side, Kuwabara on the other, both casually slipping their arms around my shoulders. I blinked in confusion, Hiei's growl barely registering in my mind. Wait, did Hiei just growl? Before I could pursue that train of thought, Yusuke leaned in conspiratorially, an eyebrow raising comically.
"You do know who Koenma is, right?" he asked with a frown, nonchalantly winking at the carrot-top. It didn't go unnoticed by me, but the meaning behind it also didn't register either. I thought he had something in his eye…
"No, should I?"
"Koenma is the King of Hell," Kuwabara explained in all-seriousness, "And…Well, you remember those demons that attacked you, right?"
I blanched and nodded silently, urging them to continue.
"Well…He's ten times worse."
I felt the bottom drop out of my stomach, and I suddenly felt my knees grow weak and shaky. Breathe, Lydia! You've got all of these guys with you, what could possibly go wrong?
"O-oh…?" I managed to squeak out, trying to sound interested.
Hiei snorted derisively behind me, and Kurama muttered something about "…scaring the girl to death." I ignored them, and focused on the titbits of information the boys were handing me free of charge.
"He's quite fond of devouring virgin sacrifices to appease his insatiable hunger;" Kuwabara chimed in, his voice high pitched and quavering. I believed it was from his fear for my personal safety.
"Yes, he's quite the tyrant, and he believes that first impressions are everything." Yusuke stressed the last word, and I continued to nod like the Churchill Direct dog. "So, what you need to do to avoid invoking his spiritual wrath is…"
Here he reverted to whispering some pointers in my ear, and I inclined my head in understanding.
"So…I just have to do that, and he won't devour me?"
Yusuke and Kuwabara bobbed their heads, and gave me what I thought of as encouraging grins. Kurama frowned at the three of us, and rubbed the side of his head. I glanced at Hiei, and he pointedly looked away.
"We're here!" Botan called out, poking her head around the corner she'd previously disappeared around; "Hurry up! He seems to be in a foul mood today…Can't say I know why!"
How the hell could she be so cheerful about something like that?! The guy was a virgin munching beast, and he was in a 'foul' mood?? This spelt disaster for me, and I could hear the distant bells, chiming sorrowfully in preparation for my death march.
I rounded the corner with the boys, and was ultimately greeted with a huge ass set of doors. I seriously mean it! Who freaking lived here? Godzilla?! My nerves frayed all the more at this point, and I took an involuntarily step back as the doors slowly creaked open. Actually, it was a giant leap. I think I surprised everyone with my speed.
Everyone's attention was on whatever was residing in the room, and using that as a distraction, I slowly sidled away from them. I slowly turned my back on the lot of them, deciding that it was better that they were eaten, rather than me. Hopefully, nobody would notice me sneaking off…
"Where do ya think you're goin?"
A hand grasped me by the scruff of my kimono, and I almost gagged from the pressure on my windpipe. Waving my hand to signal defeat as well as for the need of oxygen, the grip loosened and I glared at a smirking Yusuke.
"Come in. I don't have all day you know."
The slightly bored, yet frazzled voice had me moving instantly. And when I say instantly, I mean instantly. I shot through the open doors like a bullet, and immediately dropped onto my hands and knees in a form of subjugation. Unfortunately, I ended up skidding along the marble floor on my hands and knees until I was mere inches from the Great One's desk. Ouch.
"Koenma-sama! I, Takeshima Lydia formally place myself at your infinite mercy! I- Uh…I…Please don't eat me!" I begged; the ending thought up on the spot as I'd forgotten the exact wording Yusuke had used.
I lay there for a moment, barely breathing, hoping against hope that this supernatural being would rather have a chunk of celery rather than a skinny runt like myself. The silence seemed to stretch…
That's when I heard it.
Was someone laughing? Who was it?! I lifted my head from it's position on the floor, and peered cautiously over my shoulder. My eyes narrowed immediately. Yusuke and Kuwabara were on the floor in near hysterics, Hiei was smirking that annoying smirk of his and Kurama was coughing harshly into his fist, tears apparent in the corners of his eyes. The only one who seemed to be dumbfounded was Botan, and she stood there with her mouth wide open.
"What's so funny?" I queried sweetly, heat scalding my cheeks from mild embarrassment, rising to my feet and dusting off the area of the kimono where I had knelt. I had the distinct and unsettling feeling that I had been taken for a ride.
No answer.
"…What on earth did you tell her?"
The voice came from behind me. I turned around instinctively and came face to face with a baby. My eyes almost popped out of my skull, my face going from flushed to pale in a matter of seconds. The child, not knowing exactly what to do in this kind of situation leant in closer with an eyebrow raised.
"Uh…Boo?"
I fainted.
It had been nearly an hour since I'd recovered from my swoon. I was seated on Koenma's table, between Hiei and a stack of newly stamped files- Kurama, Yusuke and Kuwabara were on a couch that had suddenly appeared while I was unconscious, and Botan was floating mid-air on her oar. I pretended that this wasn't in the least bit unusual.
"Keymaster, eh?" Koenma queried after a moment of silence. He glanced at me, his brow furrowed. "Yes, I've heard something along those lines recently, but to be terribly honest, we don't have much information on it."
My shoulders visibly wilted, and I released a sigh. Hiei nudged me lightly, and I quickly straightened my posture, my legs swinging back and forth at the edge of the desk.
"So, what information have you accumulated so far?" Kurama asked, "We need as much as possible to keep Lydia-san from harm."
The others nodded in agreement, and I could feel the barely concealed energy rolling off of Hiei in waves. I looked at him, but he was wearing that blank mask again. Sigh.
"Well, Hiei was told that the requirements for a 'Keymaster' is for a ningen to be infected with Yokai blood." Koenma stated.
"Hai…But, I haven't been bitten by anything resembling a demon. Not even recently." I added.
Koenma grunted, digesting this newest update.
"Koenma-sama! I've found it! Koenma-sama!"
A loud voice broke into our thoughts, and my eyes shot to the blue ogre bounding through the double doors with a video tape in his hand. My gaze dropped to his…Uhm…Lower regions, and my eyebrows rose distinctly.
"Is...He wearing a leopard print loin cloth?" I asked incredulously. Hiei coughed into his hand, and surreptitiously blocked my vision.
"What is it Jorge?" Koenma snapped, his left eye twitching with annoyance.
'Jorge' came to a screeching stop aside of his mini ruler, his hand outstretched with the tape clutched firmly in his grasp; "Koenma-sama! You sent me to find evidence of when this girl was infected, and I found the exact moment! Look!"
The toddler's face broke out into an excited grin, and he bounded behind the desk and sat in his imposing chair, his fingers steepled beneath his naturally chubby chin. When Jorge made no move to do anything, he frowned again.
"What are you waiting for, baka?! Put the tape in the cassette player!" he fairly howled, and I cringed, shifting as close to Hiei as humanly possible. He shot me a warning glare, but remained silent.
Jorge 'eeped' and pranced over to the cassette player beneath the plasma TV (Where the hell did he get one of those? I'm so jealous!), and took a small step back.
The screen went fuzzy for a moment, and then my six year old face chubby with youth and framed with a riot of dark curls suddenly took up the entire space.
"Lydia! Don't wander off!"
Ah, that would be my mother's voice. My younger self glared over her shoulder at the elder woman and huffed in annoyance.
"Hai mama! I'm jus goin ta look at the pretty flowers!" she called out before continuing on.
The camera followed her progression across the field she was currently in, pausing when she stopped at the small pond- Her greedy hands plucking at the flora that resided there. After a few moments, her hand slapped over the side of her neck and she frowned in discomfort.
"Owie…Mama, a bug bited me!" she howled.
The picture paused there.
"Why'd we stop it there?" Yusuke asked, staring at the screen.
Jorge sighed and rolled it back a couple of frames to where I'd just sat down.
"Watch this part carefully…" he stated, taking the tape off pause.
We all watched the scene replay itself out, and the blue ogre paused it a frame earlier than before. The spot on 'my' neck was zoomed in on, 'my' hand had been removed fractionally, and beneath it was…
"Ew! What the hell is that?" I yelled in disgust, cringing away from the image.
Koenma's pacifier fell out with a soft pop! His face round with wonder.
"Isn't that a Makaichu?"
"What the hell is a Makaichu? It looks gross!"
Hiei folded his arms across his chest, and glanced at me. "A Makaichu is an insect from Makai that feeds on the Reiki of a Ningen."
"Damn! I thought we'd seen the last of them when were fightin Sensui…" Yusuke whistled, his eyes wide.
"So that's how she got infected with Yokai blood. It makes more sense now." Koenma mused, wringing his hands. "Father's going to kill me this time."
I was so confused. I'd been bitten by some gross insect when I was younger, and now I was infected with something…That was going to get Koenma in a shitload of trouble with his father? My head spun.
"Alright, so if that's the truth of it…Why didn't anyone come for her when she was at her most vulnerable?" Kurama voiced the question in my head, and obviously in Hiei's from the looks of things.
Koenma had to think for a moment. "Lydia, have you started your menstruation cycle?"
I went a hideous shade of red at the question. "What the hell kinda thing is that to ask a girl?!" I yelled, shaking my fist at the toddler.
"Hn. Answer the question, onna."
"No!"
"Do it."
"It's my private business!"
"Onna…"
The threatening look he shot my way had me cowering, and I muttered it quickly. "…Last week."
"And was that your first?"
Enough with the damn questions already! I fidgeted, and nodded.
"Wow, you're a late bloomer!"
"Urameshi!"
The sound of fist connecting to flesh resounded around the room, and I turned away with a hand pressed tightly to my heated face. Gods this was embarrassing!
"Yes, well she's matured into a woman now- That is usually all it takes for a reaction of this sort to take place!" Koenma sounded slightly doubtful, and I turned a filthy look on him from between my fingers.
"…You're not entirely sure, are you?" My anger was felt.
"Well…That's the only plausible explanation!" Koenma blustered, his cheeks reddening slightly.
I growled and hopped off of the table, pausing to smooth the wrinkles out of my borrowed kimono.
"So, what now?"
"You guys just have to keep a close eye on her at all times. Who knows what'll happen from here on in. Hiei and Lydia have already been warned about the difficulties she might face later on. We can't afford to have her kidnapped!"
"…Other than the problem of my safety…Why shouldn't I be kidnapped?"
"Because if you are indeed the Keymaster, they'll use you to open a door between Makai and Ningenkai which means many Ningens will be devoured and tortured…Which means all out war between Reikai and Makai…Which will ultimately lead to…MANY SPANKINGS!"
I sweatdropped. So all this really boiled down to him getting a raw butt. Wonderful. A hand tugged sharply at my upper arm, and I was forced to move backwards, albeit awkwardly. I looked behind me and caught the sharp look Hiei sent me, and I followed complacently. No need to rile him up.
"Hn. There's no need to worry, I will personally keep an eye on the onna."
We were out of the door and halfway down the corridor before I heard the spluttered protests from the Reikai Prince. Kurama and the others all filed out after us, and followed.
I sighed deeply. What the hell had I gotten myself into this time?
Spirit: Sorry for the long wait! I had writer's block (again!) But I think I'm over it now. Thanks to all those who reviewed the last chapter! Don't forget constructive criticism is appreciated, and complimentary reviews even more so!