8. Clarity.
T: Thankfully I've managed to rustle up time enough to post today rather than tomorrow! (Go me!) Another cliff hanger ending (forgive me!) but apart from this warnings remain the same. I do not own the boys though I desperately wished that I did!
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"What do you recall of the night we fought?"
"Can we not talk of something else?" He enquires as he turns his head a little from her. Summoning her courage she settles onto the bed and, tilting his head back towards her, she says,
"It is important that I know, ototo."
"You tried to stop the fight, tried to reason me into taking a breather…I was so angry, however, and I didn't want to be reasoned with...you kept trying to calm me and I kept retaliating with my anger…then…then I struck you…" He pails then and, for a moment, she believes that he shall say no more, then, his hands fisting into the edges of the duvet, he says, "I tried so desperately to make everything okay, to use the demon blood within me to some advantage and when that did not work I ran from the house…I wanted to be free of the memories tied into that place, wanted to forget everything other than the terrible crime that I had committed.
"Eventually I ended up in the 'care' of Shouhei-sensei where I existed in misery until I was eventually successful in killing myself and applied for a position as a Shinigami in penance for what I had done."
This is more than she had asked for, more than she knows he had thought to tell her, this additional information something that is due more to grief than anything else.
"You listen to my reasoning that night, ototo, allowed us both a chance to gather our heads…"
"Yet if that is the case…"
"You did not kill me, ototo."
"Yet it seemed so very real."
"As did your other 'visions'."
"Sometimes when I was lying in the clinic I'd hear your voice telling me that you were not dead, that everything would be alright…I thought that it was the madness and yet…" He trails and his eyes fill with such misery that she feels all but compelled to hug him.
He cries once he is nestled against her shoulder, his tears hot, wild, things that seem almost never ending. She allows him this childishness, comforting him as best she can with the simple fact of her presence and with softly whispered words of love, kindness and empty nothings.
Eventually the tears cease and, his face again schooled into an adult calm, he pulls a little from her.
"After I left, neesan, what happened?"
"I chased you for house that night and, when I could not catch you, I returned home and tried to search you out in another manner. For years I searched without any true direction, wishing only to find you and to make you see how wrong you had been, then I met Senichi and my search was given direction and purpose beyond the need to see you again.
"Eventually Senichi and I fell in love and the joy of our marriage, of the birth of our son, eased a little of my grief. I could never quite let you go, however, something that my husband could not comprehend of the longest of times and that he eventually recognises as part of who I was…part of my own, personal, madness. He helped me once he came to that realisation, taught me large chunks of his own knowledge so that, should I ever find you, I could help you through the insanity…could give you a 'better life'."
"I do not deserve such a thing."
"Why do you say that?"
"Because I have killed people."
"I did not think that the Shinigami actually killed, but rather that they aided in the release of an already departed spirit." He clearly has want to ask her how she has gained such exclusive knowledge, this desire, for the moment at least, over ridden by the guilt he feels still for his profession and thus he enquires,
"Do you believe there is a difference between the two?"
"Yes and yet if you do not then perhaps it is time to let the job go, time that you join me in the next life."
"I can not do that."
"Is that because you have a reason to stay here, one beyond the need to cleanse yourself of your guilt?"
"Yes." He is smiling now, the thing fragile and yet so pure that she thinks it the most handsome thing she has ever seen. "Will you introduce me to your son?"
"Of course."
…………………………………………………………………………..
He wakes to the intense burning sensation of the curse and to the sinking realisation that he has, again, played directly into Muraki's hands.
"Welcome back, bouya."
"Where is Asato-san?" He feels the others amusement for the semi intimate form of address and, a moment later, the man himself is before him, a genial smile fixed onto his lips.
"I would be more concerned for your own welfare."
"You can not hurt me." The other's smile deepens and he strikes him hard about the cheek. The blow is enough that his mouth fills with the taste of his blood and when, after a moment, this flavour does not recede, he enquires,
"What have you done?"
"After the intriguing display that I witnessed in the fire it became clear to me that it was very possible for one of the Shinigami to die, a probability that I research thoroughly while I was recovering from the 'aftermath' of that incident."
"You have learned how to injure or indeed kill one of my kind?"
"Correct."
His skin crawls for the knowledge that Muraki has yet another advantage over him, though whether this is for fear or anger he can not quite be certain.
"Now that you understand your position, bouya, I believe we should continue with proceedings." He moves, a moment, from Hisoka's life of sight, his amusement twisting itself about Hisoka's heart and tainting him with its poison.
He returns with Asato-san, the arm looped, casually about the other's neck as the only visual sign of restraint.
"So you see, Myagi-san, he is very much alive."
"Did he hurt you, Kurosaki-san?" By the strength of the other's concern it is clear that he knows also of Muraki's new power and, gesturing to his cheek, he replies,
"I'll live…figuratively speaking, of course."
"What do you want from us, Muraki?" Asato-san enquires,
"There is an individual that I wish you to resurrect for me, Myagi-san."
"I have neither the power of the want to perform such a task."
"I thought that might be your response." Muraki strikes Hisoka again, this blow softer than the last yet still enough to redden the other's skin.
"For each refusal the boy shall suffer."
"I tell you honestly that I can not do what you ask for me and that you may punish me for that fact…"
"You are about to make a bargain, your life for his, a gallant yet pointless sacrifice. The child is leverage and thus I shall not lease him." The dark malice that hangs about the other deepens and, leaning towards Asato-san, he says, "As to the other matter…deep within you lies an untapped power, one that I am assured will be more than suitable for the job."
"How can you know of this strength when I do not, when you have met me only once before this day?"
"He learned of it by following me into Tsuzuki's heart." Muraki turns to regard him a moment, almost as one regarding a rat or unwanted pest and then he says,
"I had intended to convince Tsuzuki-san that I was part of his life and to twist his reality to suit my purpose. However, the attachment he had to the illusion within his heart was strong enough that I could not break him away from it and it seemed that I would have to again 'step away from the fight' when Tsuzuki-san said…
"If you hurt me then tousan will hurt you in return." The threat, childish though it is, clearly holds weight with the boy and, curious, he enquires,
"Will you tell me of your tousan, of the power he holds and of how I might find him?"
"No."
"If you tell me what I want then I shall step away from your life forever." The child looks uncertain a moment and then he says,
"I thought that he was dead but then I overheard neesan talking to Kana-san, that's our next door neighbour, about him…she was saying that tousan was protecting us and that he'd made sure that no one would ever hurt me…"
"Is this all you know?" Again a moment of hesitation and then the child says,
"I can take you to where he used to live."
"So you learned of my grandfather, of his Onmyjitsu, I do not understand how that knowledge has led you to believe me 'gifted'."
"Then allow me to enlighten you."
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T: There is only one, maybe two, more chapter/s to go and then we're done! Next one late Tuesday!