I do not own any of the characters from The Phantom of the Opera, although I do rather enjoy borrowing them from time to time. I also have no claim on Queer Eye For The Straight Guy; I certainly hope that all will take this parody with the humor in which it was intended.
A/N Hey everyone, hope everyone had a nice New Year's. Is everyone sticking to their resolution(s)? I haven't cheated on my diet…yet…oops, I wrote this a few days ago so I have to revise that statement, but I have lost three pounds! This was a fun chapter to write and I hope you enjoy.
Author – ToryD
Beta – Terpsichore314 (SuperBeta! She can leap horrible grammar in a single bound!)
The Science of Love
Chapter 8
Meg lay on the bed as she watched Christine apply the final touches to her makeup. "I wish you would have let me buy you the silver dress," Meg said in a slightly sulking manner.
Christine turned and faced her best friend with a smile gracing her freshly glossed lips. "Meg, it was just too expensive, and besides I can get more wear out of this dress," she said softly as she gently brushed a small wrinkle from the black velvet fitted dress.
Meg rolled off the bed in one fluid movement that attested to her years of ballet study. "I suppose you're right," Meg admitted grudgingly as she stood back to admire the elegant picture Christine presented. "You're going to knock Erik's socks off," she said with a knowing smile.
Christine turned to look at her reflection in the full-length mirror. "Do you think so?" she said in an unconvinced tone.
Shaking her head, Meg wondered how Erik and Christine would ever get through the night alone as each was so very nervous of the other's reactions. "Of course! Christine, in case you haven't already noticed, Erik is crazy about you," she said, reaching out and taking Christine's shoulders in her hands and peering into the mirror at their reflections.
With a happy sigh, Christine felt her spirits lift at the prospect of her evening ahead. "I guess I had better get downstairs," she said as she reached for the small black evening bag that Meg had so kindly let her borrow.
"Wait," Meg said as Christine started for the door. "Christine…umm…" Meg's voice trailed off uncertainly as she tried to find the words to convey her concern. "Erik hasn't really ever dated anyone," she said with an anxious expression in her blue eyes.
Christine, knowing what her friend was trying to say, smiled slightly as she crossed the room to stand directly in front of Meg. "I know, Meg, and please don't worry about Erik. I promise that I will not do anything to cause him any hurt or embarrassment."
Meg released the breath that she hadn't realized that she had been holding in a rush of air between her lips. With a grateful smile, she reached out and hugged Christine to her in an uncharacteristic show of emotion.
Christine returned her friend's hug, knowing that Meg was perhaps just as nervous as herself. "Come on then, I don't want to keep Erik waiting," she said as she pulled Meg along after her.
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Erik stood stone still as Marie adjusted the Windsor knot in his burgundy silk tie.
Marie took a step back and admired her handiwork. "There," she said with a satisfied smile as she brushed the shoulders of Erik's elegant suit jacket. "You look very handsome tonight, Erik."
Erik swallowed past the large lump in his throat as he regarded himself in the full-length mirror. The dark navy suit that Carson had insisted on did seem to enhance his physical attributes to their best potential. Perhaps he was looking somewhat handsome tonight, he thought as he admired the subtle spiking of his hair, as well as the carefully applied cover-up on the scarred side of his face.
"We had better get downstairs before Christine wonders what has become of you," Marie said, her subtle insistence snapping Erik out of his deer-in-the-headlights self-admiration.
"Oh God, where is Nadir!" he cried suddenly, as if he had just realized that his friend was missing.
"Erik," Marie said as she placed a gentle hand upon his arm. "He said he needed to run an errand and would return soon. Why did you need to see him before you leave?"
Erik shook himself and began to pace the room like a caged tiger while tapping at his forehead nervously. "Yes, he has something I need!" Erik said anxiously as he considered the disaster that would befall him if Nadir didn't arrive in the next few minutes.
Seeing that Erik was about to have a coronary, Marie reached for the phone to dial Nadir's cell. "Nadir," she said calmly into the phone, noting the sharp, desperate look she received from Erik. "Erik is waiting for you. When are you expecting to arrive?"
Nadir turned his Mercedes sharply onto the roadway leading to Erik's secluded mansion. "I'm pulling up to the house now; tell Erik that I have everything and will be there in three minutes," he said urgently and disconnected the call at the exact moment he abruptly braked the car to a screeching halt.
Marie frowned at the disconnected line as she replaced the phone's receiver. "He will be here in three minutes," she said as she watched Erik visibly relax before her confused eyes.
"Good," Erik said as he sank into a leather chair as though he needed a moment of rest to recover from some great, unknown ordeal. "Marie, would you please go downstairs and let Christine know that I will be only a few more minutes?"
Eyeing him warily, Marie made her way towards the door. "Yes, of course," she said as she opened the door and slowly exited the room with a disconcerted look.
Nadir rushed past Meg and Christine as he raced up the staircase at a breakneck speed.
"I wonder what has him in such a big rush." Meg said as she stared after Nadir's ascending form.
Marie stepped aside quickly to avoid Nadir as he rushed down the hallway towards Erik's suite.
Nadir gave a courtesy knock before he let himself into Erik's room.
"Did you get it?" Erik asked curtly as he jumped to his feet.
Pulling out a small black plastic box, Nadir gave Erik a conspiring smile. "We're all set."
Erik released a deep sigh of relief as he reached for the small box. "How does this work?" he asked, opening the box to reveal the state-of-the-art communication device.
"Here," Nadir said as he took the small flesh colored listening chip from the box to adhere it discreetly behind Erik's left ear. Taking the small microphone, Nadir carefully hid the small round metal device behind Erik's suit lapel. "Okay, now that you are set up let's test this baby out," he said as he withdrew his own transmitter and microphone. "I'll go down to the end of the hall."
Erik waited impatiently as Nadir made his hasty retreat. "Testing, testing," Nadir's voice came across clearly into Erik's ear. "Erik, if you can hear me please respond."
"I heard you Nadir, can you hear me?" Erik asked in a whispered tone hoping to test out the fullest range of the device.
"Loud and clear," Nadir responded as he headed back towards Erik's suite. Once he had entered the room he quickly informed Erik of the limitations of their secret communications device. "Okay, now there is a half mile reception area, so I will need to stay within that distance. Also, all of the controls are on my receiver so if you are having trouble hearing me just tap on the microphone twice and I will make some adjustments on the control. All right, I think that about does it; shall we go down?" he asked Erik, pocketing the small receiver.
Erik drew in a deep breath and squared his shoulders as he turned towards the door.
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Meg, seeing her mother descending the stairs, wondered if she knew what was keeping Erik. "Mom, is Erik on his way down?" she asked as Marie joined them.
"Yes, he will be here in a moment." Turning, she took in the vision of Christine. "My dear, you look absolutely beautiful," she said with an admiring smile.
"Thank you," Christine replied as she accepted Marie's kind compliment. "Is everything all right?" she asked in concern.
"Erik is very nervous, dear, but he is also looking forward to your evening," Marie said in a motherly tone. "Perhaps you will need to guide him a little this evening."
Marie was instantly relieved at Christine's nod of understanding. All of her concerns reassured for her dear Erik would be in good hands with Christine.
Meg, oblivious to the shared communications going on between her mother and Christine, continued to stare up the stairs. "Jeez! I hope it's not that goofy hairdo of his that's keeping him," she said in an exasperated tone, causing Christine to bite her lip to keep from laughing.
Marie gave her daughter an admonishing look. "Meg, I can assure you that Erik looks very handsome this evening, and the only thing that is keeping him is some urgent business that he needed to discuss with Nadir," Marie informed her with a slight edge to her voice.
Urgent business! Meg thought to herself with a suspicious look in her clear blue gaze. Something was definitely not right with this picture, her mind shrewdly warned her.
"Christine, I have a black velvet evening coat that would go beautifully with your dress; would you like to borrow it for the evening?" Marie asked softly.
Christine's face brightened at the idea of a matching coat for her dress. "If you're sure you wouldn't mind," Christine said, wanting nothing more than to look beautiful for Erik.
"Of course not; I rarely get the occasion to wear it, so it would please me to see you take it out for an evening on the town," Marie said as she gave Christine's hand a gentle squeeze. "Meg, go to my room and get the black coat from my closet," she instructed her daughter.
"Mom, I don't want to miss Erik coming down," Meg whined as she continued to stare unblinkingly up the grand staircase.
"Margaretta Leigh Giry! Go this instant and get the coat!" Marie said in a firm tone that had Meg grudgingly heading towards her mother's rooms.
Christine watched as her friend headed off just as she heard Nadir and Erik coming from upstairs. Her breath literally left her body as she stared up at the handsome vision of her date.
Erik's eyes never left Christine as he slowly walked to stand just in front of her, his practiced words of greeting lost forever in the foggy recesses of his mind as her beauty entranced him.
Nadir, seeing that Erik was once again in a stupor over the mere sight of Christine, quickly headed in the direction of the dining room so that he could advise Erik on what to say. "Erik, tell her how beautiful she looks," he said urgently into the microphone that was attached to his lapel, totally oblivious to Meg who stood just behind him holding the coat her mother had asked her to fetch.
Erik shook himself slightly as he was pulled from his trance by Nadir's insistent words. "Christine, you look beautiful," he said in a worship-filled tone that conveyed his true appreciation of her beauty.
"Thank you," Christine said as she smiled up Erik. "May I return the compliment and say that you, dear sir, are very handsome this evening," she said, her patent truthfulness lifting Erik's heart.
Nadir relaxed, feeling as if his plan was succeeding beyond his wildest expectations. "Good, that was perfect. Now you need to help her on with her coat," he said into the mic coaxingly.
"He will need this first," Meg said smugly as she held up the black velvet coat tauntingly on one finger.
Nadir froze in horror at the sound of Meg's voice just behind him.
Erik tensed in fear as all color began to fade from his face as he heard Meg's teasing voice in his ear.
"Meg, I swear if you don't play along, I promise I will make your life a living hell!" Nadir threatened through his clenched teeth as he shot her a look of immense displeasure.
"Now Nadir, I'm sure I don't know what you're talking about," Meg said in a mockingly innocent tone.
"You'd better come and talk some sense into her, Erik," Nadir said into his small mic as he eyed Meg with barely concealed disgust.
Erik began to tap at his forehead nervously as he digested the ongoing conversation in his ear.
Christine and Marie frowned at the visible change in Erik. "Erik dear, are you all right?" Marie asked as she approached him with a concerned look.
"I'm fine, if you will excuse me for just a moment," Erik said as he rushed off in the direction of the dining room.
Marie and Christine stared after him in stunned silence, both women wondering what on earth could have caused such a strange reaction.
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Meg eagerly awaited Erik's arrival as she continued to stare mockingly up at Nadir. "So what are you plans for the evening?" she asked him with an impish grin.
"Meg…" Erik said in a slightly threatening tone, upon entering the dining room.
"Yes, Erik," Meg replied with an expectant look on her pert features.
Knowing from previous years of experience that she was not easily going to be placated, Erik began to bargain for her silence. "What do you want?" he asked, his firm voice defying her to continue with her game play.
"I want in on the action," Meg replied with an excited edge to her voice.
"NO!" Nadir answered sternly as he gave her a stern look of warning.
"Nadir is right, Meg; this is going to be difficult enough with just Nadir helping," Erik said as he regarded the stubborn set of Meg's chin.
"Well then, I guess I had better just go and give Christine her coat," she said with her sinister smile communicating the unspoken threat that weighed heavily in the air.
"Wait," Nadir said, halting Meg in her tracks. "You can come, but you are only to listen! I am still the one in control," he said, looking down menacingly at her.
"Sure," Meg responded, but her eyes twinkled mischievously.
Erik looked down at the young woman whom he counted as his little sister. "Meg, this is important to me," he said, his pleading tone testifying to the magnitude of his feelings.
Meg's face took on a serious look as she regarded her sweet Erik. "I know; don't worry, Erik. I couldn't be happier for you and Christine." Giving him a quick hug, she set about putting him at ease. "Let's get the show on the road; you don't want to keep Christine waiting any longer."
Erik gave Meg a tight squeeze, relieved that she was firmly in his corner.
Taking the coat from Meg, Erik strode through the door and made his way back towards Christine followed closely by Meg and Nadir.
"I'm sorry for the delay, if you're ready?" he said as he held the elegant coat out for Christine.
"Thank you," Christine replied politely, allowing Erik to wrap her in the luxurious coat.
Marie retrieved Erik's charcoal wool overcoat and held it out for him. "I hope you both enjoy the ballet," she said as she walked with them to the front foyer where James stood waiting patiently.
"Mr. Korvin, Ms. Daae," he greeted them with a slight nod of his head as he opened the door for them.
Erik gestured for Christine to precede him as they left the house.
Shivering as the December wind greeted her, Christine smiled at Erik. "I guess living in California all these years hasn't prepared me for such cold weather."
Nadir quickly darted out of Marie's vision as he listened intently to Erik and Christine's conversation. "Open the car door for her," Nadir instructed as he felt Meg come up behind him like an annoying gnat.
"Isn't that James's job?" Meg said sarcastically, which earned her a dark look from Nadir.
"I will give you a minute to get down the drive before I start to follow," Nadir said and walked back towards the kitchen to retrieve the coat he had hastily thrown on the chair.
"Wait, where are we going?" Meg asked as she followed Nadir.
"The receiver only has a half-mile radius so we need to stay within that distance so that we can stay connected to Erik," Nadir explained as he listened while Erik helped Christine into the back of the Bentley.
"I'll be right back, I need my coat," Meg said over her shoulder as she ran for the foyer closet.
Nadir rolled his eyes as he pictured the rest of his evening in Meg's company.
"The drive should take us about forty minutes," James said as held Erik's door open.
"Thank you, James," Erik said as he slid in beside Christine. "Are your hands cold?" Erik asked as he watched Christine rub her hands together.
"Just a little," Christine admitted, wrinkling her nose slightly, which Erik found irresistible.
"Erik, take her hands in yours to warm them," Nadir called out as he pictured the opportunity for Erik to initiate contact.
"What'd I miss?" Meg asked as she re-joined Nadir in the kitchen.
"We're going to miss everything if you don't get that cute butt of yours in the car!" Nadir said with a stern look.
Mumbling under her breath, Meg preceded Nadir out the back door.
"Here," Erik said as he took Christine's cold hands in his gently rubbing them back to warmth.
Christine was surprised that shy Erik was actually holding her hands, even if it was just to warm them. "Thank you," she said as she slid closer on the seat towards Erik.
Erik felt as if the temperature in the car had rose seventy degrees as he reacted to Christine's nearness. "Uhh…your hair looks nice with the curls, you can't tell the unevenness that way," Erik said in a slightly stuttering voice.
"Erik!" Nadir yelled into the mic. "You just insulted her hair again!"
"What did he say?" Meg cried as she buckled her seatbelt.
"Thank you," Christine responded with a forgiving smile.
Erik, seeing that James had left some champagne on ice, thought he should offer Christine a drink. "Would you like some champagne?
"I normally don't drink, but since this is such a special night, why not," Christine relented, and saw a sigh of relief escape Erik's lips.
"Good work, Erik," Nadir said as he pulled out onto the main roadway.
"I want to listen!" Meg said in a slightly childish manner.
"Look in the glove compartment; I may have a speaker wire that we can use to plug into the car's stereo system," Nadir said as he glared at his unwelcome companion.
Meg began to rummage through the compartment and smiled as she spied a box of condoms. Holding them up she eyed her grouchy friend. "Magnum sized, Nadir?" she said with a glint of mirth in her blue eyes.
Nadir reddened instantly and snatched the box away from her. "Just look for the wire," he said through his tightly clenched teeth.
Meg laughed softly to herself as she continued to rummage through the messy compartment. "Is this it?" she asked as she held up a long thin wire.
"Yes, let me have it." After a few quick connections, the car speakers came to life with the sound of Erik and Christine's date.
"I think there are some glasses in that cabinet," Erik said to Christine as he lifted the chilled bottle from the silver vat.
"Here they are," Christine said as she held up two tapered crystal champagne flutes.
"This is a good opportunity to show off your man skills," Nadir said.
"Man skills?" Meg said with one eyebrow raised in disdain as she looked at Nadir.
"Yes, Meg, everyone knows that men are superior at uncorking champagne," Nadir informed her, his superior tone setting her teeth on edge.
Erik felt all man as he applied pressure to the bulbous cork, knowing that Christine was watching his actions with rapt fascination. A loud popping sound was followed closely by a sharp ping and finally by a sharp groan of pain.
"Fuck!" Erik yelled out as the champagne cork struck his left eye.
"Erik!" Three voices cried out in unison.
"Oh Erik," Christine said, reaching for the white napkin that the champagne had been wrapped in and applied pressure to the bleeding cut above Erik's eye.
"Erik, what the hell happened?" Meg said into Nadir's lapel as she stretched across the steering wheel, causing the car to swerve dangerously on the road.
"Erik, it's bleeding quite heavily, I think you will need stitches," Christine said in concern as she watched the white napkin turn red with Erik's blood.
"Christine, I'm sorry," Erik said as he looked at her worried features with his good eye. "I wanted this to be a perfect evening and now I've gone and screwed it all up."
Meg felt tears fill her eyes at the disappointment clearly discernible in Erik's voice.
Christine, seeing that Erik's main concern was for their interrupted date, lifted her hand and caressed his cheek. With a tender look, she leaned down and took his lips in a soft gentle kiss.
Erik watched in fascination as Christine released his lips, wondering how he had gotten so lucky to have Christine in his life.
"There will be other nights, Erik, but for now I think we should get you to the emergency room," Christine said and applied ice to apply to Erik's swelling eye.
Erik pushed a button on his console to alert James to their change of destination, wondering if he would ever be able to be the man Christine deserved.
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A/N I hope that wasn't too confusing to read, going back and forth between Meg/Nadir and Christine/Erik. Let me know what you think. Next up Christine and Erik in the emergency room.
