THE DAY I KILL THE PRESIDENT
BY JAY ALLEN/HORROS
CHAPTER FOUR FIND THE PRESIDENT
I jumped out of the warehouse window and hit the ground.
Horros: ok maybe I should change that, rewind.
I jumped out of the warehouse window into a pit of hungry tigers.
Horros: ok time to get it right.
I jumped out the window and landed on a hooker.
Horros: ah close enough.
I got off her and gave her and gave her ten bucks. Now where the hell would I be able to find the president, first I checked chucky cheese. He wasn't there so the only place he could be is the blue house of fun. There he was in the baby's ball pit licking a lollipop. I said to the president
U cant blow up the world cause the world the world means something to every one, the world is a good place with sunshine lollipops and rainbows and anything when where together. But but its also full of jungles and fun and games now listen to me and hear my roar don't be mean don't blow it up
"nice weather today"
"what the"
"aaaw look at the little baby where's your mummy?"
"She's at hooters why u asks…waiting a sec you're no president2
"politics"
"Tony Blair or bush"
"why bush of course"
I pick up a chair and start to smash him to death. Sparks fly everywhere, he was a robot.
Horros: crap why dose he have to be a robot, come on. Ah well what you can do
So if that's wasn't the president then who is, the only way to find him is if I go to see the wizard of OZ. as I drew closer to the emerald palace I enter a little town with creepy midget perverts. They told me to follow the homosexual yellow brick road, and then a giant fucking house fell on me and those little freaks didn't even help. I help my self up and for some reason some little fuck stole my ruby shoes.
Horros: Dam I bought them off of God….crap.
God: in brass the darkness.
Horros: what the?
As I walked out of that place some scare crow stole my wallet, so I pounded that guy. Then found a tin man he said
"the oil the oil"
"what the"
I took his axe and walked away. Finally I met a lion, the bastard roared at me so I pushed him in the mud. At last I was at the Emerald palace. They told me to go away the wizard is not available today.
Horros: for god sake the cheek, I push over there lions beat up there scare crows and what do I get pssssssh.
I took the axe I had from earlier and smashed down the door. I barged my way into the wizard's room. He said to me.
"fuck off"
"no, I am looking for the president I need your help!"
"ok but you need to do one thing"
"what?"
"bring me the wicked witches broom stick!"