"Attack!"

The three small goblins summoned by Andrew were torn to shreds by the hail of bullets thundering through the air, but the fast moving projectiles only bounced off Buffy like so many rubber bands flung from the fingers of an annoying child. Or Xander.

Within seconds the mercenaries were all suitibly concussed and unconscious. The pointy toothed demon was taken care of by a well-timed grenade. Their quest could continue. They hurried down the corridor, knowing for sure now that all the baddies would be alerted to their presence.

Buffy broke the silence as they jogged. "How come we had a no-go with the fireball spell, Wills? You've been so good at fires recently."

"Ha, ha," grumbled Willow.

"Why couldn't we be fighting a home appliance?"

"Inner sanctum, 30 feet ahead," announced Andrew. After making sure the entrance was devoid of traps, Buffy kicked the door down and they barged in.

Surrounded by computers and weapons, Michael Ellis was an unassuming sight to behold. A moderately tall, thin man in a cheap suit, he wore a laughable toupee that belied his great power. Accompanying the arch-mage was a violent looking Polgara demon and a heavily muscled, heavily armed man.

The heavily armed man spoke up first. "Shall I open fire, call in my troops, or disembowel these intruders with my bare hands, sir," he said in a thick Scottish accent.

"If your troops were the heavily armed guys down the hall, they won't be coming," replied an obviously very smug Buffy. The mercenary leader's face fell into a scowl.

At last Ellis spoke. "Do not concern yourself with these miscreants, Jimmy," he addressed the man in a weasly, upper class twit-like voice. "I shall handle them, and then we can get back to our planning. Now my young friends, which would you prefer: fireballs, lightning bolts, suffocation, petrification, madness, freezing ice, burning acid, deadly poison, crushing weight, piercing needles, slashing blades, or being polymorphed into a squirrel?"

"What do you mean? An Eastern Gray Squirrel or a European Red Squirrel?" asked Andrew.

"What? I don't know that."

Willow rolled her eyes. "It doesn't matter what kind of squirrel it is. We've come to end your scheming once and for all."

"Once and for all? Isn't that a little clichéd?" asked Buffy.

"Shhhhhutup," whispered Willow. "Trying to be imposing here."

"Tyring to be imposing? You want imposing? Hey Ellis!" Buffy shouted. "I'm Buffy the Vampire Slayer. This is Willow Rosenburg, the witch who empowered the entire Slayer line and has the power to destroy the world. We're going to kick your ass."

"Ahem!"

"Oh, and that's Andrew. Despite that, we're going to still kick your ass."

Ellis was suitably impressed. "The Willow Rosenburg? I've looked forward to this for a long time. For too long my magic skills have gone untested. I've been challenged time and again by poseurs who thought they were better than they were, and who now reside on this earth as ash, rock, and the occasional squirrel. Oh, to face a true master of the arcane..." Ellis smiled. "I have a proposition. You, my dear, versus me, in a one-on-one magic battle. No interference from your friends. No interference from my guardians. If I win, then you may die, but I will disavow my plans and allow you, should you survive, and your friends to leave safely. If you win, then my forces will capitulate peacefully. What do you say?"

Willow never hesitated. "I accept your challenge."

"Don't do it Will, it could be a trap."

"It's okay Buffy. I know what I'm doing."

The two masters of the arcane faced off against each other in the centre of the cavern encircled by spectators, human and not. Andrew found himself next to Jimmy, the mercenary captain. "You sound just like Sean Connery," he squealed. "What do you think of Daniel Craig?"

Jimmy snarled. "I'll kill the bastard." (Note: written before Casino Royale premiered and the subsequent Daniel Craig love-fest from the critics).

Over in the 'arena' Ellis and Willow exchanged banter. "You know, I was not being entirely fair at the beginning of this contest," admitted the devious Ellis. "While you had been fighting your way through my compound I have been raising my own personal anti-magical defenses."

Willow smiled sweetly at him. "That's okay. They won't do you any good."

"So confident for such a sweet, young thing. I half wonder whether the tales of your exploits are authentic or just Watcher's Council propaganda."

"Awwww... the Council loves me. Tell you what: I'll be extra honorable and give you first shot. My treat."

Now it was Ellis' turn to smile. "You are too kind, m'lady. Prepare yourself." His features went stone-cold, and his eyes burned with hatred and fire. Behind them, Buffy fidgetted in nervous worry. The Polgara demon cleaned its ears out with its skewer, and Andrew and Jimmy continued to badmouth the sixth Bond.

From the walls of the cavern erupted great arcs of lightning, writhing around the bodies and equipment and plunging with unfathomable ferocity into Willow's small form. Blinding blue light twisted in bands around her body, the ground shook under the onslaught of violence and all viewers cringed with the tremors. Aside from her hair sticking up a bit from the static electricity, nothing much happened to Willow.

"Hey, that wasn't bad." She grinned. "My turn."

A visibly disheartened Michael Ellis steeled himself for Willow's countermagic. He closed his eyes and concentrated hard, feeling out with his mind for the first signs of her spellcasting.

Willow calmed herself. She brought into focus all of her extensive magical energies into an aura of purity, shimmering gold above her skin, ready to unleash all of her ability.

Then she kicked him in the nuts.

The threat was at an end.