Author's Note:
Once again, I apologize for the long wait...
Thank you to all that reviewed! I'm so glad you enjoyed "The Mortal and the Guardian". In this chapter, Selphie tells another story called, "The First Birthday". But don't get your hopes up, this story takes on the darker side of life and has no ending. I hope you don't get impatient with me, but these stories do have relevance to the plot. I think it's pretty obvious why without me explaining it… However, Rinoa will discover the true ending to "The First Birthday" later on. So if you don't mind, please don't skip it. Now, onto the story. Enjoy!
Chapter Four:
I had a best friend. That was certainly a big statement coming from me. I found it ironic that getting arrested and thrown into a tiny prison cell was what it would take for me to even have someone I could call a friend. But even if the circumstances were different, had I met Selphie outside these walls, I still believed we would have been friends anyway. She was just that kind of person.
Selphie was the one that approached me the day that I first came to D-District Prison. She didn't have to, but she did. She was extraordinarily cheerful and optimistic, always seeing the better things in life, no matter how hard it was to be locked up like this. I'd never met a person as strong as she was, and I'd always admire her for that. When all seemed hopeless, she was the light that kept me from crumbling into my own darkness. I didn't know how I would have survived being locked up like a caged animal if it weren't for her. And though I was ashamed of myself for being so weak, I was thankful of her for being my strength.
I never met anyone that was as thought provoking as Selphie. She certainly got me thinking about myself more than I ever got myself to think about me. It was probably her stories that worked my psychological mind the most. I never forgot her story about the Mortal and the Guardians and how our conversation about it deeply affected me. Was it too much to hope that love could find me someday? Was it wrong of me to protect myself from the possibility of heartache? How could it be that I desired something I so feared? I'd grown up witnessing all kinds of relationships being destroyed and sabotaged from all kinds of faces of human nature, and that life was something I didn't wish to be a part of, until now.
"We weren't meant to lose ourselves in the spoils of life," Selphie had said to me. It was the night she had told me the story of the Mortal and the Guardians, and she desperately wanted me to stop denying myself the idea of love. "There is no such thing as pleasure without pain and no such thing as pain without pleasure."
"That's not true," I had opposed. "There are plenty of things in the world that exist with just pain and just pleasure."
"Oh?" Selphie had said. "Name some."
She had caught me off guard yet again. "Well… how about laughing with your friends? That's a good thing. And crying because you're sad? That's a bad thing. But they're not both."
"You're happy because you're spending time with those dearest to you. But you're sad because you never want it to end," Selphie had explained. "You're sad because you're crying. But you're happy because crying gives you relief. You are one more tear closer to liberating yourself from the pain you felt, and one more cry from becoming stronger."
Maybe she was a know-it-all, but she did have a point. "So you're saying I should change my mind about love because even though I think it's bad, there could be some good in it?"
"What I'm saying," she had begun. "Is that you want to live your life without feeling anything. If you don't want to get hurt, then you can't expect yourself to be happy, because when you're happy, you don't want to lose that feeling. You fear that it will go away. Haven't you ever heard the saying of loving someone so much that it hurts? We're human, Rinoa, we have negative emotions too, and instead of ignoring them, you need to start feeling them when they happen. What's the point of being alive if you don't feel like you're alive? Leave the numbness to the dead; it's not your time for that."
I remembered that conversation well, and though I was still uncertain about the idea of welcoming love into my life, I never wanted what it took for me to finally change my mind to happen.
It was sometime late in the afternoon, and I was lying on my back facing upward at the sky. It was probably a beautiful day out, but the setting that surrounded me made it difficult for me to enjoy it. Though I didn't know exactly where D-District Prison was, I knew it had to be down south because the fall was mild.
"The wind's changing," I said. "I can feel it."
I expected Selphie to reply right away, but oddly enough, she didn't say a word. Maybe she was asleep. We hadn't spoken since the night before, and even then, she didn't have much to say. I might not be able to see her, but I could tell when something was bothering her.
After what seemed like an extremely long moment, she replied, "It feels like winter."
When I arrived, the season had just turned into fall. Had it really been that long since I'd been here?
"You know," Selphie began. "When the SeeDs first brought me here, that day felt just like this one."
"You have a good memory," I grinned.
Selphie gave a rather sarcastic laugh. "Nobody forgets the day they're brought here."
"Yeah, that's true."
"That's because I'm always right," Selphie added with pretend passiveness.
Whatever tension that had filled the air had cleared when we both broke out into laughter. But just as soon it was gone, it returned.
"Do you know the story about The First Birthday?" Selphie asked.
"Never heard of it."
I assumed it was going to be another sappy, romantic love story she'd concocted overnight, but it turned out that once again, I was wrong.
"There was once a village where a young couple lived. The husband was an incredible man who was always so kind and so gentle. His wife, on the other hand, was a selfish woman who did nothing but stayed home and took care of their beloved cottage. One day, the wife told her husband that she was pregnant. From that day forward, all was joyous in the house of the happiest couple in the village.
"However, that happiness was short-lived as they soon discovered the truth of their creation… that child was defective. It was born with what looked like two different faces fused as one. One side was the face of an adorable baby, while the other revealed the face of a monster. Although he was confused and a bit frightened at first, the father got over his moment of shock and gradually accepted his daughter into his arms. Though ugly she may be, she was still his little girl, and he would love her for the rest of his life. The same could not be said of her mother though. She spent many days and many nights weeping in her bed for creating such a hideous creature. She refused to hold the baby in her arms and nurture her daughter with her milk. She would not even look at her. This did not go unnoticed by her husband. He could not believe how cruel his wife could be and threatened to leave her if she would not accept their daughter. And so, though a lie it was, she did.
"Many years go by, and the daughter grew up in a home of a loving father, but a vindictive mother. It was a sad and unfortunate day when her father suddenly passed away from a mysterious illness, for he was the only person in the world who had ever truly loved her. And now, she only had her mother to turn to, but realized soon enough that despite being tied to her by blood, her mother certainly had no intentions of keeping her around. After wasting no time in finding another suitable husband, her mother remarried and sent her daughter away to live on her own. The daughter, with no other place to go, found herself wandering around the village without water to drink, food to eat, and not even a roof to put over her head. For the first time in her life, she was truly all alone.
"It was about a month later that the village healer found the girl collapsed in front of her clinic. She had taken her in and nursed her back to health. The healer offered her water to drink, food to eat, and a place to sleep if the girl would help her take care of patients who were sick children. The girl hesitantly agreed, for she feared that her hideous scar would frighten the children. Indeed it did at first, but in an attempt to calm them down, the girl began to tell a story. It was her gift of storytelling that allowed the children to love in her instead of fearing her for her deformity.
"From then on, the girl would tell the children many stories. Stories that were happy and stories that were sad. Stories about adventure and stories about love. For the first time in her life, someone other than her father accepted her for who she was and enjoyed her company. And it was wonderful while it lasted, but soon, it all changed when her ruthless mother had two more children of her own.
"One was a boy, and the other, a girl. Though both were born beautiful and healthy, they began to show symptoms of illness the older they became. Eventually, it was discovered that they had inherited a mild heart disease passed down from their father's bloodline. And so, their mother decided to put her children in the village healer's care. However, the mother refused to allow her children to be under the same roof as her daughter, so she told the healer that she was to fire her daughter. 'You are the best healer in the village,' her mother told her. 'And I always get the best. You will tend to my children, but only if you get rid of her.'
"The healer stood her ground and said, 'I have no desire of letting go of such a wonderful worker. The children love her, and so do I. I will not ask her to leave.' But the mother was quick on her toes and retorted, 'Very well. My children will die and I'll make sure everyone in the village knows how you refused to care for them.' The healer still did not budge and replied, 'And I'll make sure everyone in the village knows how you refused to be the mother to your first born child, and how you'd sacrifice your own children to get what you want. My sincerest apologies ma'am, but I am in the business of healing children, not using them as pawns. Your threats are not welcomed here, so if there's nothing more you'd like to discuss, you know where the door is.'
"And with whatever dignity she had left, the mother stormed out of the clinic. But she soon returned for a vengeful feat when she brought her rich and powerful husband to the healer and threatened to shut down the children's clinic if the healer was to disobey her orders. With so many children to look after, the healer hesitantly gave in to intimidation and agreed to fire the girl.
"Once again, the girl was left with nowhere to go and no one to turn to. After spending many days and many nights wandering the streets once more, the daughter became desperate and eventually decided to visit her mother at her new home. Upon her arrival, she met a house full of darkness with no signs of inhabitants to greet her at the door. 'They must be at the clinic,' the girl thought as her knocks went unanswered. She turned the knob, but found that it was locked. She knew it was wrong to enter one's home without permission, but she was so tired, cold, and hungry. 'Mother will understand,' she reasoned.
"After circling around the cottage, she found a window that was left open by just a crack and wasted no time in climbing her way in. She realized that she was in her mother's bedroom, for her portrait hung on the wall and framed pictures of her and her new family were found on every dresser in the room. The daughter then saw her reflection in the mirror on a vanity table. Her hair was a mess and her face was dirty. 'This won't do,' she thought as she sat down and tried to smooth down her hair. 'If mother comes home, I have to make a good impression. Maybe then, she'll let me stay.'
"In search of a brush to untangle her short locks of reddish auburn hair, she pulled out the drawer from the vanity table and found a book. 'What's this?' she pondered. Opening its covers, she recognized right away that the markings on the paper were none other than her mother's handwriting. 'Mother kept a diary?' she asked. Flipping through the pages, the daughter finally settled on one random page and began reading.
"The mother wrote, 'Oh, what cruelty! When we first wed, he was a man of position and stature, but now he settles for work that belittles his name. I cannot stand by such a man that is so worthless. How dare he insult me with such lowly ways? The embarrassment is unbearable, and as if humiliation's desire to ruin me is not enough, that man has made me bear such a hideous creature. What monster is she? No one will ever take her hand in marriage, and I will be a prisoner of looking after such a failure of a child for the rest of my life! I'd rather die than have to live in a house of peasants!' The daughter stopped reading. It wasn't that she couldn't. It was because her tears had drowned her mother's words into blurs of colors in her eyes. 'Father, is this what mother thought of us?' she asked, knowing that he wouldn't reply.
"Just then, the girl heard the door to the cottage open, and in came her mother and her husband. Not wanting to be found, the daughter took her mother's diary and fled out the way she came, through the window. She ran and ran until her legs gave out, and soon found a group of homeless wanderers huddled around a fire they made. 'Sir, may I sit by the fire?' she asked an old man. He grunted with a nod, but said nothing more. Sitting far from the others, the girl took out her mother's diary and began to read once more.
"The mother wrote, 'My, oh my! What joys have rushed through my ears today! The village leader has a nephew whose wife just passed away. May she rest in peace, but now she has made such a suitable husband into a lonely bachelor. He is my match, my equal. His arm is much more worthy than the one I now hold. If I marry him, I will be free of my punishment of having such a useless husband and a dreadful daughter. Oh, why must I be wed to such horrid luck? I must act quickly before the village whores trap him in their web. But what must I do? The village laws do not allow me to separate from my husband. The only way is… death.'
"The daughter gasped when she read the last line of that entry. 'She couldn't…' she whispered. 'She wouldn't…' But when she read on, she soon discovered just how capable her mother was of doing whatever it took to fulfill her wishes of living a dream. 'He is dead. What have I done? No, I cannot think like that. He was getting old and was spending his life doing insignificant work anyways. No one would miss him. And now that I am free of that man, I can pursue whomever I so please. And best yet, I can free myself from the burdens of caring for such an abominable child. All that's left is the village leader's nephew. And that certainly will not be a problem.'
"The daughter couldn't believe her eyes. 'Mother… she… she killed father?' she asked in disbelief. 'That selfish, greedy little whore! How could she? How could she do that to father? How could she do that to me? To us?' The girl stood up from the ground and flung the book into the fire, the fire that burned within her green-colored eyes. 'You took the one person I loved most from me. And for what? So you can go fuck the richest available son-of-a-bitch and have beautiful children with him and live such a wonderful life of luxury? You don't deserve it, you murderous whore!'
"The daughter was outraged and in her fury, she clawed into the fire and clasped her fingers around a thick branch, ignoring the burning pains in her hand. Lifting her torch, she made her way through the night into the village towards the children's clinic. When she arrived, she knew that her mother's children were inside, and wanted to throw the torch onto the roof of the cottage. 'Burn… burn!' she wanted to scream. 'Burn to hell where your mother belongs! She took what matter most to me, and now, I will do the same to her. Now burn!'
"But as she drew her arm back to throw the torch, she found that she couldn't. The healer was inside. The children were inside. Her siblings were inside. Though she wanted to kill her siblings, she knew it would be wrong. They had done nothing wrong to her, and she couldn't bring herself to do harm to innocent children, not even for revenge against her mother. And so, she let go of the torch as it fell to the ground beside her. Then suddenly, a loud roar reached her ears as she looked up and saw waves of flames engulf the children's clinic.
"The girl was stunned. 'What? But I didn't…' she said and looked down to see the torch lying still on the ground. 'But how…?' In all the madness, the healer had woken up in just the knick of time and quickly evacuated the children. Many of the villagers had also woken up and hurried over to put the fire out. The girl, however, just stood there, paralyzed from her crumbling sanity, and did not notice the prowlers that watched her from afar.
"They were soldiers who claimed to protect all the villages in the land. Sometimes, when someone in the village supposedly committed a crime, they were always the first to show up, and they would always take the suspect into their custody immediately, regardless of whether they were innocent or not. And yet somehow, after a short period of time passed, the suspects were released back to their villages on claims that they were indeed innocent of their crime. It was strange, but never questioned by the villagers, for they felt that if they were to challenge the soldiers, they wouldn't want to protect their village anymore.
"But the truth was… it was all a conspiracy. Most of the alleged suspects never committed the crimes, for they were set up by the soldiers themselves. They were not soldiers, for they were the criminals themselves. It was an underground business created by a merciless crime lord to take money from the rich and powerful. It was simple: the soldiers would set up an innocent person who could be used as leverage for those with money and power. The soldiers would then take the suspect into custody and inform their family that in order to release the suspect innocent of all charges, they must pay a ransom. Once the ransom was paid, the crime lord would use that as black mail against the family, so that no one could testify in the event of an investigation.
"The crime lord had set his sights on the village leader for quite some time. It was just his luck that the village leader had a nephew whose wife had three children, with the eldest being outcast by her own mother. He had sent the soldiers to watch her for any suspicious activity, and when opportunity presented itself, they set her up, just like they did the others. And now, she was taken into their custody, and so began the crime lord's sick game of adoption.
"The prisoner was like his newborn, and the family had until the prisoner's first birthday to bid on them. If they could bid on the prisoner at the right price, then they could adopt them. If they didn't, the crime lord would not keep them. Instead, he sent them away to be slaughtered. It didn't matter to him. He never placed value on human life, only on what their families had to offer.
"At first, when the mother was informed by the villagers that her daughter was responsible for the near death incident of her children, she was outraged. 'How dare she…' she began. But she stopped herself short when she realized that earlier that night, her diary had gone missing. 'No…she couldn't have…' the mother thought to herself, trembling. 'She knows. She knows! That's why she did this!'
"Before she could even begin to panic, the mother was secretly visited by the crime lord's soldiers who informed her of the deal they were willing to offer her in exchange for her daughter. 'If you give us what we want, we'll give you what you want,' they told her. 'I… I don't know,' she replied hesitantly. 'If you don't know now, then know later. She has a year to live. If you wish to save her, this is the only way,' they warned her before leaving her to decide the fate of her innocent daughter.
"When the mother's husband discovered what had happened to his children, he had nearly gone mad in anger. 'Your daughter,' he spat the word at his wife, 'almost cost us our children. My children. She could've killed them!' 'But what if she didn't do it?' she accidentally slipped. Her husband froze and carefully glared at his wife. 'What if she didn't?' he repeated. 'How would you know what she did or didn't do, huh?' his voice began to climb. 'Unless you know something about this!' Her husband grasped his hands tightly around her thin arms and shook her violently with every word he said, 'Answer me! What do you know about her? You know something! Tell me!'
"The mother was about to confess her recent encounter with the crime lord's soldiers, but realized that she couldn't. Telling him what she knew meant telling him everything. Her husband could be an arrogant bastard, but he was still morally inclined, and if he knew that she committed murder against her own husband just to manipulate her way to marrying him, he wouldn't hesitate to divorce her and take away their children. Or worst, she could be thrown into prison for the rest of her miserable life. And she would have neither. It was decided. She would never ever tell her husband the truth.
"The mother regained her composure with a bit more confidence, though it was tainted with uncertainty for she feared he would see through her lies. 'She is my daughter,' she reasoned in attempt to steer his attention to another issue. 'Would you immediately believe it if a stranger told you one of our children tried to commit murder?' Her husband replied, 'But some of the villagers witnessed her presence near the clinic. They saw a lit tree branch lying on the ground beside her for crying out loud! And where is she now? Gone! Disappeared! She's run away and do you know why she's run away? Because she's guilty! That's why!'
"The mother put on her mask. 'You're right,' she said quietly, nodding in agreement. 'She is no longer my daughter. I shouldn't let that cloud my judgment.' She slowly walked towards her husband and cupped his face in her hands. Looking deep into his eyes, she told him, 'Don't worry. I'll never allow that monster to hurt our children again. Ever.'
"Since she was concerned for none else than her own fate, the mother decided not to tell anyone of her encounter with the crime lord's soldiers. 'If they keep her locked up, my secret will never be discovered,' the mother thought. 'But she is my daughter, my flesh and blood, I cannot commit such a sin…' she tried to reason. 'No! I mustn't be weak! I have to act accordingly, for my future, for my family's future. This must be done,' she changed her mind.
"And because of her decision, her helpless daughter was taken by those men to a place where she was never heard from again."
And then, there was silence.
I felt my eyebrows furrow and my face fell into a frown. "Selphie?" I called out. She didn't respond immediately, so I assumed that she was too tired to continue and fell asleep.
But soon enough, I heard her voice faintly saying, "Yeah?"
I sighed in relief. I wouldn't have minded if Selphie wanted to wait until morning to finish telling her story, but I was beyond curious as to what happened next. "I'm still listening," I reassured her. But even so, she did not continue. "Isn't there more?"
"No," she simply said.
"Oh…" I whispered disappointedly. "I don't know. It just seems incomplete to me. I mean, did they ever find the daughter? Or did she spend the rest of her life in that place? And her family…" My voice drifted off as I tried to analyze the story's meaning.
Selphie had always been a hopeless romantic, yet this story was filled with the complete opposite. I didn't quite enjoy it as much as "The Mortal and the Guardian", but this story was different. And I couldn't help but feel oddly connected to it for some reason. Maybe it was how the girl was locked up for something she didn't do that sparked an interest in me. After all, I was in a similar predicament. But such a thing couldn't be true. No one could be so cruel as to use some game of adoption to get what they wanted. They just couldn't.
"There is more," Selphie brought up a short while later. "But it hasn't happened yet."
"What do you mean?"
Before she could reply, I suddenly heard the front gates of D-District Prison opening. I couldn't see what was going on outside, but I could hear a lot of commotion. The security guards were running around and loading their guns. There was some kind of truck driving into the prison. Some of the prisoners were screaming. And I could hear many doors to their cells slamming open. "What's going on?" I asked Selphie in a panic.
She didn't answer.
"Selphie? Selphie are you there?"
Instead of answering me, I heard her call out my name, "Rinoa?"
"Yes, Selphie? I'm here," I told her. "What's wrong, are you all right?"
"Before I go, I just wanted you to know that... I love you," Selphie said in a soft voice. "You're the best friend I've ever had and you've been like a sister to me."
"What?" I said confusedly. "What are you talking about? Where are you going?"
"Whatever happens, I don't want you to judge me," she continued. "Just know that I had a reason for doing what I did."
"Judge you for what?" I asked anxiously. "What did you do? Selphie, answer me!"
"I really hope someone adopts you soon," she said.
"Selphie, you're scaring me."
"And don't forget to get me a present."
Right when she said that, I heard her door slam open.
"Cause it's my first birthday."