January 26th

New candidates for 'most boring alien ever' award discovered: 2
Minutes spent missing Jack: At least 300
Number of times wished was still at home looking for lost boot: 569 (at last count)

Cannot believe how boring this planet is. Whole planet is full of aliens more boring than any lawyer. More boring, even, than Rodney Don't-Put-Me-Near-A-Lemon-Or-I'll-Die McKay. Which is saying something.

Also think that have managed to find the most boring aliens on the planet full of boring aliens. Ahem, Thacura. Having found mission report, feel that should at least try and show off some of the knowledge gained by reading it.

Daniel is talking to the... Thacurans, one supposes, they should be called. Teal'c is being stoic. Teal'c is always stoic. Am constantly shocked and amazed by Teal'c capacity for... stoicism. Haha. Invented a new word! Huzzah. Perhaps.

4.20pm - Cannot believe that am still here. Still. Daniel still talking. Teal'c still being stoic. Am still very, very bored. Beyond belief. Ah well, negotiations are supposed to end at five. Ish.

4.46pm - So near. Fourteen minutes. And counting.

4.54pm - Why does time run so much slower when am faced with Thacurans from planet dull?
4.55pm - Come on. Please. Five minutes.
4.56pm - Four minutes! Yes.

4.58pm - So close. Can almost taste the gate travel home.
4.59pm - No! Cannot believe it. Daniel has decided that negotiations cannot be finished in one day. Has suggested... horror of horrors... that we stay. Overnight.

Shudder.

6.47pm - Evening meal with Thacurans is even more boring than negotiations with Thacurans. Which is saying something. Cannot think of any more boring meal that have ever spent. Not even with ex-boyfriends.

Though, there was one time, at college-

No. Not even that. At least boring-ex-boyfriend could talk about something other than weather.

Seriously. Thacurans are obsessed with weather. Most boring Thacuran even interrupted another Thacuran who was talking about the weather, to comment on the temperature. Seriously. Cannot believe how boring Thacurans are.

7.57pm - Caught particularly bald and boring Thacuran looking at diary. Luckily, Thacuran's don't read English. No written language, according to Daniel. Luckily. Should really learn to keep diary safer. From now on, will keep diary on person at all times.

11.25pm - Have finally escaped from tales of weather-in-years-gone-by and got to bed. At least have fairly soft bed. Nice, for a change. Most planets have hard beds. Wooden, in some cases. With itchy, scratchy sheets.

Should be easy to sleep after fun day of boring alien weather-talk.

January 27th

4.12am - Do not understand what is going on. Woke up, no longer in bed. Am on much harder surface. Am not in bedroom. Am in small room. Dark. Can barely see diary to write.

WHERE AM I?!?

5.56am - Was just visited. Was horrid. Cannot believe it. Went like this.

"Colonel Carter." Horrid Thacuran-dull voice from other side of door.

"Yes?"

"Good. You are well." Hah. Sarcastic dull alien.

"No, I am not well! What on Earth is going on? What am I doing in here?" Was very unimpressed by said point.

"We are taking care of you. Until your Daniel Jackson agrees to our terms. We can demand whatever we want now. Your Daniel Jackson cannot refuse us now." Blackmail. Peachy. Just... peachy.

"You won't get away with this. My people. They'll come and get me!"

"They'll have to find you first. Good day, Colonel Carter."

"Wait! Come back here!" No answer. "Come back here now! I demand to speak to..." Damn. Cannot remember any names of any Thacurans who had dealt with yesterday. Damn them, and their stupid boring...boringness.

So, am now sitting in metal box room, with no forseeable way out. Ever.

Hate life.