Chapter Three: All the Way Up to Heaven

He said to only look up
He said to never look down
Down is where he came from
He said to hope for the best and take a load off my chest
Soon I could be happy
And go all the way up to heaven
And go all the way back home

Guster

…

"Elle, could you get that?" Meredith called from upstairs as a knock on the front door and a crying baby both demanded her attention. She knew that it was probably Cristina, who had volunteered to bring Hayden home since Aaron, her youngest son, went to the same preschool.

"Hi, Cristina," Elena greeted her parents' friend. And she knew that in less than a month, Aida wouldn't be the only baby in their "family" as she noted Cristina's huge stomach.

"Where's Meredith?" Cristina wondered, looking a bit preoccupied.

And a second later, Elena could see why. Gathered behind Cristina like a group of little ducklings were not only Hayden and Aaron, but also Sophie and Lydia.

"I'm right here," Meredith answered, coming downstairs with Aida in tow. "Okay… why did you bring home half the preschool?"

Ushering the group into the house, Cristina sighed. "I'll explain in a second, but I really have to go pee first."

Meredith looked at Elena, and the both burst into laughter. "All right, guys, let's go watch Beauty and the Beast," she suggested, then led the excited children into the living room.

"I love this kid and all, but it's time for her to come out. Apparently she's decided that my bladder is comfortable, and this whole maternity leave, soccer mom, fat chick thing is getting old," Cristina said bluntly as she dropped herself onto the sofa beside her friend.

Although they had all changed a bit over the years, some things were forever constant. "So is everything all right with Izzie and Alex? Why do you have the girls?"

"Yeah, everything's fine. She was out of town, and she got a flat. Alex had to go pick her up, so I have the girls until they get back," she explained nonchalantly.

"Izzie never goes out of town without the girls," Meredith remarked. "She's worse than I am about leaving her kids. I wonder what she was doing?"

Cristina shrugged. "Probably Christmas shopping or something; she was talking about it the other day. Seriously, I don't know how she doesn't go crazy with boredom."

Izzie had left the surgical program and Seattle Grace, realizing that medicine was not her calling; instead, she decided to go back to school and get her degree in psychology. She and Alex had married about three years ago, not to anyone's surprise. Izzie had worked as a children's grief counselor until the twins were born; she was now a stay-at-home mom, and they couldn't remember seeing her happier. However, what did surprise them was the path that Alex had taken with his own career; never in a million years would any of them have guessed that neonatology would become his choice.

"So, anyway, give that kid to me for a sec." Cristina smiled as she took Aida into her arms. "God, I hope I'm ready to do this again. I mean, the diapers and the no sleep and the fact that the parent-to-kid ratio is totally off now… This is way more intimidating than our residency ever was."

Meredith found it funny that a few years ago, Cristina never would have dreamt of admitting something like that. But she nodded in agreement; clinging to her newborn son for the first time and knowing that his life was her responsibility for the rest of hers was even more intense than holding scalpel could ever be. But looking at the now four-year-old, it was hard to believe that he had ever been so small and fragile. Meredith then looked over at Cristina who was watching Aaron play, and she knew that her friend was thinking exactly the same thing.

…

Derek and Burke stood in front of the OR board, examining it with arms folded. It was a good board, and they had both taken a just a few moments to admire it before each heading home.

"So, Addison arrives back in Seattle tonight," Preston remarked. When Derek gave him a questioning stare, he smiled knowingly and replied, "You aren't the only one she talks to, you know."

"I know that," Derek retorted, although he'd had absolutely no idea that Addison had spoken to Burke. He knew that it was more than likely regarding work, but it was strange nonetheless. But then he realized that his friends would become Addison's friends as well, so he'd better get used to it.

"I don't see you scheduled for any more surgeries today," Preston then said, hinting silently that it was time for Derek to finally go home.

However, with a smile, Derek replied, "You aren't, either."

"Which is why I'm leaving right now," he grinned and began to walk away, leaving Derek and the board alone for just a moment longer.

"Daddy!" Hayden practically flew to the front door, arms outstretched, when Derek arrived home about twenty minutes later. "We're making psghetti!"

Derek scooped his son into his arms and smiled as he walked toward the kitchen. "Mommy's cooking?" he wondered, making an exaggerated shocked face, at which Hayden burst into laughter. Even the four-year-old knew that his mother was somewhat less of an expert in the kitchen than she was in the OR.

"Hi, Daddy," Elena smiled sweetly as she sat near the stove, diligently stirring what Derek assumed to be spaghetti sauce. "Aida had a tummy ache and she was kind of freaking out, so Meredith took her outside because that calms her down," she reported as-a-matter-of-factly. "It's okay, though, because I've got the spaghetti under control."

"You're amazing, Elle," he said, walking over for a closer look. "Where did you learn how to do this? Because I know that your mom definitely can't cook, either."

"Mommy's friend Dr. Milo is married to a woman from Italy, and she taught me how one night when we went over for dinner. Taste this," she requested and held out a spoonful for him to sample. "Does that taste right to you?"

He had always known that his daughter was remarkable, but the dark-haired, green-eyed six-year-old always managed to astound him time and time again. Many had commented that despite her young age, she had an old soul; at times like this, he could see that it was true. "You've got a winner, kiddo," he assured her.

"I wanna try, too, Elle!" Hayden exclaimed, and she gladly gave her little brother a sample. "It's yummy," he seconded as he rubbed his stomach animatedly.

"It's almost done, so if somebody could go get Meredith, we can eat," Elena told them.

Derek put Hayden down and suggested, "Why don't you go get your mom, pal?" When it was just the two of them, he smiled and wondered, "How would you like to go on a ferryboat ride tonight? Just you and me?"

Her face lit up like it was Christmas morning. Or rather, like any other child's face would have upon seeing a multitude of gifts under the tree; Elena, however, found joy in memories rather than material things. Ferryboat rides just happened to be one of the things she loved most. "Seriously? Okay!"

"Then afterwards, I was thinking that we could surprise your mom at the airport. She isn't expecting us, but I bet she misses you like crazy." The truth was that he knew the little girl missed her mother, too, although she'd never say that to him.

"That sounds like a wonderful surprise," she agreed.

Meredith returned with Aida in her arms and Hayden following close behind. "Elena Amélie, you put my grilled cheese to shame."

Derek took the sleeping baby from his wife. "Okay, now it's Meredith time. I want you to sit down, enjoy your spaghetti, and go upstairs and take a long, hot relaxing bubble bath and just do nothing for the next two hours," he instructed.

"What's this all about?" she questioned. However, it wasn't unlike Derek to come home being a sweetheart; he was always doing or saying something wonderful.

"Well, I'm going to spend some quality time with the kids, and you get to go relax. Then Elena and I are going to the airport, and when I get back, you and I are going to spend some quality time together," he grinned playfully.

Elena smiled as she watched them. All of a sudden, she felt a little bit guilty upon finding herself wishing that she could have known her mother and father this way—married and happy. Of course, she loved Meredith very much, but a little part of her had always wondered what went wrong. She'd asked her mother once, but she'd only replied that sometimes people are much better as friends and that she would explain everything when Elena was older. However, she was pretty sure that she was old enough to understand; after all, a lot more had happened to her in six years than to some people in their entire lives.

"Elle, it's really good!" Hayden told her again, red sauce covering his face and the front of his shirt.

"Hayden… we've got to work on your etiquette," Meredith said, shaking her head as she stared at the mess her son was making.

But Derek just laughed it off. It seemed as though these days, nothing could get to him. Everything in his life was amazing; he had a wonderful wife, a job that he loved, and kids more remarkable than he ever could have asked for. Nothing could bring him down… Or so he thought.

…

Two hours later, Derek and Elena were standing on the top deck of a ferryboat; it would be at least another hour until Addison's flight arrived, and there hadn't even been the question of how they should spend the time.

"The city is so pretty at sunset," Elena remarked, completely captivated by the way the colors of the sky reflected off the maze of seemingly miniature buildings in the distance. "I wonder what it looks like from the other side of the sky."

"You should ask your mom when she gets here; I'm sure she's got a great view from the plane," he suggested.

Then, to his surprise, she wondered, "I wonder if Leni can see the sunset from Heaven? Do you think she can?"

When Elena was younger, most of her conversations involved Leni in some way; she wanted to see every photograph and to hear every detail of every story. However, as she got older, she didn't mention Leni as much; everyone just assumed that it was because the reality of the situation was becoming more real, and with that reality also came the pain of loss. And, in a way, they had been right; Elena did miss the mother she'd never gotten to know. However, the reason she didn't ask very much about Leni anymore is because it broke her heart to see the look in her parents' eyes because they could remember what they'd lost.

"I think so," he told her. "A sunset is one of the most beautiful things there is, so I think that everyone in Heaven gets to see them, too. I think that just maybe, sunsets are a little piece of Heaven that we get to see here on earth."

Elena nodded, never moving her eyes off of the multicolored sky. "Once I read a book about a girl who died and came back in another life as a dolphin because she loved the ocean so much. Do you believe in reincarnation?"

"You know, I've never really thought about it. Do you?"

She shrugged. "I don't know. But if it's real, in my next life, I want to come back as a bird so that I can fly through the clouds and up to Heaven whenever I want to." She then held out her arms and closed her eyes—a habit she'd practiced ever since watching that particular scene from Titanic. "C'mon, Daddy, you have to do it, too," she urged, looking up at him with her big green eyes.

When he was with Elena, he felt just like a child again… So happy and carefree. Leni had been able to make him feel that way, too. "Okay, Princess," he agreed and spread out his arms as well. And as the wind wrapped around them, causing their hair to dance around their faces, the rest of the world seemed to disappear. It was only them, the sunset above, and the dark blue water beneath them.