Disclaimer: I do not own D N Angel, only this story belongs to me.
True Love Has No Happy Ending
Chapter Three Of Needs and Wants
Part Two Dark
It was painful.
It hurt.
It hurts.
It still does.
The pain would never go away.
The pain.
The agony.
The anguish.
It was so very painful.
He had been suffering.
Suffering from that insistent throb in his heart for so very long.
It was since the day of his existence.
Since the day of his curse.
Cursed to be forever sealed in the Niwa family until…
Since the day Krad had been with the Hikari family and he with the Niwa family, they had suffered.
Not Krad.
Definitely not Krad.
The Hikari family and Niwa family, that line of descendants had suffered.
Who wouldn't be plagued with problems if they had another self in them sealed due to an unexpected incident? Who wouldn't suffer if they had another in them that would take over them when they blush or that thump in the heart came about?
He too had suffered.
Who wouldn't?
Who?
How could he not suffered when he has fallen in love time and time again, but had never receive their love back?
How could he not suffer when he knows he will never know the true meaning of being in love and being loved?
It was all because of that curse.
If only he had mocked her.
If only he had not said that.
If only. If only. If.
Maybe, if that incident didn't happen, he would have had a loving wife., a few kids maybe, and might have lived a long and happy life before he died.
He would have, if only.
He had learnt his lesson of course, but it was too late.
Now, he was destined to suffer, alongside with Krad, who too, had somehow been cursed along.
It was all his fault, as claimed by Krad.
Maybe it was.
He wouldn't know, after all, after he had received that blow from that person, he had already woken up in the Niwa family.
He did not know what had caused Krad to follow him to this place but he knew, it was all because of that person.
That person, and himself.
He had no one to blame actually, but himself.
Now, he had to suffer, to love but not to be loved.
To always love but not to be loved.
Always.
Forever.
For none would love him.
None.
His heart would shatter bit by bit with every love found and lost.
Breaking.
Splintering.
He thought his heart would never heal again.
Until she came…
Love has the power to make you, or break you.
He had loved her. As he would always fall in love with one.
She too had loved him.
He thought that he had finally knew what it was like to be loved, but it was all not meant to be, and his heart had been shattered cruelly.
Krad.
Krad had killed her.
And he knows, that she blames him for her death.
For till now, her dying words would always come to him.
You. It.. it's because of you. If.. If.. If only I had never met you…
If. If. If only.
The words rang always in his head.
Always reminding him of his curse.
Love comes silently, stays unforgettably, and leaves painfully.
He would always remember the look in her eyes.
The hatred she had felt towards him.
And her broken body as he held her.
The blood on his hands.
His fault.
If only I had never met you…
If only… If….
His counterpart would achieve happiness in the end, he made sure of that.
Made sure that his existence in them would not burden them, because it is always his fault.
No matter what he does, he cannot do it right, but he has to make it right for them. The Niwa family. It is his gratitude to them. For suffering with him.
They had suffered, but he must suffer forever.
Watching the ones he love with his counterpart after he awakens in their child would always break him further. It always does.
Time will not heal this wounds and I'm bleeding because of you.
Because the glimmer in the eyes of his beloved would never be his.
The smiles.
The laughs.
And that love.
He would always suffer.
As he must.
It is his retribution.
Then, he had fallen again.
Love has no season, no beginning or end. No rhyme or reason to the way the story ends. No way of knowing how a broken heart mends. Still, we keep falling, again and again.
With her.
She had only eyes for his counterpart. His other self, and that hurt.
That shattered his already broken heart into smaller pieces for him to pick up and resume his dreaded life, his cursed life.
He couldn't bear to look at her through his other's eyes. For then, he only sees her love shining through.
Not for him. Never for him.
With him, she had already hurt him deeply with her harsh words.
He knows she hates him, he knows…
He keeps on his façade.
He continues to see her through his other's eyes. For he loves her.
Loves her too damn much.
She reminds him of her.
The one that had loved him and died because of him, and yet she was her very own person.
And he falls for her more. His plungs down faster, he is lost deeper.
He falls.
He doesn't know why, but that connection, that bond between them was undeniable.
Only, she didn't acknowledge it.
He didn't too. He could only dream, could only wish, could only fantasize the day that they could actually be together.
Isn't it better to have loved and lost than to never loved at all?
But it was only a dream.
The curse could not be broken.
And even then, she hates him. That fact too, was undeniable.
He continues to see her smile, to hear her laughter, to feel her kiss.
All not for him, but for his other.
But he doesn't care.
I'm still here, waiting, to catch you if you fall. I don't know why I care so much when I shouldn't care at all.
To keep on with his dream, his wish, his hope, he had not stopped her from falling too deeply with his other although he knew that it would end badly.
For his counterpart did not love her.
He had not seen her like he did.
And he had did nothing to stop her end.
Then, she had broke.
His counterpart had hurt her so deeply, so badly, so thoroughly, that she had given up all hope.
He had tried to comfort her, his guilt so strong.
For he had witness every step that she took to the cliff of her downfall yet did nothing to stop due to his selfishness.
He tried to comfort her, and her broken words had held so much pain, so much hurt, that his own heart broke further.
She was just like him.
To love but never to be loved.
He couldn't bear to see her like this.
He couldn't bear to see her suffer like him.
For she deserved love.
And he had promised her, to protect her, he had sworn to himself that no one would hurt her anymore and that he would find someone to love her even more than he could.
No one would break her heart like this anymore.
Not even his other self. Even if they couldn't be together, he would fight for her happiness.
He promised her, and he would keep his promise.
No matter how much pain would come.
No matter if he suffers even more.
For this is the love he is ready to give.
To love but never to be loved.
He understands.
Love we cannot have is the one that lasts the longest, hurts the deepest, and feels the strongest.
He knows the curse would never be broken.
And because he knows that, he would strive for her happiness.
He would continue loving in the way he knows best, even if she would never love him. Even if she would continue to hate him.
But he will always love her, and he would always protect her.
And always, was longer than forever.
xxx
How was it? I thought it was like Part One. Crappy and too OOC.
Please tell me what you think cos I'm running out of ideas of what to write and it's getting really complicated.
I really should have left it as a one shot…
Sigh… Someone encourage me please!
Dying out of writers block here! It's practically expanding in my brain! Blocking out all major functions and my brain is beginning to explode…
Really.
Please… please review.
Flames are welcome.
Thanks for reading.
Yours truly, Nicolet
xxx