I promise I have been working! I have!

Disclaimer: Same as always

Chapter 17

It was infuriating trying to move his leg. It just would not respond. At this point, he wasn't even sure what muscle he needed to flex, just that he couldn't move it.

They said that he'd regain the ability to move it in due time, but since when had he ever been patient enough to wait for 'due time'? After all, waiting around was an invitation to his memories to come back. And come back they did.

Each one played in succession every time he closed his eyes. The same order as when he was unconscious, and always the same ones. The ones that were forever engraved in his mind.

He should have felt embarassed to be hobbling around on a crutch, but he didn't even care at this point. No one was around to see him. Beast Boy would have been inside tending to his arm, Jinx and Red X would have been helping Kid Flash build Cyborg, and Raven...would be...

Alright, so he was feeling a little guilty. No big deal. He could handle a little guilt, as long as it didn't come crashing down on him. He should just be glad that he could walk around now.

He stopped short of the park, afraid to go inside. It was Starfire's favorite place, and he had so many fond memories... No, he'd better just go on. The park wasn't destroyed, he had made sure of that. The park and the Tower.

Speaking of the Tower... His stomach lurched. Could he really bring himself to go and visit that old relic of his past? And what of the threats within? Yet something seemed to be drawing him towards the Tower anyway. Fate? Destiny? No, he'd never been a believer of that sort of thing. Maybe it was that strange soup Wintergreen kept trying to force down his throat.

He stared up at the cracked glass where the second hospital wing was. That would be where Beast Boy was, as he had been sure that Starfire's accomodations were much better. The best, really. So why was the light on in the other wing? Ah, perhaps Raven was there as well, that would explain it.

His hand went instinctively to his belt, and he had to fight the urge to pull out a grappling hook. No, he shouldn't try to visit the girls, that would only be disastrous for him both physically and emotionally. Besides, he definitely couldn't scale the wall in this condition.

That same force kept urging him forward. "Climb the wall, climb the wall. You need to see her again." He shook his head, mutterd aloud, "No, no, I couldn't handle that." His eyes widened as he realized that he had said it aloud. Was he really so insane as to start talking to himself?

He gazed up at that window. He knew exactly where it was. His other memories of how the Tower looked may have been old and untouched, but this one wouldn't ever leave him. Somehow it seemed different, or maybe that was because it no longer reminded him of his fear of hospitals. Yes, his fear. Slade's 'hospital' was worse than anything.

Then, all of a sudden, something glowed in that room. Whether it was the glow of a starbolt or not, he couldn't tell, but it made his heart jump. Was it really green? No, no, his eyes were just playing tricks on him. He needed to go lie down.

There it was again! And this time, he was certain of its color: green.

TTTTTT

"And you're sure that you can take care of yourself?" Raven asked one more time, though it was a strain to talk. She was fading fast, and she knew it. She'd have to get back to her own mind, and soon.

"Friend Raven, right now I am the more concerned for your well being. You have instructed me well on how to activate my own consciousness, and I believe I can definitely do the taking care of myself," Starfire replied, tears of gratitude still present in her eyes.

Raven looked to the tree that was hope. A large flower had grown in the center of it, where, according to Starfire, the personage of Hope was to be born. They had come so far, and now she was about to leave to salvage what was left of her mind. What a drastic change it would be! "Alright, well, just be sure that you don't try to break concentration too early, okay?"

Starfire hugged her; not one of those big bear-hugs, but a loving, gentle embrace. As she pulled away, she whispered, "I truly mean what I have said. You are my greatest friend."

Raven smiled, then closed her eyes in concentration. "Azarath... Metrion... Zinthos."

The image of Starfire's 'Nevermore' faded and eventually turned to black as she was pulled back into her own body. With a small grunt, she landed on the cracked ground of her own mind. She glanced around. Wow, there was a lot of work to be done. Yet even as she thought those things, she noticed that her mind was suddenly weighed down with terrible thoughts.

"Raven!"

She winced. Of all the voices to be calling her name, it had to be Intelligence, the bearer of bad news. "Yes, I'm back. And Starfire's strong enough to return to normal in a matter of minutes. Now we can get back to work here. I've been feeling so much joy lately that it can only help. And Love should get a kick out of this one; Starfire said that she wouldn't try to stop Robin from liking me anymore out of respect!" It didn't sound like her, she knew, but she wanted to activate as many emotions as possible before Intelligence weighed her down again.

"Raven, I have to tell you something..."

She shook her head. "No, I need to talk to the other emotions before anything else. We still have a chance to turn this place around, don't you see? Starfire was supposedly dead and we still managed it!" Her voice was almost pleading now. Whatever happened, she would not hear this bad news.

"I don't think there's much you can do to raise their spirits now," Intelligence replied sadly.

"Would you just call them together?"

Intelligence bit her lip. "We're going to have to meet over in the trees. Love and Little Love have been slowly fading away, and, believe it or not, Love's going to be the first one to go."

Those words hit her like a harsh gust of wind. "What happened?" She caught herself. "Never mind. I need to boost everyone's morale before-"

"Don't you get it Raven? Robin's DEAD! That's why Love's dying! He's DEAD!"

Someone had slapped her. Surely she was dreaming. Yes, this was a dream. She'd wake any minute now to find Starfire sitting beside her, happily patting the budding flower of Hope. "No," was all she could think to say.

Intelligence chewed on the bottom of her lip. "I'm sorry, but it needed to be said. If it's any consolation, your actions just then strengthened Love, Happiness, Hope, and even Little Love. So they're not going to die out just yet. You can still talk to them if you want to."

"And Beast Boy, is he-"

"No, he's the one that did it. I'm sorry Raven, I really am, but I had to tell you. It's my job."

"Who else is still alive?"

"Love, Little Love, Happiness, Hope, Sadness, Timid, and Anger."

"The others? Confusion? ...Bravery?"

Intelligence shook her head. "Bravery was the first to go, actually. You've missed a lot, Raven. And we missed you too."

"So...that's it? I'm never going to come out of this coma?"

"I wouldn't say never, but you'll be insane if you don't hurry," Intelligence replied, a sad smile present on her face.

Raven sunk to the ground, her hands running through her hair. "I knew it would be a change, coming from Star back over here, but..."

"You weren't expecting this much of a change, were you?"

She nodded, but tears wouldn't come. They couldn't. Finally, she looked up at Intelligence. "That's just it then, I'll never wake up."

In alarm, Intelligence asked, "What are you talking about?"

"There's nothing left," she sighed, "nothing left to live for."

"Raven, please think about this-"

"That's your job, and you've done quite enough of it, don't you think?" she snapped.

Intelligence hung her head. "I guess I may have."

TTTTTTT

Now Beast Boy understood the importance of being locked in a study. It gave you a sense of security. No one could see you there.

Of course, it didn't exactly feel right to be in the same room that your victim had once inhabited, but he wasn't about to leave, either.

"Come on, BB, I know you're in there! Unlock the door!"

He smiled. For once in his life, he was glad that Robin had installed such ingenious locks on this place. It kept intruders out nicely, and more importantly, kept him in. Besides, he liked it here. Everything was dark except for the computer screen.

His arm was in a cast, so it was harder to work, but he managed. He'd been writing obituaries. Though he was't a novelist or anything, it would suffice. The easiest to do was Robin's, as he didn't really care if it was well done or not. Starfire's was really difficult to do, as he had a hard time typing when he thought about all the great things she had done for him.

But Raven's was the hardest to do of them all. He hadn't even opened the folder yet to start. Every time he tried to start, the words seemed wrong. Nothing could describe her, and nothing would ever come close.

He didn't know why he was writing obituaries when they weren't even technically 'dead' yet, but it was something to do. He wasn't like Robin; he couldn't just obsess over Slade or some other villain. He had to find something less extreme to occupy his mind with.

"I'm not coming out!" he shouted back at Cyborg, who was the one pounding on the door this time.

"I don't care if Robin's left us or not, you're not supposed to be in there!"

"I can if I want to! Besides, what is he going to do about it?"

"Starfire's showing signs of waking up! It'll only be a matter of time before he comes back, and then he'll know that you were here!"

"What makes you so sure he's coming back?" The words were out of his mouth before he could stop them. And what scared him most was how...smug he sounded. So proud of what he had done. Well, he wasn't proud.

He knew now why Robin hardly ever slept. Once you'd done something regrettable, it haunted each night's dreams. Ever since his act of violence, he had refused to let his eyes close. He had once, but never would again. All he could see written on those eyelids was that hauntingly pale face and those eyes that widened behind the mask.

"What makes you so sure that he's not coming back?"

"If only you knew," he muttered under his breath. "If only."

Finally, after a long period of silence, the pounding stopped, and he could hear quiet voices outside the door. "He's not coming back," said Cyborg.

"Of course he's not coming out. The only time he ever comes out is to eat, and that was just once. And even then, did you see how pale he is? I can hardly even tell that he's supposed to be green!" That was Jinx. It had to be. It was the only feminine voice left to hear.

"Well, what did you expect? From what I could find, he and Robin had a fight of some kind. Don't you think something happened?" Red X scoffed. So the black-clad teen had been investigating, had he? And no body? Perhaps he hadn't done such a good job after all.

"Yeah, but it couldn't possibly be that bad. The only people I've ever known to lock themselves away are you and Robin, and that's just because you were insane. And maybe he was too, you could never tell." And that had to be Kid Flash, the only one who even remotely retained a sense of humor anymore.

He yawned, tired of listening to their conversation. He propped his feet up on the table, but slipped in his exhaustion and hit the mouse instead.

"Are you sure you want to open file X197?" the computer asked him.

Snooping. Well, it was better than staring at a screen and trying to force himself to write about the death of one he had loved. He clicked. "Sure, whatever."

To his surprise, a slide show popped up onto the screen. The first slide read: Teen Titans. Not surprising, he figured, as this was Robin's computer. The next slide did surprise him, however: "Best Friends and Good Teammates"

Robin's voice came over the slide show. "The Titans have been my teammates for a long time, but only recently have I really appreciated them as my friends."

Starfire came over the screen and waved energetically. He felt a twinge of sorrow at this, but grinned at her optimism. Then Cyborg smiled and waved as he threw a football at Robin, who caught it neatly. Raven waved unenthusiastically in the background. He then saw himelf trying to crowd the camera.

He could remember that, actually, and how angry Robin had been. Something about trying to capture the moment?

"Starfire is my closest friend, and she's not as nieve as she looks."

At first, the camera showed Starfire examining the camera as everything flashed in different colors, but that picture faded into Starfire fighting. She truly was a warrior at heart, wasn't she?

"And Raven has always been there for me, no matter how much she denies it."

Raven glared at the camera, then the image faded into that of the empath fighting. Again, Beast Boy was amazed at her grace. He had to bite his lip when he saw her grin casually at her victory.

"Cyborg's always been a lot of fun."

"BOO-YAH!" Several sonic cannon blasts faded to a running figure getting hit in the head by a football, then looking around angrily at whoever had thrown it.

"...and then there's Beast Boy."

"Here it comes," he muttered.

"Beast Boy may be a prankster, but he's got so much potential. He doesn't know how great he is on this team."

Then he saw himself change into a gorilla, which faded to him attacking the camera for a joke.

At first he just stared at the screen in shock. He checked the date: two days before the 'incident' that had changed everything. The slide show ended; he'd never finished it. His mouth opened to form a small 'o'.

"What have I done?"