CHAPTER FOUR: SULKING AND STARING

One week later, Artemis was dressed in black tuxedo complete with a bow tie and a scowl. His hair had been cut and styled by a professional hairdresser, and his shoes were so shiny he could see his reflection in them. He actually looked quite striking, scowl or no, but nobody at the manor was prepared to tell him that. Not while he had a look on his face that said, quite plainly 'talk to me and your head will be severed from your neck.'

Or something to that effect.

Artemis had tried every argument he could think of to get out of the dance. He had study to do, it wouldn't be safe, he needed to sleep, there would be drugs, alcohol…any number of different reasons why he shouldn't go. Angeline had remained firm. Only the argument about safety had gotten through to her, and she had dealt with that by arranging for Butler to chaperone. The bodyguard had been only too happy to agree to the proposition.

So at 7:30pm, Artemis could be seen climbing out of the black Bentley and walking through the doors of the Great Hall. The Hall had been decorated for the occasion, and small round tables and couches had been placed around the apparent boundaries of the dance floor. Artemis immediately found a table in a corner of the room and sat down. The expression on his face would have been sulky if he wasn't Artemis Fowl. Instead, it must be called peeved.

Within the first half an hour of the dance almost everyone had arrived. Most people came in couples – girls in long formal dresses and boys in tuxedos – but there were also a brave few who walked in alone. Most of them had partners within fifteen minutes of arriving. There was obviously a stigma attached to being alone at school dances, Artemis noted with vague interest. Not that that encouraged him to find his own date. He was already an outsider at school. Having a partner at this dance wasn't really going to change that. And in any case, secondary school politics were really below an intellect like his. At the end of the day, it was real life that mattered, and Artemis knew more about real life than any of the students at the dance.

The night began with traditional dances with music performed by a miniature string ensemble seated on the stage. Waltzes mostly. Artemis scowled through it all. He wished he had thought to bring his laptop. Although it was unlikely that Butler would have allowed it. The bodyguard had become quite insistent that Artemis be social. If it was anyone else the fifteen-year-old wouldn't have tolerated such brazen behaviour, but Butler had been a good employee and a good friend to Artemis. He was one of only four people that the boy respected, and the only one that was human. You can't fire a person like that.

Although perhaps he should reconsider, thought Artemis as Butler approached. His huge bulk blocked Artemis' view of the dance floor, and the look on his face would have scared a sloth into running. But not Artemis. Artemis didn't scare that easily.

'Look Artemis, are you going to dance, or are you going to sulk all night?' Butler had evidently been watching his young employer from some obscure corner of the room.

'I'll remain here until the dance is over, thankyou,' said Artemis firmly. 'And I do not sulk.'

Butler grinned. 'You're doing a pretty good impression then. Oh, and you've got another five and a half hours of sulking to go.'

Artemis was so astonished he didn't respond to the obvious jibe. All this boredom, and the dance had only been going for half an hour. There was no question of him waiting until the end of the dance. He had to find a way to leave. Unless Holly turned up sometime soon. Generally the elf bought some measure of interest. She might even bring Mulch, which would be as good as having his own personal circus, but that was probably too much to hope for.

Half an agonising hour later, Artemis was losing hope that Holly would come. It was unlikely that she'd be able to get a Visa, if she had even been serious about coming. It was just a huge might. Artemis felt his heart sink as he realised just how unlikely it was that Holly would turn up. It was unlike him to invest so much hope in what might have been a joke, but Artemis pushed the implications of this aside, and forced himself to think about something else.

He was staring around, trying to locate Butler and therefore an escape route that wasn't covered, when he saw something that made him finally take interest in the dance. If he hadn't had the self-control and discipline of an Olympic athlete, Artemis felt sure his mouth would have dropped open and he would have started drooling. Not a pretty sight. But the occasion almost seemed to warrant it.

Dum, dum, dum! Cliff-hanger! Not a very dramatic one, but still. Now I just have to figure out what it is that's interesting. Could it be a pretty girl? An evil alien? A disco ball with sparkly lights?

I tried to do what Claymade suggested and make Butler a little less formal with Artemis, but I think I may have gone to the other extreme with the sulking bit. Depends on how you view their relationship, I guess.