Weeee'ree back! Oh, & you so missed us.

It's actually not that hott anymore. Cuz it's
like night time. But don't get us wrong, it is
still very hott. Just not as hott as the middle of
the day. But thats completely beside the point.

We decided that our ideas need to be heard!

So we're back. And we're ready ..

CHAPTER TWO

The Stoner

The Great Hall sat in stunned silence, naught but the sound of a lone tumbleweed disturbing the peace. Although, it wasn't exactly peace, per say, it was more .. not peace. There, sillouhetted against the dim light which shone through the previously kicked open double doors, stood three figures, each in their own peculiar pose. On the left, stood a tall and masculine boy who held both arms out on either side of him, flexing his muscles with a cocky expression upon his face. Beside him, a boy stood, slightly shorter, but with equal muscular proportions, his first finger and thumb cupped in a pistol grip around his chin, a manly, yet curious expression plastered upon his features. And lastly, slightly shorter yet again, but still rather tall, was a boy who's features were shadowed by the cowboy hat he tipped stylishly on an angle infront of his face. All in all, it was quite a spectacle. And hott, can't forget the hott part... The middle one was hottest.

( KALI ; why do YOU always get the keyboard ! )
( LILY ; because i am a pirate . garhhh ! )
( KALI ; not this again ! smacks shut UP ! )

Food fell from mouths and spoons were dropped to the floor at the site, however, almost instantly the spectacle was dashed, as a bumbling idiot ruined the scene. The sillouhettes flinched as a small and pudgy boy ran into the light, his arms flailing around crazily, and a moulding chocolate bar clutched desperately in his right hand. "Sorry guys," he puffed, "Forgot Boris. Oh crap, are we posing now?"

With a small jump, he froze in position beside them, one hand on his nipple, the other on his hip, and a disgusting attempt at a seductive look upon his face. Some random girl threw up into her cereal. Even the tumbleweed reacted badly to the pose, dying instantly at seeing the horrific pose that Peter took up. The three sexier much sexier Marauders gave the cousin of Poppinfresh a disgusted look, grumbling about the ruined pose. Suddenly, James noticed Remus' cowboy hat and stared at it curiously. "Remus, where'd you get the hat from?"

( LILY ; Yuh .. Where DID he get the hat from ? )

( KALI ; Seriously . Shut up . You're embarassing me . )

( LILY ; I embarass myself sometimes . shamed expression )

( KALI ; Rolls eyes )

Remus smirked, an uncharacteristic look for him and stared at James pointedly, "My pants."

James' jaw dropped, while Sirius frowned, glancing down at his friends pants suspiciously, "What else do you have in there, Moony?"

Remus' chest puffed up proudly, "Hockey Rink. Wanna play?" Drool started to dribble down Peters chin, unnoticed by the boys, whilst he gaped at Remus' pants in ecstacy.

"No! It's in your PANTS, Remus!" James exclaimed, jumping back a little.

Remus pouted, "I wear boxers!" Sirius snorted, trying hard not to laugh at the pitiful expression on his face. "Dude .. No. Besides, I'm hungry."

Remembering where they were, Peter's and James' faces both lit up excitedly as they turned and looked at the tables filled with food. Simultaneously they shouted, "Oh YEAH!" Just as the two were about to head off to the Gryffindor table, Remus screamed, "What about my pants!" One of the girls from the Gryffindor jumped up from her seat and stormed out to where the four boys still stood. Grabbing Remus by the ear, she dragged him to the table, muttering "Don't embarass me like that ever again.." He grinned sheepishly, "Hey Shenavyre. Sweetheart. Babe. Sugarplum." He ran out of compliments quickly. Shenavyre dumped him onto the seat next to Lily, "I'm not forgiving you, Remus. No matter how cute you look."

( KALI ; he's so cute . )

( LILY ; james is hotter ! )

( KALI ; is not ! )

( LILY ; you know he is . )

( KALI ; pulls a bowie knife out of her pants don't make me threaten you . )

( LILY ; screams that came out of your pants ! )

( KALI ; yuh . there's also a cheer squad in there . )

( LILY ; eww... )

"I just wanted to pose," Remus protested, "Y'know, be a man! Look goooooooooood .. "

Shenavyre sighed, "Yes, but now I shall be known as the girlfriend of that 'dude who posed with the hat '."

"No, actually, people will just know you as the girlfriend of REMUS! The intensely lucky girlfriend of REMUS! Hot and sexy REMUS! In all his hat-posing glory ... Yuh. REMUS!"

Shenavyre blinked and then smacked Remus upside the head, "What's wrong with you?"

Remus giggled and pulled a bong out of his pants, "I'm soo stoned right now."

Shenavyre blinked again, and all in the one moment, smacked Remus again, grabbed the bong, tossed into Severus Snape's head, and smacked Remus for the third time, "What did I tell you about this?"

Remus coughed, "Uh, drugs are .. bad?" He asked uncertainly, and Shenavyre smiled.

"That's right, Remus," her smile fell, "SO WHY THE FUCK WERE YOU SMOKING A BONG!"

"It was calling to me," he said, and his voice became eerie, "Smoke me, Remussss. Smoooke meee!"
Again, she blinked, "Had you been taking any druge before that point in time .. "

Remus frowned, "I uh, maaay have snorted a little crack. Maybe.. Just a tad.." he answered nervously.

( KALI ; so uh why is remus a stoner all of a sudden ? )

( LILY ; it eases the pain of his .. 'condition' tear )
( KALI ; uh no .. no it doesn't, lily )

( LILY ; okay . maybe not . but it's funnyy ! )

&&&&&

"MAGIC MIRROR! Who's the hottest of them all!" James asked the mirror before him.
"Why, you are ofcourse." It replied, batting it's mirrorey eyelashes.

.. -wait, scratch that.

we could get sued for copyright.

Remus, James, Sirius and Peter sat in Proffessor Slughorn's Potions class, seperated into pairs of three. Much to Sirius' dissapointment, he had been placed with Peter, although Shenavyre made up the third member of their group, a god send actually, for she had no problem in slapping Peter at any given point. James and Remus were also placed together, with Lily as their third. The Proffessor gave each pair a different potion to brew, of simple proportions, so there were to be no mishaps. But it was quite clear that the real reason the lesson was set so simply, was because Slughorn had a hangover. And a massive one, at that. However, he rejected the offer of Sirius' home made remedy, and returned to his desk broodingly.

"Okay," Lily huffed, obviously upset about being placed with James Potter, "Professor. Slughorn gave us the .. " She picked up the piece of paper that had their potion written on it and scowled, looking up at James pointedly, with great annoyance in her emerald eyes, " .. The ' James is a legend ' potion" she scoffed.

"Oh Lily," James smirked, "You're much too kind. Really, you didn't have to."

Lily slapped him suddenly and randomly, "Where is the actual piece of paper?"

Rubbing the hand shaped red mark on his cheek, James shrugged, "I dunno. I gave it to Remus."

Lily frowned and turned around, "Remu-" she stopped, staring, "Remus, what are you doing?"

Remus looked up at her, grinning in an unnerving manner, "Smoking a bong. DUH!"

( KALI ; ..remmy's a permanent stoner ! NO ! )

( LILY ; ch .. yuh he is . )

( KALI ; I hate you . so very much . )

Anyway ..

Lily tilted her head curiously at Remus and turned her emerald eyes to James, "Where'd he get the drugs from, James?" He shrugged casually and smirked at Remus, giving him a thumbs-up, "No idea. Hey Remmy!"

"Yuh? You called?" He replied, smiling like the dope he is.

"Where'd you get the stash from?"

Remus giggled like a little girl, "I got it from Dumbledore's office."

James and Lily's jaws dropped, seemingly to the floor. "You what!" Lily cried, disbelieving.

James sniggered, "Where'd he have it?"

"In the Sorting Hat … How do you think he writes those songs every year? I mean, come on .." Remus continued smoking on the bong.

Lily just stared, "Anyway … About this potion .."

"Whoa .." Remus started, finishing his bong, "There's a potion!"

He was rewarded with a smack on the head from none other than Sirius. Who had been ignored for this whole time for some unknown reason.

( KALI ; we have got to stop leaving Sirius out of it . )

( LILY ; why ? he's not missing out on much . )

( KALI ; do you want Liv to kill us ? )

( Lily ; oh yeah .. )

"So … Guys … You realise I have the piece of paper right here?"

James jumped, "Whoa! Where'd you come from?"

Sirius threw Remus' bong at James, "I've been here the whole time, you idiot." Rolling his eyes, he handed the paper over to Lily.

"I can't wait til this class ends …" Lily muttered quietly.

"I concur!" Moony jumped up, raising his hand in agreement, "Because then .. I can get more BONGS!"

Silence filled the room.

"Dude .. "

( KALI ; ha .. another chapter finished . go us ! )

( LILY ;i know , eh ? yay ! )

( KALI ; hey lils .. )

( LILY ; yuh ? )

( KALI ; shut up . )

( LILY ; nevah ! )