Chapter 3:
When the night
has been too lonely
"Are you sure?" Akira asked weakly, looking at Hikaru's animated form with some misgivings about the night's plans.
"Hm?" The young man gave him a side look and smiled a bit cheekily. "Of course. Waya was the one who asked."
At that name, Akira's stomach knotted further. He had been looking forward to spending time with Hikaru and not playing go, as strange as that may sound. But he'd assumed rather blindly, that it was just going to be the two of them like it had been the last few times. He rubbed his sweaty palm on his pants and gave a short nod of defeat. He turned to follow the shorter go player. Akira was surprised to find that Hikaru was looking at him rather pensively. He opened his mouth to ask but Hikaru shook his head, his hand going up to scratch the back of his head.
"I was just thinking—" Hikaru started, cheeks flushing slightly. "Do I seem happier these days?" The question seemed banal at first and Akira blinked. If it hadn't been for the redness painting Hikaru's cheeks or the serious look in the grey-green eyes, Akira would have continued to think of the question as random and unimportant. Another one of Shindo, Hikaru's many quirks. But…it wasn't banal. He tried to find the words to answer it and found only that a lump of strange sadness had replaced the fear. "Sorry." The one word was said lightly but a bit fast. Hikaru made a face. "That was kind of random."
"No." Akira replied quickly. The bang bleached go player arched his eyebrow. "Well, not as random as you usually are anyway." That made Hikaru glare at him for being teased. He just chuckled at it before the smile dropped from his face. "As for an answer to that…I can only hope that you are."
"…" The smile that sprang on the other's lips was pensive. "I am." Hikaru's eyes caught Akira's. "Are you?" The question took him off guard, though it shouldn't have in retrospect.
"I am." His answer mirrored Hikaru's and then the two were out the door and heading to god knows where. The incident was pushed away for the moment, allowing for other emotions to make their way as the rest of the evening played out. Bracing himself for a night of unease and uncomfortable-ness, Akira remained quiet. He listened to Hikaru's slightly nonsense chatter and then listened to the conversations of the others, feeling not completely included but not disregarded either. When Akira got back to his apartment that night, alone in the darkness… the memory came back to him. It made him wonder for a moment what it meant exactly.
And if in the grand pattern of their lives, the two of them hadn't answered something altogether different than what the question had asked.
And the road
has been too long
"Do you think…" Waya started and then coughed. The question he wanted to ask was apparently embarrassing him. To prove it further, his neck started to flush. Though in the darkness of the night, Isumi could not see it. He simply knew its presence because of the length of the time the two had been together. He waited in patient silence for the rest to come, knowing that to push would only make the other silent. "Do you think they realize?"
"Realize?" Isumi asked, confused. He could assume correctly that the 'they' Waya wanted to discuss was Touya and Shindo but what should the two be realizing? Waya looked away as he blurted an answer.
"That they like each other." Oh! Oh. Isumi smiled.
"I think so." He shortened his long stride so that their walk back to their respective apartment would be at a slower pace. Waya followed suit, unconscious of the action. "Is that why you were so quiet?" He asked gently. "Are you worried?" The second question followed before the redhead could even formulate his first answer. He glared at his taller friend, wishing at times that Isumi didn't know him that well and go straight at the heart of the matter.
"A bit." He admitted grudgingly. "Aren't you?"
"…no…" Isumi said slowly, trying to pin point why exactly he wasn't. "I think, I've been expecting it to happen. But I'm not quite sure why." He gave a brief chuckle. "That must sound odd." Waya shook his head.
"Nah." His tone was strangely relieved. "It doesn't sound odd at all." Another pause and then— "Think we'll ever find that kind of…"— Waya's voice got all soft and hesitant. "…love?"
And you think
that love is only…
for the lucky and the strong
Hikaru stretched the next morning, still sleepy despite the fact that it was already early afternoon. He groaned a bit as he realized how much he'd overslept. A distant thought nagged at him that if he'd stayed at home, it wouldn't have happened. His mother would have seen to it that he get up. The nagging thought had his mother's voice. He felt a tug of sadness and home sickness which he pushed aside with practiced ease. Yeah, it sucked to live alone sometimes. But that was life. You grew up and dealt with the changes despite everything. And he was lucky. He'd stayed with his parents much longer than his friends had. His friends had also made a point of not leaving him alone. He looked around until his eyes caught sight of his magnetic go board. The memory brought a smile to tug at his lips.
With slow movement he removed the warm blankets from the rest of his body and got up. Even slower steps brought him to his kitchen. He shifted his weight from foot to foot, wondering what he could eat.
'I don't really want to be alone…' The thought came and left him. Hikaru sat at the kitchen table and inspected its wooden surface. It suddenly seemed too big and useless. A whole table for him with no one else to share its space. He leaned back on his chair until he weight was only resting on its two back feet. He swayed there and chanced reaching for the phone behind him, hoping he wouldn't lose his balance.
The number was dialed by heart.
Just remember
in the winter
far beneath the bitter snows
"Hello?" The voice answered after only two rings and Hikaru smiled.
"Hey."
"Hikaru?"
"Yep…I was just wondering if you'd like to come over and have breakfast with me."
"Breakfast? Hikaru, you do realize it's already two in the afternoon."
"Yes mom." He replied with an edge. "But I just got up and so for me… it is breakfast."
"Don't call me mom." Akira's voice replied automatically in the same manner he rebutted many of Hikaru's insults. And then the rest of what Hikaru had said was processed. "You just got up!?" There was an exasperated sigh. No doubt Akira had gotten up at his usual time despite their late night and he'd probably been disgustingly productive too. Hikaru could imagine it all too well. "Let me guess, you don't have anything that could be considered food in your apartment too…"
"What? I resent that comment! I went shopping with you…" Hikaru tried to remember.
"Two days ago." Akira answered for him. "True. You couldn't have run out of food yet. Though you never know."
"Good grief Akira. Are you coming or not?" The conversation would be so much more enjoyable if the man would just be here by his side.
"Coming, coming." Akira answered, a smile sounding in his voice. "But I'll have lunch, thank you."
He wasn't alone anymore…
Lies the seed
that with the sun's love
in the spring
becomes the rose
The end.