Chapter Two – Adjusting

The next few days were split between Carson and his tests, and Lorne and his exercises, with Teyla, Ronon or Sheppard learning about Rodney's senses as well. After three days, he no longer needed the drug to control the spikes, as they had stopped on their own, and he was released from the infirmary, with conditions. He wasn't to be alone for any length of time, in case of sensory spikes caused by unexpected ingested or environmental factors, and also in case of zone outs, which could last several hours if no one was around to pull him out.

His team took it in turns to camp out in his quarters at night, and to baby sit him during the day, though this task was also shared by Lorne and Radek.

After the sixth day, Rodney had agreed for the news of his Sentinel status to be shared with people on Atlantis. Fortunately, most people had had the sense to leave him pretty much alone, though there were the inevitable few who looked at him like he was some sort of freak. They soon changed their attitudes if one of his team or Carson, or even Major Lorne, saw the looks, or heard any comments.

The Daedalus wasn't due back for another two weeks, so telling Caldwell would have to wait, and Earth, of course, wouldn't know until the Daedalus returned again. Rodney was actually grateful for this delay, secretly worried that he would be recalled to Earth, for further 'training' if not to find a suitable Guide. He hoped to avoid that, and was grateful that Lorne knew as much as he did about Sentinels. Maybe the powers that be wouldn't recall him if they were convinced Lorne was capable of training him in the use of his senses.

He really didn't want to leave Atlantis for that long, especially as he was working on the intergalactic bridge and really didn't want to leave that in other people's hands. Sure, he could work on the macros on Earth just as easily as on Atlantis, but he wanted to be involved in finding more gates in the Pegasus Galaxy, wanted to meet his quota. Okay, so it wasn't a competition, but there was no way he was going to have Carter beat him by filling her quota before he filled his.

It was now the eighth day since his senses had enhanced themselves, and he was leaning on the rails of a balcony, looking out over the ocean. He had stormed out of a Sentinel lesson with Lorne, and stalked off on his own, finding a little used balcony to stew on.

He wasn't surprised when thirty minutes later, Sheppard walked onto the balcony, coming to stand beside him, and resting against the rail as well. Rodney sighed.

"So, Lorne says you had a hissy fit and stormed out."

"It wasn't a hissy fit," Rodney retorted.

"No? Oh. So, what was it?"

"I had a headache. I wanted to be alone. And Lorne wouldn't quit bugging me about these damn exercises and tests. So, I left."

"Uh, uh. You need to learn…"

"Yes, I know that! I just…I just needed some time to myself," Rodney looked at Sheppard. "I'm still reeling from this whole 'now I'm a Sentinel' thing. Still trying to come to terms with the fact I'm some sort of…freak. Abnormal, at the very least. And then there's everyone pushing me to learn quickly how to control it all, and I never have more than a few minutes to myself at any given time. So forgive me if I couldn't take it anymore and snapped, I think I'm entitled to!"

"You're not a freak, McKay," John said quietly, looking McKay in the eyes.

"Abnormal, then," Rodney couldn't keep eye contact and looked back out to sea.

"Huh, you've always been abnormal."

"Oh, thanks."

"No, McKay, it's true. A normal person wouldn't be able to do what you've done, wouldn't be able to understand half the things you understand," John nudged his arm. "You wouldn't really want to be of normal intelligence, would you?"

"Hardly," Rodney huffed.

"So, you see, you're already abnormal in one area, so what's the big deal if you are in another as well?"

"I suppose," though he didn't sound mollified.

"Besides, I think of it as being special, rather than abnormal."

"Special?" Rodney smiled, perking up a bit, "I think I can live with being special."

"Good. And I'll have a word with Major Lorne, ask him to back off a little bit, give you some room, but I'm not calling off your babysitters. Not just yet."

"And how long will I be watched in case of a zone out? I can't live my life like this! I need space, need to have time alone."

"I don't know how long, but we can't risk it, can't risk you. A Guide would improve things. They can tell if their Sentinel zones out, even when the Guide is miles away."

"But I don't have a Guide, and I'm still not sold on the whole bonding thing."

"I know," John sighed. "Time, Rodney. In time, it will all work out, I'm sure."

"Hmm, be patient, is that what you're saying? It's not one of my better virtues."

"Nor mine. You want to try and beat me at chess?"

"Chess?" Rodney asked, before smiling. "And what do you mean, try and beat you? I still have your IOU from the last game."

"Okay, double or nothing?"

They headed off the balcony, Sheppard leading the way to the rec room.

A game of chess later, and McKay had calmed down enough to reluctantly agree to a couple of sensory exercises with Major Lorne. Sheppard had stayed, acting as referee between the two, as Lorne's exasperation with McKay grew. After doing the two exercises, McKay had headed to his lab, and Sheppard had left him in the care of Zelenka.

He then went to find Beckett, who was in his own lab.

"Hey, doc, got a minute?"

"Um," Carson looked up from what he was doing to see who had interrupted him, and smiled. "Of course."

"I…" Sheppard fidgeted, wandering around the lab. "I think I might be… ah…" he sighed, "…developing empathy."

"Oh. You think you might be Rodney's Guide, then?"

"Ah…yeah…guess so," he turned to look at Carson. "Look, I've been getting this sense of what people are feeling, and it's getting more intense. At first I just put it down to reading body language, but it's gone beyond that now," John looked away. "You're excited, I know that, even though you're trying to seem calm and professional."

"Aye, lad, I have to admit to that," Carson said. "It's bloody exciting, this whole thing, though also quite a responsibility for me. I'd better take some blood, check your DNA for an activated gene."

"Exciting for you, maybe. Personally, this whole thing is…weird," John said, as Carson guided him into the infirmary, and gathered together the necessary equipment.

"Are you able to control it?"

"No, not yet. It's like I'll suddenly get a flash of emotion from someone, and then it's gone. But the flashes are getting more often and lasting longer."

"Ah, you're probably blocking out people's emotions most of the time, but unconsciously lowering the blocks occasionally. From what I've read about the onset of empathy, that's what happens at the start. After a few days, things will start to settle and you'll find lowering the blocks will become entirely a conscious decision, so you'll be able to control it," Carson took the blood sample whilst explaining things. "I can give you something to help minimise the effects until you gain control."

"That would be good. It's freaking me out a little bit. Just a little bit, mind you."

"Aye, of course it is. It'd be enough to freak out any sane person," Carson said, and then added with a grin. "But just a little bit. I'll check your DNA and let you know the results. Once it's confirmed, I'll get that injection for you, to help settle things down."

"Thanks, doc."

When Carson returned with the results, John wasn't surprised to find out he had an active Sentinel/Guide gene, or to receive an injection.

"Does anyone else know?" he asked.

"Just myself and you, I ran the tests personally. I'll need to inform Elizabeth…"

"Could it wait to a bit? I'd like to talk to Rodney first, before anyone else knows. We need to talk, make a decision, and I'd rather no one else interfered or put any pressure on us."

"Well, it's getting late now. I guess it can wait until tomorrow morning."

"Thanks, Carson."

"Aye, well, you know that you, and Rodney, don't have to bond, don't you?"

"Yes, we know that. We also know that we'll function better if we do bond. I just… we just need to discuss things. He might not want this…"

"Do you?" Beckett asked.

"I…" John sighed. "If you'd have asked me a few days ago, I would have said 'no way'. The bond is…scary. I know you said it was platonic, that it was like being close family, brothers in this case, but it also involves both of us being aware of the feelings of the other a lot of the time. I'm not sure either of us could cope with that level of…friendship."

"I've seen the two of you together, and believe me, the two of you are already bonded as brothers," Carson shook his head slightly with a grin. "You certainly argue like brothers. I've seen you in action, not just Rodney and you, but the whole team, and I know family when I see it. I know the bond will mean admitting to that, at least to Rodney, but it's only admitting to what is already there, the way I see it."

"Maybe."

"There's no maybe about it, lad. But it's something Rodney and you will have to decide for yourselves. One thing, if you do decide to bond, you need to wait a few days, give your body time to adjust to the empathy. Bonding now is liable to cause a lot of problems that would be avoided if you wait."

"Okay, whatever we decide, we'll wait."

"Good."

"Thanks, doc."

Sheppard moved off to find Rodney whilst Carson returned to his research, hoping that his two stubborn friends could get past the macho 'men don't share feelings' crap and form the Sentinel/Guide bond a few days from now.

Sheppard found Rodney still in his lab, which didn't surprise him any. Ronon had taken over babysitting duties, and was currently leaning against a wall looking bored.

"Hey, Ronon, I hear they're serving your favourite down in the mess hall. You want to grab some before it all goes?"

"Sounds good," Ronon said, getting the hint. "See you later, McKay."

"Hmm, oh, yeah, later," Rodney looked up from his laptop, obviously not having heard the conversation.

"So, what you working on?" John asked him.

"Trying to increase power efficiency in some of the city's functions."

"Oh," Sheppard pushed himself up onto a nearby table. "Any problems with your senses?"

"Had a zone out a couple of hours ago, but Radek pulled me out of it within ten or so minutes. No doubt the tattle tale with tell you all about it later," McKay grumped.

"No doubt, and you know full well that we need to monitor how often they happen and what sets them off so we can help minimise their occurrence. It's for your own good."

"I know, I know, I just… I feel like I'm in a fishbowl, and I don't like it one bit."

"Yeah, well, you'll not be the only one soon."

"What?"

"Good news, Rodney," Sheppard announced with false cheer. "Your Guide has come online. Carson's just confirmed it; I'm an empath."

Rodney looked stunned, and, for once, was speechless.

"Okay, that wasn't quite the reaction I had expected," John said, smiling ruefully.

"I…you…" Rodney stuttered, before his brain finally caught up. "You're a Guide?"

"Yes, newly come online. Apparently it will take two or three days for my brain to adjust to the empathy, and I need to take some sort of drug until then, a bit like you did. Then, I'll gain control, and be able to bond…should we decide to do that."

"Oh."

"That's it? Just 'oh', nothing else?"

"I…wasn't expecting this. I mean, you. For it to be you," McKay shook his head in annoyance at his mixed up speech. "Okay, so…it's you. I suppose the question is, do you want to bond with me?"

"Do you want me to?"

"I…ah…I…" Rodney stopped, and then squared his shoulders, stood and looked John in the eyes. "Yes," he said, before looking away nervously. "But only if you want to, you don't have to, we'll cope okay without the bond, and it's okay if you don't want to bond, I'll understand; no problem, no big deal, you know," he paced agitatedly. "I mean, the whole sharing each other's feelings thing is kind of scary, but I think it'd be okay, but if you don't want that, I'd understand, really I would…"

"Rodney," John interrupted him, "breathe."

"Oh, right. Sorry, sorry," Rodney sat back down. "I just, I don't want you to feel like you have to, or anything."

"To be honest, I'm surprised you would want this."

"I know, so am I. I think, if it had been anyone else, it would be different. Well, maybe with a couple of exceptions. Like maybe Teyla, or Ronon perhaps."

"Family," Sheppard said quietly. "That's what Beckett said about us, the team."

"And what you said as well."

"I did? When?"

"Oh, ah, to Teyla, on the way to Sateda. She, er, she thought we should know what you had said. Oh, she's so going to kick my ass when she finds out I've let that slip," Rodney shuddered.

"Who else has she told?"

"Just Ronon and me. I think she was trying to get me to shut up about you shooting me, but to her frustration, it didn't work. You do know I don't really hold that against you, I was just being…"

"A pain in the ass. Yeah, I know."

"You're not mad at Teyla, are you? She was just trying to help."

"No, no point in being mad at her. She'd just kick my ass as well," John grinned.

"She is so going to hurt me…"

"Well, as your Guide, I'll just have to defend you, won't I?"

"As my Guide…you mean, you want to bond?" Rodney was surprised. Sheppard nodded with a sigh, looking away from McKay and finding the wall very interesting.

"Yeah. Weird, huh? But it seems…okay. The right thing to do. Crap, I'm no good at this. It just…feels right."

"It does, doesn't it?" McKay smiled, and the snorted. "Oh crap, we sound like…"

"Brothers."

"Yeah, brothers," Rodney smiled.

"Okay, so enough of this sensitive stuff, what say we join Ronon?"

"Best idea you've had all…year," Rodney smirked. John rolled his eyes, resisting the urge to whack him upside the head…just.

Three days had passed since John's empathy had developed, and he no longer required the drug to keep control. He had a better understanding of how McKay had felt after his Sentinel senses came online, the feeling of being 'in a fishbowl' was there. Still, he knew people's curiosity would settle after a while, and those who thought he or McKay were freaks were learning to keep their opinions to themselves at least. He smiled to himself when he thought of his team's protectiveness towards each other.

Major Lorne was clearly relieved to find out that not only was Sheppard a Guide, but that Rodney and he were going to form a bond. It meant that, after some more sessions teaching John how to teach Rodney, he could pull back and leave them to it, only stepping in when called on. John couldn't fault him for that, McKay was not the easiest of people to handle at the best of times, and when he was feeling unsettled, then he could be much worse.

Now, it was time to form the bond, and he had to admit to himself that he was both terrified and excited at the thought. It went against everything he thought about himself, to actually want to let someone into his life like this. Sure, he might feel about his friends here as if they were family, but to admit it…well, Teyla knew how hard that was for him. This was more than admitting to it, this was opening himself up to someone else, sharing feelings, and being responsible on a whole other level for said person than before. He should be running from this, and a part of him still wanted to, but he wasn't. Another part of him wanted this; the friendship, the brotherhood, the…caring. It had to have something to do with being a Guide, he could only assume. And it was probably the same for McKay, another one who had difficulty with sharing the more 'sensitive, caring' emotions with people, and yet he also wanted this bond. It must be the Sentinel/Guide thing, there was no other explanation.

He just hoped they could both handle this change, without becoming too… emotional… too touchy-feely, even in a purely friendship way.

Of course, initiating the bond required some touchy-feely-ness to start with, but once the bond was formed, there would be no more need to it. Well, he might need to touch McKay's arm from time to time to ground his senses, or to pull him out of a zone out, but it wasn't like they were going to start hugging each other or anything like that. He wasn't really that kind of guy. Okay, it didn't mean a person wasn't manly; crap, try telling Ronon that hugging Beckett on Sateda wasn't manly! No, in certain circumstances it was perfectly fine; he just wasn't that sort of person.

He arrived at the balcony, the one Rodney had gone to three days ago. Nice and secluded, only McKay and himself would be there. Beckett had wanted to be with them, worried about possible problems, but they had insisted that they do this alone. He knew Beckett was close by, though, just not close enough to watch or listen. But ready to come should one of them call him via the headsets.

Rodney wasn't here yet, but that was okay. He leaned on the railing, looking seawards, and tried to calm himself.

A couple of minutes later, Rodney came and stood beside him, leaning on the railing as well.

"So, you still want to go ahead with this?" he asked nervously.

"Sure. Do you?" John responded.

"Yes."

"Okay, then. I guess we should, you know, just get it done with."

"Okay," Rodney said, standing up straight and turning to face John, who also had stood and turned to face him. "I have to admit to being somewhat…ah…nervous."

"Same here," Sheppard said. "In fact, terrified might be better."

"Oh good, glad I'm not the only one then," Rodney said in obvious relief.

"It will be okay," John wasn't sure who he was reassuring, but suspected it was both of them.

"Okay, then."

Rodney placed his right hand over John's heart and his left hand on the side of John's face, his hands shaking with nerves. John mirrored him, placing his right hand over Rodney's heart and left hand on Rodney's face. They both closed their eyes and concentrated on the heartbeat under their hands.

John could feel the fingertips on both his hands getting warm, whether it was from McKay's body heat or the link starting to grow he wasn't entirely sure. As he stood there, a tingly feeling started moving slowly down both his arms. Once it had travelled all the way down it felt like a rope, okay, an invisible rope, make that two ropes in fact, but ropes that were strong and would always link them. One rope was the telepathic link and the other was linking him to the person that was McKay (so he would always know where McKay was and what he was feeling). Instinctively they both knew when the bond felt right and was secure, and it was done.

They were bonded.

They opened their eyes, and stared in wonder for a moment, before embarrassment took over, and they quickly removed their hands.

"Wow," McKay said, leaning with his back against the railing.

"Yeah, wow," Sheppard agreed. "That was…weird, but kinda cool. I can feel you, in here," he pointed to his head.

"Same here. Totally weird…but, yes, cool too. It's not like I thought it would be. It's not like I can feel everything you are feeling, but I am more aware of you…"

"Yeah. I think I could, if I wanted to. I could read your emotions more, but I don't need to. I just have this sense of you."

"Hey, try out the telepathy," Rodney turned to him in excitement.

John concentrated on sending thoughts to Rodney.

'Can you hear this?'

"Oh boy. Oh wow. That is…so cool," McKay said excitedly. "I could hear you, in my mind. You'd think I'd be freaked out, but it was so…so…"

"…cool."

"And you can do that for a chosen few, a Clan," McKay snorted. "Sounds a bit Scottish, that."

"It's the accepted term. I've been thinking about that, about who I should make part of our Clan. I was thinking Teyla and Ronon for sure."

"Of course. Maybe Carson and Elizabeth? It could be useful if you could contact them telepathically too."

"Yeah, I thought so. We don't know how many I can handle, but four should be okay. I might be able to handle up to another four, though I'd rather not."

"There's time to think about that."

"Yeah, there is. Better go find Beckett, tell him to stop worrying. Ask him if he'd like to be part of our Clan."

"Good idea. Then, can we eat? Because for some reason I'm suddenly starving…"

"Not just me, then? Must be a side effect of the bonding. We'll see Beckett, then hit the mess hall."

"Sounds like a plan to me," Rodney said, his eyes lighting up at the thought of food.

Teyla and Ronon were both quite happy to be part of the Clan, as was Elizabeth when asked. Carson, though feeling somewhat honoured to be asked, was less sure about it. However, with some gentle encouragement from Elizabeth, and not so gentle goading from Rodney, he agreed.

The actual forming of the telepathic bond was much less embarrassing for John than the forming the Sentinel/Guide bond had been, entailing him to place one hand on the side of the face of each person in turn, but no more touchy-feely stuff than that, to his immense relief.

Now that Rodney had a Guide, it was felt that Major Lorne was not needed to go on missions with them, and that he could return to his former duties and team, for which he was extremely thankful.

After testing the telepathy out, and several days of adjusting to the Sentinel/Guide bond, the team were ready to head through the stargate again.

The End (for now)