Author's Note: I thought this one needed a bit of a tag, so here it is. Enjoy. Thanks to Tweeter for pointing out the anomalies.

Portmanteau, Part Two

"I asked who these people were, Tony," Ziva said after Gibbs had headed down to Autopsy. "These people who want us together."

Tony looked up from the pile of paperwork he was slowly working his way through and sighed. He knew he shouldn't have said anything. This was the fifth time she'd asked.

"Just let it go, Ziva," he said with a tired smile. "I was only kidding around."

"No," Ziva insisted. "There has to be basis for it somewhere. Words like 'Tiva' don't just come out of nowhere."

"It was a portmanteau," Tony said. "Or at least, that's what Ducky called it." Tony was tired – tired of paperwork, tired of this conversation, tired of Ziva. "I was just teasing."

"No," Ziva said again. "You didn't start this. Who did?"

She was staring at him with the piercing, penetrating stare that could burn a hole in your retina if you let her stare at you long enough. It was the look that had taken down a dozen or more hardened criminals in interrogation and the look that made the guys in Security never really question her if the metal detectors beeped.

"Fine," Tony said, realizing that he'd never get any more work done if he didn't get this handled. "It was all of the women in the evidence garage." Ziva's eyebrows went up in surprise. "It started when that blurry version of the video that was taken during the undercover op made it onto YouTube. Remember?"

She nodded, warily.

"Even though it was only there for a weekend, it apparently got a LOT of play. Rumor has it that the whole 'please stock the fridge with Red Bull' sequence was a favorite."

Ziva looked a bit bewildered. Tony continued.

"Fast forward to the case with the one man and two fiancées. Remember the day that we each had a box of evidence to go through and we were matching underwear for underwear?" Ziva nodded. "Apparently, a couple of the 'baggie bunnies' were watching us and decided that the stuff in the hotel room wasn't being faked and that we had 'chemistry'. They've been teasing me about it ever since."

Ziva was speechless. She was trying to remember what they'd said and how they'd said it. And she started going mentally through other instances when she and Tony would have been observed by other people, trying to figure out if there were any other times that people might have misunderstood. Tony watched her with amusement. He could actually see her mind working. It wasn't often that Ziva was at a lack for words, even if she didn't always use all the right ones.

"Ziva?" Tony said, trying to break her concentration. "Zeeee-vaaaaaah," he sing-songed. She looked up. "You okay?"

"I'm fine, Tony," she said, still obviously thinking. "But I'm beginning to understand how people might have gotten the impression that we'd hooked on."

"Hooked up," Tony corrected.

"Yes … whatever," Ziva said absently. Suddenly, she remembered the photos that they had shown her at the Embassy – the photos of Tony arriving at and leaving her house. Even those, innocent as they were, were incriminating. This had to stop.

"Why aren't they teasing me?" Ziva asked. Tony cocked his head at her, confused. "About our 'chemistry'," she continued. "Why aren't they teasing me?"

"They're afraid of you," Tony replied, matter-of-factly.

Ziva smiled. Tony felt a chill in the room and considered calling the evidence garage to warn them.

"Look, Ziva," Tony said, trying to smooth things over. "It's not that big of a deal. I won't ever mention it again. I promise."

"Not good enough," Ziva said, as she rose to her feet and headed to the elevator. "I have other fish on the fire … other irons in the sea," she said. Tony opened his mouth to correct her and then decided that she was close enough. "I'd prefer that none of them hear any second-hand gossip and think that we're together."

"Would it be that bad?" Tony said with a fake-hurt look and an amused pout.

"Yes, Tony, it would."

And for once, Tony had to agree with her. Rule 12 aside, Tony really didn't like office relationships. Paula would have been okay – she was in a different office, different sector. They could have seen each other without anyone knowing, and without it affecting cases. But Ziva was another story. Tony could imagine a few rolls in the hay … a few nights of wine and passion and perhaps a little experimentation, but it wouldn't last, and that would be the dangerous part.

If he ended it, the phrase "a woman scorned" would take on a whole new meaning. Ziva would make Lt. Pam Kim look like Snow White. And if Ziva ended it, he'd have to listen to her explaining to everyone in the office why, over and over again, in excruciating detail. He'd probably have to start using an assumed name and only date people who lived outside a 20-mile radius. Yeah … a fling with Ziva was out of the question.

Ziva was gone for over an hour. Gibbs came back upstairs twice looking for her, and Tony covered.

Finally, she came striding out of the elevator, a satisfied look on her face. She dropped her gear and sat back in front of her computer.

"Well?" Tony said, eyebrows raised and waiting for a report.

Ziva looked up and smiled. "They don't think we're together any more."

"O-kay …" Tony said slowly. "And …"

"And they're still afraid of me."